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  • #61
    Title: moving out at 16

    hey, so I’ve been reading a lot about moving out legally and the certain ages of which you can do it. I have a lot of problems at home with fights and just a generally bad atmosphere to be around. I know that in no time I should have enough money with the help of a room mate to move out on my own but I don’t know if I’m old enough or if it’s the best idea, but I know my mom wouldn’t just let me leave. What should I do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks for connecting with NRS. You may have already read that the age of majority (when you can make decisions independently as an adult) in most states is 18. Prior to that age, to live outside the home requires consent by the parents or legal guardians. Your mom could file a report with law enforcement if you leave before adulthood, in an effort to get you returned home. A minor typically cannot sign a lease, and an adult who shelters you as a runaway could be in legal risk.

      It sounds like you're going through a difficult time right now, so something you could consider is talking to a counselor at school, a trusted teacher, or even a trusted adult about what is going on. Just having someone to talk to when things are getting rough could be a big help to you and could take a lot of pressure and stress off your shoulders.

      If you are comfortable calling NRS at 800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), we will listen to what is happening at home, help ensure you stay safe, and can offer resources to answer questions about moving out. It’s great that you are thinking before acting, and NRS will be here for you when want to talk.

  • #62
    Hello,I live in Missouri and I will be 17 in June and I have been having a rough time the past 2 years. My mom was in a terrible accident.. not fatal, but terrible. I have been raising my self for God knows how long and the past 2 years I have been supporting myself with the help of my 18 year old boyfriend. We are planning to move out on our own when I turn 17. We are a pretty stable couple.. and we have already talked to my mother about this and she is totally okay with it, would my boyfriend and I be okay with that considering the standards of law? Because I've heard many people tell me different things. She gives me consent. At first she was kinda iffy.. So, what if she gives me consent and a few months later she wants to drag me back home. Would she be able to do so? so Im asking two questions. Thank you in Advance!!!

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,

      Thank you for reaching out to us, we know it is not always easy to ask for help. It must be difficult to take care of yourself and to have to deal with your mother’s accident. It is amazing that you have supportive people in your life who you trust and that you have a plan for what you want to do.

      We are not legal experts here, but we can give you some general information about your situation. As far as we know, if your parents give you consent to move out, that is allowed, but try to get it documented somewhere in case she changes her mind. If she wanted to bring you back home, since she is your legal guardian she might be able to do that. In some places, however, police stations do not take runaway reports for 17 year olds, so if she did want to bring you home you could call the local police station and see if they would bring a 17 year old runaway back home.

      Again, it is great that you are using all of the resources available to you to try to find the best option for you, it shows how responsible you are. If you have any more questions in the future or just want to talk, feel free to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us through our website, we are happy to help.

      Best of Luck,
      National Runaway Safeline

  • #63
    Hi. I'm 17 and turn 18 this december, i dont think i can wait any longer, i dont get along with my family very well, i live in missouri and i was wondering if i could move out without my parents permisson, i heard you can but i dont want to be arrested or have a search party on my tail

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi, thanks for posting about this. It sounds like you are in a tough situation, and wanting to get out can be a natural reaction. Running away is a Status Offence, so you can’t be arrested for that since you would not be a criminal. However, your parents would be able to file a Runaway Report, but since you are 17 your local police department may not even accept it since you are close to being a legal adult. If it did go through what happens is that if police find you they would simply bring you back to your parents. When you turn 18 the Runaway Report would become a Missing Person report instead. You may want to call your local Police Department and see what they do for 17 year old runaways regarding this issue. Thanks again for posting, and if you want more specific help please chat online with us, or call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

