I'm 14 and I want to move out

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

i’m 14 & i life in a BAD household i’ve seen my mom and my uncle OD i tired moving many times now that i’m forced to go bad i dont know if i can someone please just help me with my anxiety and depression

[ccsmod15]

Hey there,
Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline (NRS. It seems like you have been through a lot and that home isn’t a safe place for you to stay. You shouldn’t have to live in a situation where you are consistently a witness to drug use and put in a position where home isn’t stable because of your parents’ decisions. It is understandable to ask for help with the mental health issues that have cropped up because of the situation at home.
For help with anxiety and depression we generally recommend finding a therapist or counselor locally that can provide you one on one help. If that isn’t possible www.nami.org is a good place to find resources for dealing with those difficulties and having someone to talk to about them. You might also be able to get help by asking your school therapist for mental health resources. Usually a school therapist is a mandated reporter, so if they have reason to believe you are being abused at home they would need to report it to CPS/DCFS and have it investigated for your safety.
You can also report what the living situation is on your own or with the help of anyone you trust. Putting you in a position where you are seeing drug use at home consistently is not OK and might count as child abuse. As such CPS/DCFS might be able to take action and help remove you from the situation or offer up other help to get the household to a healthier place.
If you want help reporting the situation, or want someone to vent with we are happy to be here to talk with you and listen to your situation more. You deserve support through this and we are available 24/7 to talk on the phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY or through online chat at www.1800runaway.org.
Stay Safe,
NRS.

[Guest]

I’m 14 and I think I have bipolar disorder or manic depression I’ve been feeling like this for approximately 4 years now , when I was 10 my dad chocked my mum in front of me and after that I began too self harm and had bad thoughts, I don’t self harm anymore - I want too sometimes but after 3 years of no one knowing I did it my mum sor the scar on my arm (I always wear hoodies or jumpers but this day I had forgotten too put one on) and she asked me what it was for and I’m a bad liar and she didn’t believe my excuse so I told her and she screamed at me saying I was selfish and an attention seeking. My mum drinks a lot and her boyfriend is mentally abusive they constantly pick on me so does my 2 sisters and 3 brothers but my mum doesn’t hit me anymore and her boyfriend hasn’t so theirs nothing I can actually do my oldest brother has a few times and he’s locked me in the back garden for hours on nights where my mums gone out and no one believed me except my next door neighbour who asked me once if I wanted too go too hers I said no because I didn’t want any drama with my mum , but I used too speak too the school about my issue - and they called a meeting in with my mum (I had asked them not too) and because I couldn’t stand up too her because I felt intimidated I had too tell the school I had been making it up - the year manager looked at me with pure hatred but my class room manager sor what was really going on but said nothing until she was alone with me the next day , I hate living at home but my only other option is my dads studio flat but theirs only 1 room a kitchen and a toilet and I’m a 14 year old girl and I can’t stay their - I want too Leave but I have no where too go and I don’t know what too do and I can’t take it anymore

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

So I’m 14 and we just got a puppy recently. She has trouble with training but he doesn’t understand that. He has always been mentally and sometimes physically abusive and I don’t know how much more I can take. As I’m typing he is screaming at me telling me how much he can’t wait for me to move out. And honestly I’m ready to move. I don’t know what to do. He constantly calls me useless and a lifeless piece of ********. I’m tired of it and scared.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

Talking to other adult family members or school counselors can be helpful in many situations.

Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. If you would like to talk more in detail please call us at call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. or chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Best,
NRS

[Guest]

I’m 14 and want to move out I tried to give my mom advice on how to care for a squirrel that is dying and how to feed it and she is waiting till Wednesday to give it away and I spent $50 on buying a big enough cage for me and my mom trying to keep him alive and she didn’t tell me she was going to give him to a sanctuary. So I’m overly upset I spent money and tried to keep an animal alive just for my mother to take it somewhere else. And by her having me pay for something she doesn’t want to give effort in is giving up and I don’t believe in giving up on animals.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS

[Guest]

I'm 14 and my parents fight every night, I've been wanting to live with my friends mom because it's my second home, my stepdad drinks every night and he gets drunk abusive and aggressive, I fear that they are going to split up and it has taken such a huge mental toll on me

[ccsmod15]

Hello,

You mentioned some things that raise concern for your safety and well-being. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. It generally ranges from no danger (the youth stays in the home, some services are given, and the case is closed), moderate danger (they will provide family services with possible temporary displacement) and high danger (they will remove the youth from the home and offer certain services).If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

