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16 wanting to run away, emotionally abusive father

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  • 16 wanting to run away, emotionally abusive father

    My father has been emotionally and verbally abusive to me, my older sister, and my step mom for as long as I can remember, and recently it has gotten worse. This past month it seems that every day he becomes more and more angry. Hes gotten to the point where he yells about every little thing, even if nobody messed up. When hes yelling he will hit the wall right by me or if its in the car he will hit the center console. It used to be every now and then but now its every day and on a higher level. Im a 16 year old girl and I was wanting to know if I would be able to run away to a friends house and refuse to come back until he got anger management counceling. I dont feel safe around him. His anger is through the roof and Im afraid it might get to the point where he will hurt someone if I dont do something. He is professionally trained in martial arts and my step mom is physically disabled. My older sister doesnt live with us anymore but she has reported physical emotional and verbal abuse before and nobody did anything. We also have a 10 year old boy and 8 year old girl living with us. Can the police force me to go back if I leave? And can they require him to take tharapy?

  • #2
    RE: 16 wanting to run away, emotionally abusive father.

    Hello,

    Thank you for taking the time out of your day to contact us here at the National Runaway Safeline. This sounds like a very hard situation for you to be in right now. It seems like you are trying to do the right thing by getting your father help with his anger. That’s very brave of you to do that and it shows that you really care about both him and your siblings’ health and safety.

    You have stated in your message that your older sister once tried to report him to Child Protective Services, but nothing really happened with that. Have you tried on your own to contact any social worker or therapy agencies? You definitely don’t have to be treated that way. Especially when you’re at home; a place that is supposed to be a safe and loving place for you. You always have the right to report any abuse to your local police department or child protective service in your state. If you don’t feel like you’re not comfortable or if you might not know how to do that, you can always call us anytime you want. There is always someone here to help you.

    Unfortunately, here at the NRS we cannot tell you in definite terms on what would happen for someone at the age of 16 years old to runaway because we aren’t legal experts. Laws on that specific subject vary from state to state, so our advice would be call your local non-emergency police number to get more information on that. What typically happens though; your father are able to make a runaway report in the event that you do run away, but since it’s only considered a statues offense the only thing that would happen is that the police will pick you up and bring you back home. Through you do have the option of talking to a police officer about the abuse that has been going on recently.

    It seems like a very hard situation for you and we are glad you contacted NRS. We are here to help and listen. You can also call into our 24hour hotline (1.800.RUNAWAY) for a more immediate response, as well as connect to some resources that we might have on hand. Perhaps even get you into contact with some of the counseling services that you were thinking about for your father’s anger. Another service that we offer here at the NRS is our chat room which is offered from 4:30pm to 11:30pm/CST (www.1800RUNAWAY.org). If you feel more comfortable with that opinion we are more than welcome to contact us through that.

    Best of luck and look forward to hearing from you.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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    • #3
      I need help. I got a Abusive dad!!! And I ran away to a bfs house and he abused me too so sadly I came back here I was starved to death at my ex house and now I have to deal with my abusive dad and I need help bad!! Can someone on here Tell me How to leave my ******* dad?? And also can someone please help me please !!! I really need help bad((((
      Last edited by ccsmod0; 06-23-2016, 10:50 PM.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: 16 wanting to run away, emotionally abusive father

