I'm 16 and pregnant and want to move out, can I?

[Guest]

Hello. I'm 18, and a tutor for freshman in highschool. I have a kid with me now who sadly was kicked from home due to his parents homophobia. I don't want to be charged with harboring a "runaway" but the child is 15 and abused horribly. What do I do? I'm his tutor, and all of this seems so wrong; what do I do?

[ccsmod9]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. Some options you have are to be proactive about reporting the abuse to the police. You mentioned that the child has been abused, if there happens to be marks or bruises that would be essential to reporting abuse. Another thing you could do as well is to get their school counselors involved or someone who is an adult that can advocate for the youth involved. Usually the more adults you have in a situation like this the better the response from the police or DCFS will be. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).You can also call Child Help (1800-422-4453) which is an organization that helps with reporting and providing next steps for youth in danger.
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS

[Guest]

Im 18 and my girl friend is 16 when she has the baby can she come with me to a different town where I have great paying job and a house that all I pay is utilities. It has two bedrooms, no mold no mice or broken windows all the water faucets work the stove works the shower works and its furnished. It plenty big for all three of us. And I also have a vehicle can she come.with me. Without parent consent

[ccsmod0]

Hi there,

You mentioned wanting to know how she can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with her parent's permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you both feeling to her parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states she needs to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that she can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

Be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

Hi,I just found out that I am pregnant and I don't know what to do.I am 15 years old and I am dating a 18 year old.I love him a lot and he already knows I am pregnant and my friends.They support me a lot.There is just a couple of things wrong I don't know how long I have been pregnant,I never told a doctor or my mom.I don't know how to tell her...I don't want to live with her because she tries to control everything I just want to live with my bf and his family where they could make me feel comfortable.Is there anyway I can't live with my mom aymore.

[ccsmod4]

Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you frustrated by the living situation with your mother and may be contemplating moving out before you are to turn 18. You mentioned that you are also pregnant.
We understand that sometimes things may become overwhelming and you are not quite sure what to do. Telling her you are pregnant is a big step. We understand it is a difficult situation for you. It sounds like you have supportive people around you. Perhaps you can discuss a plan on giving your mother the news. Looking into prenatal care for you and the baby might be something else to consider. If you need assistance with locating local health care services NRS can help with that. Also because you are a minor you most likely would need a parent’s permission to move out.

We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and explore more about your options or how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I’m 16 and I have a 7th month old baby my mom keeps putting me out her House but keeps telling me I can’t take my baby like is that even Possible ? To keep my child from me I work and take care of my daughter and the dad is very supportive I want to move with him there’s so many people in such a small house we have it’s so annoying , I can’t stand it anymore I want to leave but my mom try’s to hold my baby against me that’s the only reason I stay . Idk what to do

[ccsmod3]

It must be hard to live in a such a toxic environment. If you don’t feel safe in your household you can contact Child Help at 1800-422-4453 and file an abuse report on your parents. Unfortunately just because you have a child at 16 it doesn’t make you legally considered an adult. This means if you were attempting to runaway you are still considered a minor. If you runaway to your boyfriends house your parents could file a runaway report and the police would return to back home if they find you. Your boyfriend could be charged with harboring a runaway.
We are not legal experts but as far as the right that your mom has to keep your child may vary based on the state you reside in. Some states require parental consent for the medical treatment of your baby. Since you are a minor your mom may be have rights over your child. You can check with a legal advocate in your area to get the most accurate information regarding the legal rights available to you.
If you feel overwhelmed or like you need someone to talk to about what is going on at home text NAMI to 741741 for some emotional support. It can be frustrating to feel like you have no options.We hope that you might consider reaching out to us to talk over your situation. We are here to listen and to help and to help keep you safe and off the streets. Whether by phone or live chat, we can help you discover the options that you have. You can reach us 24/7 by phone at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY) or via live chat through the website at www.1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you!

[Guest]

Hi I’m 15 about to be 16 I really want to have a baby with my boyfriend now I don’t like my home with my mother I’m never aloud to go out I’m always stuck at home I have to sneak out in order to see him and he’s 18 he thinks I’m older but I’m actually not in underage do you think that’s a big deal for him and if I get pregnant now would I be able to move in with him now . Would I have to go to school ?

[ccsmod0]

Hi there,

There are three ways you can leave home before you turn the legal age. The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

Becoming pregnant does not necessarily change these options. Depending on the age of consent for your state, it may actually be illegal for you two to be in a relationship. Your parents could possibly have him charged because of your age. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. These are all legal consequences you may want to consider moving forward with your relationship and possible plan of getting pregnant and moving in with him.

Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

Be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

Hello well I’m not sure where to start so basically I have a bf and on dec 24 2019 I started living with him and my parents had talked with him me and his mom then this morning I was at home then my mom calls me saying that the school says if I don’t go that they would call the cops to find me so I tell her I’m going, I get there and this one assistant principal tells me and my parents just cause I’m 16 doesn’t mean I can do what I want and leave cause either I can get sent away or my parents since they’re illegal and go to jail/juvenile and apparently I’m pregnant and I want to be with my bf because him and his family support what I’m going through and are there for me, he works and gives me money for me to eat during the day and now my parents are scared of going to jail or something and want me to stay with them can you please help me

[ccsmod10]

Hi there,

You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your parents permission. If they give you permission to do so then there is nothing that the school can do, unless you do not go to school. Some states have truancy laws where skipping school is not permitted and you and your parents can get into trouble You can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering. If you are preganant and need assistance Planned Parenthood is a great resource. They can be reached at 1-800-230-7526.

Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

Be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

I’m 16 years old and 25 weeks pregnant my dad wants to choose where I take my baby after he is born he wants me to take the baby home with him where I live but I feel more comfortable and have everything my baby needs at my boyfriends house . My dad hasn’t bought anything for my baby as for my boyfriends family has gotten every single thing . I feel stable at my boyfriends house when I’m at my dad’s he constantly stresses me out about his bills his pain and causes me emotional stress . He keeps the air at 70 I’m always hot I just want to know if he has the legal right to make me come home after I give birth and what I can do to make my own choices I live in Florida

[ccsmod2]

We are glad you contacted us today. It sounds like you have been dealing with a lot as you try to adjust with the changes brought on by a pregnancy and becoming a mother. It seems you and your father are not on the same page as to what will when happen when the baby arrives. It’s great that you have the support from your boyfriend and his family. You had a questions about your legal rights as a parenting teen. Unfortunately, we are not legal experts and are unable to provide legal advice. From what we know, pregnancy doesn’t automatically emancipate you and you are not considered an adult until you turn 18. Give us a call or chat with us to explore your options 1-800-786-2929.

[Guest]

so i’m in a tough situation my girlfriend she’s 15 about to be 16 on may 21 she lives in a home where she gets hit and insulted and her parents don’t like anything that makes her happy not even me but we love each other and we mean it she wants to move out she’s talking about emancipation but she’s told me before she’s mentally unstable and she doesn’t tell her parents because they say she’s overreacting but i’m concerned for her because she might try hurting or killing herself because of something they do i was wondering can she move in with me and my parents she also might be pregnant we don’t know yet please hurry i fear for her safety

[ccsmod15]

Hey there,

We are glad you reached out to us, we understand it is tough to seek help and you are very brave in taking that step and reaching out. It sounds like you have been going through a lot with your girlfriend and we are glad that she has someone like you advocating for her safety. She does not deserve to be treated in such a way where she is unable to tell her parents what she is going through.

In most states, being under the age of 18 constitutes being a minor. Because your girlfriend is 15 going on 16, her parents still have a say on where she can live. If she is interested though, because of the abuse she is experiencing, physically and verbally, she does have the right to make an abuse report. Now we are not legal experts, but what that would look like is there is the possibility a caseworker will come out to investigate what has been going on and their decision is what is going to be best for the youth. You and/or your girlfriend can contact the organization Child Help to find out more information on what abuse reporting can look like, what the outcome can be and any other question on what resources and services can be available for you both. They are a 24/7 hotline, just like us, where you can call them at 1-800-422-4453 or you can start a live chat with them at www.childhelp.org.

If she might be pregnant, that is something you definitely would like to find out right away in order to take the next steps and see what options can be available to her. You and/or your girlfriend can contact Planned Parenthood for more questions about different options, the steps to take in order to stay healthy, as well as the services they may be able to provide for you. You can give them a call at 1-800-230-7526 or go on their website to find the nearest Planned Parenthood center at www.plannedparenthood.org

It sounds like everything your girlfriend and you yourself have been going through a lot of emotional and mental stress and it is important to make sure you are practicing self-care and taking care of yourselves. There are many different ways to cope and finding one that fits best for you is going to help a lot in order for you guys to support each other. Contacting NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illnesses, is a great organization to reach out to about different methods of coping as well as being able to talk to them about whatever you may be going through. They are also a 24/7 hotline and are there to help and listen. You can call them at 1-800-950-NAMI (6264), start a live chat with them at www.nami.org, and they also have a text service where you would text the word NAMI to 741741.

With your girlfriend experiencing all this, it seems it has been impacting her negatively to a point where you fear she may try to hurt or even kill herself. Reaching out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline may be able to provide a listening ear for her and help her talk through what she have been experiencing. They are 24/7 as well and you can contact them at 1-800-273-8255 or start a live chat with them at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org

If you want to talk more in depth about what other options you may have or need someone to talk to, do not hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929, we are 24/7 and completely confidential. You can also send us a live chat at www.1800runaway.org. We are here for you, here to help, and here to listen.