Stay safe!
NRS

[Guest]

im about to be 14 and i dont know what to do, my mom hates me and constantly call me useless, worthless, and that her life would've been better without me. she blames me for her mistakes and i cant stand up for myself because whenever i try to i either get sent out or get hit. i dont know where my dad is and i dont have any friends. all i ever wanted was to make everyone laugh and smile but instead im always the topic of arguments, gossip, and complaints. i know its not true but it feels like the world hates me. whenever i try to talk about my feelings my mom she just denies and dismisses them saying im not allowed to be upset. i dont know whos fault it is but whenever im around no one is happy. i can tell shes never gonna change and my life will be hell if i dont do something. i just want to run away but i dont know where, to im pretty tall and built so i dont think id be the victims of any creeps, but i dont have a phone plan or a map or anything of the sort and im new to the area i live in so i dont know where to go and i keep having breakdowns please help

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

hi. idek where to start, i'm at a point where i don't know what to do. i haven't been considering running away as much as moving out with a few friends that would let me stay over, or my aunt who lives in a near state. my family can be so sweet one day and hell the next. they're homophobic, racist and unsupportive of anything i want to do, even little things like cutting my hair or talking to a friend on the phone. i'm a trapped queer muslim who doesn't wanna wear the hijab (garment muslim women wear over their heads) i'm extremely depressed and i've been turning to bad things like drugs or hooking up with random people to cope. if i came out to them they would ship me off to pakistan to be trapped for the rest of my life. i'm trying to focus on school but my mom takes credit for everything and doesn't even let me study in my own room. the only reason my mom signed me up with a therapist is bc child services had to come to our house twice, and even then she keeps making excuses. i'm drained and have been trying to make this work for years but i just want to leave. i understand running away doesn't solve things but they say they hate me and call me their curse, so i don't think they'd care if i left.

[ccsmod15]

Hello,

Thank you for reaching out to us. We’re so sorry to hear that things at home have been so difficult. It sounds like you’ve struggled to be yourself at home, and you feel that living elsewhere might be a better option for you. You’ve brought up several important points about where you might stay and why would explore living away from your family, and we hope that we can share some information that might help you decide your next steps.

Having a safe place to stay is a great first step, and it sounds like you feel like you have a few friends and family that would support you if you did choose to leave. Possible repercussions for leaving depend on whether you’re considered a minor in your state. If you are a minor and you’d like to move out, the easiest way to do so is with the consent with your parent or legal guardian. We are not legal experts, but from what we understand, if you are considered a minor and you choose to leave without the consent of your parent or legal guardian, they have the right to report a runaway report with your local police department. What happens after they file a report depends on your local police department, and because of this, we often encourage anyone looking for more information to contact your local police department at their non-emergency number. If you’d like to find resources in your area with whom you can talk to about any LGBT –related concerns, organizations like LGBT National Hotline are also available to support you. You can reach them by phone at 1.888.843.4564 and by visiting https://www.glbthotline.org/ . Whatever you decide, please know that we are here to support you.

We recognize that asking for help and trying to figure out your next steps can be truly challenging. Please feel free to reach out to us if you’d like more information, or even if you just want someone to talk to. We can’t tell you what to do, but we will always do our best to help you stay safe as you explore your options. You can reach us 24/7 by phone at 1.800.RUNAWAY (786.2929) or via chat. We’re here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!

-NRS

[Guest]

My mother and me fight almost everyday and its manly my brother who causes me and my mom to fight and its so much stress on me and school doesn't help and i want to move with other family members so i can get comfortable and get away and relax and of course im going to do school but i wont have a brother who bothers me.

[ccsmod6]

Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We’re sorry to hear that your brother is causing things to be so difficult between you and your mom. It must not be easy for you to live in such an intense and stressful environment. We would be happy to talk to you about what options you might have and how you might be able to get closer to living with your other family members.

If you would like to continue this conversation, please give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat with us at 1800runaway.org.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I want to run away but don’t know how. I have a good family and they are also nice and loving but they aren’t the problem it’s school. I’m so depressed after something that happened a year ago and have been depressed most of my life and I don’t want to go to school but I have to and it’s nothing to do with my family and I don’t want to make them sad but I just can’t deal with school. What do I do?

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

I want to go live with my mom my dad say he going ro beat me and stuff

I wanto leave my dads to my mom how do i get help

[ccsmod4]

Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You don’t deserve to be threatened by your father with physical violence. It’s not your fault that he said that to you. We understand your concern. You might consider letting your mother know what’s going on.

We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi, I'm 14 years old and I want to move out of my parents and move into My cousin's apartment. My parents lie and steal from me, my Parents make me watch my 2 sisters 12 days straight, I never get breaks. Any time I want to do something like go somewhere or something like that its always no. But Tey can leave and stay out till 4 am and it's ok. Also, my parents fight at least 3 times a month and I guess cause I am the oldest they think that they can talk behind each other back to me about it and it will be ok. Well, this last time they fought My mom said that their marriage was over, and then after my selfish dad left she started talking all this mess. I wake up the next morning and all his stuff is In the front room. And on top of it all my dad threatens me, Yesterday he told me that if I even had a spec of sarcasm was going to slap the s h I t out of me. Then he threatened to take away my shoes which I only have 3 pairs of shoes and he threatened to take those away. Also, my dad went to jail for 7 years and he comes out and starts dealing drugs and gets my mom into it. I love my siblings but between Watching my sisters, making sure I don't get slapped, and making everyone happy it's hard and sometimes its to much.

