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My Runaway Rights in North Carolina

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there thanks for reaching out to us. We are sorry to hear that living at home with your parents has been challenging and sounds stressful. As you mentioned, fighting with your family sounds extremely frustrating. We think it is great you are reaching out and we are here to support you and brainstorm with you about some options that you think may best fit your situation.

    It sounds like living in your home is difficult with the fighting and you sometimes feel suicidal. We do want to mention the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255/suicidepreventionlifeline.org) are a great resource that are always there to listen if you do feel suicidal. Although you do not have to be suicidal to call, they are 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you. They are always there to listen if you want to talk to someone. If you are ever in immediate danger of taking your own life, you can call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room for immediate help. Calling 911, someone will be sent to check on you. We are also 24/7 by call (1-800-786-2929) and live chat here on our website and are always open to talking to youth struggling with things like problems with their parents, custody, and mental health.

    It is not okay to be verbally attacked by your family and treated in a way that makes you feel broken. It sounds hard being at home in an environment that makes you feel less than others in your family. We do want to mention if you feel what is according is abusive from your family, you always have the right to report. Child Help (1-800-422-4453, childhelp.org) is another organization that has crisis counselors on staff 24/7 who can give you more information on abuse situations, what is considered abuse, and how to report if you do want to explore that as well. We can also help you explore abuse reporting as well as reporting with you if you do want to pursue that option. We are mandated reporters meaning if you share any personal info (like your name, address, you parents’ names, etc) we would have to pass along what we know to Child Protective Services, but if you do not share that info we can continue to talk confidentially as we are now. We can also brainstorm other options like emancipation and if you do decide to leave home we can always talk about that as well as your safety is our top priority.


    Thanks again for reaching out! It shows a lot of strength, as you are certainly going through a lot and that can be hard to talk about.
    We are 24/7 and feel free to reach out to us any time by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

    Best, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My whole life I’ve had problems with my family but it’s gotten worse. I’m 15 and from North Carolina and thinking about emancipation or running away. My mom and dad yell at me constantly about anything I do even if I don’t do anything wrong and my siblings both hate me and want nothing to do with me. 2 weeks ago I got in a big fight with my family and after I came home from summer camp yesterday I immediately was attacked verbally by my family and they told me they were happier before I came home. I don’t know what to do but I’m so broken and borderline suicidal and don’t want to live in my house anymore I can’t stay here till I’m 18

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,
    Thank you so much for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline! First of all, it is very brave and kind of you to reach out on behalf of your friend and we think it is extremely admirable that you want to help your friend. It sounds like your friend is in a very frustrating situation. Everyone should feel safe at home and feel loved and respected.
    If your friend doesn’t feel comfortable talking with her parents and explaining to them how she does not deserve this kind of verbal abuse, she can also look into group therapy with her parents. If there is anyone at school that she trusts like a teacher or a guidance counselor, to sit down all together and talk through what is going on at home. Or if there is another member of her family that wouldn’t mind mediating that conversation. If not, we at the National Runaway Safeline are also always here and would be more than happy to facilitate a conference call with your friend and her parents. We would talk with your friend first about what they’re going through and then once she is ready, we would go ahead and conference in her parents and mediate the conversation to ensure that there is no verbal abuse and try to make sure each party understands each point of view.
    What you mentioned is correct, if your friend leaves her home without her parents’ permission, they could file a runaway report with the police. What this would mean is that if the police found out where she was, they may be able to pick her up and then could charge you and your family with harboring a runaway.
    If you or your friend have any questions or simply would like to talk things through, we are always here. We are available 24/7 toll free and you can reach us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We wish you and your friend the best of luck with everything!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi. I have a friend who is 13. She is having a really rough time with her family right now. It’s been going on for a while. There is no physical abuse. But I guess you could consider it verbal abuse. They get on her for every little thing. Even when she has done nothing wrong. Is it possible for her to live with me? Or would my family get charged with harboring a runaway. She is just not happy in her home right now. And I really want to help her

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod10
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for telling us your story and reaching out. It takes a strong person to tell others what has happened to them. We know how important being supported by the ones you love is. We are sorry to hear that your mom is not spending time with you and is spending your money on herself. Hopefully things will be different when you go and stay with your dad. One service we can offer until then is to conference call with your mom. This way you could have a conversation with your mom but you would not be alone. For example, it may be hard for you to explain to your mom how she makes you feel when she does not spend time with you or why you want to go live with your dad. Sometimes those conversations go better in a conference call because we can advocate for you. If you want to reach us, you can chat with us anytime at 1800runaway.org or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re here 24/7, and we are ready to listen and help however we can.

