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  • Hi, my mom mentally abuses me everyday and one time I stayed out a little later when at a friends sleepover and she tracked me on her phone and yelled at me, unfortunately I was stressed that whole night and couldn’t focus cause I was so terrified of her, now I’m not allowed to have any sleepover for the whole summer, which sucks because I always go to my friends so I don’t have to be with her. I want to runaway but I would never because I’m scared what she’ll do if she ever finds me. No one ever believes me if I tell them about her because she’s so sweet to everyone else, she just takes out her anger at me. I live in Canada so I don’t know if the laws are different here

    Comment


    • Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and we understand it takes courage to reach out for help. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/.
      We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

      Take care,
      NRS
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • Hi, I'm 14 and I'm done with my family. My father just got out of hospital after being winter for a year in critical care. He's gotten back and now acts like he's in control. I talk back to him and get mad at him often. same with my mum. my brother is verbally abusing me, I'm fine with it as I've already said half the things he's said to myself but I can only take so much. I don't want to live with them anymore and I feel like my brother wants me dead (he does). questions-

        - am I allowed to ask my grandma to have legal guardianship over me? (I should be able to make this decision)
        - do I have a say, can I ask to stay somewhere else
        - is there any way I can get away before 18?
        - can I do an exchange in another country at 14 to getaway?

        please, I can't live in my house anymore. I physically and now mentally am over it.
        Last edited by ccsmod4; 07-02-2020, 07:27 AM.

        Comment


        • ccsmod4
          ccsmod4 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello,
          Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

          We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You do not deserve to be abused by anyone. It’s not your fault that your brother is doing this. It sounds like the relationships with family members have been frustrating and upsetting to you. We understand that when things feel overwhelming it’s sometimes difficult to cope with.
          Just so that you know we are not legal experts and only can provide some general legal information.

          Someone under 18 that leaves home without parental consent, the parent/guardian may file them as a runaway and they may be returned home. Also, those that a reported runaway stays with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. Anyone found to be assisting or aiding someone to run away may also find themselves at risk legally. For more specifics on the law, you might consider contacting the local non-emergency number for the police. Again we are not legal experts. Some of the things you are asking may require a court of law.

          If you would like to talk more in detail we are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you.
          Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

          Take care,
          NRS

      • i am 14 years old, my dad hits my brother so much, and he calls us names all the time. i am never allowed to hangout, even though it is so easy. i want to move in with somebody, their parents already said itd be okay, but my parents defintley wont let me. i dont know what to do.

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hey there,
          Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline (NRS) it seems like you and your brother are going through a lot right now and you don’t deserve to be treated that way. It makes sense to want to get out of a violent and scary situation like that.
          Your dad hitting your brother like that likely is physical abuse, and as such could be reported. The name calling and could also qualify as well but can be hard to prove but is still potentially abuse. You and your brother don’t deserve to be treated this way. If you want you could contact child help at 1-800-422-4453 to find out more about child abuse reporting and the process. We can also help you to file an abuse report should you choose to.
          We are here to listen and try and help you through this difficult situation, we are here to explore the situation more and discuss possible other options to help you keep safe. Sometimes just being able to talk about the situation can help things as well. We are available 24/7 to talk at 1-800-786-2929, or online at 1800runaway.org.
          Looking forward to hearing from you again soon,
          NRS.

      • I dont want anyone to know yet but i wanna leave my house i only live with my father in France as my mother stayed in india when my parents separated anyaways thats not the point
        i wanna leave because i dont have enough Freedom and i am Always into fights with my father where he even says his self that until i live Under his roof i have to respect his rules and if i dont want to i can leave now and i know and he doees too that we love each other but i cant take it anymore Everyday its just to heavy to have this atmosphere and even my siblings want me to leave and i know what u r ganna say its normal they dont mean it but trust me they do when i told my brother that i am ganna leave and i wanted him to know he started screaming of hapiness so yeah i want to leave to be own my own and i need Freedom and specially be independant so peole dont need to tell me what to do but specially i dont need to be forced to be the way they want and i need help cause i dont know how i can live on my own before 16 and please dont reply by leagally you cant or call this number or we understand i really need a solution and if not u r not helping me and i have a question if my parents dont report or go to the police could i leave please tell me i can…
        and also i dont wanna go live with my mother cause i would have to change all my life again and its not ganna be better with her cause the problem is me and she also hits me i want Freedom and that i will have much less with her so please help me...thanks…
        i need to move out very soon
        i would want a apartement but i dont have thr money and i could atleast stzy with freinds for a while pleasee…

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thank you for reaching out to NRS and we appreciate you for sharing your situation with us. It sounds like you feeling isolated and not welcome at home because of the way your dad and siblings treat you. It can definitely get stressful and overwhelming living with a strict and controlling parent. You deserve to be treated with respect and to feel cared for.

