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Want to live with my sister illegally and to do that i need to runaway

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  • Want to live with my sister illegally and to do that i need to runaway

    hi, i'm jasmine and i live in oklahoma.
    my sister lives in Hollywood, California. we've planned out that i will runaway to her house this year in July. i was gonna leave my grandmas in the middle of the night and catch a train to california. but my grandma doesn't want to give up guardianship. i have all my legal documents and stuff, so i can get medical and plus i'm native american. i just want to know what will happen if my grandma calls the cops when she wakes up and i'm gone. i'll already be half way to california. i'm gonna leave my grandma a letter, we want to get guardianship when i get there. i'll be turning 16 in august, so i'll be able to choose where i want to live... right? i just need help, big time. i want to go, but i hate doing it illegally and i don't want my sister to get a kidnapping charge. what should we do?

  • #2
    Hello #1,
    Thank you for taking the time to write to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you and your sister have given a considerable about of thought into you coming to live with her. You mentioned that you want to have custody transferred to her once you arrive there. While we are not legal experts but running away to your sister’s house could make the possibility of her legally obtaining guardianship more difficult. It seems like you are well aware of things that you might need when leaving and what might happen but we want to give you some more information.
    We need you to know that we are not legal experts but to our knowledge the age of majority in most states is 18. This means that your parents are responsible for you until 18 and you cannot live anywhere without their permission. If you do leave home then they do have the right to file you as a runaway. Running away is not a crime it is a status offence (something that only a minor can get in trouble for: truancy, buying cigarettes, etc.) this means that if you have any interaction with the police they will simply return you home. On the other hand the people that you are found to be staying with could face legal consequences that vary depending on your state. You can find out more about how runaway’s reports are carried out by contacting your local police department. If you would like we could contact your local non-emergency number for you or with you. We say this because to our knowledge, your right of choosing where to live is limited until you turn at least 17.
    We are not telling you this so talk you out of, or into running away we just want to give you the most information possible so that you can make the best decision for yourself.
    Again, thank you for reaching out and we hope you found this information helpful. If you need anything else please give us a call anytime. 1-800-786-2929




    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Im not running away. My mom has custody of me here in New York but i want to go with my older sister im Rhode island to finish high school there since i can graduate earlier but my mom doesnt know whether she has to register me there or if my sister can since i will be living with her to finish school and shes 26 my sister.

      Comment


      • ccsmod7
        ccsmod7 commented
        Editing a comment
        Thank you for reaching out to us. We appreciate your desire to want to graduate early. This show that you are motivated and goal driven and are able to make plans to achieve those goal.

        The laws vary from state to state and we are not legal experts here. This could even be just a matter of the Rhode Island’s school’s policies. Has your sister or mother attempted to contact the school to determine what the registration requirements are? How old you are may also play a role in whether you can register. Your mom can give your sister temporary guardianship of you; which is something that would not take away her parental rights, but could help you enroll in school.

        Again, we are glad you reached out to us. It can take a lot to open up and ask others for help when you are trying to figure out your situation. If you would like to talk further about your situation please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We are here to listen, here to help.

    • #4
      My sister is 21 and she lives in Louisiana. I’m from there and I really miss home to the point of me being depressed. I live with my dad in Colorado. If my dad says no to me living with her, is there anyway I still can? I’m 17.

      Comment


      • #5
        Reply: My sister is 21 and she lives in Louisiana.


        Hello,
        Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

        We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. 18 years old is generally the age that an individual may leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian. We are not legal experts here but we can speak in general terms. If you are under 18 and leave home without permission, your parent/guardian may file a runaway report with the police. Once a report is filed you could be detained by the police until your parent or guardian can be contacted.
        Also, those that a reported runaway stays with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. Anyone found to be assisting or aiding someone to run away may also find themselves at risk legally. For more specifics on the law, you might consider contacting the local non-emergency number for the police. You might also look for a legal aid center in the area. They may be able to answer any legal questions on the subject.

        NRS is here to listen and here to help.
        We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

        Take care,
        NRS

        We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #6
          Hi, I’m 16. When I was younger I was legally adopted by my aunt and uncle. When I was younger my aunt and I got song perfectly fine, but for the past couple years she’s been really hard on me and is emotionally abusive to me. I ty my best to ignore it but she is such a hateful person and puts others down to make herself feel better. I’ll be 17 in August and I want to figure out a different living situation and possibly live with my sister who is 21 but I don’t know how to leave without getting in trouble with the state and putting my other siblings in a place to be taken away by the state because I chose to leave. I have my own job and already pay for EVERYTHING myself so I don’t see why it would be much different to live with my sister but I know my aunt won’t agree to let me leave. We get into huge arguments all the time that turn physical and I usually leave the house and walk around the neighborhood. One time she told me she didn’t want me in her house and didn’t care where I went so I was going to live with my sister but then she said she wants me to go back home and took me back because she was going to call the cops. My question is, how can I go live with my sister or make other living arrangements without having my mom freak out and not give me consent and a way t where my other siblings won’t be affected

          Comment


          • ccsmod7
            ccsmod7 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are in a really difficult spot living with your aunt, and it is understandable that you would rather be with your sister. You so deserve to be treated with respect.

