Hello there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are enduring a lot of hurt at home with your siblings, your mom, and your stepdad. It is wildly not okay that your stepdad has called you names, called you worthless, and unwanted. You are not lesser than anyone else - not your stepdad or siblings. You deserve to be treated with respect and basic human dignity. It also seems hurtful that your dad's side cut you out after he passed. We are very sorry for your loss. Even though it might not feel like it right now, we want you to know that you are not alone, and there are people and resources out there that truly want to help.
Sorry to hear that you have not been getting what you need from therapy. Sometimes it takes a few or more sessions of talk therapy in order to be helpful. However, if you ever want a different therapist, please do not hesitate to call or chat us for additional counseling/therapy resources.
We are not legal experts but we can answer your question generally. If you leave home without permission, your guardian may file a runaway report with the police. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. However,sometimes local police have different protocols for older youth. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway.
Please do not hesitate to call or chat if you have questions, need resources, or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.
-NRS
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im 16 and u want to move out of my parents house
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Guest repliedI'm 16
My family hates me. It's something almost every teen says, but i meant it. My mom and step dad always yell at each other, my 5 siblings cut me out of everything they do. My step dad has repeatedly called me names and told me I'm worthless and unwanted. They have also cut me off from my dad's side of the family since he is no longer with us. Because of all this I have had to start going to therapy. And it doesn't help. I just wanna move in with a friend. Somewhere where i can feel loved and wanted and important. Here, that is not an option. Am I at liberty to move out without parent consent and what would be the first step to move out?
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Reply:I’m 16 and I live in Oklahoma
Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.
We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
While we are not experts on the law, someone under 18 that leaves home, the parent/guardian may file them as a runaway and they may be returned home. Also, those that a reported runaway stays with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. Anyone found to be assisting or aiding someone to run away may also find themselves at risk legally. For more specifics on the law, you might consider contacting the local non-emergency number for the police. You might also look for a legal aid center in the area. They may be able to answer any legal questions on the subject.
If you would like to talk more about your situation we can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
We hope to hear from you soon.
Take care,
NRS
We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us
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Guest repliedI’m 16 and I live in Oklahoma and I’m not happy at home there’s too much pressure on me and I’ve tried everything to make them just let up a little bit whatever I do just isn’t good enough I want to leave home and I already have two for sure homes that will take me in gladly that I trust. Can I do this?Last edited by ccsmod4; 10-16-2018, 01:10 AM.
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Thank you for reaching out NRS! We know that it can be a difficult things to reach out and seek help. We just want you to know that we are here to help and listen in any way we can
We are sorry to hear that you do not feel safe in any one of your parent’s home. You do not deserve to feel like you cannot rest anywhere. Though we are not legal experts, what we can gather is that because you are 16 you are still considered a minor. What this means if you do runaway your parents have the right to file a report. What this means is that you if the Police do find you, you will be taken back home. Some other consequences depending on your situation and state is you might have to go to court. However nothing involving jail time could be given if you did choose to runaway since it is not technically illegal. If you feel like you are no longer safe anywhere please know that you have the right to call and report your parents. You can call your local Police station or the National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-422-4453). You deserve to feel safe and cared for no matter what. Another option you can explore is perhaps talking to a school counselor about the situation at home. Perhaps a family member or adult you trust could speak with you and your parents about the situation. Just know you have the right to protect yourself. If you do happen to runaway NRs can provide you with shelters, transitional housing programs, food pantries, etc.
Again we want to commend your bravery for reaching out and more than anything seeking out help which can be the most difficult of all things. We hope that we have helped provide some options for you to look over. If for any reason you feel like you have more questions or concerns please do not hesitate to call us at (1-800-786-2929) or online at (www.1800runaway.rg) on our chat option.
Best Wishes-NRS
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Guest repliedHi im 16 an dont feel safe in either of my parents houses what can i do, is there any way i can move out right now
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Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS! We know that it can take a lot for you to reach out and seek help. We commend your bravery for wanting to explore your options and seeking resources.
From what we gather from your story your mom has been a source of neglect for you. You feel as though she has been tough on you and does not give you affirmation. No one deserves to be put down or treated poorly. Our immediate concern is if you consider yourself to be in a safe place. No one should have to endure physical abuse or keep being put down. If you do feel you are no longer safe, know you have the right to inform any school personnel, police officer about the abuse. A hotline you can reach out to in this type of situation is the National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-422-4453). This organization will also be able to help as well. Though we aren’t legal experts from what we can inform you about running away is that, you are considered a minor. This means your guardian has the right to keep filing the runaway report. So if the police do find you they would take you back to your guardian’s home. What’s more is that if you decide to live with your boyfriend and he takes you in his parents would be charged with harboring a minor. The severity of this charge differs in states. If you do happen to runaway, some options available to you are to call us here at (1-800-786-2929) or our chat option at www.1800runaway.org. From there we can discuss options for shelters, food pantries, etc. We also have the ability to help find you transitional housing, or even conference calling out to your guardian to see if any solution can be found between you and your guardian.
Again we want to thank you for reaching out to us. We know it can be difficult to be in a tough spot but we want you to know that we are to help and listen as best we can. If for any reason you find yourself with more questions or concerns feel free to reach out to us at our hotline (1-800-786-2929) or out chat option online www.1800runaway.org . We hope that this information can help give you a better view of the options you have.