  • #64
    I'm currently 16 years old, I live in Kanas City Missouri. I have an abusive father, who hits me and allows my older brother to beat me up for no apparent reason. If I don't say please or thank you, or kiss them on the cheek or hug them after they buy me food or watch my 9 month old daughter, they threaten to take her away from me and then put their hands on me. My mother punches me and slaps me across the face in front of my child. All because they say I'm ungrateful because I go to school and I watch my daughter. They made me quit my job, so I couldn't get emancipated, and prove I had good amount of money coming my way to support me and my daughter. My father gave me a car, and made me make the payments on it, so technically it was his car but making me pay for it. And then once I lost my job he said he's taking me to court because I no longer can afford the car payments and pushes me up against the wall or lifts me up by my shoulders or my shirt. My mother let's my child's (birth father) take my daughter without my permission, and I have proof he does drugs around her and they still let her go with him when I go to school. I've been with my current boyfriend (it's actually a transgender) since my daughter was born since May of 2017. I've known him before I even knew I was pregnate with my daughter. My mother says she disowns me, because I keep putting my foot down to her because I want MY DAUGHTER SAFE, and not near her real bilogical father. She thinks my current boyfriend is her father. We're getting married once I turn 18, already have the date and the state we plan on getting married in. My mother says if I gave my daughter to my boyfriend since he has a child proof house and has bought things for me and my daughter over the past year, that she will charge him of kidnapping, is that even a thing if I gave him permission to take my child? I turn 17 in less than 50 days. My current boyfriend is trying to find a way to get me emancipated BUT it will be hard considering the fact my parents took my job and all my freedom away from me!? My boyfriend owns two cars, one he gave to me and is just awaiting to sign the title over to me once I'm moved out, can I move out without having my parents charging my friends or boyfriend as harboring a run away? They've told me to get off of the house numbers of times, but told me if I walked out the door with MY daughter they will charge me for kiddnappping and for running away, when they don't have custody of my daughter . Please help.. I just want to be safe, I want to continue to finish school, I need to have my job back . I need out of that house.

    Comment


    • ccsmod5
      ccsmod5 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey,
      Thank you so, so much for reaching out. It takes a lot of courage to reach out for help and you must be an extraordinarily strong person. It sounds like you want the best for your daughter and that your boyfriend has been a source of support for you. From what you’ve described, it sounds like there’s quite a bit of emotional and physical abuse going on and you don’t ever deserve to be treated this way.
      You absolutely never deserve to be slapped, punched, or threatened. You are not “ungrateful,” and what your parents have done is not right. We’re not legal experts, but generally a situation like this would constitute legal abuse. You have the right to file an abuse report in this situation and can do that by letting the police know what’s going on or by confiding in a teacher/guidance counselor/coach. You can also make an abuse report yourself by calling the National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-422-4453. It can be helpful to have pictures if your parents have ever left marks. If you give us a call at 1-800-786-2929, we’re also able to help you make that report as well.
      You’re asking good questions about what your parents are allowed to do regarding your daughter. Again, we’re not legal experts, but generally speaking you should be able to dictate who your daughter can stay with. Taking her with you should not constitute kidnapping since you are her legal guardian. That being said, the only people who can really answer those questions for sure are your local police or a lawyer. You might consider looking into legal aid resources in your area for more concrete answers. If you’re having trouble locating that resources, you can always give us a call.
      It sounds like you’re wanting to get out of your home situation, which is valid considering the circumstances. You deserve to feel safe and supported in your home and it’s terrible that your family isn’t giving you those things. One option is to stay with a friend or another family member with your parents’ permission. You also mentioned that you were interested in emancipation and that your parents made you quit your job. Again, we’re not legal experts but there may still be a possibility of emancipation if you have someone who is able to support you and your daughter (like your boyfriend) and because you are a parent. Again, a lawyer would have more information about what that process looks like.
      Lastly, if you feel that you and your daughter are unsafe at home it is always an option to leave. Your safety is our first priority. You know your situation best and if you need to get out of there, that’s okay. So you know, running away is not a crime; it is only a status offense and would generally not have any legal consequences. If you leave, your parents would have the right to file a runaway report and if the police find you, they may bring you home. If you let them know that there’s abuse going on at home, they are supposed to investigate that situation and are not supposed to return you home until they have investigated the situation. There is a possibility that they may allow you to remain where you are, but again that’s a question that only your local police would have an answer to.
      Again, thank you so much for reaching out. You are brave, strong, and resilient and you deserve hope and happiness. Your child deserves to feel safe as well and you’re doing a great thing by trying to get to a safe situation. If you ever want to talk about your situation specifically or try to figure out your options, please don’t hesitate to reach out to us at 1-800-786-2929. We’re here 24/7 to listen and to help. Best of luck to you and stay safe.
      Last edited by ccsmod5; 02-03-2018, 10:37 PM.

