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im 16 and u want to move out of my parents house

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  • #76
    I'm 16

    My family hates me. It's something almost every teen says, but i meant it. My mom and step dad always yell at each other, my 5 siblings cut me out of everything they do. My step dad has repeatedly called me names and told me I'm worthless and unwanted. They have also cut me off from my dad's side of the family since he is no longer with us. Because of all this I have had to start going to therapy. And it doesn't help. I just wanna move in with a friend. Somewhere where i can feel loved and wanted and important. Here, that is not an option. Am I at liberty to move out without parent consent and what would be the first step to move out?

    Comment


    • ccsmod7
      ccsmod7 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are enduring a lot of hurt at home with your siblings, your mom, and your stepdad. It is wildly not okay that your stepdad has called you names, called you worthless, and unwanted. You are not lesser than anyone else - not your stepdad or siblings. You deserve to be treated with respect and basic human dignity. It also seems hurtful that your dad's side cut you out after he passed. We are very sorry for your loss. Even though it might not feel like it right now, we want you to know that you are not alone, and there are people and resources out there that truly want to help.

      Sorry to hear that you have not been getting what you need from therapy. Sometimes it takes a few or more sessions of talk therapy in order to be helpful. However, if you ever want a different therapist, please do not hesitate to call or chat us for additional counseling/therapy resources.

      We are not legal experts but we can answer your question generally. If you leave home without permission, your guardian may file a runaway report with the police. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. However,sometimes local police have different protocols for older youth. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway.

      Please do not hesitate to call or chat if you have questions, need resources, or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

      -NRS

  • #77
    I am 16yrs old ik live Texas I have a bad habit of lieing but I have witnesses if that is needed! I have reported my situation twice and cps has gotten involved and done nothing! My mom is verbally and physically abusive to me and my father and we left but he went back! And I told my parents I dont believe what they believe they said that they are going to force me into church the more j pull out of church! I want to be emancipated and my parents have only reported me missing when I run and not looked for me! I want to be free from this pain! I have already tried drawing and writing and cutting but i doesnt help! Can I be emancipated if I run away to be emancipated! Can I be emancipated if I am moving in with a room mate who is on health care and is not biologically realated to me? Can I be emancipated without parent permission or having to fight in court?

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,

      Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and we are here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a really difficult time right now. Any type of abuse is unacceptable and you do not deserve to be treated that way. We are sorry that CPS did not do anything to help your case. Sometimes it may take multiple reports for them to step in and for something to happen, you could consider making another report if you would like. To become emancipated you must be 16 or 17 years old and living apart from your guardians and be able to financially support yourself. If you would like legal services resources you may call us at 1800runaway and we would be more than happy to provide you numbers of legal resources that may help with emancipation. Also just so you are aware emancipation does take 6 months- 1 year and can cost money in court fees. We hope this information was helpful in your situation. If you have any more questions or would like to discuss more about your situation feel free to call us we are available 24/7. Thanks again for reaching out, we wish you the best of luck!
      NRS

  • #78
    Hi my name is Jennifer and my son is only 16 year old and we live Indiana he told me he was not going to come back home he was going to stay with his girl friend and I don't think that is a good idea but he told me he was not going to come back home so can I make him come home...

    Comment


    • ccsmod9
      ccsmod9 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it takes a lot to reach out and seek help. Our hope is to provide you with tips and resources in order to make the best decision available to you.
      Though we aren’t legal experts from what we can gather from your story is that you have been put in a very stressful situation and we are sorry to hear that. As far as your son since he is 16, he is technically a minor and therefore you still have legal custody of him. What you can do is file a report with the police and from there if you know where he is at or the police know where he is at, they can bring him back home without question. Again know that you are more than able to continue to get him back home
      We commend you on your bravery for reaching out and contacting us. If for any reason you have more questions or concerns you can feel free to contact us at (1-800-786-2929) or online through our chat option (www.1800runaway.org).
      Best Wishes- NRS

  • #79
    Hi I’m 15 and I wanna leave my home I turn 16 in January and I have a place to live if I’m legally able to. I live in Minnesota and I can’t stand it here my father has physically abused me and he verbally does now almost every day. I wanna know if I can thank you

    Comment


    • ccsmod7
      ccsmod7 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello there, thanks for reaching out today.

