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My Runaway Rights in North Carolina

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello I am a 17 year old female. I live in Charlotte, NC in Mecklenburg county. I live with my biological mother and her alcoholic boyfriend. I have problems with suicidal thoughts and depression, but my mother or father do not get me help I have asked repeatedly And also have problems with self harm. My mother is very controlling and I am in a very unstable home and am in need of a stability household. I had a stable home open to me by my boyfriends family he is 18. But my mother did not like the fact I rather live with him and threatens to call the cops on me and him and threatens to tar us apart if he does not get a job which he is working on. Recently I called the cops because I was felling Suicidal and was having a panic attack and they told me about emancipation, but mother found out and cut all my ties with him and is trying to stalk me when i go to friends house has a tracker on my pone show up to where i am to make sure im actually there , she stalks my messages, I have a job, I am offering to pay my own phone bill and have transportation to work and school and a stable home. My mom does do drugs and her boyfriend is an alcoholic who kicks us out when he gets angry and has been very disrespectful to my friends and me and has been in and out of rehab and jail and has a record. I was wondering if i could leave home and stay with my boyfriend and his mother and two younger brothers for a stable environment for my mental health reasons. Without the cops tacking back home because I can not put up with the unstable house hold, I dont wanna go back to panic attacks, mental breakdowns and selfharm again. And can not take the mental abuse anymore, I feel i can not live through it for a whole year until im 18 In December ( 9 months)

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  • ccsmod10
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We want you to know that any form of abuse is never acceptable and it is terrible that she has to experience that. If you ever feel as though your girlfriend is in immediate danger, please call 9-1-1 on her behalf, immediately. Another resource that you may find beneficial is called Child Help. Their phone number is 1-800-422-4453. Additionaly, if you or her ever find yourself in a compromising position or are on the run, do not hesitate to call us at our 24/7 toll free number (1-800-786-2929) or use our live chat services.

    We noticed that you mentioned she wanted to run away as well. Often times, this is a very difficult conversation to have with someone that you care about. If she (or you) has a trusted friend or relative, sometimes it is useful to have someone by your side to have the conversation all together. If you’re interested, we here at NRS offer a conference calling service, between the youth and her parents. What happens with this is she would call our number at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), let us know about her situation and that she is interested in a conference call with her father, and we would call out to him. After talking to her about what is going on, we would connect the call and act as a line of support to her. We strive to make these calls as positive and compromise-driven as possible, such that your girlfriend’s situation improves in such a way that is more manageable for you and her.

    Hearing something like that happen can be very hard for a person to make sense of and have to think about. A school guidance counselor may also be a good resource for you. You would want to keep in mind, however, that teachers and other school-professionals are mandated reporters of abuse, which means that when they here or abuse or assault, they are required to report this to the child protective services. This might be a report you would be interested in making. If you would like more information on reporting and/or want support in doing that, we are happy to talk to her (or you) about that process and possibly move forward with filing a report on her behalf by contacting us as 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

    You are an amazing boyfriend for supporting her through her difficult struggles at home. If you want to talk more about your thoughts on the issue or talk through ways that you can support her, we are happy to talk to you at any time here at NRS at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are a 24/7, toll-free, completely confidential hotline. Here to listen, here to help.

    Best of luck,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi, I am 17 and my girlfriend is 16 and one time we were hanging out and she told me that she doesn’t want to go home because her dad was home and she is scared of what he might think she was doing while she had been gone. She always tells me how he abuses her and how she wants to move out but he won’t let her and she is at the verge of running away. Any suggestions on how I could help her?