  • #65
    I'm sorry, I'm the one who left the message who lives in Kansas City MO, and my parents took everything away from me. I'm not aloud to go outside of my house. They took the door off my bedroom, and the bathroom in my room. My mother watches me get dressed and undressed and does a house search to make sure I don't have a cellular device to call the cops or take pictures of anything. My parents raid my room and then makes me clean up after their mess. They have literally turned me into their maid. All because I told them they can't control where my daughter may or may not go. I am using a laptop, that I have for school, they don't know I'm messaging you guys off of it.. if they did they said they would put me into the mental hospital if they found I I told anyone about how they're treating me. They let my older brother drop out of highschool at 16, and move into his 13 year old girlfriend's house when he was 16. But I can't move out. I don't really understand. They don't let me go to school of I have bruises or they make me put ice packs to make the bruising go down before I do have to go to school. They go to my boyfriend's house everyday and my boyfriend has a restraining order against them, because of how they're treating me. They're treating him just as bad. They track his car down everywhere. They follow him and tell me about it. He's eventually taking them to court because he ended up losing one of his two jobs because of slander caused from my parents. He was a manager and worked around cash and said he steals things and it got back to him work and he lost it, even though he's never stole a day of his life. My parents aren't allowing me to see him or speak to him. I'm not aloud to have friends. My mother won't let any of my friends see my daughter, only her birth father, and he does drugs around her and I can't get the evidence on him because I no longer have my phone because of my parents... I feel like I'm living in hell, and I just want to be on my own, my mother and father has talked to my counselor at school and the juvinile officer at my school and in my schooling area... And they said it's a siblings fight when they allow my brother to punch me even when my daughter is in my arms!!! It's horrible. I just want to have a job again, I want to finish school. My parents have my brothers friends stalking me at school and making threats. No where expect with my boyfriend and his family is a safe place for me. The cops are taking my mothers side.. and saying I need to obey and say yes ma'am and no ma'am, no sir yes sir. And just suck it up. I'm stressed... My daughter is stressed.. and I'm heart broken. I don't know what to do... My mother takes my daughter to her boyfriend's house, and he has bed bugs and fleas... And my daughter is allergic to them and gets ate up Everytime she's over there... I don't want to lose my daughter because I have two unfit parents... They don't have jobs.. apparently my father is dying because he does drugs.. my mother's mother's boyfriend does drugs and he's creepy.. I don't know what to do because no one will believe me. My boyfriend and his parents are trying to get their family lawyer to help out with the situation.. but it's hard when I'm not able to get out of the house to even go to the store so I could talk to the lawyer as well...

    Sorry I'm not writing these in the same message, it's the one from KC MO once again. I just keep coming up with more to ask, im very sorry I'm scatter brained lately... But you said I can press charges on my family? How am I able to do that if they're my legal gurdians and how would I press charges on my older brother who turns 18 on Valentine's day...? Am I even able to to that? Even if they're family and I live with them?... Im sorry if these questions sound stupid. They don't teach us this is school....and if I have kids at school harrassing me, how can I go about that? My older brother also keeps making threats about giving my daughter to her birth father. When her birth father has never once been in my daughter's life until the past week or two because of my mother going behind my wishes and letting him take her when he signed his rights over. Hes not aloud to see her without me being present. Can my parents get in trouble for that ? And if I moved to my boyfriend's, my parents said they will find him and press charges and say that he raped me and that he's been putting lies into my head just to see me hurt when it isn't hurting me, it's just making them seem childish. But I said before that my mother wrote a consent for me to move out before I had my daughter once I turned 17, can I still use it even if she changed her mind, EVEN though she tells me to get out of the house every day but tells me if I walk out that she will take my child from me and never let me see her again and send me to jail? I need all the answers I can get.. honestly. Thank you for taking the time to read all this... It means alot..
    Last edited by ccsmod5; 02-03-2018, 11:35 PM.