      Sounds like you are experiencing abuse at home and wanting to leave home once you turn 16. We are sorry to hear you are dealing with all of that, you do not deserve to be harmed in anyway and you should be able to feel safe in your own home.

      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to child protective services (CPS). Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody. If you would like assistance with filing a report or going over your options please do not hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

      18 years old is generally the age that an individual may leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian in Minnesota. We are not legal experts here but we can speak in general terms. If you leave home without permission, your parent/guardian may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city so we cannot predict exactly what would happen in your case. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. You can let police know that home is unsafe for you, but that would be leaving it up to the individual officer's response. They could get CPS involved and look for a safe place for you to go, or they could return you home if there is no evidence of abuse. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.

      Please do not hesitate to reach out via calling or live chatting us if you would like additional assistance. We are here to listen, here to help.

      Best,

      NRS

  • #80
    I’m 16 and trying to dip outta my house but I’m scared that my parents will call the cops and make me come back.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 11-20-2018, 04:12 AM.

    Comment


    • #81
      Reply: I’m 16 and trying to dip outta my house


      Hello,
      Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

      We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
      We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. It sounds like you are thinking about leaving home but there is some concern about the police becoming involved. We understand. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance.
      If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Take care,
      NRS


      We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • #82
        I am 16 years old and I really want to move out. I live in Missouri which says you can move out at the age of 17, until 2021 when that changes. But I am sixteen, and I have 9 more months to go. I understand it doesn't seem like a lot of time but every day is a year. I cry so hard every day that I cannot feel my limbs. I have legal guardians that send me to my mom. My mom calls me names like a bully, a whore, a b**ch, a f**k up, a piece of trash, satan, and many more. She has hit me a few times and child services were called but nothing EVER comes out of it. (They have been hotlined 8 times). Both my guardians and mom tell me I am delusional, I am beyond help, I will be a homeless failure, everything is my fault, and more. They badmouth my biological father (which I was close to before the courts made me go with my legal guardians), my friends, and even my teachers. They also ruin my reputation, setting me up for stealing and lying so I get in trouble with the law. Sometimes they do this just before I have to go to school or church so I have to keep myself put together instead of arguing or crying. They flat out refuse to get me a counselor for my emotions. I understand there is such a thing as emancipation but I don't have the money or the job and they won't let me. I cannot take this anymore. I have told them my feelings over and over and over and it doesn't get through to them, I get punished instead. I do not have a family member that they will agree to take me that will take me and keep me safe from them. Everyone I would feel safe with is off limits with my legal guardians. They became my legal guardians with lies anyway. I am not one of those victims who sits there quietly, I have told everyone! No one will do anything! Not the police, not the school, not the courts, not the church, and no shelters. I have nowhere but to stay here instead and I do not have the strength to do it anymore. I can't find any advice on how to deal with emotional and verbal abuse that I can do, (they pretty much say leave the abuser or/and seek professional counseling). Please, I am begging someone to at least listen and look at my situation, no one else will! Is there anything I can do? Is there a shelter, a law, or even a strategy on what I can do. This life is torture, please help me! What can I do to make it stop? Is there any way I can leave without their permission? Is there any place that would protect me for at least a little bit of time without them?

        Comment


        • ccsmod0
          ccsmod0 commented
          Editing a comment
          Often, youth may reach out to NRS in several different ways to discuss their situation. If a response from NRS is not visible to a bulletin posting it may be that we have already provided services to that individual through another platform we provide such as email, our crisis hotline, or our live chat service (in operation every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST). NRS encourages anyone in need of assistance to contact us through our 24 hour crisis hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY to receive immediate support.
          Thank you, NRS

      • #83
        Im 16 years old turned on sep 25 2002
        i live in San Antonio Texas
        i live with my mother alone she is horrible i beem emotionally abused all my life and physical abused when i was young I'm pretty sure i see a therapist because living with her has caused me problems im not happy my best friend is 17 and their mom is willing to provide for me i will get a job and i know how to take care of myself pls help me

        Comment


        • ccsmod3
          ccsmod3 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline and sharing a little bit about what is going. It takes a lot of courage to reach out and especially in a time where you have a really tough and complex situation at home. We are sorry you are experiencing abuse, no one ever deserves to go through that. You do have the right to report the abuse to Child Help at 1-800-422-4453. You can either do it yourself or call into us directly and we can support you through it. It is hard to say the result of reporting, but if you call in you can ask what the process might look like.