          We are not here to judge or tell you what you should do, but we do want to make sure you can make informed decisions and stay as safe as possible. Leaving home and becoming independent can be a big decision to make, but you are the expert on what is best for you and your well being. Having a solid plan about what you are planning on doing might be a good idea so that you can think about what will and will not be possible and work for you. Considering certain factors and aspects for your plan might help you make your decisions about your next steps: where are you going to be living, are you going to be working/going to school, how will you financially support yourself, what will you do in case of a medical emergency. Taking this step toward independence can be a huge step to take and we want you to be as safe as possible when making your decision.

          There can be some risks and challenges associated with leaving home at your age. Again, we don't want to tell you what to do or what not do. We just want you to be informed on possible consequences and outcomes so that you can make a solid and safe plan for yourself. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA) so we don't know how to answer your questions about leaving. Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. You can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/. We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

          Good luck and stay safe,
          NRS

      • Hi! I’m 14 and would like to move out. In the past, I’ve struggled with depression, anxiety, and feeling suicidal. I’ve had 1 attempt and was hospitalized for months. That was well over a year ago. Now, I am very emotionally stable. But just because I am, doesn’t mean my parents are. My father (a cop) has major anger issues. He has pushed me, wrapped his hands around my autistic brother’s neck, and bashed his own head through a door. My mother cannot make her own decisions and is very insecure in herself and her self image. They’re marriage is far from healthy, especially with the quarantine. Not only do they fight every day, but at one point, I had to pack the car and tell my mom to leave because we weren’t safe with my dad. I’m constantly talking someone through their problems, or calling the shots on what to do next. you’d think I’d be trusted to have a bit of freedom. But unfortunately that’s far from accurate. It feels like my parents control every aspect of my life. (Yes, I understand that I am a child, but I feel that I am being forced to act like an adult with no respect in return). No matter what I do, I’m always expected to pick up after everyone else, including my 2 younger siblings that I worry about all the time. From my perspective, my parents are too wrapped up in they’re own problems to see the affects they’re having on their own children.

        I can’t tell anyone about my situation because my dad would loose his job and neither of my parents would forgive me. With that being said, I always feel stuck which isn’t a good feeling lol. I just want to feel like a kid, and I’m tired of having to carry weight that isn’t my own. I know for a fact that my aunt would take me in, but i’ve never brought it up to my parents because I’m afraid of their reaction.

        Ive been counting down the days until I turn 18 and can finally move out, but the thought of having to wait 4 more years is unbearably debilitating. I’ll take any advice or references you have to offer. Thank you for caring enough to read to this point, it truly means the world to me

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thank you for writing us here at NRS and we appreciate you sharing your situation with us. It sounds like home has become incredibly overwhelming and you are not getting the support that you deserve. It is not okay at all for your dad to take his anger issues out on you or to become physically violent. Even though it does sound like your mom is also a target for his anger, it is her job to be protecting you and your siblings from a dangerous situation. You have had to grow up very quickly and take on adult responsibilities like having to be the emotional support for family members and clean up after your younger siblings. It is not fair for your parents to place so much responsibility on to you. Home is supposed to be somewhere you feel safe and cared for. We are so sorry that your parents have been failing at this. Your safety and well-being are incredibly important.

          We know it can be very scary and intimidating to make a report to child protective services, but this is an option you have. You mentioned a few things that make us concerned for your safety and you are not in this alone. If you would like to learn more about what the reporting process would look like for you and what could happen, you can speak with an advocate at the National Child Abuse Hotline, childhelp.org. They would have more expert knowledge on how your father being in law enforcement could affect this process and answer any concerns you may have.

          It is very understandable you would want to live with your aunt instead and have an opportunity to get be a kid! We know approaching a conversation like this with parents can be very difficult. Sometimes having an adult get involved to advocate for your needs can make it easier to open up communication. Perhaps you could try reaching out your aunt first about all of this and then she can be the one to talk to your parents for you or with you.

          We also want to make sure you are getting any support or help you may need with your mental health. If you need a safe place to talk about what's going on or if you are having suicidal thoughts, you can speak to a counselor 24/7 at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

          We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

          Stay strong,
          NRS
          Last edited by ccsmod13; 07-09-2020, 05:37 PM.