    Comment


    • ccsmod5
      ccsmod5 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey again,
      Thank you again for reaching out. Your questions are not stupid and it makes sense that you’d be “scatter brained” given that you’re in a very scary situation. We’re so so sorry to hear that your parents have lied and manipulated others in order to continue their abuse. This is not okay and we believe you. You are not alone. We’re not legal experts, so unfortunately most of the questions you ask would need to be answered by a lawyer. It sounds like your boyfriend’s family is trying to help with their own lawyer (we’re so so glad you have support in them); if you’d like to talk to that lawyer, it might be your best option to coordinate a call with that lawyer while you’re in school. It sounds like the police have not helped, either. Sometimes it can help just to tell everyone you possibly can—every teacher you have and your guidance counselors are mandated reporters. They must all report what’s been going on if you let them know. It might start to look very suspicious once there are so many reports.
      You seem very nervous about what would happen if you left home. It sounds like your mother has given you a letter, which may help when you leave. Generally speaking, it is not a crime to leave and even if you take your daughter, it is unlikely that you will go to jail. As we mentioned earlier, your safety is our priority so if you need to get out of an unsafe situation, that’s valid.
      Please, please feel free to call us anytime. We know you don’t have a phone, so you might consider calling us during school hours and borrowing someone’s phone if you can. Unfortunately due to the volume of digital contacts we get, we’re not able to respond to more than two posts from a person, but please do call if you need. Our number is 1-800-786-2929. Best of luck and stay strong!

  • #66
    I'm 16 years old and have been trying to find a way to leave my house for years. I don't have many people supporting me and I intend to leave when I turn 17. I don't want to take a chance on the people that do support me getting into legal issues for helping me. They are a great foster family and I don't want anything to happen to them. But I can't stay here anymore. What do I do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have been wanting to leave your home for years. It seems as though you have found a family that is willing to take care of you but you don't want them to get into legal trouble. Since you are under 18, there are 3 ways you could leave home. The first option would be to ask your guardian if they would allow you to move in with the family. Another option would be to contact Child Protective Services if you feel unsafe at home. The third option that you could consider is emancipation.

      We cannot tell you what to do because you are the expert in your own life, you know your situation better than we do. If you decide to leave home without your guardian's permission, they have the right to file a runaway report. With a runaway report, if the police find you they would return you home. Running away is not illegal but if you were to stay with someone else without your guardians permission they could be charged with harboring a runaway. You could talk to the family to see if they would be interested in obtaining custody of you. You could contact Child Help (1-800-422-4453) for more information on how to transfer custody.

      We hope that this information helps, if you have any questions please contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat. Good Luck !

  • #67
    Im 17 an two months can i move out in missouri

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are thinking about moving out at 17. In the state of Missouri, the age in which a person can move out is 18. In order to move out at 17, you could ask your family if they would allow you to stay with another family member or close friend. If you decide to leave home without your guardian's consent, they have the right to file a runaway report. With a runaway report, if the police find you they would return you home. Running away is not illegal but, if you decide to stay with a friend they could get charged with harboring a runaway. However, some police do not accept runaway reports for 17 year old's. You could contact your local police through their non emergency number to ask about their runaway policy. If you don't feel comfortable calling the police, we could contact them for you. Please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat if you have any questions or just need to talk.

  • #68
    Hi I’m 16 and if My parents give me their consent to move out would I be able to go to school in the state of Missouri

    Comment


    • ccsmod10
      ccsmod10 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,

      Thank you for taking the time to write to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you and your parents are okay with you moving out early! It is great that you have the support from your parents.
      You asked how you could go to school while living apart from your parent. While we are not legal experts to our knowledge if your parents give you permission to live apart from them, then you can. As far as being able to get yourself back into school in a new district, this could be a good question to ask to your Department of Education. They would be able to tell you what documents, if any that are needed to start this process.

      We want you to know that you are not alone and we will do anything we can to help you with what is going on. If you feel comfortable, you can give us a call and one of our trained liner will be happy to assist you.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

      We hope to hear from you soon.

  • #69
    My son's friend is 15 years old. His mother passed away in October and his father moved to another town, leaving his son with a friend. Things are not working out for the young man at the home, in fact they have kicked him out, so he is currently staying at our house. Do we have to go through the courts to be able to sign papers for him at school and such or may we just get a paper signed by his Father stating that he is under our care? We live in Missouri.

