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16 year old living in an emotionally abusive house

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  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. What you are going through sounds truly awful and we are so sorry that you are being treated in such a hurtful and inappropriate manner. It is absolutely not okay for your parents to call you those names (or any) and it is even more not okay for them to threaten to physically harm you. We want you to know that we hear you and we are here for you and that no matter what, you are worth it. It is hard for us to talk about what your options are without knowing more about your situation. One option could be to file an abuse report with your state’s CPS or DCFS agency. If you want to learn more about that option and more about what reporting might look like, you can always give a call to the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. Otherwise, please give us a call on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org if you would like to talk about what other options there might be and how we can best support you.

    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 16 and my parents call me terrible names they say they’re stupid ugly retarded mental worthless lazy the devil I wish I never had you your mistake all of these terrible terrible things and I hear them every single day when I wake up to when I go to bed I don’t want to live in my house anymore I don’t feel safe even though my parents just call me names sometimes my dad said that he is going to kill me and sometimes I think he will and every time I try to go to so I called the police everyone takes his side and I have no self-esteem I think so little of myself I am hurting on the inside so much I feel like I am not worth it i I don’t belong here don’t feel safe I just need help

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there, we are glad you reached out! Sounds like home if super stressful and really taking a toll on your mental health.
    You do not deserve to be called fat, ugly, stupid by anyone, especially your mom. That must feel so hurtful! You mentioned your friends are supportive. Perhaps there are other adults who could support you too: a school counselor, teacher, neighbor, aunt/uncle, grandparent, or cousin. You could also consider finding a local counselor to speak to. We have a lot of youth-friendly services in our database. If you want some resources in your local area, call or chat us anytime: 1-800-786-2929 or chat through the link at the top of the website.

    It sounds like your parents are not as supportive as your wished they were. This can be very hard to deal with and handle. You are very brave for reaching out and talking about this! For more support, you can call or chat us here, we are 24/7. The Crisis Text Line is also 24/7 and can be contacted by texting the number 741-741.

    You have shown a lot of strength in reaching out! Please call or chat if we can provide more support or resources!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    13 and being emotionally and verbally abused

    Hello, I am 13 and and can't stand living at home anymore. My mom has constantly told me i'm fat, stupid and ugly. My parents will yell at me and then act like everything is okay after. If i cry My dad tells me I am to sensitive and need to grow thick skin. Since I was 10, my parents have been disregarding my opinions calling them stupid. My best friends believe me and are telling me to get help, but i'm afraid to. My parents are nice some of the time, which I guess is why i haven't done anything about it. My parents have caused me to have depression and I just don't know what to do anymore. My parents have also never supported any of my dreams. My dad just has started criticizing everything i do. It just makes me sad when i see have dinner at my friends house, and see her family watching TV together talking and i wish i had that. I just don't know what to do.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there, thanks for posting. It sounds like you are handling quite a lot on your own right now with the pregnancy, your parents, and a new engagement. It takes a lot of strength to reach out! We are here to help!

    You mentioned abuse and your dad threatening to kill you. That sounds like an unsafe environment for sure! Child Help is the national child abuse hotline and can provide more information on that: 1-800-422-4453, childhelp.org. We can also help file an abuse report, only if you want to do so. Otherwise we are completely confidential and anonymous and you can call (1-800-786-2929) or live chat through this website anytime, 24/7.

    You also mentioned how much your dad's abuse and mom's mental health has affected you. Seems like it has all taken quite a toll, which is so understandable! We are here 24/7 if you want to talk more about this. You may also consider finding a local therapist or support group here: samhsa.gov. We have a database of resources too if you wanted to find more youth services near you that are affordable and accessible.

    As far as leaving home, we are not legal experts. Generally, you can do so with permission, through CPS or through emancipation which can be a bit of a lengthy and expensive process. We are not legal experts, but can give you general info and refer you to legal aid.

    As far as your dad dismissing your self-harm and suicidal thoughts, that is very hurtful and we are so sorry you are experiencing that! twloha.com has information, blog articles, resources, etc written all about self-harm from others who have experienced it. If you are ever in crisis and feel like you may hurt yourself, the national suicide prevention lifeline is also an option, 24/7 by phone or live chat online: 1-800-273-8255 suicidepreventionlifeline.org.

    Thank you again for reaching out. Your situation sounds very stressful, especially being pregnant. We have loads of resources for housing, pregnancy, youth services, etc so call or chat to talk more directly: 1-800-786-2929.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Im 16, abused, engaged, and pregnant.