    Wish you the best

    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I have learning disabled. My mom is not spending time with me. I get a check and child support. I don't get nothing out of it. I am tired
    ​​​​ of being used so many years. I am turning 16 in January 17 2020. I am planning to stay with my Dad. All my mom do is spending money on her self


    ​​​​


    ​​​​

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi,
    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a situation at home that is unhealthy and unsafe, and this must be really hard. We are so glad you have contacted us for help.
    It is important you know that no one deserves to be abused, physically or mentally. If you are ever in a situation at home that is threatening your safety, you can always call Child Help, the National Child Abuse Hotline. They are there to support you and can even help you report the incident, just like you have done in the past. It must feel very frustrating to not get to go anywhere, to not be trusted, and to be accused of things. It sounds like you are not being respected by your family. Now you want to run away, but you are concerned about whether or not you will get in trouble. We are not legal experts here, but it is our general knowledge that if you run away in any state as a minor, you parent or legal guardian can report you as a runaway and the police can try to find you and bring you back home. This is something to consider as you contemplate running away. If you have more concerns or questions about running away, you are welcome to call us and we can help. We are here 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929.
    We hope that you find this helpful. You are very brave to have reached out to us. Your situation must feel lonely and hard at times, but you are taking big, important steps already. Good luck to you!

    Sincerely,
    National Runaway Safeline

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I am 14 years old and live in North Carolina will be 15 in August but I was wondering if I would get in any trouble if I ran away from home because I ran away in the past and went live with my sister for a while after living with my mom because my step mom was hitting on me and left a mark on my face and I called the law now I decided to come back and try to give them another chance to show me that they really do care about me but it’s like they won’t let me go anywhere and they don’t trust me and they’re always accusing me of something might not abuse me physically know but now it’s like she’s 24 seven mentally abusing me so would I get in any trouble

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod11
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,
    Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It takes great courage to reach out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out.

    It sounds like you are having a hard time with your mom and want to be independent. It also seems like you realize you do have some challenges but you would like to make decisions on your own. This can be certainly challenging. Talking to your mom about how you feel and coming up with a plan with your therapist, doctor or social worker about how you can be a little more independent without putting your safety at risk can be helpful. Your safety is of utmost importance and it can be be helpful to talk discuss this with appropriate people before taking any steps. We are not legal experts however if your mom is to file a police report and she is your guardian the police can bring you back home.

    Living by yourself can be challenging. It can be helpful to think about how you might pay for rent, food, and other living expenses. It can be helpful to calculate how much you make right now and subtract taxes, and the average rent in your area and living expenses before taking any steps to make sure you could afford living by yourself. Also it may be possible that since your mom is your guardian many places may need your mom's permission to let you stay by yourself.

    We are here to support you through this hard. If you chose you can call us at our confidential hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929) and we can listen to you, explore your options and provide you resources. You can also contact NAMI at 1-800-950-NAMI and they can help support you through your challenges.

    You are acting strong by reaching out for help. We wish you the best.

    Best,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 24 years old but my mom has guardianship over me when I was 20 and she still has guardianship over me. I have a job and I know how budget and I know how dress myself. Yes I little bit learning difficulties, but I know how life works around me. I want to be free and tired of living under my moms roof. Can I run away without the police doing anything about it ?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod7
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for contacting National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you feel betrayed by your family and are experiencing some stress caused by this. We are here for you and we can provide support for you.

    We are not legal experts here at NRS, but we can provide you with some general legal information. As a minor, your parents may be entitled to file a runaway report if you do choose to runaway. Running away is a status offense. Which means that you could be picked up by the police and taken back to your legal guardians. Additionally, while we are not legal experts, if you would be staying with an adult that is not your legal guardian, they could be at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway, which is usually considered a misdemeanor.

    If you feel like your home is not in a safe place, you can reach out to Child Help, which is a National Child Abuse Hotline, and can be reached at 1-800-422-4453, or childhelp.org. If you ever feel like you are in immediate danger, call emergency services at 911.

    Thank you again for reaching out to us. If you would like to talk more about this situation, please feel free to reach us by phone or chat. Our hotline is 24/7 and toll free (1-800-786-2929).

