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I'm 17 and unhappy

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  • I'm 17 and unhappy

    Hi I'm 17 and unhappy living with my mom and her boyfriend. We've lived in his house for about 10 years now and I hate it everyday. I want to move out and live with my friend and her dad. I don't know what to do I'm about to be 18 here in 3 months and 18 days and I just don't want to want anymore. I'm always done and hate it here only because of my mom boyfriend.

  • #2
    RE: I'm 17 and unhappy

    Hello there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us here on our public bulletin board. From what you have told us, it sounds like you have been going through a very tough time living at home. It must be very frustrating not to be able to feel comfortable living in our own home. What has been going on at home between your mother, her boyfriend and yourself? Seems like things have just been going pretty rough for you to the point where you are feeling unhappy.

    Now you stated in your message that you have been thinking about first running away to live with your with your friend and her family. Unfortunately, here at the NRS we cannot tell you in definite terms on what would happen for someone at the age of 17 years old to runaway. Laws on that specific subject vary from state to state, so our advice would be call your local non-emergency police number to get more information on that. What typically happens though; your parents are able to make a runaway report in the event that you do run away, but since it’s only considered a statues offense the only thing that would happen is that the police will pick you up and bring you back home. Again this does depend on your specific state laws and police policy. Sometime police will treat a 17 year old as an adult, but other times it will be not until 18. So that is why we suggest that you contact your local police to get a definite answer.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      I'm 17 and I hate living in my house. I've lived with my aunt by myself for several years up until recently. We have the whole family out here in Utah. My aunt has a little bit of a temper sometimes and has hit me before and even shaved my head because I got in "trouble". I've run away several times in the past. And she refused to let my get my drivers license, so now I'm turning 18 in 7 months and I don't even have my learners permit or a birth certificate to go get it. She's stolen things from me like my 1,200 dollars from my savings account and she's a pathological liar so I have zero trust for her. I'm genuinely not happy in my house and I don't really have any freedom. I don't turn 18 until December of this year. I've made it very clear to my boyfriend that I'm not happy here and we made a deal that once I'm 18 I can go live with him and his mom. But I don't know if I can even make it another 7 months.

      Comment


      • ccsmod3
        ccsmod3 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello and thanks for reaching out on our forum. We’re sorry to hear you’ve been feeling unhappy living at home with your aunt. You don’t deserve to be hit and it sounds frustrating to have your head shaved and not get your license. Even at 17, you have a right to report any abuse or neglect with your local child protective services and/or law enforcement. If you are interested in making a report, we can help you with that process. You can also call 1-855-323 DCFS (3237) if you are comfortable. You deserve to feel safe in your home even if it’s just for the next several months.

        It sounds like you’ve got an arrangement set up with your boyfriend and his mom for when you turn 18. You also mentioned you aren’t sure you can make it the 7 months until you turn 18 and that you’ve run away several times in the past. Please keep in mind we are not here to tell you which decision to make, although we do care about your safety. It sounds like you have an idea of what might happen should you decide to run away since you have done so before. If you’d like to discuss your plan should you run away this time or if you think there are any other options your aunt would agree to for these next 7 months, we would be happy to listen.

        Please feel free to reach out to us directly either through our Live Chat (if you prefer to talk online) or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we can continue discussing your situation. Best of luck!

    • #4
      I'm 17 and I feel unhappy in my home... I live with my aunt and uncle. I get treated like crap here by my aunt and I feel worthless here. I get called names by my aunt like "stupid and big" And it makes me feel like crap. I'm thinking about leaving because I can't take it anymore. I'm too scared to reach out to the cops because the cops in my area don't care.. I'll be 18 in 6 months.. I don't think I can wait that long. I've been pushed through a wall before.. And kicked.. And I just feel like they don't want me here anymore I feel like a nuisance.. I feel like I get in everyone's way.

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        We are so sorry to hear you are going through such an awful time at home. What you are describing sounds quite serious, actually. It definitely would be considered physical, emotional, and verbal abuse. What was done to you is not your fault and you deserve to be safe and treated with respect. That said, here are some things to consider.

        One option you have is to file an abuse report on what's going on at home. While the local police might have been unresponsive in the past, filing with the state authorities might lead to better outcomes. We know sometimes that is a hard choice to make, but you do have that right. If an abuse report is made it would likely lead to a child protective services investigation. They would likely interview you and your aunt and uncle and determine what the best course of action is. If things are deemed detrimental to your well being, you could be removed from the home, though this is not always the case by any means. If you want to file an abuse report you can do that through your state's child abuse reporting hotline or through Child Help (www.childhelp.org) at 1-800-422-4453. You can also file through us here at National Runaway Safeline. But again, whether you decide to file or not is up to you. We honor whatever decision you make and support you either way.

        It makes a lot of sense that you would want to leave home. Just know that if you do leave without permission your aunt and uncle could file a runaway report on you. Running away isn’t a crime, but it is a status offense like breaking curfew. If found, the police would likely bring you back home. Perhaps more seriously, anyone you stay with could be accused of harboring a runaway, which is a misdemeanor in most localities. We don’t share this information to persuade you in any way, but only to give you some things to think about. Of course, if you got permission to leave that probably wouldn't lead to any legal issues at all.

        However, there may be some shelters in your area that might be able to work with you so that you could stay there at 17. The best way for us to connect you with them or to help you in general would be if you give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us via www.1800runaway.org. In all likelihood, there are things we can do for your and resources we might be able to connect you with. We are a confidential and safe place to talk and we hope to hear from you soon.

        All the best,
        NRS
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