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I'm 14 and I want to move out

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  • I'm 14 and I've been wanting to leave for about 5-6 years, my mother is so scary all be does is scream and yell and picks apart everything me and my sister do but my brother she's lovesssss him sheets him do whatever he wants even when he's being an a$$hole. But say I folded laundry wrong, she would scream and yell at me and probably hit me with the broom and tell me what a disappointment I am and I just can't take it anymore I want to leave so so so bad I can't stand being here anymore. Please help me.

    Comment


    • ccsmod9
      ccsmod9 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for contacting NRS. We know that you are going through some really hard times and we are sorry that you are going through them. If you are trying to get help please know that you can reach out to us and we can help report the abuse. As far as running away from home the legal age of becoming an adult is 18. If you are under 18 and runaway it Is not illegal for you to runaway but your parents have the right to file a runaway report and have the police look for you. Anyone who houses you might be charged with harboring a runaway.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

      Be safe,
      NRS

  • I want to be in a different family because my mom rather listen to grandma more than me and Everytime I tried to explain she never listen

    Comment


    • ccsmod16
      ccsmod16 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi,
      Thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did.

      It is difficult and frustrating to not be listened to when we try to explain things. It sounds like your mom listens to your grandma more than you and that is really hard. It’s understandable to feel like you want to be in a different family.

      One thing you might consider is writing a letter to your mom so that you can explain in your own words and in your own time.

      We are also here to talk about other options that you may have to be able to communicate with your mom. We hope you might reach out to us at 1800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY) or through live chat via www.1800runaway.org We are here for you 24/7 to listen and help.
      Sincerely,
      NRS

  • I don't like my mom when she gets onto me about the smallest mistakes, she keeps giving me chores for 2 weeks even if I just talk to her nicely. Of course I chores get done even if she doesn't ask me, but sometimes she tells me to do them when they don't need it completely. She thinks I'm incredibly annoying and I don't try at all to be annoying to her or anyone. She's 49 I'm 14. No she doesn't drink. She even loves to irritate me. She's riding on a excuse as an adult. I can't stand it when she yells at me for the simplest things. It scares the heck out of me. (Not all the time). I know she loves me, but it is stressful for me as a son. My dad is perfectly sane, he is an awesome dad he doesn't punish me when I don't deserve it. I'm tired of this repetitive thing that has going on. I hope I can go somewhere safe. Writing to you from crowleys ridge cutoff - Arkansas. I need a safe place. I can sneak easily, but need to reconsider this thought. Please help.---Jacob

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,
      Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a really tough time right now.
      Having to do chores can be annoying and frustrating at times. One option to consider is coming up with a compromise when it comes to doing chores. For example you could try having a chore chart and once chores are completed you get to do something you enjoy doing whether that is playing outside or eating a snack. It is great you seem like you have a good relationship with your father. An option to consider is seeing if your dad would be able to talk with your mother and help advocate for you.
      You mentioned wanting a safe place to go to, although we are not legal experts we do have some information on the laws. If you were to leave without permission your legal guardian does have the right to file a runaway report on you. If the police do find you they most likely would bring you back home. Also most shelters would contact CPS or your legal guardian. If you are still in need of a shelter or a safe place give us a call or chat with us online and we can try and help you.
      We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options, please give us a call. We are here to help and here to listen. We wish you the best of luck!
      NRS

  • I'm 14 and I've wanted to move out for a while she takes all her anger out on me and i don't really have any friends and no one would take me. i find myself crying everyday and anytime i tell her that i need professional help like a therapist or something she tells me that i'm fine but i know that i'm not fine. she always yells at me then ask me what's wrong. she thinks i'm getting bullied or something but it's her, and i don't know what to do anymore i want to leave badly but i have no where to go and i have no money. She doesn't listen to me but wants me to listen to her problems i just hate it

    Comment


    • ccsmod7
      ccsmod7 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there, thanks for reaching out.

      Sounds like you are really going through a lot at home, and your mom is not hearing your needs. That cannot be easy to go through, and you crying everyday is significant, you deserve to be supported when you are feeling like that.

      If you haven't already, you might try to tell a supportive adult in your life how you are feeling, such as a grandparent, teacher or family friend. It can help to have an adult your mom listens to advocate for your needs when she is not hearing you. If you would like to have a mediated call with your mom so you can let her know how you are feeling without being interrupted, please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY and we can facilitate that for you. We also have a national database of counseling resources and resources for youth in crisis if you are ever interested in local resources.

      Please do not hesitate to call or chat us if you would like to talk through your situation with us. We are always here for you.