          Also another way you can seek help is reaching out to a friend, teacher, or counselor at school that can help you look for resources. Your mental health is important. You can also look at SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) at samhsa.gov (call them directly at 1-877-726-4727) or NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness 1-800-950-NAMI to help you find the support that you need.
          We aren’t legal experts, but we have general knowledge about running away. In most states, running away isn’t illegal, but what is called a status offense. You can’t get arrested for it but it will mostly likely go on your record until you are 18. The police will only know if you have runaway if your parents/guardians file a police report. We can’t say for sure how the police will respond, but we hear a lot that police will take potential places you might be and will actively search for you. If they come across you, the most likely will return you home to your parents. Sometimes we hear that if you are staying with someone who knows you are a runaway and are not actively trying to return you or finding shelter for you, your guardians/or police can press charges against the people who are housing you, with something that is called harboring.

          We are here for you and will support you in anyway that we can. Please feel free to call into us directly as we can talk further about your situation and find resources that are best for you in your area. Stay strong and you are not alone in this! Our hotline ( 1-800-RUNAWAY) and chat are open 24/7.

          -NRS

      • #84
        I'm 16 years old and I need to find a way to leave my home legally in the state of south carolina. I know i will never meet the grounds for legal emancipation without joining the military or getting married. However, I need to leave without being established as a runaway. I don't want legal trouble. My parents are divorced and my mom has sole custody of me and I live with her. I know my dad would allow me to be emancipated or marry. Even though my mom has sole custody could he sign for me? What are my option? How can I legally leave home at the age of 16 in south carolina before I turn 17?

        Comment


        • ccsmod5
          ccsmod5 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello,
          We’re very glad you reached out and are taking steps towards getting yourself into a more comfortable living situation. We are not legal experts, but if you want to leave home at the age of 16, you would not be arrested or charged with a crime. Running away is a “status” offense, so if you do get picked up by the police, they will simply return you to your mother’s home. Alternatively, you may be able to move out with your mother’s permission. If you would like to change your custody to your father, that may be something that is possible if your mother agrees to give up custody.
          Additionally, South Carolina does not have a formal emancipation process. As you mentioned, one way to become emancipated could be to get married, but there may be other ways to be emancipated through court process. You may want to start by going to your local courthouse and asking them about emancipation procedures if you would like to try that route.
          If you are dealing with any sort of abuse at home, you could reach out to Child Help by calling them at 1-800-422-4453. You deserve to live in a safe, supportive environment. Please feel free to call us anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY to talk further with someone in person. Good luck and take care!
          -NRS

      • #85
        im 16 and i wanna leave home because my dad is so rude he blames me for everything my mom lives in california i have no phone and everything is so stressful please help

        Comment


        • ccsmod7
          ccsmod7 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are in a rough situation at home with your dad. It can't be easy to deal with being blamed for everything, and here at NRS we truly want to support you and inform you as best we can.

          If you are wanting to move in with your mom and she has some custody rights over you that could be an option. That does sound really stressful not having a phone, but if there is anyway you can borrow another one or contact your mom via email or social media you might try to let her know that you want to move. We are not legal experts, but generally speaking older youth have more of a say with which parent they live with when parents have joint custody. If your mom needs any legal aid resources to help her out with going to court, please chat us or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY for those resources.

          18 years old is generally the age that an individual may leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian. We are not legal experts here but we can speak in general terms. If you leave home without permission, your dad may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city so we cannot predict exactly what would happen in your case. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. However, if you are with your mom police might see it as a civil issue for the courts rather than a runaway situation. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.

          Please do not hesitate to call or chat if you have questions, need legal resources, or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

          -NRS

      • #86
        Hello, I live in California and am 16 years old. I want to move out of my home and go live with my sister but without my parents consent. I am extremely depressed here and my parents are a big trigger for me. I really don’t know how much longer I can put up with them. I’m so tired and drained of everything. I’m scared i will end up hurting myself if I don’t leave. I want to live with my sister but i don’t want my parents to force me to go back with them. Is there any way I can do that without getting in trouble ?