Best Wishes- NRS
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Guest repliedI'm 16 and i would love to move out but i have no where to go not even with family and i don't want to move to a foster home but that's basically my only choose with my mom and when ever i try to leave she calls the cops and living here is a living hell because anything i do she does not like or it's not the way she does it i get yelled at or hit or even something thrown at me i have to many scars and bruises to be able to do this by myself i have a plan to move in with my boyfriends but I'm afraid if i move in later on something will happen and we break up and then i have no where to go so i need help.
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Hi,
Thanks so much for reaching out with your question. It sounds like you are going through a lot at home right now. You mentioned feeling unsafe, and described an abusive situation at home. We’re sorry you are not feeling safe in your own home right now, and it’s unfortunate that you have been treated so poorly. You did the right thing by reaching out. The main concern seems to be the abusive situation creating an unsafe environment for you and your siblings, it sounds like you have thought a lot about your options. Although you are still considered a minor (in most states, youth are considered adults at age 1, there are some options to consider that might help get you into a safer environment.
If you are not safe at home, and have somewhere else you can stay – even temporarily – that might be a good first step to take if it is an option for you. Given the abuse you described, you also have the option of contacting your local authorities and/or department of child and family services to file an abuse report. It is difficult to know exactly what the process might look like, and the time it takes between reporting and seeing results may vary on a case by case basis. If you would like help or support during the reporting process, we are available to help 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are completely confidential, but have to report abuse of minors if given information that could identify you. If you have questions about the reporting process, or would like to discuss your situation and options in greater detail, you can call us at any time. There is always someone available to provide support, discuss options, and find resources in your area if needed. We also have an online crisis chat set up that is currently available from 4:30p to 11:30p CST.
If you are not ready to report the abuse, that is understandable as it can be an intimidating process, however it is still important that you get to a safe place. Because you are still 16, leaving home without permission may be difficult. If you leave home, your mom can file a runaway report with your local police department and in most cases, they would be obligated to bring you back home. However, the police typically would not return you to an abusive situation if they were aware of that. We often hear that while the legal age of majority is 18, at 17 some local police no longer take runaway reports or make the youth return home if they leave without permission. Unfortunately we cannot answer specific legal questions but a good option to get some information may be to contact your local police department on their non-emergency line. They may be able to answer some of your questions about moving out and discuss options for getting you and your siblings into a safer environment.
Again, we are so glad that you contacted us to talk about your situation. You are in a difficult position and you do not have to face that alone. We are here to help 24/7 and you can contact us immediately at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Feel free to call or contact us again at any time. We are here to help you work through this difficult time. Stay safe and take care.
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Guest repliedI’m 16 I’ll be 17 in April and I live in Ohio, I’ve been getting physically abused and mentally my whole life . It’s gotten really bad to where I can’t live at home my mom made me break up with my girlfriend that I’ve been dating for almost a year and a half just bc she couldn’t control our relationship. I don’t think I’ve ever had a good day with her . She hits my little siblings for no reason once it was because my sister didn’t want to give her a hug she hit her in the face . I have witnesses for all the acts my
mom has done and I would have a safe place to go if I can legally move out . But I’m not sure if I can
it’s not safe at my house.
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Hi there,
Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline- we are happy to help. It sounds like your not so happy with your current living situation and are looking to move out of you parents’ house. This can be really confusing, but we are here to clarify things for you. Though we aren’t legal experts, there are a few things we can tell you. Because you are not yet considered an adult in most states, it is likely that if you leave home and your parents file a runaway report, the police will bring you back home if they find you. That said, if you get your parents permission to leave, it is important to have a plan and consider the safety of your new situation. We hope this was helpful, but if you still have questions or would just like to chat, don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1(800)-786-2929. Again, we are happy to help.
Best,
National Runaway Safeline
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Guest repliedI am 16 my name is Alex and I wanna move out can I
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Reply: I’m located in the state of Washington.
Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).
It sounds like you might be talking about emancipation.
If you would like some information about the emancipation process in your city and state, contact NRS at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or www.1800Runaway.org (Live chat).
NRS is here to listen and here to help.
We look forward to hearing from you.
Take care,
NRS
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Guest repliedI’m located in the state of Washington. I am 16 years old and would like to move out of my parents house for 2 years until I reach the age of 18. The legal age in the state of Washington is 16 to leave without parent consent but in order for me to do this I would need a type of form or documents that could just have my mom removed and not liable for anything I do not because I will plan getting in trouble but to secure she couldn’t get in trouble for any sort of issue so she isn’t questioned by dcf or Anything she has two other children so I don’t want anything affecting them
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed right now between living with your dad in a hotel and feeling depressed. That must be really hard to deal with. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in you going insane if you do not move out.
Unfortunately, 18 is the legal age you can move out in Indiana without parental permission in Indiana. The easiest way you can move in with your girlfriend is with your dad's permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to dad.
If you leave home without permission, your dad may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city so we cannot predict exactly what would happen in your case. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. So your girlfriend or her mom could be at risk of harboring a runaway charges if you stay with them as a runaway. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.
Please do not hesitate to call or chat if you have questions, need resources, or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat.
We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.
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