[ccsmod4]

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
It sounds like you’re fearing that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
Having your parent’s fight and do things that are unsafe for you and your siblings must be upsetting and frustrating.
Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.
NRS is here to listen and here to help.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

You are welcome to discuss your situation and talk about possible options for help. What you did today by reaching out was great. Good job.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I'm almost 14 and I want to move out. My parents are divorced and my dad has full custody and I haven't been able to see my mom since May. He said that he was waiting for a court date because he thinks she shouldn't get to see us anymore. My dad just expects way too much from me. I get good grades and I am well behaved with good manners. I've made a couple of tiny mistakes and I have no privacy now or any time to be a kid. Over quarantine I said one comment to my dad (which I normally never do) and got my door taken off. He went through my underwear door and took out all of my "sexy" underwear. He went through my stuff again and took over half of my jeans and shirts saying that they were too inappropriate. At one point he took all my leggings and jeans away and forced me to wear the same sweatpants to school everyday. Every time I think about him I just want to hurt myself because he is the one person that makes me feel like I'm not good enough. He caught me cutting like a year ago and put me into a mental facility which was horrifying. He never pays attention to me and he threatens me all the time saying, "you should be glad that I'm not abusive because I would beat the sh** out of you right now." Last night he went to check and see if I was sleeping and he got mad that my room was messy and punched my door. Waking up my sister. He is insane and I can't live with him for another 4 years of my life. Every time that I try and say my side of the story I'm always "back talking" them and it's not fair. When I go over to friend's houses I see how happy their family is and it makes me feel horrible. Another thing over quarantine, was that I wanted to stay the night at one of my friend's houses and he said that in order for me to go I had to give him my usernames and passwords to all my social media accounts and he signed me out of all of them. Every day I wish that he wasn't my dad and that I'm dreaming. And then other times I hate myself for thinking like this because so many other people have it far worse. I just don't know what to do anymore.

[ccsmod4]

Hi,
Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.
It sounds like you are in a tough situation and may be looking for some options to help cope with everything. We would like to be of assistance to you if we can. It is times like these that would be nice to have a listening ear. It is also important that you remember to exercise self- care. You showed some by reaching out to NRS. Good for you. What you have been going through sounds unfair. You do not deserve to be treated badly by your dad. It’s not your fault that he behaves this way. It sounds like emotionally you may be feeling abused. Your feelings are important and they matter.
You are deserving as anyone that wants to be happy.

We understand how difficult it must have been to speak about what you have been feeling.
You are very brave for doing so. Good for you.
NRS would like you to know we are here to support you at this difficult time.
NRS is here to listen and here to help.
Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

Let us know how we might help, please contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) orwww.1800Runaway.org (live chat).


Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

Did you guys get my post? for aunt and uncle one?

[Guest]

I'm 14 and I don't know what to do in this situation that I put myself in, I've lied to my parents( my parents are my aunt and my uncle they are my legal guardians) a lot of times and this time they told me basically to go outside and think if you want to change or not if you can't than you have to move out with your family out there, and I went back inside and told them I can't change but, I made the worst decision of my life because I can change and I know that and I didn't really think anything through about what would happen if I said I can't change because there's no one that is willing to take me in and I'm actually glad no one will take me because I want to change and I want to stay here and better myself so, i'm going to try to talk to my aunt and uncle tonight and see if they are willing to give me one more chance but, if they say that I've already made my decision and can't go back on it then I'm probably going to runaway today and btw I'm not suicidal but, I'm going to runaway and just go to somewhere they won't find me unless they try maybe( I don't think they will) and just die of dehydration, I don't know what to do can you help me?

[ccsmod15]

Hey there thanks for reaching out,
It seems like you are very worried about your words being taken literally and that your guardians will kick you out because you told them it wouldn’t change. It is understandable to be worried about how they will react and that they will take things really seriously.
However, you mentioned that they are your legal guardians currently which means that if they were to kick you out without an alternative they could face child neglect charges if they did so. Since this is the case they are likely to make a runaway report if you do leave and police would look for you and try to bring you back home. Talking with them does seem like a good idea since you have changed your mind since the last time you talked with them. It might help to come with some readymade ideas for compromise or ways you can change and improve. Having some clear goals can help you to know exactly what is expected and help them know what is reasonable to expect.
If you do end up leaving we want you to know there are ways to stay safe and avoid ending up dehydrated alone somewhere. There are many emergency youth shelters that we can look to see if there is one in your area that your guardians might be able to bring you to if you all can’t come to an agreement.
Again, thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS