18 and thinking about moving out

[Unregistered]

Hi my name is Maya and I'm thinking about moving out I'm already 18 so I'm obviously legal to move out of my parents house...but to start it all off I started running away when I was 14 (way back in the Philippines) because of how my aunt treats me so I became a rebel and started doing it like as if its my hobby but I stopped doing it when we came here in America and I was already 16, on our first few months here all things were perfect I don't have problems with my mom but when there's this one time I didn't go home and didn't told her about it she got so mad at me that it felt like I was the baddest daughter in the world but we managed to talk things out but it happened again so I moved out of our house and didn't go home for like 3 months (I was already 1 then me and my mom talked and fixed things out again...on 12/28/14 I went to my friends house after work and we watched movies and I fell asleep then I woke up in the morning and I saw my mom called me 5 times and she texted me that if I don't want her house rules then I'm welcome to leave her house i really thought about it but I decided to stay with her because its almost New Year's Eve and I want to be with her, with my family but after that day my sister and mom are giving crap that they're making me feel that I'm an outcast my sisters nagging bout how i don't clean our room i mean I would clean our room but I'm too tired from but she doesn't even clean the room ): I'm stressing out should I move out again? Officially?

[ccsmod5]

Re: 18 and thinking about moving out

Dear Maya,
It sounds like things have been tense with your mom lately, due to her being angry when you are out late or overnight. You describe feeling like an outcast in your family. It must be hard to feel this way. It’s understandable that you are now considering moving out.

We cannot tell you what you should do, as these decisions are different for everyone, but we can talk to you about your options and help weigh the pros and cons. As you say, you can legally leave home at 18. However, you may still need to think about where you would go, and how you would support yourself on your own. You may also consider how your family will react if you leave home, and what if anything needs to change in order for you to stay.

If you decide that it is time to leave, you may think about what is a realistic timeline for you to get ready for living on your own. Are there things you would need to do before leaving, such as finding an apartment, a job, or someone to stay with? Do you think you would be able to discuss a timeline with your mom?

It also sounds like in the past, you have had conflicts with your mom, but they have been resolved. Are there strategies you would like to try in resolving this conflict, before you decide whether to leave home?

Please feel free to give us a call anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We would be happy to discuss these options in more depth, and to support you in making whatever choices work best for you.


Good luck!