      • I am 14 and I've been wanting to lk ove out as well, I have friends that will take me at any cost. my parents are so demanding and controlling and always yelling at me. like they have an app on my phone where they can block apps and I have to ask for apps so they can decline the request or accept it. and they even blocked snapchat off of my phone and idk why. they put limits on my apps and my phone. I can never even go see my friends without getting yelled at or my phone getting locked. and I feel as if I deserve to have a normal teenage life. I'm not even allowed to date. one of my very very close friends said that I could go with him to north Carolina in a couple years. my parents wont even let me switch schools and I came out as bi a while ago to my mom and ever since I've been treated a lot worse. and I have an older sister she is 16, she has a job and hangs out with friends and everything and is treated so kindly but the other day I was downstairs in my room doing my laundry and cleaning up and my dad came down and yelled at me for no reason at all. he said that I need to stop sitting in my room all day but all I was doing was cleaning and getting things done that are supposed to be done. they give me so much stress and anxiety. and I recently lost my best friend to suicide and they dont know and it has been very very hard on me. I'm just ready to leave. I need to go. I want the life I deserve. and I do not deserve to be locked up in a house all day getting yelled at and being controlled. but idk what to do. I just wanna go

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hey there, thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline,

          Your story is important and matters to us. It seems like you are in a difficult situation where you feel oppressed by your parent’s rules and their constant yelling. It seems like they are taking phone privileges, and social media access, away to either punish you or prevent you from unsafe situations. That alone might be reasonable, however it seems like they still will yell at you rather than have a proper discussion about other issues. You mentioned as well that this has all escalated after you came out as bisexual to your mom as well. You don’t deserve to be treated like that, especially for just wanting to be who you really are. We are also sorry for the loss of your best friend to suicide. That is a difficult thing to cope with, and it seems like you aren’t receiving much support from your family, like you deserve.

          There are some options for finding more support for the difficult situation you are going through. The first is NAMI.org that specializes in mental health. They can be a good resource for coping with the grief of losing your friend. They may also be able to help you through the frustrations you are going through because of your parents as well.

          There is also specific help for LGBT youth out there so you can get resources for dealing with how your mom has been treating you since you came out. There are a couple of LGBT focused lines, the first is glbthotline.org (LGBT National Hotline) and the other is only by phone at 1-800-246-7743 (LGBT National youth talkline).

          As for leaving home, we are not legal experts but generally leaving without permission before 18 is a status offence. This means your parents can file a runaway report and police would look for you and try to bring you back home. Additionally those that help you to run away or let you stay with them could face legal consequences for harboring a runaway. If you wanted another option for a place to go without your friends being at risk we can help you to find a shelter near you or you can check out the nationalsafeplace.org for safe places near you.

          We hope this information is helpful for you to make a decision. If you have more questions or just need to vent about your parents we are here to listen and help. You can reach us directly anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY or by online chat at 1800runaway.org.

      • I’ve always had issues with my mom and I’m not good enough and she doesn’t accept me being trans my family talks with her so I can’t go with them I need to move out fast and bad I just wanna go somewhere else I can’t take much more if it

        Comment


        • ccsmod13
          ccsmod13 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thank you for contacting us here at NRS and we appreciate you sharing a bit about your situation. It is not okay that your mom makes you feel as if you are unwanted or not good enough. You deserve to experience acceptance and to feel supported at home. It is understandable you would be feeling overwhelmed and like you need to leave.

          Leaving as a minor can be challenging since your mom is legally responsible for you until you turn 18. A helpful start could be to reach out to friends or other trusted adults you might be able to stay with. Sometimes having a safe place to talk about your situation can help you brainstorm options you might not have previously thought of. Perhaps a friend's parent or other adult can help you talk to your mom about leaving and advocate for your needs. You deserve to feel heard.

          Additionally, there is another resource that can offer you support during this challenging time. The Trevor Project (thetrevorproject.org) is a crisis line specifically for LGBTQ youth. You can speak with a crisis counselor and connect with other people your age who may share similar experiences. Having a support system is very important during difficult situations. You are not alone in this.

          We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

          Stay safe,
          NRS

      • Hi, im 14, wanna leave, i love my parents but don't like them, its been a year since i last spoke with my dad, and my mom clearly doesn't like me, she cares about money and men only, i wanna leave, ik i cant till im 16 here, but i need to leave now, or imma end up running away, only reply if you guys can ACTUALLY help me, like idk, get me out of the house... If not don't even bother responding

        Comment


        • ccsmod0
          ccsmod0 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,
          Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
          While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
          The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
          We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
          Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
          If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
          Be safe,
          NRS