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  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey,
    Thanks for reaching to us, which sometimes can be really hard, but we're glad you came to us. It sounds like you're in pretty tough situation, and we definitely want to offer you some options to get you in a better place.
    You mentioned abuse, and if your mother is abusing you, that's never ok. It's just never ok to hit a child. You have some options in reporting this. We can definitely help you with this if you call us at 1-800-786-2929. We know it can be really hard to take this step but we can do it with you. Another option is for you to call your local police or also Child Help at 1-800-422-4453.
    In terms of moving out at 16, there is the option of emancipation, just keep in mind we aren't legal experts here. If you want some legal resources, please do call our crisis line mentioned earlier. In North Carolina there is the option that you can petition the court for emancipation at 16. There are a number of things the court will look at including the parental need for any of your earnings, the youth's ability to function as an adult, employment status, the extent of the problems at home, and the quality of the parental support you get. Keep in mind these are just a couple things, but would recommend legal support if you choose to go this route.
    Without emancipation, the age of majority in North Carolina is 18, so techincally your mother could have you returned home if you leave. Potentially you may be able to get around this if you have the adults you're staying with call the police and report that you are there. Without knowing much about your background though, we can't really say for sure though how your local police will react, and in some cases police do not actively look for the youth once they are above a certain age.
    We hope this has been helpful, and remember we're here 24/7 if you want to call us. We're here to listen, here to help. Best of luck!

    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi, im turning 16 soon, my father is im prison and me and my mother dont get along at all, shes abusive and tends to call the police if i leave to avoid her, i have a few adults whom im close to and theyve offered me a home once im 16, if i move with them, can my mother call the police ans have me brought back home and will those adults be introuble, i spent losts of my childhood in court for custody issues with my parents and ive heard that has a toll on this issue as well.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,
    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you’ve been going through a tough time, but we are here to support you and help you in any way we can. That sounds stressful to be living in a place you’ve never lived before.
    We’re not legal experts here at NRS, but generally, the three ways to legally leave home are with parents’ consent, emancipation (a legal process where a youth is considered an adult), and if there is abuse in the home. In some states, youth are automatically emancipated if they have a child. To learn more about this or ask other questions about the laws in your state, we have legal aid resources you could contact.
    Again, we’re not legal experts, but according to sexetc.org, the legal age to be an adult in both Georgia and North Carolina is 18. Generally it’s not illegal to leave home, but your dad could file a runaway report, the police could get involved, and they could bring you home. The people you’re staying with could potentially get in trouble for having you stay there. Some police departments don’t accept runaway reports for 17 year olds, but the policies may vary by each department. You could consider calling your local nonemergency police department to ask about their policies.
    If you haven’t already, you could consider reaching out to a trusted adult, relative, worker/teacher/counselor at your school for help and support. You could also consider talking to your dad about how you’ve been feeling or having someone else help you talk with him. Just so you know, we have a service called conference calling where we could help mediate a conversation between you and your dad. You mentioned that you were sent to your dad by the ‘state of Georgia’. If you had a case worker during this time, you could also consider reaching out to them for help.
    There are also many resources that could help you find a safe place if you’re in need, talk through your concerns, or help you with anything else you may need. If you want to talk more about what’s been going on, or if you would like more information about resources, you can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us online.
    Again, thank you or contacting us. It sounds like you’ve been going through a hard time, but you’ve shown a lot of strength by working through these challenges and reaching out for help. If you ever need anything in the future, please feel free to call us or chat with us online. We’re always here to listen and here to help.
    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    hey. I'm 17 years old , I have a almost 2 year old daughter. I moved in with my father in north Carolina about 6-7 months ago , I've never lived with him ever before in my live. right now he is just a foster parent because the state of Georgia sent me up here , is there any possible way , I could move out without his consent ? I know in Georgia at 17 if they report a runaway they can't do anything about it because at 17 they consider you as an adult .

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks so much for reaching out. We’re glad to know this youth has someone who is willing to advocate for them. Many youth don’t have people helping them stay safe, so we want to commend you for trying your best to help out.

    You say that this youth was beaten by his father before he ran away. We have a few resources for youth who have experienced violence in the home. We can file abuse reports for children who need it, and we can help them unpack these experiences over the phone (1-800-786-2929). Abuse reports are helpful for youth who want social workers to assess their home situation, and who are looking to be housed outside of the home in which the abuse occurred.

    Unfortunately, we are not legal experts, and runaway laws vary across the U.S. We therefore will not be able to give you specific legal information in response to your questions with 100% confidence. We can provide general information, however, and we encourage you to double check this information with your non-emergency police department.

