I have a situation with a granddaughter. it s long story so i will try to shorten it. i raised her for the first 7 yrs of her life, mom into drugs and dad denied her.. She was the daughter of my hu8sband at the times son, when grandpa n I divorced he gave her back to her mom n i did nit know at that time i didnt have to give up my guardianship, anyway mom lost her again to the state due to drugs so dad had to step in and get her. for 8 yrs he cut her off from my family that was around her the first 7 yrs. well her mom got clean and got visitations back so i was allowed to come back into her life. its been great-well her dad and family moved o ****** and she choose to stay with mom, well the communication is not there and i worry about her. she is so full of anger with her parents and they didnt bond like her and i did. She want to go to counseling so i am getting her in as soon as i can. Can she come and stay with me till they can figure things out with the help of counseling. It really scares me. Can i file for custody of her due to the circumstances. She will be 18 in september, I hope you can help us. thnk you
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Running away at 17 in oregon
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Hi there, thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like it’s been a tough situation with your granddaughter and it’s been pretty long term. As long as there is permission from a legal guardian for her to stay with you, then there should not be a problem for her to be there. We are not legal experts but if you are interested in some more so legal advice, we can provide a legal aid for you that may be more familiar with the laws in your particular state. To obtain a legal aid resource please call us or chat with us so we can search it up for you. We can also help find some mental health/counseling resources for you if you haven’t found somewhere for her yet.
In terms of custody, it sounds like you would have a good chance at being able to be a guardian for her. You seem to have been a stable person in her life despite moving around.
The legal aid can further help with guardianship questions as well.
We look forward to hearing from you!
Stay strong,
NRS
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I live in Oregon in the Multnomah county area. I need to leave home because I can't handle the emotional abuse I've been going thru since a child. I am 5 months away from turning 18 and I have somewhere to go. My mom is overly controlling and overly protective , to the point it's manipulation and guilt tripping to speak to her . I need to move out now but I don't want to get the person helping me out in trouble, by letting me stay with them. What can I do?
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Hi, thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline and sharing your story. We are very sorry to hear that you live in such a toxic home.
You do not deserve to be emotionally abused. It is great to hear that you have somewhere safe to go. When considering leaving home it can be helpful to not only plan where you are going to go, but also how you are going to get there, what you are going to bring with you, and how you are going to support yourself once you are in your new home. We are not legal experts, but if you ran away your mom could file a runaway report. This means you would be considered a runaway which is only a status offense, so it would disappear off your record when you turn 18. It also means if the police found you, you would be returned home and the person you were staying with could get in trouble for harboring a runaway, although there does not seem to be a law against this in Oregon. Additionally, it is usually only considered harboring a runaway if your mom pushes for it and the person you are staying with tries to stop the police. Furthermore, police do not usually look for runaway youth, especially those so close to 18 like you are. If you want to know how your local law enforcement would possibly react to you running away you could always give them a call at their non-emergency line and propose your situation as a hypothetical.
Thanks again for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. Feel free to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat with us at our website anytime. We are available 24/7 and are completely confidential.
Best of luck!
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I have the kind of same situation. I’m planning on going to cousin house and she will help me get my job and financially. I’ll be 18 in November. Can she get in trouble for keeping me even if my mother knows I’m over at her house and my grandma knows. It’s just my mother doesn’t know the exact location of my cousin house.
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Hi, Thanks for reaching out.
The answer to your question depends on what your mother might do. If she files a runaway report with police, they may be able to locate your cousin and you mom may decide to press charges.
We can talk about this further if you reach out to us either via our phone hotline at 1-800-786-2929 (1-800-RUNAWAY) or through our live chat service at www.1800runaway.org
We hope to hear from you soon so that we can talk this through.
Sincerely,
NRS
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So there is a 17 year old who was pleased in state care and then adopted out to his placement and it is a placement that looks fit living wise but there is mental abuse and drug disorder behind closed doors and the 17year old runs away to what he believes to be a safe place where other children reside and he is welcome What can someone do to prevent anyone from trouble without telling on his original placement he just wants to stay where he ran to
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds the youth is quite overwhelmed by things at the location that they were placed . You mention mental and drug abuse being the cause of the youth not feeling safe and wanting to leave. We’re sorry they're going through this. They don't deserve to be hurt and their safety is a priority. If they are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage them to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. They may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to their situation. If they ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
Often, having a safe space to share how they're feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. They're not alone in this. We want them to know that we are here as support to help them through this challenging time.
If they would like to talk more in detail, they can chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if they're unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. They know their situation best.
Here are some things for them to consider as well:
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.Last edited by ccsmod14; 09-18-2023, 04:13 AM.
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