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16, in need of assistance in emancipation

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  • 16, in need of assistance in emancipation

    Hi, I'm 16 years old and will be 17 in less than a month. I grew up living a pretty good life with my parents and my younger brother who is seven. My brother means everything to me and always has. On may 9th i got into a verbal argument with my father, which had never happened before, he was my best friend because my mom never did anything besides sleep. Out of nowhere he grabbed me by the hair and continued to drag me around and beat me, as i screamed for help and my mother watched and did not help me. No one helped me. I finally escaped and ran to my boyfriend's house. My boyfriend and i have been together since I was fourteen. He's a united States marine reservist and he's amazing and supportive of everything i do, his family and i are also very close. After i got to my boyfriend's house i realized my brother was on his way back to my house from school, with my irate father still there, i immediately had my boyfriend's step dad drive me back to the house so i could make sure he was safe and so i could grab some things to stay out of the house for the night at my boyfriend's, whose house I'd slept at many times before, the cops were called because my dad attempted to pepper spray my boyfriend's step dad. The cops arrive and don't help me at all, they even go as far as to say that I'm wasting their time, I'm just a piece of paperwork, and lastly forging my signature on a false report. I stayed at my boyfriend's for two nights, allowed by my mother, i was told to be home at noon the next day so at around 11 i contacted child protective services and they said they'd come to my house within the day. When i returned home my father was storming around, slamming things and saying harsh things toward me. When cps arrived my dad was furious. he kept screaming at me and scaring me to death, he nailed my window shut and slept outside my door so i couldn't escape, cps didn't do anything but take a report, so i was left all on my own with this man who was violent and abusive. My aunt contacted my mom and offered for me to stay at her house for a few weeks and after that time my mom said she would help me become emancipated if i still wished to do so. My dad then said he wanted me permanently out of the house and he was going to court to have me removed. I packed all my things and moved to my aunts house. This is where i live now even though the courts didn't do anything when my dad went. My dad made up stories that i had been beating him since i was seven, that i broke his knee, shoulder, and threatened to throw him down the stairs. None of these things happened. My aunt filed for joint custody of me and got it. I don't like living here because it makes me uncomfortable and unhappy, i cry all night every night because everything is wrong. My aunt doesn't like any men, she's divorced, and hates my boyfriend for no reason. It's very hard to live here. There are so many things I'm not used to and I'm just uncomfortable. I don't like feeling like a slave being traded between people and it really has me very depressed with everything else that's going on. My boyfriend's family says i can stay with them and that would make me much more comfortable. I would like to become emancipated because i have a place to go and a job and will be a senior in highschool, my road test is scheduled for this coming Monday so the next step is getting a car. I am very independent and need to be emancipated so i can be in control of what i do and do not do and it would really set my mind at ease. I live in new York and have been told there is no set emancipation laws here. I'm reaching out to see if you can please help me follow the correct steps in achieving emancipation. I understand you can't give any legal guidance but i just need to know more about emancipation in new York and all the government websites are really confusing. I hate feeling stuck. Thank you so much for your time .

  • #2
    re: 16, in need of assistance in emancipation

    Hi there,

    Thanks for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. You sound like a really strong individual as you have been through a lot of changes in the last few months. You seem like a really great older sibling to be thinking about your brother's safety. It must be hard to have your relationship with your dad change so much. It is good that you have a support system with your boyfriend and his family. Having a support system is important, especially when you are going through so many changes.

    Emancipation can be a complicated process. You are correct that New York does not have a formal emancipation process. There are two agencies, located in New York, that you could reach out to in order to learn about the correct steps. The first one is the Brookhaven Youth Bureau; you can reach them at 631-654-7878. They operate 9:00am-4:30pm Monday to Friday. The second resource is Dutchese Co. Youth Services; you can reach them at 845-486-3665.

    If you need further resources or want to talk more about your situation, we are here 24 hours a day. You can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

    Good luck to you,

    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      further questions

      Hi, thanks for your quick response i just have another question, although there isn't any formal emancipation in NY, am i still able to be "informally" emancipated? I'm not sure what to ask or expect when i contact the Brookhaven youth bureau. Would i have to go out of state to become legally emancipated? And if so, i would be considered a runaway and can be taken home by police and whoever is with me could be arrested for bringing a minor over state lines, correct? I'm sorry for asking so many questions i just need help. Thanks again for reading this.

      Comment


      • #4
        16, need assistance in emancipation

        Hi again,

        Unfortunately NRS is not an expert in the legal field so we can only give general information on juvenile law.

        From what we understand in general you must be emancipated from where you reside so if you are considered a resident of New York than the probability is the emancipation would have to be decided in a New York juvenile or family court.
        Since there seems to be no emancipation law in New York it might be best to talk with one of the agency referrals we provided about informal emancipation in New York state. Does that make sense?

        If you are feeling unsure about what to say when you call Brookhaven Youth Bureau you might consider using the NRS conference calling service. One of the liners at NRS would be happy to help translate any questions you might have.

        For example does New York state have laws for emancipation?
        Would someone be allowed to move out legally from their parent or guardians home at age 16 or 17?
        Can they legally be forced to move back home?

        If you would like to do a conference call contact 1-800-Runaway (786-2929)
        NRS also has live chat at www.1800Runaway.org from 4:30pm until 11:30pm 7 days a week.
        How does that sound?

        There are laws in most states against aiding and or harboring a youth considered to be a runaway.
        Once again to get more specifics on this you might ask this question if you decide to contact the referral given to you.

        Brookhaven Youth Bureau: 631-654-7878. They operate 9:00am-4:30pm Monday to Friday.

        Dutchese Co. Youth Services; you can reach them at 845-486-3665.


        We hope the information helps and we thank you again for reaching out to NRS.
        Take Care
        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment

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