      Best,

      NRS

  • Also my mom tells me i can never do anything write you can't tell that someone that is emotionally hurt. it just kills me inside that i can' t as perfect as she wants me to be because i actually try my best and she is basically saying my best sucks

    Comment


    • ccsmod7
      ccsmod7 commented
      Editing a comment
      That has to be so hurtful to hear. Here at NRS, we want you to know that you are enough despite your mom's hurtful words. You do not need to be that kind of perfect, you are you and that is more than enough.

      Please see our response to your other post:

      "Hi there, thanks for reaching out.

      Sounds like you are really going through a lot at home, and your mom is not hearing your needs. That cannot be easy to go through, and you crying everyday is significant, you deserve to be supported when you are feeling like that.

      If you haven't already, you might try to tell a supportive adult in your life how you are feeling, such as a grandparent, teacher or family friend. It can help to have an adult your mom listens to advocate for your needs when she is not hearing you. If you would like to have a mediated call with your mom so you can let her know how you are feeling without being interrupted, please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY and we can facilitate that for you. We also have a national database of counseling resources and resources for youth in crisis if you are ever interested in local resources.

      Please do not hesitate to call or chat us if you would like to talk through your situation with us. We are always here for you.

      Best,

      NRS"

  • I'm actually 13 and want to move out my mom blames me for everything and hates when I talk to my boyfriend but if this continues I will leave at 15

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,
      Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline we are here to help and here to listen.
      It sounds like you are going through a difficult time right now, and we want you to know that you are not alone. One option to consider is to talk with a school counselor about what is going on at home and they may be able to provide resources and support.
      We are not legal experts but we do have some knowledge on the laws if you were to leave your home, because you are a minor your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If the police do find you they most likely would bring you back home. If you do decide to leave and need a safe place to stay please call us and we can try and help you.
      We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options, please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support we wish you the best of luck!
      NRS

  • im a 14 year old and this is gonna sound crazy but i wanna get away from my grandma (i cant live with my mom or dad) im from louisiana and id like to go to texas because i know that i have a friend there that i truly trust and that i could live with him, but my grandma doesnt know about him. shes abused me and i went to about 5 mental hospitals. what can i do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod16
      ccsmod16 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,
      Thanks for reaching out to NRS today.
      It sounds like things are really tough at home. It’s understandable that you’d be frustrated with your mom for blaming you for things that aren’t your fault and for not letting you talk to your boyfriend without getting mad. You definitely deserve to be taken seriously. We’re so sorry it’s gotten to the point that you’d consider leaving your home.
      Running away is a big decision. There’s a lot to consider before you take off. Running away isn’t illegal, but you could be reported to the police as a run away and they may return you home if they find you. Sometimes the person you stay with could be in trouble with the law if you are found with them. There’s a lot of things to think about and we can help you get these things sorted out.
      We’re here to help you in any way we can. Please consider giving us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY or take a Live Chat right here on this site. We won’t judge or tell you what to do, we’re here to help and we’re here to listen.
      Best,
      NRS

  • sick of this ********, im 14 and i have a job, i want to move out

    Comment


    • ccsmod4
      ccsmod4 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
      It sounds like you are feeling frustrated with things at home. NRS is here to listen and here to help.
      We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      We hope to hear from you soon.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • hello im 14 and my grandmother has custody over me and shes rude to me everyday, yells at me for dumb things like, telling the dog to go lay down, wanting to go to my friends house, wanting to see my mom, playing video games, having a opinion, asking to do things. she has called the cops on me and sent me to the DH for " being disrespectful" she threatens to call the cops anytime we get into a disagreement,and im tired of it and i do not know what to do

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there. We are sorry to hear you are having a rough time at home with your grandmother. It sounds like you feel you aren't being treated respectfully. Of course, you have the right to be heard and to express your feelings without being responded to rudely. We never tell anyone what to do, but here are some options for you to consider: writing her a letter explaining how you feel, talking to another adult you feel comfortable with and getting their help in talking to her, staying out of her way if you think she's in a bad mood, or other ways of changing up the communication between you and her for the better. Of course, even if it's not your fault, lashing back at her will only make things worse. One tactic that really helps a lot of people is to try to de-escalate the situation: if things start to get tense just see if you can intentionally lower your voice or see if you can excuse yourself for a bit till tensions die down. You know your situation best, so we can't presume to know what will work for you. But these are just some ideas.

      One way we can help is if you give us a call. We can talk about what you are going through to explore the situation more and help you figure out what your best options are. Just so you know, we are confidential and honor all our callers. We are a safe place to talk about things and are here 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY. Or you can chat with us via the portal on our website: www.1800runaway.org.

      Best of luck,

      NRS
      Last edited by ccsmod15; 03-28-2020, 05:51 PM.

