Can my friend live with me???

[Unregistered]

I have a friend who needs a place to stay and I was wondering if it was possible if she could stay with me. She is 16 and will be 17 in December. I am 16 and we have been best friends since we were five years old. My friend's parents are divorced. She lives with her mom and her mom's boyfriend. Her mom's boyfriend is a drunk and has series bipolar and temperament issues. He abuses her mom. Her mom will not call the cops on him though. Last night he was in a temperament and started to beat my friend's mom up. My friend tried to step in and stop it. He threatened her and tried to hit her. Her mom told her to run. She took off and went to the closest homeless shelter and used their phone to call her dad. Her dad picked her up, but he isn't the best parent either because he does drugs. She is currently staying with her dad and is not allowed to live with her mom because her mom's boyfriend does not like her and doesn't want her to live there. I live in the state PA. Is it possible that my parents and I could take her in?? What kind of court and legal systems would we have to go through???

[ccsmod9]

RE: Can my friend live with me???

Thank you very much for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline; we’re here to listen and here to help. You are such a great friend for wanting to help a friend in need. We are very sorry to hear about the situation that your friend is in. It really is amazing that she has someone like you and your parents as a support system.

Here at the National Runaway Safeline, we are not qualified to give legal advice and we’re not legal experts. We can say that your friend may be viewed as a runaway if she left to Pennsylvania without the permission of her parent/legal guardian. When youth leave home without when they are under the age of majority (in most states, age 1, they are committing a status offense. Those adults who help a youth runaway may be charged with ‘harbouring a runaway.’

Since your friend is in an unsafe situation, she (or any other concerned person) has the right to file an abuse report. Abuse reports are confidential. If this is something she would like to do because she feels unsafe and threatened by her mother’s boyfriend, the phone number is 1-800-4-A-CHILD. Additionally, if your friend would like to learn more about what to expect upon filing an abuse report, here is the website:

https://www.childhelp.org/1-800-4-child-expect-call/

If your friend’s mother would give her the permission to live with your family, she could pursue giving your parents temporary guardianship. To learn more about temporary guardianship view these links below:

http://thelawdictionary.org/article/how-to-give-temporary-guardianship-of-your-child/

http://thelawdictionary.org/article/getting-temporary-guardianship-of-a-minor-child/

Your family or your friend can also go to the Law Help website to find the legal aid office near you who can provide clarity to the situation. Here it the website:

http://www.lawhelp.org/

We would love to learn more about your situation in order to provide more individualized help, you or your friend can feel free to call us. We are available 24/7 via phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY, 1-800-786-2929 or via our interactive daily chat service from 4:30pm to 11:30pm CST.

We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon!

[Unregistered]

my friends is abused

My friend is twelve and like me lives in indiana her mom abuses her by hitting her...also her mom is trying to make her homschooled so if she wanted to could she move in with me instead of living with her mother because of the abuse

[ccsmod0]

Re: Can my friend live with me???

Hello,
Thank you for reaching out to us at that National Runaway Safeline. First off we want to say that abuse whether its physical, sexual, emotional or verbal, it is never okay and no one deserves it and do have the right to report it. We want you to know that you/your friend do have the right to make a report with Child Protective Services. Child Help USA is an information and referral line that can connect you with your local CPS abuse hotline. That number is 1-800-422-4453. If you/your friend ever felt like making a report or needed help, we are here to assist with that. We understand that making an abuse report can be intimidating so if you like we can call together to provide support. If your friend does make the report and then leaves to come and stay with you it would help to have this report in. The child abuse report would show that there is something going on at home and she did not just leave because she wanted to. It shows that mom is doing something wrong and the youth is in danger. Additionally, if your friend ever need a safe place to go, we also can provide you with various resources for agencies in whatever area they are in to best help them during this difficult time. You can always call us to talk about what you are going through and receive some support. We provide free, confidential, and nonjudgmental services. Your friend is really lucky to have someone as caring as you to be looking out for them. If either of you need anything please give us a call. Everyone deserves to be respected and loved. 1-800-RUNAWAY

[Guest]

My friend is 14, and is living under a household with a very strained marriage. He is trans, firstly, and his mom chooses to disregard this, and if he told his dad, who is very homophobic and transphobic, he'd probably get endless taunted, if not beaten for it. His dad is very verbally abusive and has physically abused him before, and his parents are very negligent. They leave him at home to babysit all of his younger siblings, 4, to be exact. He usually can't contact them and doesn't know where they are. The eldest I believe is just eight, the youngest being about one or two years old. He is always taking care of these children, as well as cooking and cleaning, and if you knew more, you'd understand this family situation is terribly unhealthy for just a fourteen years old. He says he won't run away even if it's an option, but I'm just wondering, if the situation gets too much for him, could he live with my family in Florida?

[ccsmod15]

It sounds like your friend is living in a very difficult situation, with potentially abusive and negligent parents, and having to take care of his younger siblings. It's great he has someone like you in his life who understands his situation. We're glad you got in touch with us today. Your friend definitely deserves to be in an environment that is healthy and supportive, and it makes sense that you might think about whether he could live with your family. At the same time, if he runs away to live with your family without his parents' permission he can be considered a runaway and your parents could possibly have legal problems. We're wondering if there is any adult in his life he could trust to talk to about the situation. Perhaps that adult could interact with the parents to see if there are ways to improve the situation for him. He could also call us direct to talk with us at 1-800-RUNAWAY about the situation and we might be able to help him consider other options. There are also LGBT-oriented hotlines he could consider for places to talk: The Trans Lifeline is 877-565-8860, the LGBT National Youth Talkline is 800-246-7743.