    Hey, I'm 16 and I live in Kansas. My parents are separated and re-married but both households are extremely toxic. My boyfriend has been my lifeline through this all and has been a total sweetheart to me. We recently became pregnant and as he is almost 18, he has offered for me to go live with him and his family. My dad has awful anger issues and has said some pretty nasty things that I will never forget. Things such as talking down on my self-harm and suicidal thoughts. He has an extremely bad temper and when he found out I was pregnant he called me a ********ing whore and was screaming at my face at 6 AM. My mother on the other hand is mentally ill and extremely narcissistic. She guilt trips me constantly and tries to make me feel bad for her life turning out awfully. Neither household is healthy to raise a baby in, my father wouldn't ever allow my fiance (baby's father) to be around me or the baby, and my mother is very contradicting in her own actions and let's my bum of a stepdad rule the house and make our lives hell. My father had previously threatened that he would kill me if I ever became a teen mom, and seeing as that is now my reality, I am not comfortable in his house. He is extremely strict and we can't eat certain foods without getting into trouble, or talk to friends late at night, or even get up in the middle of the night to get a drink or use the bathroom. I can't see how I'm supposed to raise a baby with either of these living conditions. Both of my parents are emotionally and verbally abusive, to the point where I can't remember the last time I wasn't depressed. I guess my question is, would it be smart to move in with my fiance and his family (who are very supportive and understanding about everything) and if so, could my father take any legal action to cause drama between both families (as I assume he will try)? My fiance doesn't want his kid living in either of these conditions and I don't either but I also want to raise my baby alongside him instead of our baby living with my fiance until I'm 18.

    Would much appreciate any advice, thank you.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline and sharing your experience with us. It is a courageous step to take that is not always easy. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation. Becoming pregnant and feeling unprepared or unsure of what to do next can be a scary thing to face. We are always here to listen and help as best as possible. Taking this step by step can help to make this stressful time a little less overwhelming. Identifying people in your life that you can trust to support you during this time may be a good start to seeking help and exploring your options.If you suspect that you may be pregnant or are currently unsure, confirming pregnancy is a good first step. This can look like purchasing a pregnancy test after you have missed a menstrual period or you can get this confirmation by possibly going to a local clinic for a blood test. If you are pregnant, proper health care can be important in whatever you choose to do. One way to reach a doctor and find useful resources that specialize in women’s health/pregnancy is to contact Planned Parenthood at 1800-230-7526 or go to their website at https://www.plannedparenthood.org/. If you’d like additional support or resources please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY 24 hours, 7 days a week or chat with us online by going to www.1800RUNAWAY.org.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My names paige I’m 16.
    im currently 9. Weeks pregnant
    I live with my dad whom got full custody of me because my mother is unstable .
    my father is very mentally abusive . He wakes me up 9AM cleaning my room while mummmering words about me or hell wake me up to tell me about how we’re broke n he doesn’t kno how I’m going to raise a baby. Before I got pregnant I smoked weed . A lot. My dad provided money . I’ll never hear the end of that. To him I’m a loser I will get nowhere like my mother he loves to say . I’m 16 everyone else my age is out late n I have to leave my baby daddies house at 10PM on the dot. He is munipulitive . I don’t have a pair of socks with out a hole in it but he complains everyday we’re broke but he goes out every Friday Saturday night to drink n snort coke n but strippers /: I’m very mature for my age . I’ve been put this this mental abuse since I turned 13 and I got placed here . My brothers n sisters don’t live with me but they all know exactly what I’m going tru and want me with them but they live out of state n I could’ve leave my baby daddy.. my dad compares me to my mother n her side of the family making me feel belittled like nothing . He tells me when he feels like dying he makes me want to die as well . I want go leave home so bad I’m so sad sitting on my bathroom floor jus holding my baby belly wanting to die /: he tells me I can’t leave home and that if I do he’ll call the cops tell them my bf has weed on him or something and that stops me from leaving what can I possibly do I need out or I can’t Handel another day ..

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    You mentioned some things that raise concern for your safety and well-being. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. It generally ranges from no danger (the youth stays in the home, some services are given, and the case is closed), moderate danger (they will provide family services with possible temporary displacement) and high danger (they will remove the youth from the home and offer certain services).

    If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

    Please be safe and reach out soon by phone or chat so that we may help.
    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I’m not scared to tell you who I am. My name is Katelyn rose and my mom is abusive. If I say something she doesn’t like she hits me. If I try to tell her about my depression and anxiety she tells me that I need to go on medicine and to shut up about it. She rolls her eyes when I tell her I’m having a panic attack she says I am being dramatic. I’m 16 turning 17 in August I can’t live here anymore mental health is deteriorating fast. It seems like all I do is make her mad. I can’t voice my opinion I can’t stand up for myself. I have told a very close person that all this is going on and they are trying to help but don’t know how. I can’t stand being threatened and slapped around. I shouldn’t go through that. She says that I talk back to much. I can just ask a question and she’s in my face screaming and spitting on me. I need out but what can I do?? My friends mom wants to take me in as her own. I can’t get emancipated because she won’t let me get a job. She won’t sign off on the papers. I take care of my 3 brothers and sister. I raised them. I stay up till 3 waiting for her to get home after hanging out with a friend ( she doesn’t do it frequently ). I need help before it becomes to much. I feel like this is the reason why my cousin committed suicide in Jan 13, 2017. Too much pressure to much abuse to much stress

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks so much for contacting us, it takes a lot of courage to reach out and share your story. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension between your parents and yourself. You should never have been told such hurtful things by the person living in your home. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.