  • I'm 14 years old and I need to get out of my house! I feel unsafe where I am and I have somewhere about an hour away from my house (a little more by bus) where my parents wouldn't be able to find me. The past couple of years I have thought about getting an emancipation but I don't know how I would be able to do that with my parents breathing down my neck. Me and my sister have in fact run away a couple of times, once brought back by the police in the middle of the night and the other was just for a day to get out of the house. I specifically feel unsafe because of a few things that have continued to happen to me over the years. One of them being me thinking I can change in my room with privacy, but then my dad walks in while I'm naked and I tell him to leave but he doesn't and I tell him that it makes me feel unsafe and uncomfortable but he continues to walk towards me, I managed to get at least something on before I resist his grip. But, then he shoved me onto the bed and proceeds to tell me that I don't have any rights and that he can do whatever he wants to me whenever he wants. Another instance being, actually the other night I went to go get some ice cream and my mom said that I could, so I started to walk upstairs and she started to scream at me, and I knew that she had a bad day but I still didn't feel like it was okay. So, I put the ice cream down and went up to my room and my mom stomped up the stairs. I didn't feel very safe so I went to the other side of the room. Some stuff went down and I now have marks on my body where she broke the skin and I told her to stop and that she was making me feel unsafe but she proceeded to do what she was doing. I also feel like I have not been supported mentally because my parents forced me to go to a school that they knew was horrible for my mental health just because they thought that its would just be whatever and they didn't care. I ended up wanting to kill myself because it was such a horrible school but they continue to believe that it's a perfect fit. I already made a plan on how I would run away and survive without them and I have saved up a couple hundred dollars babysitting to get me going so that I can leave and I already got accepted to work at a Market where I want to move to and I have a way to get there and I have an expenses plan and I just don't know if I should do it because I know how mad my parents will be when they figure it all out, and especially if I confront them about it. And, I also worry about my sister and my brother and what they will think. Though, I have always felt like and proven that I would be able to make it on my own and that I don't need their help if they gave me any. Does anyone have any advice for me on what I should do in this situation?
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 04-03-2020, 07:02 AM.

    Comment


    • ccsmod4
      ccsmod4 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

      From everything that you have been going through at home with your parent’s it took a lot of courage for you to reach out. We appreciate you sharing your feelings about the situation. Well done. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed and have thought about harming yourself. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      For depression or suicidal thoughts you might consider contacting the National Suicide and Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

      Again you do not deserve to be abused physically, emotionally by your mother and father. We understand having feelings about your privacy and safety.
      It is not your fault that this is happening. You cannot control what others choose to do.
      Though you are thinking about running away,seeking help is also option available to you.

      To report any abusive treatment there is Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone trustworthy to care for you.

      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We are limited as to how we can help in this type of forum.

      If you would like to talk more in detail please call 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in.

      Be safe,
      NRS

  • I am almost 14 and home to me definitely does not feel like home I don’t want to make its sound like I can’t handle life or I have depression because that is NOT the case and I don’t want to use those terms just to get attention. What I really want to know is if there is a way I can contact someone to help get me out of my mom and dads house. I usually go to my aunts on the weekend to get a break of all the frustration, my parents are not together they haven’t been for a long time but they are both always stressed out and I have a hard time in school and on top of that I have two different homes that I go to and when I’m at either one I’ve got a miserable parent that argues with me about everything I have to say and I’m sick and tired of not being able to be a kid and having to act like I’m 20 years old, they want me to act like and adult and when I act like one I don’t ever get treated like one so... main reason of all of this is because I know what’s best for me more than anyone else and that thing that’s best for me is to not live with either of my parents. That doesn’t mean I don’t care about my family or I don’t love them because I do it’s just I rather only have to see them for like 3 hours a day and then move on, if you want me to be honest I would be fine only seeing each parent like 2 or 3 times a week or every other week I don’t care I just want to find a way to get out. I plan on going to the marines as soon as I graduate but my home life isn’t easy and I know I’d be way better off if I lived somewhere else. My future life matters to me and I want to do what’s best for me now that I’m young so I’m in good shape when I’m out of school. Thank you and I hope you can give me some help/advice on how to get myself out of these two different houses

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,
      Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a lot right now.
      Having to always go from one house to another can be extremely frustrating and overwhelming. We want you to know that you are not alone we are here to help you the best we can. Having all these feelings can be rough you could consider talking to a school counselor or a therapist about what you are going through. They may be able to provide you with options and resources to help with your situation.
      One option to consider is talking with your parents about possibly staying at your aunts long term. Maybe if you all could come to an agreement that would be helpful. We are not legal experts but we do have some information on the laws. If you were to leave without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If the police were to find you they most likely would bring you back home.
      We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any more questions or would like to explore options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support.
      Best of luck!
      NRS

  • Hey I'm 15 and I wanna go live with my sister she doesn't live that far I could probably runaway and get there on foot. I have three siblings but that are all grown and moved out I'm the only one left. My moms in jail and my dads always yelling at me saying he cant stand me and hes always threatening me and throwing stuff at me. All my friends say I should leave but im scared of him. He hits me and always is verbally abuseing me. How can I go live with my sister? She doesnt live far away

    Comment


    • ccsmod13
      ccsmod13 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      It takes a lot of bravery to reach out for help and to share about your situation. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you with figuring out your next steps in this difficult situation. Asking for help was really responsible and smart of you. From what you shared it sounds like your dad is making home feel unsafe, so it is understandable to contemplate running away.