      • Im tired of my mom we are always fighting she doesn’t love me and she says you are stupid and that you are good for nothing so I wanna move out and make her **********ass life easier and mine more free I’m planning on going to London but I’m 14 and can’t buy a ticket someone help I hate my life everyone hates me and my mom doesn’t love me she always says I’m going to put you in a mental hospital and her sisters encourage her today I didn’t get her phone when someone was calling her and so her sister had to get it but then she passed it to me and my the time she passed it to me the person already hanged up then after a few seconds later they where calling me lazy btw i only heard the phone but I didn’t see it/ then after a few seconds her sister he mental you got to put him in a mental hospital and ******** and I kept saying it’s not my fault the person hanged up and also I couldn’t see the phone either only heard the ringing ok so back to the mental thing then I started arguing with them and her sister said you don’t know nothing you are not worth nothing

        Comment


        • ccsmod7
          ccsmod7 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there, Thank you for contacting to National Runaway Safeline.

          It sounds like you’re feeling unloved and unsupported by your mother as well as other family members. We imagine it must feel very isolating but you are not alone, as we are here to help and acknowledge your bravery for reaching out for help. You mention that your mom tells you that you are unloved and is verbally abusive to you. You have the right to live in an environment where you are supported and validated as an individual with worth. In addition to us here at NRS, Childhelp is an organization that provides support to adolescents who are in abusive relationships at home or with anyone else. Childhelp can be reached at childhelp.org or you may call them at (800) 422-4453. Sometimes talking things over with someone will help of solutions you haven’t previously thought of. We here at NRS are available to talk on the phone at 800-786-2929 or to chat at www.1800runaway.org. We can provide supportive services in your area based on what you think would be most helpful Also, if you ever want to talk with your mom about these issues but feel hesitant, we are available to conference call with your mom and you and get the conversation opened up. Either way, we are here for you and do hope to hear from you.

          Stay strong and safe.

          NRS

      • Hi I'm 14 and I want to move out. Me and my family were in a domestic relationship with my dad so my mom divorced him. We now live in her boyfriends house. His house is very old and dirty. He yells at my brothers and is a little to close to my older sister. Him and my mom are almost never here and we often have no food. I dont want to end up like my sister they kicked out, she is a drug addict. I am turning

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,
          Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It makes sense to want to take steps to protect yourself from following in the steps of your sister. It seems like the house is chaotic and unstable as well. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
          While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
          Generally if there is a lack of food in the house that could be considered as neglect and abuse. It can be harder to prove neglect, or emotional abuse as compared to physical abuse but it is still abuse. If you want more information about what might be abuse you can go to https://www.childhelp.org/. We can also help you to file an abuse report should you decide that is the best option for you.
          We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
          Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
          If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
          Be safe,
          NRS

      • Hi I’m 14 and I want to leave my house. I am constantly being screamed at for nothing. My parents treat both of my younger syblings way better and it’s awful. They make me feel suicidal and I’m tired of it. I have no where to go and I don’t want to tell them because the one time I had an anxiety attack in front of them they yelled at me instead of helping and it hurt. Please help idk what to do.

        Comment


        • ccsmod1
          ccsmod1 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hey there,

          Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. You deserve to be treated with respect and shouldn't be screamed at.

          You mentioned that your parents make you feel suicidal and that you've had an anxiety attack in the past. We care a lot about your safety, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time. If you’d like some additional support, an organization that may be helpful is the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). You can contact them by calling 1-800-950-NAMI or you can text them by sending NAMI to 741741.

          It takes a lot of bravery to open up to your parents and it's frustrating that they did not react appropriately. Sometimes it can be beneficial to have a third party with you when speaking with your parents as they can help advocate for you. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your parents so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

          If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

          Stay safe,
          NRS

          We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

      • Hi, I'm 14 and I want to leave. My mom and dad hate each other so I feel torn apart. My mom kicked me out when I was 12 and I've been living with my dad ever since. My dad treats me like I'm an idiot and he won't help me with anything. He does stuff for me but it feels like he just does it to make me want to stay there. I feel unwanted and I told them I wanted them to give me away so I can hopefully go somewhere where people want me. I went to the library to type this up for some advice on what to do. I used to be scared to say I was being abused but when I tried to leave yesterday to go to the police station, my dad started choking me out and only let me go because his wife asked him to. There's no way I'm staying there so I asked them to give me away. This is a huge decision and I just need some advice.

        Comment


        • ccsmod15
          ccsmod15 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there, Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. It sounds you are in a really painful situation but you are not alone and we are here to help. You have the right to live in an environment where you are respected and feel safe. You mentioned that your dad was choking you but we want you to know that physical violence is never okay. We encourage you to call 9-11 if you ever feel unsafe or threatened. Also, www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how Child Protective Services could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY. Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) or give us a call. Stay safe and strong, NRS
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