        Hello,
        First off we want to say that abuse whether its physical, sexual, emotional or verbal, it is never okay and you do not deserve it and do have the right to report it. You might want to think about making a report with Child Protective Services. Child Help USA is an information and referral line that can connect you with your local CPS abuse hotline. That number is 1-800-422-4453. If you ever felt like making a report or needed help, we are here to assist with that. We understand that making an abuse report can be intimidating so if you like we can call together to provide support.
        We are sorry to hear that the people that you have been turning to end up hurting you. We want you to know that you are not alone and that there is tons of support out there for you one resource that we can provide for you is the number to the National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-3224 They can talk to you more about what you have been through and try to help you find services in your area.
        If you feel comfortable you can give us a call and we can discuss all of your options 1-800- RUNAWAY
        Best,
        NRS
        Last edited by ccsmod0; 06-23-2016, 10:56 PM.
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          I ran away from my emotionally abusive and sometimes physically abuse dad and he smacked me so hard I heard my neck crack. Recently he moved two states away- after getting kicked out for fighting with the landlord. We were living with my step mom and four other sibling one is 4 one is 9 one is 10 and one is 12- also I am a 12 year old girl. He always municipalities me and my 12 year old sister and my step mom. He has told me I’m ********ing stupid and a ********ing idiot. Before him, my dad, and my mom broke up he chocked her. I was scared for my life when I ran away. I went to visit my grandparents in Washington- for some reason he is living there now. When I was there he grabbed me by he back of my neck and slammed me against a wall and then pushed me too the ground. I walked out of the garage whit tears in my eyes and went up stars to go to bed. Later that night at 10:0 pm I went to get some water- I will regret that for the eat of my life. My grandma was sitting at the table- also my little brother, Elliott, who is 10 years old was going to sleep with me instead of my dad. My grandma asked where my brother was sleeping, I said with me. She said that my dad want to sleep with my brother, I just told her he doesn’t get to. Then she FLIPPED OUT telling me that my mom used my dad and that all my mom wanted was money. My mom raised me for the past 3 1/2 Years. Then I went to bed- I couldn’t sleep- do I went back down stairs at like 12:00-12:30 ish assuming that everyone would be in bed. My dad just came into the house- he sat me down and told me he loved me and then was all nice to me. Hen next morning I went down to the kitchens assuming he would be in the same mood. He just said “ good morning savannah” nothing else. I am sick of him treating me like ********. I don’t ever want to see him again. I need to know what to do. PLEASE HELP!

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            We are so sorry you have been so severely abused by your father and also mistreated by your grandma. You absolutely do not deserve any of that. You have the right to file an abuse report on all of this very bad behavior directed at you. If you give us your state, we can give you the number to call to report this. Or, if you'd like to file a report through us, we can do that too. You would just need to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Whether you decide to report or not is up to you. We never tell anyone what to do. But you have been severely abused and you have the right to be safe. We don't know all that would happen if you chose to report, but it's possible you could be placed in a much safer environment if you do. But that's your call. You can also file a report through the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453.

            There are a lot of questions we have about your post. You are very brave to open up to us about this. We'd like to help but would probably need a little more information from you about what's going on. For instance, you say you ran away, but we don't know where you are currently staying. So, if you need to find a place, we can possibly help with that. The more support you have from others, the better. Perhaps also there are other adults that you trust that you can talk to about this: a family member, teacher, school counselor, pastor, or anyone that you feel comfortable talking to. Again, you can always count on us for a hearing ear and support. If you call us, we can help you figure out what your options are and what you'd like to do next. We are confidential, by the way. Please be safe. We hope to hear from you soon. Again our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY. Or you can chat with us by clicking on the chat feature on our website: https://www.1800runaway.org/.

            Best,
            NRS

        • #6
          My dad calls me names when I mess up on an project and he calls me lazy. He says I don't think enough, even though it's just a project I'm supposed to be working on my own. I have other examples but I'm running out of time to type, I'm 12 and I'm trying to make a life changing decision. If I run away I can't get help because my family is too far away. What do I do? I need help. If I don't get taken away I fear I'll be abused worse.
          Last edited by ccsmod4; 10-13-2020, 01:34 AM.

          Comment


          • ccsmod4
            ccsmod4 commented
            Editing a comment
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

            We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
            It sounds like you’re fearing that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
            We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
            You don’t deserve to be called names or judged by your dad.
            Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
            Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.
            NRS is here to listen and here to help.
            We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

            If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). You are welcome to discuss your situation and talk about possible options for help. What you did today by reaching out was great. Good job.

            We hope to hear from you soon.

            Take care,
            NRS
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