      If you leave without permission, your dad can report you as a runaway. Running away is not illegal, but it is a status offense. This means your dad can ask police to return you home. In the event that this happens, you can tell police that you left because home is not safe. This would likely prompt them to open an investigation with child protective services.


      Two ways you could live with your sister are to either leave with your dad's permission or to get child protective services involved. We know that having these conversations with parents can be very difficult and challenging. Sometimes having another person involved as a mediator can make sure the conversation stays calm and focused. Perhaps you can talk with your sister about making a plan to have a conversation with your dad about you living with her instead. She can be their to advocate for your needs. This also something we can help with as well. We offer conference calling where can talk with your dad with you to ensure your voice is heard.

      You do have the option to report not feeling safe at home. Making an abuse report, would get a social worker involved to help you. If child protective services decides that living with your dad is not safe, there is a possibility they would let you live with your sister instead. You can speak with an advocate at Child Help to learn more about the reporting process, 1-800-422-4453; childhelp.org.

      We truly want to be a support for you as you decide on your next steps. We are available 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. Please do not hesitate to reach out again by phone or chat if you would like to talk more in-depth about your situation and explore your options. You can contact us by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our live chat services at www.1800runaway.org.

      Stay safe,
      NRS

  • Ok so like every other 14yr old here I want to move out I can say that my life has always been like this I’ve always hated my mom and deep down I’ve felt like she’s hated me too but one thing that may be different between me and these kids is I’ve also wanted a way out of life it’s been like this for a while there’s nothing anyone can do for me I’m not the happy type I’m always alone and never rlly talk to anyone I prefer to be alone but when I met my best friend she was my way out I was actually happy for once but that didn’t last long what I can say is that I still want to leave my house but I just want some advice on how to handle this situation in a proper manner how to not want to die but also how to leave bc soon enough I’m gonna lose myself more than I have since before I can even remember that’s all I ask for but I know none of that will happen and that I will always be this way bc there’s not one person or place that can help me so I don’t even rlly know why I’ve taken this time to even type this but even though I’m not happy and may want to die I hope that some of you whet what you want but for some of us that doesn’t happen

    Comment


    • ccsmod1
      ccsmod1 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there,

      Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. It can be really hard to feel like it isn't possible to get what you want and we want to assure you that things will get better.

      You mentioned a few times throughout your post that you may want to die. We care a lot about your safety, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time.

      It seems like there's been a long history of hurt feelings between you and your mom and it must be really exhausting to feel this way for so long. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your mom so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

      If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

      We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

      Stay safe,
      NRS

  • ima kill myself

    Comment


    • ccsmod9
      ccsmod9 commented
      Editing a comment
      We appreciate you sharing your feelings about the situation. Well done.
      It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed and have thought about harming yourself.
      We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe,
      we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      For depression or suicidal thoughts you might consider contacting the National Suicide and Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of.
      You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
      We are limited as to how we can help in this type of forum.

      If you would like to talk more in detail please call 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in.

      Be safe,
      NRS

  • im 14 and i want to leave my home so much.i have a friend who wants to take me i and wants me to live with them. i dont want my family to find me and where i am i just want to be safe and usally i dont feel safe at home.my mom treats my four siblings better than me and prases them.i get treated like crap and get yelled at all the time. A few months ago i was very suicidal and then got help but now i feel the same way now but i dont really want to die just my family makes me feel like a buden.my dads never home but at night when he is he starts to drink and if i did something wrong during the day and he find out he thratens to beat me.i dont wanna die and i want my family to be happy.i dont know where to go

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,
      Thank you for reaching out to us here at The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a lot right now, and we want you to know that you are not alone.
      It is unfortunate that you do not feel safe at home, if you are in immediate danger please call 911. You do not deserve to be threatened and if you feel this could be emotional abuse you do have the right to make an abuse report. You can do this by calling Child Help at: 1800-422-4453. They would be able to help you with filing an abuse report. You can also call or chat with us and we can help with filing an abuse report.
      We know you mentioned suicide and we want you to know that you are valuable and you are worth living. If you feel you need help, don’t be afraid to ask. If you are ever feeling suicidal you can call The National Suicide Prevention Line at: 1800-273-8255. You can also call them if you just need someone to talk to. There is always someone willing to listen and provide support.
      We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. Best of luck!
      NRS
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