Best of Luck,
NRS

[Guest]

I'm 15 and I'm a month pregnant i want to move in with my 17 year old boyfriend him and his family have been supporting me my mom and her boyfriend are both on meth and both do pills his family has said I could live there but my parents will not let me leave how could I get out of this situation?

[ccsmod4]

Hi there,
Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.
You mentioned that you are pregnant and wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with parent/guardian permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s a possibility of your boyfriend’s mother helping you to communicate this to them. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern.
Mom being on drugs may certainly qualify for safety concerns.

Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. However in most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees.
We would be happy to look into legal resources in your area if that’s something you are considering.
We understand the desire for wanting to leave home with the situation being what it is.
We want you to know that we are here to listen and here to help during this difficult time.


If you would like to talk more and discuss these options, please reach out so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

Take care and be safe,

NRS

[Guest]

i'm 16 and i'm pregnant and the guy i'm with is a little older he has a stable job and has a healthy environment for the baby and me to live in his mama is okay with it and i dont want to live here with my mama anymore she is toxic always yelling at me she doesnt care for anybody but herself she thinks everything she does is right and i dont want to be in this environment anymore its not healthy for me and i for sure dont want my child to grow up in a home like this she doesnt even know im pregnant and im scared to tell her can i leave and stay with him without any trouble?

[ccsmod15]

Hey there,
Thanks for reaching out to NRS, it seems like you are going through a lot right now finding out that you are pregnant and it’s understandable that you feel like you need to get out of a toxic place. Its good that you have support in place that can help you through this tough time.
If you were to leave without your mom’s permission she can file a runaway report and have police bring you back home. Police may let you talk about the toxicity at home and choose to let you stay somewhere else safe while they have CPS investigate but that is not a guarantee. There is also a chance that those you stay with could face a harboring a runaway charge for letting you stay with them.
One other option might be emancipation. That is pretty much proving to the state that you can survive on your own without the help of your parent and would be better off on your own. The exact requirements vary from state to state.
Hopefully this information has been helpful. If you want more information on emancipation, or anything else, or just wanted to vent you can always reach us at 1-800-786-2929 or through our online chat.

[Guest]

My daughter just found out ahe is pregnant and is only 16 she and the babies father want to move out together but i dont want that just yet what rights do i have?

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We hope to help you through this difficult situation.
It sounds like you really care for your daughter and want what is best for her. While it is not illegal to leave home as a minor without parental consent, the parent or guardian can report their runaway youth to local police, who will make a good faith effort to find them and bring them home. Keep in mind though that the efforts made to search for runaway youth can vary from state to state or even within districts. Often it is up to the parents to advocate for themselves and keep track of the steps taken to find their youth. It is also smart to contact law enforcement as it can protect you from any charges of neglect.
If you feel like this option does not work, you might have your daughter call us at 1-800-RUN-AWAY. We can safety check her situation, and talk through options that may be good for you both. We also have an excellent service in which we can carry out a conference call between you two. This would have to be initiated by your daughter’s call to us.
Of course, proper health care can be important in whatever path your daughter takes. One way to reach a doctor and find useful resources that specialize in women’s health/pregnancy is to contact Planned Parenthood at 1800-230-7526 or go to their website at https://www.plannedparenthood.org/.
We hope you have found this information useful. We encourage you or your daughter to reach out to us by phone if you need anything more. Good luck navigating this situation. You have done a great job already.
Sincerely,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi I’m 16 and I’m pregnant I live with a bunch of people in my house and some just so happens to be addicted to drugs I was told if I was to get pregnant I would be kicked out by the owner of the house that is in no way related to me but I know my parents would never let me leave but with the father of my baby living far away from me things would be hard and he is fully there for me and supports me in every way but I couldn’t have my baby living here or without me that’s just wrong and I couldn’t do that I know about emancipation but I don’t know how I would do it or even begin or how to get it done and I don’t want to be filed as a run away I just don’t want to be here anymore me and my baby are in more danger here then we would be in about any other situation that I could think of I truly just need help on what to do my mom is toxic and files for money on me but acts as if when she buys me food I should be “great full” but I didn’t ask to be born and the things that are said to me here are so disrespectful they don’t know I’m pregnant yet because I’m scared of their reaction I’m scared they will lock me up in this house and not let me see my baby’s father and I don’t know how much more I can take in this house I need a way out