    It sounds like your parents aren’t listening to you when you are trying to express your thoughts and feelings about your current situation. It could be a good idea to work with a local family counselor or have a conversation mediated by a school counselor/social worker, trusted friend, or family member to help clear the air. If you'd like, you can also call us directly and we can conduct a conference call with your mom or dad so you have a safe environment where you can express yourself.

    You brought up that you have been having anxiety and depression and have some issues regarding feelings of abandonment. It can be really hard to face these kinds of issues alone. If you’d like some additional support, an organization that may be helpful is the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). You can contact them by calling 1-800-950-NAMI or you can text them by sending NAMI to 741741. Another agency that could be of great help is the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), they can help you locate low or no cost mental health care providers in your area. Their number is 1-877-726-4727 or you can go to their site at samhsa.gov.

    If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi I'm a 16 yr old living in an emotionally abusive house, and it's so frustrating, it's been like this for as long as I can remember and it hurts so much at this point. My parents fight and say stuff in front of us, and whenever I try to help or anything I just get told it's none of my business. My mom moved a stranger into the house before after her and my dad broke up and he was super abusive to me. He had told me to kill myself, cut myself, that I should've been aborted, that I was the spawn of the devil, and much more. I'm not a bad kid I don't understand why I have to live in this hell. My mom didn't really do anything about it until he told me to kill myself. Then he got kicked out, she eventually ended up getting back with my dad and (present) they've recently broken up again and me, my brother, and my mom got kicked out of our appartment, and my dad has no where to go but we're living with my grandpa. I have abandonment issues from when my dad "left" when I was younger (he was kept away from me by my mom) and abandonment issues from my mother too. They both say things that tear me apart. Today I told my mom that if they're going to treat me this way why don't they just get rid of me, and she said she's trying to find a solution, insinuating that she was thinking about it, and my dad when he gets mad and they fight, my mom will say he's a bad father and he said that he wouldn't be our father for long and that I could find him when I'm 18. I love my dad but that hurt terribly, he explained after that he didn't mean it that way but I feel like I'm dying inside. I've have very bad anxiety and depressiom issues and I was thinking what would be best at this point is to get emancipated or move in with a friend, but my mother won't let me, I'm not sure what to do, I've tried ways to stop the pain but they never work I just feel trapped, I'm not going to kms or anythi g I just... I'm tired of this pain I feel like I wanna scream and cry because the pain in my heart and I don't know what to do

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod8
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there -

    Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can.

    Now we aren't legal experts here but like we tell a lot of our callers, the laws on that specific subject of running away vary from state to state. If the youth is filed as a file a runaway report, the parents can choose to press charges on those for harboring a runaway (ie. friend, neighbor, etc). Harboring a runaway is when that party are not giving accurate information on a runaways whereabouts. That could lead to a number of different legal issues such as misdemeanor charges (fines or jail charges). From what we know it isn’t something that typically happens, but it is in place to detour individuals from helping runaway minors from not returning home or lying on a runaways behalf. So it really just depends on how the youth's parents are going to react.

    Hope this information helps!
    Last edited by ccsmod8; 06-14-2019, 02:35 PM.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    can you be arrested in Georgia fir permitting a 16 and a half runaway spend some time in your home?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply: Hi I'm 16 years old


    Hi,
    Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline and sharing your situation with us. It is a courageous step to take that is not always easy. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation. Becoming pregnant and feeling unprepared or unsure of what to do next can be a scary thing to face. We are always here to listen and help as best as possible. Taking this step by step can help to make this stressful time a little less overwhelming. We understand that this situation has you in fear of the way you feel that your mother will react. Identifying people in your life that you can trust to support you during this time may be a good start to seeking help and exploring your options. It sounds like you have some folks that are willing to support you during this time. Good for you.

    Proper health care can be important in whatever you choose to do. If you would like to explore prenatal services One way to reach a doctor and find useful resources that specialize in women’s health/pregnancy is to contact Planned Parenthood at 1800-230-7526 or go to their website at https://www.plannedparenthood.org/.


    If you’d like additional support or resources please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY 24 hours, 7 days a week or chat with us online by going to www.1800RUNAWAY.org.
    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.

    Take care,
    NRS


    We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

    Leave a comment:

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