            You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your guardian's permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend like your sister who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your aunt. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY if you would like to explore your reporting options. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

            Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

            Be safe,

            NRS

        • #7
          Hey im wondering if my parents kicked me out of the house if they could report me as a runaway. I have been on my own for 8 months living with different friends and moved in with my sister and now im with my sister and my boyfriend an he's 21 and ill be 18 in 5 months can they do anything to him since the age gap they dont like that hes 21 and we want to get a place together and there is a chance im pregnant and i dont want him to get in any leagal trouble and I've been out cuz they kicked me out what can i do

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there, thanks for posting. Sounds like you are going through a very difficult time and are looking for some help. You mentioned you were kicked out by your parents and are only 17. We are not legal experts, but generally, 17 is considered a minor in all 50 states, which means your parents have the responsibility to house you or to find a reliable and safe alternative for you to live until you become legally an adult--18 in many states.
            It sounds like you were kicked out and now you are concerned your parents may file a runaway report. That is a valid fear, and unfortunately, it is possible. If you have any text messages, voicemails, etc that show you were kicked out, that may help. Some police departments accept runaway reports up to the age of 18, while others no longer take them if the person is close to legal adulthood. You can find your local non-emergency police number here: usacops.com and call anonymously and ask how they handle situations like this or if they take runaway reports for 17 year olds. You said you have been on your own for 8 months and are living with your sister and boyfriend. It is possible that police will take this into consideration: that you have been able to care for yourself and are living in a safe environment.
            As far as your boyfriend being 21, again, we are not legal experts, but there is a legal "age of consent" for all states, which means someone at that age can choose to be in a relationship with someone older, and parents cannot forbid it legally. To see the laws in your state, go here: https://sexetc.org/action-center/sex-in-the-states/.

            We are glad you reached out for help. That takes a lot of strength and courage! We are 24/7 by phone and live chat on this website so reach out anytime to talk more about your situation or find local resources for pregnancy, housing, food, etc. We also offer conference calling with parents if you would like to have a neutral person help mediate a conversation with your parents about all of this. Call us anytime at 1-800-786-2929.

        • #8
          My brother(12) is thinking about running away from my mom(42) because she is abusive and using illegal substances and she has been since I was 7-9 years old. My brother, my older sister(23) and I(20F) want him to live with me. What steps do I take besides preparing my house for him? Thank you in advance. My family live in ************.
          Last edited by ccsmod5; 03-27-2021, 07:32 AM. Reason: Confidentiality

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thanks for reaching out to us, we hope to help as best we can! You mentioned some things that raise concern for your younger brother. Exposing a minor can be considered a form of abuse, if your sister and you are planning on taking him with you it may be a good idea to report the condition your little brother is living in. We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. They could then potentially give legal custody to the closest family member which would be the adult siblings.

            If this is not a route you are comfortable with, you may want to consider contacting us for a legal aid resource. Someone who may be more familiar with the laws of your state could advise you on your situation. If your mom is still his legal guardian when he moves with you, she could still have the right to file a runaway report and charge you for harboring a runaway.

            If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

            Please be safe and reach out soon by phone or chat so that we may help.
            Take care,
            NRS

        • #9
          hi i'm 21 and i'm running away and my sister wants to come (she is 5) should i bring her

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello There,
            Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you may be in a difficult situation and we want you to know that you are not alone.

            We are not legal experts but in most states the legal age to leave home without guardian permission is 18 years old. So in your case you may be legally allowed to leave home even if you do not get your legal guardian’s permission. But if you were to take you’re your 5-year-old sister with you, you could be charged with harboring a minor or kidnapping. Which can result in you being arrested and charged with kidnapping.

            We can help you explore your situation more and see if there are more options out there for you. We are available to you 24/7, please give us a call or chat with us. We wish you the best of luck!
            NRS

        • #10
          hi i'm 13 and my grandma is always abusing me and i want to run away should i or should i not

          Comment


          • ccsmod13
            ccsmod13 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you so much for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. Know that you deserve to live in peace and happiness, and that abuse of any kind is never okay.

            You mentioned wanting to runaway. Leaving your home is one option you have, and something that we can help you explore on a call (1-800-RUNAWAY) or chat. Running away is not a crime, but it is considered a status offense, meaning illegal because of your age. Minors who runaway and are found by police are often brought back home. However, we are not legal experts and laws vary depending on the situation, so one way to find out what your rights might be would be to call your local non-emergency police number with hypothetical (“what-if”) types of questions. The local nonemergency police number can be found on https://www.usacops.com/ by selecting your state and then county.

            Another option you have is to report your grandma’s abuse with child protective services. This will open a file and within a few days, a social worker will visit your house to assess the living arrangement. Making an abuse report is something that we can also help you through on a call or a chat. Another resource you have is to reach out to Child Help, the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. Like us, your safety is their priority and they can help you file an abuse report or talk you through your options.

            You know yourself and your situation the best, so unfortunately we cannot provide advice what you “should” or “should not” do. Instead, we are always here to support you with whatever you decide. We are a 24/7 resource and our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY and we have a chat option as well.

            Stay Strong,
            NRS

        • #11
          hi 17 and my sister is six and our mom and dad kicked us outed and locked the door and so we ran away on our bikes but we came back and we went back into our house but they seen us and started hitting us and they called the police on us and said "our children our trying to kill us" but we wasn't they was and they was abusing us until we was dead but the police got in the house they saw our mom and dad trying to killed us and the police killed them and now we go nowhere to go can you help us

          Comment


          • ccsmod13
            ccsmod13 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS. We understand it takes great courage to reach out for help and we appreciate you sharing your situation with us. It sounds like you and your siblings have endured some incredibly stressful and traumatic experiences. It seems you have been taking steps to protect yourselves, but are in a tough spot. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If you are able to contact us directly by phone or live chat we can search our database for youth shelters in your area as well.

            We hope to hear from you soon,
            NRS
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