[Guest]

Can my friend runaway to my house and live here? Her parents are trying to move her to Florida and she doesn't want to go.Her dad and mom treat her badly and even asked what she is still doing there. If we explained this to the police will they still make her leave? She is 15, and we need to figure this out soon. I know about all of the harboring runaways laws so we would have to call her parents and police but how can we get her to stay? We can support her financially and she has a bed here, just is that all enough?

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It seems like your friend is going through a really difficult time right now. It is great that you are reaching out on their behalf, it shows that you are a supportive friend. We are not legal experts but in most states the legal age to leave home is 18, if your friend was to leave home before turning 18 they could be considered as a runaway. In most cases if found the police would bring your friend to their legal guardian. If there is any type of abuse going on, you or your friend it by calling child protective services. You could consider trying to get permission from her parents in letting them allow your friend to stay with you. We hope this information was helpful in your situation. If you have any more questions, or would like to talk more about this situation feel free to give us a call we are available 24/7. We wish you the best of luck, remember to stay strong!
NRS

[Guest]

Hi, I’m 17 and I was wondering how I could live with my friend instead of my mom. My mother is an alcoholic and so is my uncle( he lives with us too). They’re constantly partying and being loud. They don’t do anything to help any of us. All my mom cares about is drinking and finding a sugar daddy. I’m always being verbally abused and it really messes with my mental state. Please help I’m so lost at this point.

[ccsmod3]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that you are being verbally abused- we want you to know that abuse of any kind is NEVER ok. If you ever feel unsafe, you can remove yourself from that situation or call the police.
We are by no means legal experts, but we do have some knowledge we would like to share with you. I7 is considered a minor, which means that your legal guardians are in charge of where you live. At age 18 you can make that decision as an adult. If you were to leave home without permission, there is a chance that your mom could file a runaway report. That means if you were encounter law enforcement, they will have to return you home. We can’t speak on behalf of all law enforcement, but you can always call your local non-emergency number and ask how they would handle the situation. Another option is to look into other family members that you feel safe living with- perhaps your mom would be open to you staying with them? As long as your legal guardian grants permission, you can stay.

We are 24/7 and always here to help. You can always give us a call if you need more specific info or just someone to talk to.

Best of luck, NRS

[Guest]

Hi I'm 12 and so is my friend. Shes mentally and verbally abused and told shes a mistake. Due to this she tried to commit suicide and is now in a mental hospital. Can I let her live with me without getting sued by her parents???

[ccsmod5]

Thank you so much for reaching out and trying to help out your friend. That is so kind of you; your friend is lucky to have someone like you in her corner. It must be very scary that your friend is in the hospital and it’s kind of you to try to help her. No one ever deserves to be abused. Below, we’ve listed some options you might try.
1) You mention that your friend is being abused. Anyone can report abuse to Child Protective Services. It could be a good idea to talk to adults you trust about your worries. That could be a teacher, guidance counselor, or perhaps a parent. Another option is to call Child Help at 1-800-422-4453.
2) You wrote that your friend attempted to commit suicide. One thing you can do to help is to be there for her. For example, it could be nice to ask about how she’s feeling, what she’s been thinking, and just generally letting her know that you care. Friendship is a powerful force. Another great resource for you or your friend to call when she is feeling suicidal is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.
3) You also asked a good question: can your friend live with you? Since your friend is a minor, she needs permission from her parents or guardians to stay somewhere else. If she did come to stay with you for safety reasons, that is understandable. You might want to keep in mind that her parents can file a runaway report and if the police are able to find her they may return her home. There is also a possibility that your parents (not you) could be charged with harboring a runaway. That’s not really something we hear about that often, though.
Thank you again for reaching out. Feel free to pass our number, 1-800-786-2929, to your friend and feel free to call yourself. We are here to offer resources, support, and a listening ear. We are here 24/7. Good luck!
--NRS

[Guest]

Hi, my friend is 10 and her stepdad curses at her and yells at her every day, and her mom wont break up with him. what should me and her do?

[ccsmod1]

Hi,

Sorry to hear that your friend is having a hard time with her stepdad. Everyone is entitled to have a safe and secure environment growing up, especially at such a young age.

One option your friend might consider is speaking with her mom and/or other relatives about what's going on at home and why she doesn't feel safe around her step father. Sometimes having these hard conversations with other relatives can help with getting a parent to understand how their child is thinking. Talking to a teacher, family friend or other trusted adult is another option.

If your friend feels like the cursing and yelling is rising to the point of child abuse, your friend always has the right to file a child abuse report. She can do this with many people who are called "mandated reporters." This means if your friend gives information to one of these people (like a police officer, a teacher, NRS, a doctor, etc.) then that person has to file an abuse report with the State.

If you'd like to discuss further, you or your friend can reach us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or we have online chat available. We're open 24x7.

Best.
NRS

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[Guest]

My friend said they wanted to live with me because their parents are super homophobic and they are scared of their parents is it legal to take them in if we live in colorado

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you are a supportive friend who is doing their best to help a friend in need!

While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If someone is under the age of 18 and leaves home, their parent/guardian may file a runaway report and that person may be returned home. It is definitely possible that whoever that person stays with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police might be able to provide some further information specific to the situation.

We understand that home may not be the safest place for an individual, as you described in your post. If your friend is ever at risk of any danger or is feeling unsafe, you can encourage your friend to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. They can also check out the website www.nationalsafeplace.org or text the word “safe” with their current location to 4HELP (44357). They will right away receive the nearest Safe Place location that they can go to or they can be connected via texting to a trained counselor.

Please let your friend know that they can reach out to NRS by phone or by chat, and we would be happy to talk more with them about their situation and to find resources in their local area that might be helpful. We also know that it can be stressful to support a friend who is going through a difficult time, so please don't forget to take care of yourself as well and reach out to us or someone who you trust if you need to talk about what has been going on.

Be safe,

NRS