    If you try to help a child who ran away from home by housing them, you may get charged with harboring a runaway. Our understanding is that police officers file these charges, and they have some discretion as to whether or not these charges are filed. Perhaps your commitment to providing this youth a safe, warm place to sleep for the night would prevent police from filing these charges. We, however, cannot guarantee that. The youth who ran away is unlikely to be arrested, as running away is usually considered a status offense (like breaking curfew), and not a criminal offense (like homicide).

    You also are free to call the police about the situation and see how they wish to handle it. Police are likely to return a runaway youth home unless the youth alleges their parents abused them. In this case, the police may choose to involve CPS and rehouse the youth. You should not be able to make a runaway report on the youth’s behalf; only a parent can file a runaway report.

    Because you may be considered someone who “harbored” this runaway, it’s very unlikely the police or anyone else will notify you that the runaway is safe outside of your home. Feel free to talk with this runaway and let them know to contact you and let you know they are safe.

    Hopefully, this information helped you out. We encourage you and the youth to call us for further resources and support. Best of luck.

    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    To Whom It May Concern;
    I have a young 16-year-old adolescent who was beaten by his father run away and ask for a safe place to stay. He says he is afraid for his life. His biological mother lives in Missouri and is trying to find a way to help him.
    1-What will happen to me if I help this child have a safe warm place to sleep for the night?
    2-Do I call the police in the morning to file a report?
    3- How will I know he will be ok?
    4- Will CPS be involved?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod7
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi, thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like home is really hard with your mom doing drugs and it’s hard to when your parent doesn’t support your goals. And your dad’s death from alcohol poisoning is a lot to deal with on top of everything else you’re going through. You deserve the life you’ve envisioned for yourself; you deserve to achieve your goals and feel supported. So really, thank you sincerely for reaching out to us.

    Since we don’t know your age, it’s more difficult to answer your question about emancipation. In general, a judge needs to see that you are financially able to care for yourself. We do have a legal referral for you: Legal Aid of North Carolina, they provide free legal help to low-income North Carolinians in civil (meaning non-criminal) cases involving basic human needs like safety and shelter.

    If you were to call our 24-hour confidential hotline, we can discuss with you the other options you have for your situation. If you call during the business hours of the agency above, we can call with you and be with you as your advocate.

    Our hotline number is 1-800-RUNAWAY; and our live-chat is available 4:30-11:30 pm central time. We hope you will contact us again, and we wish you the best of luck.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I do not want to live with my mother all she does is snort pills and do drugs. Sge dont want the same goals i do in life. I want to get emancipated but i dont know how i dont want to end up like my mother and i cant live with my dad because he died of alcohol poisoning i dont know what to do.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello, Thank you for using NRS forum. It sounds like you are in need to transportation assistance. We do offer a Home Free program, which reunites qualifying young people 12-21 with their families. If you are between the ages of 12-21, we encourage you to give us a call to start the Home Free process. At this time, Home Free is only available over the phone. When you call, explain you are interested in returning home and we will talk to you about your situation.
    We hope that you are able to get a hold of us to start the process.
    Best wishes,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Can somebody help me get to North Carolina by this Friday I’m in Texarkana Texas and I will have money I’m trying to bounce ASAP pls anyone

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there, thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS, we’re happy to help. Though it varies by state and municipality, in most communities, the age of majority, or when you’d be considered a legal adult, is 18. Prior to this point, your mom would still be considered your legal guardian and is responsible for your care.

    If your mother chose to call the police and file a runaway report, you would most likely be returned to your home. Running away is a status offense, so you wouldn’t get in trouble legally. However, most areas have laws regarding harboring a runaway and/or contributing to the delinquency of a minor. This could put those you’re staying with at risk legally, even if they’re okay with you being there, or if they think they’re doing the right thing.

    Though you didn’t say anything about it in your bulletin, it’s worth mentioning that your safety is important. If staying at home feels unsafe or dangerous, there are people you can talk to about it. Our hotline is available 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY if you have any other questions, need some resources, or would just like to talk about what’s going on at home. Good luck!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I’m 16 years old and I had run away from my house and my mom knows where I am and I think she wants to call the police can the police make me go back home if I don’t want to

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