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon. We can help look up resources for places you can stay as well.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hello, I’m 16 years old, I take care of my 14 year old brother who has special needs and have been taking care of him for 6 years straight now. I’m also 28 weeks pregnant, I don’t know how to talk about this, but I can’t continue to watch my brother. I’m told to feed him, change his diaper, and sleep with him as if I’m the mother. He has mini seizures and falls out of nowhere so I have to stay sitting down with him everyday to make sure nothing happens to him. I can’t live my life as a girl my age could, if I do go out I always have to be home at a certain time to receive my brother from bus and watch him, I’ve tried to talk to my parents like a million times but nothing I say makes them care, they don’t understand how much it mentally affects me, I can’t even sleep sometimes because my brother won’t let me sleep. Whenever they decide to take him (rare case) he stays up and so my parents bring him to me because they rather themselves get sleep and let me stay up even tho I have school the next day. I wanted to get emancipated but I read that I would need parents consent, my parents wouldn’t even think about it. I don’t want to runaway, is there anything else I could do? My boyfriends parents would gladly take me in as one of their own

[ccsmod9]

Hello there. We are glad you reached out to the National Runaway Safeline forums. From what you have told us, it sounds like you are dealing with a lot right now. It is understandable to feel overwhelmed by the pressure you are under. No one deserves to feel like their mental health is being put at risk. I am hearing that you are expected to care for your younger brother most of the time, and that is making it hard to live as a 16 year old. It must be frustrating to feel like you are not being heard when you try to talk to your parents about your situation. It also sounds like your main concern is being able to take care of yourself and staying healthy through your pregnancy. It appears you have thought about a number of possible actions to take, and we would be happy to talk to you about what it might look like to follow through with them. If you would like to discuss your situation further, feel free to call the 24 -hour hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY or reach out to our chatline. With more information, we will be able to provide you with useful resources that might help with your situation.

[Guest]

hi.. i was just googling info & i came across this website.. i talked to my grandpa & aunt about going to live with them & that my moms house is toxic. i just moved from my dads a year & a half ago to my moms because his wife lied on me & would hit me..but now my mom does nothing but drink & act erratically & i’m willing to do anything to get away. but i’m tired of moving & want to settle down once & for all because i’ve always gone back & forth with my mom & dad because i couldn’t live with family because my dad had temporary custody. so now i feel living with my aunt & grandpa would be way better because they’ve never hurt me in any way. i’m so willing to leave i’ll get pregnant to make sure neither parent wants me & will leave me alone at my grandparents. if i got pregnant - (i know you’re not supporting this decision but i still would like feedback)- & moved to my aunts or papas without telling my mom or dad til i got there that it’s because i’m pregnant, would i still be able to see my boyfriend & be left alone & not taken back to my toxic parents ?

[ccsmod15]

Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It takes great courage to reach out for help, and we are glad that you have decided to reach out to us. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time and we want you to know that you are not alone.
If you have permission from you mother to move in with your aunt and grandpa, you would want to get something in writing, and with their signatures, if not you might be considered a runaway. As long as your mother approves of the move, everything else should be fine. In regards to getting pregnant, do you believe that is the best decision for you? Being a teen mom is not easy and potentially can be harder on you, especially if you do not have the support from either of your parents. It might be worth exploring your choices with those you trust like your aunt, and grandpa, so you’ll have a better outcome.
We hope that this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are available to you 24/7 to listen and to provide support through this challenging time.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Best of luck!
NRS

[Guest]

I'm 17 im also pregnant. Im living with my adoptive parents but there house is really dirty and smells like urine amonia from all of there pets. Theres feces everywhere and nastiness all over the house. I don't want to bring a kid into this house because I'm worried about it getting taken. Emancipation isn't a thing where I'm located and I don't know what else to do. I don't want my baby taken but I really don't know what to do ill be 18 2 months after its born. I could also get really sick and so could my baby because of the condition of the house

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes a great deal of courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and it is understandable to look for some assistance.

What you are describing does not sound like a healthy environment and it could even be considered gross parental neglect, which is a form of abuse. If you would like to make an abuse report about what is going on that is your right. You can do that through us or through www.childhelp.org (1-800-422-4453).

If you’re feeling unsafe and need a safe place to go and talk to someone, you may wish to visit The National Safeplace website (www.nationalsafeplace.org). This organization provides access to immediate help and supportive resources for youth in need. You can look up your city and state to see if there are any safe places near you listed. So that is always an option if you feel like talking to someone in person about what has been going on or if you just need of a safe place to stay. You can also use their TXT 4 HELP free service offered to all youth in crisis. It’s quick, easy, safe, and confidential:

·         Text the word “safe” and your current location (address, city, state) to 69866

·         Within seconds, you will receive a message with the closest Safe Place site and phone number for the local youth agency.

TLP’s (Transitional Living Programs) and shelters could also be a resource that would be helpful to you during this time. We are here as support to help through this challenging time and could discuss further details by phone or chat. If this is something you would be interested in please contact us soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

Be safe,

NRS