        Comment


        • ccsmod9
          ccsmod9 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your parent’s permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

          Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

          Be safe,

          NRS

      • #87
        my dad is going crazy and i need to leave home but he won’t let me, im 16

        Comment


        • ccsmod3
          ccsmod3 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello,
          It sounds like you are dealing with a stressful home situation that you are unable to get away from. And it sounds like your situation with your dad is strained and he is strict about allowing you to leave.
          One option to consider is finding someone who could mediate a conversation with your dad about this. This could be a relative or family friend who would listen to your concerns and your dad’s concerns and help you talk to each other and maybe come to a compromise. For instance, maybe you could stay with a relative for a little while until things calm down at home.
          If you don’t know of someone who might be willing to mediate for you, we offer a conference call service where we can take on that role. Sometimes compromise is more possible than it seems.
          If you ever need someone to talk to, please don’t hesitate to call us any time, day or night, at 1-800-RUNAWAY or contact us online at 1800runaway.org. We are here to listen, here to help.

      • #88
        I know someone who has been going through lots since they were born. Their parents are always arguing, moving out, verbally abusing them. The parents also blame the kids for everything and practically gave up on being parents and expect them to be responsible for everything. Can the underage kid move out without causing too much problems?

        Comment


        • ccsmod3
          ccsmod3 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline and sharing some of your concerns with us. It sounds like you’re concerned about your friend and what would happen if they were to leave home. Although we are not legal experts, we do have some general knowledge in regards to matters like these. If the child is still considered a minor and were to move out with parental consent his parents have the right to file a runaway report. If a report is filed and he is found by police then they may require him to return back home. If the you or the youth feels that the environment is unsafe child abuse reporting is always an option. An abuse report can be filed with child protective services agency in your state. If you would like to discuss this situation further or would like to pass along our contact to your friend; we can be reached at 1800-runaway by phone or by chat at 1800runaway.org. We hope this information was helpful and best of luck to both you and your friend. Take care.

      • #89
        I am 16 years old and i want to leave my moms house i feel unwelcomed and she is always **********ing me out i dont want to stay here anymore is there a way i can leave and them not say anyhting to me

        Comment


        • ccsmod10
          ccsmod10 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hi there,

          Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. From your email to us here, we can see that you have very similar questions to a lot of our callers and you’re looking for some answers. It seems like there must be a lot going on in your life, especially at home, if you’re thinking about leaving home. It’s great that you were able to find out some information about our hotline. Hopefully we can help.

          As a minor (under the age of majority), you aren't able to leave home without your parents’ permission. We aren’t legal experts, but what generally what typically happens if a minor runs away, is that your parents would be able to make a runaway. You can’t be arrested for running away in some cases we’ve heard of police not taking runaway reports on youth who are close to turning 18. A good way to find out exactly what the police protocols are in your city, would be to reach out to your local non-emergency police. You can ask them hypothetical questions about running away.

          If you give us a call on our 24/7 fully confidential hotline, at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help answer some of those questions you have and could potentially help you brainstorm a solution to the issues you are having. We also have an online chat service available through our website (www.1800runaway.org) if you don’t feel like calling in to talk on the phone.

          Best, NRS

      • #90
        Hi I’m 15 years old and I’m from Michigan. I have read through some of these and I’ve come to see that emancipation is going to be my only way out. I know unfortunately that I have to wait till I’m 16 but I don’t have a job and I don’t plan on getting one until I know I’m in a stable place. I feel completely misunderstood and mentally abused by my parents, they not only harass me about mistakes I’ve made in my past but they are in a sense very coward like people. They have lied to me my whole life about who my real father is and to this day are still lying and keeping it from me. The man who in which is my real father had died a few years ago and I just found out and never once met him in my life. I’ve considered suicide and before and only from there my parents have told me that I was over exaggerating. They simply just don’t care. I was cutting for a while and all my dad did was looked me in the eyes and said “don’t do that ******** again” I’ve been completely pushed to the edge and on the verge of breaking with them. I cannot take this anymore. My dad’s ex-wife who in which has always been there for me and I just reached out to had very generously opened her arms and home to me and I would love to except it completely because not only is she more of a mom than who I’m with now but she cares with a passion and I know she will be in my best interest to be around and with.
        Last edited by ccsmod4; 12-12-2018, 08:55 AM.

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