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legal or not?

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  • legal or not?

    Me and my mother have had a crazy relationship over the past years. She went from being my best friend to the one I can't stand the most. We argue constantly. And when I say constantly I mean like 3 or 4 major arguments a day to where it may get so heated shell get in my face and push me.
    She gets mad at me and will just go off for the smallest reasons. Like even today around 6pm..... I got yelled at because I said I didn't want to go to the conveinent store anymore??!? She told me to go upstairs (to my room) and that she hates me and that I could leave and she dosnt give a damn about me. Previously this month she told my older sister to leave.... and didn't give her a chance to get any of her belongings.
    Later that day after looking for my sister( on my own) and packing a bag for her I got in trouble!!
    I mean my sister means everything to me and I went out of my way to make sure she would have clothes (money of mine) and made sure she had a place to stay that night.

    Anyway I've run away before when I was younger... when I was 14 I ran away and my mom found me and mad me come back home. She then told me to call the police and tell them to come and get me because she dosnt want me anymore.

    My first question that I have is I'm 16 and I can't take being under my mothers house hold any longer.... could I get in trouble umm legal wise (if I stayed with a blood relative)....or a friend. I won't leave the state of maryland. I'm actually in summer school too

    I'm an c and D or lower student and I've been trying my hardest to make my mom happy. I'm geeting all A's in summer school and is ranked 1st in my geometry class.
    So why is she so hurtful to me? There used to be a time when she and I could talk about everything. Now we can't even speak to each other....with out arguing about something pointless.
    I have been cutting myself since I was in 7th grade. My mom knows about it. I've stop for a while. (8th to the end of 9th grade)but I'm sad to say that I've started up with my umm.... bad habit again. (Relapsing) I'm crying all the time very anxious about things and I feel traped. Some days I have no energy at all other days I don't even want to wake up...
    Everything going on in my house is causing me so much stress and I really do think that I'm going insane! And bein here isn't going to make things any better. So staying isn't an option for me

    What hurts the most is that I have a 4 year old brother who means the world to me and he's so used to hearing the negitive things that my mom will say to me that he actually starts to say mean things to me as well

    I know your probably going to say have I tried speaking to her and the truth is I've tried many many times. Even when i try to remain calm she will continue to yell. talking is no longer an option for me
    I have my bags packed and I'm ready to leave here.

    So..... again
    Would I be considered a runaway if I went to stay with an aunt or blood reletive or friend for a while at least untill summer school is over for me?
    And is llegal to runaway? And if it is what were to happen to me if I get in trouble.?
    I live in maryland,if that helps...

    I have a place to stay I have money. Ill continue to go to summer school and all that

    And since she told me to leave would I really be considered as a run away?
    Also is there anything I could do to make sure she can't find me untill I am not only physically and emotionally ready to return back home.
    Please help me... as soon as possible ill be on this website all day and night for a responce
    And I apoligize if this was too long... thanks a bunch

  • #2
    Re: legal or not?

    Thanks for sharing a little bit about what’s been going on. It’s probably hard to sum up everything that’s happened in the last few years. It sounds like, from what you wrote that your home life has been pretty rocky for a while now. It’s probably really confusing and frustrating to have your relationship with your mom change so drastically. It also sounds like the communication between you and your mom tends to be arguing more than anything else. It has to be difficult living in a house where you are constantly arguing with someone. Does your mom treat your siblings like this also? You mentioned your older sister left a month ago after your mom told her to leave, so it’s probably safe to assume that your mom treated her the same way. It’s completely understandable why you wouldn’t want to stay at home any longer. You mentioned that you’ve tried talking to your mom and that hasn’t worked, so now you want to just leave. Have you asked her about living somewhere else? Do you think she'd ever agree to you living with your aunt or another relative?

    You asked a lot of questions about the legality of running away. Here’s what we know about running away. A youth under 18 will be considered a runaway if they don’t have their legal guardian’s permission to leave the house. It doesn’t matter where the youth goes, relative or friend, they are still considered a runaway if their guardian didn’t give them permission to be there. Generally, running away is not considered illegal, but rather a status offense. This just means you’re not allowed to do it because you’re a minor. There aren’t usually consequences for running away; sometimes a youth will be brought to the juvenile detention for 24 or 48 hours and held until the parents can come and pick them up. Usually what happens when a runaway youth is found is they are brought back home. You also mentioned that your mom told you to leave and asked if you’d still be considered a runaway. Technically, if your mom was to make you leave the house, then you’d be considered a “throwaway”. In situations like this, youth do have the right to call the police and file a report (sometimes called a lock out report). It’s kind of like the opposite of a runaway report. However, what usually happens when a youth files these reports or lets the police know they’ve been kicked out, is that the police want to bring them home and tell their guardian they can’t kick out their underage youth. You obviously have the option to not call the police if she makes you leave, but it would make it so that she could still file a runaway report (it would turn into a he said, she said type of thing).

    Hope it helps to understand a little more about what running away means and what could possibly happen if you do leave. Knowing all this, do you think you’ll still leave? If you do decide to leave anyways, do you have a safe place you can go? How will you survive? Running away is a big decision, so it’s great that you’re really thinking through it and asking questions about it. We’d be happy to talk to you more in depth about any or all of this. Our hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY, is available 24/7. Give us a call sometime.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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