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Neglect, Emotional Health deteriorating, mental health messed up

    Hi I’m 15 years old, I’ll be 16 in a couple months. I have a boyfriend who is 19. My parents were okay with it at first but the other day, things went downhill fast. The other night I got caught doing something I wasn’t supposed to with my boyfriend (he was spending the night that night). I live with my parents and my grandma and my little sister. My grandma caught me and I thought she wouldn’t do what she did. She went straight into my parents room and told my parents . Then she grabbed my boyfriend by the throat and pushed him out of my house. Then she hit me across the face multiple times. Take into consideration that she just had severe neck surgery. But anyways she hurt me and my boyfriend. When my mom came out of the room she pushed my grandma (my grandmas my dads mom). My mom has always stuck up for me. Then I was screamed at by my dad saying I’m such a whore I should die he’ll bear my ass. Then he told me to get out. He kicked me out. My boyfriend was gonna press charges for assault and neglect for me my mom and him. But my dad threatened to Jill him. The next morning after things calmed down and we were told to come back in. We were told to get out again. This time all 3 of us us left. But for hours my dad called my mom me and my boyfriend and threatened all of us to call the cops. He threatened to put me in for runaway, when he told me to get out. He threatened to put my mom in, for neglect when she was told to get out. He threatened to put my boyfriend in for kid napping, when he didn’t kidnap me at all. Then my dad calls my grandfather and tells him everything. Finally my dad comes to get us 3 and to take my boyfriend home because he didn’t have a ride until the next morning. My dad promised for everything to be ok in a week. I didn’t get my phone taken, I just wasn’t able to see my boyfriend for a week or two. Then my little sister tells on me and almost gets me put away in jail. Then last night my cousin calls me and says I can talk to her if I need to rant but then I rant to her and she calls my grandma and gets me into more trouble. It’s a lot of betrayal. I wanna runaway and live with my boyfriend. But I’m concerned about the laws.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for contacting us, it takes a lot of courage to reach out and share your story. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do. We aren’t legal experts here at NRS, but generally speaking, if you do opt to leave your home your parents can file a runaway report, which is essentially a missing person report. Running away is a status offense; this means that it isn’t illegal, but it’s something you can’t do while still a minor. If a runaway report is filed and you are located by the authorities you will most likely be returned to your parents.

    You parents should be taking away basic necessities like your clothing and bedding and denying you an education. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home or if you feel like there is neglect of your general needs, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It may also be a good idea to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

    It is perfectly okay to deviate from what your parents or others believe to be “normal”. It is completely natural to explore and discover your sexuality. You are so strong for having gone through so much without having the acceptance that you do deserve for just being you. Remember that you are not alone. The LGBT Youth National Talkline could be a resource that can be a source of great support. The hotline is run by those that are familiar with the issues and experiences of those that are also a part of the LGBTQ community. You can reach them by calling 1-800-246-7743 or you can check out their website at gltbhotline.org. You can also check out the Trevor Project, an organization dedicated to helping LGBT teens by calling 866-488-7386 or by going to thetrevorproject.org.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    All the best,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I'm 16 but I turn 17 in less than a month. My parents have recently found out I was questioning my sexuality and they didnt take it well. They took me out of the last month of school before it ended and they took everything away from me. When I say everything I dont just mean electronics they took my bed away and the door off my hinges. They have even went as far to take away my clothes until I even have 3 outfits. Since all of this I have tried to talk with my parents but I have been meet with beatings and more punishments so I try not to talk much now from fear. I'm scared of them and currently just want to leave I have a safe place to go but I'm unsure if legally I can go. I have read about certain cases where a 17 year old has been able to leave. I just dont think I'll be able to do another year with this treatment and sleeping on a floor with a sheet.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there,

    Thank you for reaching out to NRS and for sharing your story with us. We are sorry to hear about your situation and what you’ve been dealing with. Ideally, home would be a place where people feel safe, loved, and valued, and you do not deserve to be treated that way. You’ve been very courageous to reach out for help and try your best despite the circumstances.

    Although NRS is not a legal agency, we can try to give a general idea of possible outcomes if you were to run away. As you are considered a minor in your state, you are still under your parents’ guardianship, therefore at any point when you are gone, your dad would be legally within his rights to file a runaway report. Being a runaway is a status offense, and while you would not be charged with a crime, if police came across you, they would probably return you home. Guardians could also potentially press charges against people who took you into their care for “harboring a runaway;” these charges would be misdemeanors, but still criminal offenses.

    In regards to your plan of living with your friend’s family, we would encourage you to speak with your father if you haven’t already about this. Some things to consider would be guardianship, school enrollment, how you would take care of your needs (eating, sleeping, healthcare), and how you would care for your safety if something were to happen. If you were interested, we also offer conference-calling as an option, where we would mediate a constructive conversation between your parents and yourself in order to reach an understanding.

    If you would like to share more, please feel free to call our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or use our Live Chat.


    We hope this information was helpful and take care,
    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
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