    Comment


    • ccsmod16
      ccsmod16 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello, thank you so much for reaching out today and for taking care of this young man. We are here to help all involved.
      We are not legal experts, so speaking to a legal resource in your area may be best for the specific laws. Here are a few we found for you: Legal Aid of Western Missouri 1-800-892-2101, Council on Families in Crisis 1-800-398-4271.
      As far as we know, this young man staying with you with his father’s permission is not an issue, however the father may need to sign the correct papers for school and medical power to be given to you for the young man.
      If you or the youth need anymore resources (shelters, counseling, more legal aid, youth centers, etc) feel free to call us 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929.
      Thank you again for helping this young man! And Thank you for reaching out for help for him and yourself!
      Last edited by ccsmod16; 03-06-2018, 02:13 PM.

  • #70
    Hi, I just turned 17 on March 2nd I don't have any issues at home. I just want to move out. And move in with my boyfriend I live in missouri. Would I be able to pull it off without parents consent?

    Comment


    • ccsmod10
      ccsmod10 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

      Since you’re a minor (under the age of 1, you’re not legally allowed to move out without your parents’ permission. Like we tell a lot of our callers and/or people that contact us, the laws on that specific subject of just leaving home and/or running away vary from state to state. Now we aren’t legal experts, but what generally what typically happens if a minor runs away, is that your parents would be able to make a runaway. You can’t be arrested for running away, and we haven’t heard of parents getting in trouble if their youth runs away either. A good way to find out exactly what the police protocols are in your city, would be to reach out to your local non-emergency police. You can ask them hypothetical questions about running away. Once you turn 18 years old, your parents can’t file you as a runaway.

      If you give us a call on our 24/7 fully confidential hotline, at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help answer some of those questions you have and could potentially help you brainstorm a solution to the issues you are having. We also have an online chat service available every night from 4:30-11:30PM CST that is available through our website (www.1800runaway.org) if you don’t feel like calling in to talk on the phone.

  • #71
    If my parents kick me out and then call the cops and say that i ran away, is that even legal to do? They can't kick me out and then call the cops and say I ran away, can they?

    Comment


    • ccsmod10
      ccsmod10 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thanks for reaching out to us this afternoon! We appreciate you taking the time to explain a bit about the help you're looking for.

      It sounds really stressful that your parents are threatening to kickyou out of the house before you turned 18. If they did kick you out, that is considered neglect, you are able to call the police and report that. We can help you do so. You can also report it to CPS.

      We offer a conference calling service, between youth and parents. If you think that there’s a way to make home life better for both you and your parents, we’re happy to help make that call with you.

      If you'd like to talk more about your situation, we are always here to listen. Our safeline is open 24/7

      Best, NRS

  • #72
    Hello.... a worried mother of a 17 year old son.
    My son left home a little over a week ago to hang out with his biological father that has NO RIGHTS to my son, he hasnt seen or been there for my son since he was born. But My son refuses to come home. He wont reply to any of my texts or calls. I'm just needing some advice on what I can do to get him home safely?! I have full sole/legal custody of my son!

    Comment


    • #73
      Hi there,

      Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We are here 24/7 to listen and to support.

      It sounds like you are in a hard situation and are unsure of where to turn. We are not legal experts, but if you have full custody of your son you should be able to call the police or contact a lawyer to bring him home. Because your son is a minor, you would have the right to call the police and have him possibly returned home. If you want help walking through either calling the police or a lawyer, you can give us a call at 1-800-786-2929.

      Best,

      NRS
      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • #74
        Hello, I’m 17 and have been getting mentally/emotionally abused on the daily by my family and I feel it’s not healthy for myself. If I went to live with my best friend or sister what would happen? will the cops take me back home even though I can’t live there for my own well being?

        Comment


        • #75
          Hi there,

          Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about how you have been feeling and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. We are not legal experts but generally speaking, if you leave while still 17, your parents could file a runaway report and you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for your sister or friend or whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a minor. One thing you can do is reach out to your local police to inquire how they handle runaway reports for 17 year olds. Some cities and departments treat them differently because a 17 year old is so close to becoming a legal adult. They could also treat your case differently if you report abuse in your home. The way to get the most accurate information would be to call your local police non-emergency number and anonymously inquire about their practices. If you need help finding this number or you want to walk through this option with a liner, we can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

          Best,

          NRS
          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

          National Runaway Safeline
          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

          Tell us what you think about your experience!
          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

          Comment

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