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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Is it illegal for me to run away from a treatment program after being released from the hospital with no court order?
    I'm 20 years old

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  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply: My mom is verbally abusive


    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
    It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this.
    You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
    ou may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

    If you are feeling depressed or having suicidal thoughts contact the National Suicide prevention Lifeline-1-800-273-8255
    Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

    If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Be safe,
    NRS


    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My mom is verbally abusive and sometimes hits me, she won’t let me see any of my family, I’m not allowed to hang out with friends or have social media and I’m expected to do all the cooking and cleaning in the apartment for both of us, I’m 16 and she won’t allow me to get a job or a driver’s license and I receive SSI Disability checks bc of my vision problems (I’m not blind and I can see just fine) but she has always taken the money and she won’t let me get a job bc it will lower the amount we receive from that which is unfair since it’s supposed to be mine, I’ve been wanting to run away for years bc I’ve been forced to take care of myself since I was 7 but I have nowhere to go and if I even tried to get emancipated she would probably beat me so idk what to do anymore, my depression has been getting worse the past few years and she won’t get me any help and at this point I’m either running away or choosing suicide.
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 03-14-2019, 03:58 AM.

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  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello! Thank you so much for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline and sharing a bit about your situation. We are here for you and are grateful for the chance to to be of assistance to you.

    Through everything you are facing, it is a sign of great wisdom on your part that you are planning to talk to many people and seek advice before doing anything. Life can at times have a way of throwing challenges at us that may not be possible to handle on our own, and it takes strength to find help. Furthermore, your awareness of your personal health and emotions, such as being depressed and scared to fight back is a very important and helpful asset that can serve you well.

    It is great that you have found the LGBT community. On the other side, it can certainly be hurtful to feel that your family wouldn't accept something you're a part of. Nobody should have to hide who they are in order to feel safe, or to be yelled at for things they didn't do.

    As mentioned previously, it is a sign of great wisdom that you are planning to talk to many people and seek advice. Something you might consider doing is to brainstorm and list everyone you can think of who you trust and might feel comfortable sharing your situation with. As you might have already pictured, these people could come from many different areas of your life, such as school, peers, health professional, counselor, a trusted parent(s) of a friend, LGBT community, or any other trusted adult.

    In addition, since you have mentioned wanting to stay for your mom, it may be helpful to ask yourself if you might be willing to ask her for a serious conversation in which you let her know just how much you are struggling. It may very well be that you end up deciding you don't feel comfortable telling her *everything* you are dealing with, but it may be helpful to have spoken with the one person at home who you do want to be around. Since she is not home often, something you might consider asking her for could be some regular, dedicated time to spend with her alone. Perhaps weekly, or at whatever pace may be accommodable.

    If you do end up deciding to leave, here are some thoughts you may want to consider while planning for your safety and health. Stability can be crucial to mental health, and it can be helpful to consider how much change you may be facing if you leave, especially if your first choice for where to stay doesn't end up working out or changes conditions. In addition, some other considerations to think about include provisions for your health needs, what happens if you become sick, and how to react to any strangers who make you feel unsafe.

    Again, thank you so much for reaching out to us. You are very welcome to call us anytime to speak about your situation more in depth, or if you just need someone to talk to. Our lines are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We are here for you, and we wish you all the best!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi. I'm kind of struggling at home. I've been very depressed, and my family is not helping. I'm a part of the lgbt community, and they don't accept that community. I'm afraid that if they find out, they'll kick me out, or abuse me. I also have to hide a lot of things from them because they don't even try to help me when I do talk to them about things. I feel like my step dad doesn't care about me really, and definitely chooses my brothers over me. I get yelled at a lot for things I don't even do, and i'm too scared to fight back. I'm 15, going to be 16 in a few months, and I really want to leave. I plan on talking and getting advice about it from a lot of people before doing anything, but I don't know how much more I can take. The only person that makes me really want to stay is my mom, but she's really never home anyways. I know that if I leave it will hurt them, but would it be better for me if I did, mentally? I hope you can help at least a little bit, because I really don't know what to do

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  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    You mentioned wanting to know how you can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with your mom’s permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your mom. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

    Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

    Be safe,

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Me and my mom's relationship is not good. We fight a lot and I have really bad PTSD from her, because she calls me these names that stays in my head. I want to leave but don't want to get in trouble with the law. I've been through a CHIPs case twice and I don't want to go through it again. I feel so empty and alone with my mom. I already know she's emotionally abusing me and every time I stand up for myself it gets worse. I really need some advice. I have a job and I keep a good job at saving and using my money wisely. I have places to go but I don't want them to get into trouble for harboring me.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    replied
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about what has been going on and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. Your life is valuable and there are people that want to listen and help. If you are ever feeling suicidal and need someone to talk to, don't hesitate to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

    We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that if you are a minor, under 18, and you leave and your parents file a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your parents so you could safely share your feelings, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

    Best,

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    So my family is extremely toxic and they're just not good people.. I've been in many hospitals for suicide attempts and they've tried to get cps involved but they didn't do anything . I've been wanting to try and kill myself again but I thought I'd I try and runaway it's something new. I don't have any friends or family so I can't stay with anyone I need help Suggestions?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us. It takes a brave person to ask for help, and we appreciate you sharing your story with us. It sounds very frustrating to live in a home where you feel uncomfortable and don't want to live. We want to do everything we can to help you during this difficult time.

    It sounds like you have a history of leaving home, and the cops have returned you home before. We are not legal experts, but in general, we can give you some information on running away. It is not against the law for a minor (a person 17 or under in Minnesota) to run away from home. It is considered a status offense. When minors do run away from home, their parents can alert the police by filing a runaway report. This alerts the police that you have run away, and if they find you, they will return you home. There could also be legal consequences for any adults you are staying with for harboring a runaway.

    However, you can live with a relative or friend's parents if your parents give you permission. Have you thought about asking your parents if this is something they would be okay with? If this sounds like a difficult conversation to have with your parents, we at the National Runaway Safeline offer a conference calling service in which we facilitate conversations between youths who have left home and their parents. If you are interested in this, please give us a call any time at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

    It sounds very hard to be moving from place to place. You mentioned that your mom has said she does not want you home anymore. Legally, parents cannot just kick you out without arranging a safe place for you to live. If this happens, they can be reported for neglect. Child Help is an organization that can answer any questions you may have regarding neglect reporting and they can help you report the neglect if this were to happen. The phone number for Child Help is 1-800-422-4453.

    You also asked about emancipation. In Minnesota, it is recommended that a minor contact a lawyer if they want assistance with this process. It also requires that a minor can show a reason for being emancipated and that they are able to provide for themselves financially. We can tell you in general that this can be a lengthy and expensive process. If you would like to try to get in contact with a lawyer, we would be happy to provide you with some legal resources.

    We can also look into shelter resources for you if you ever need to stay in a shelter. We wish you the best of luck with everything and encourage you to call us if you ever want to talk about anything that is going on. We are here to listen and here to help. Again, we can be reached 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

    Sincerely,
    The National Runaway Safeline

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Re : runaway in state on Minnesota

    i recently left home the beginning of June because my mother has been taking in people in our house and my brothers are doing inappropriate things on the web and I just don’t feel comfortable living there anymore. On July 3rd the cops found me and I continued to tell them I didn’t want to go home. I’m 17 turning 18 in October. So two months and two weeks I’ll be an adult. But the police told me I didn’t belong in a shelter and brought me home anyhow. After a week at home I still couldn’t stand it and I left again. I’ve been couch hopping from friends house to friends house because their parents are scared my mom will press charges. I haven’t had a real home in awhile. My mother has contacted me and said she didn’t want me home anymore and that I will be put into shelter if police catch me. I’m scared because I have a job in town and I don’t want to be in a shelter where I know no one. My friends mom has the room and finances to let me stay with her but she doesn’t know what to do about the law and if she would get intoruble by the police. Should I contact police and just be upfront? Should I just go to shelter? In Minnesota I can’t get an emancipation is what the police told me? Is that true?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    replied
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about all that has been going on and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that because you are a minor, if you leave home and your aunt and uncle file a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your aunt and uncle to safely discuss your feelings, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

    Best,

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    couple of years ago my aunt and uncle got full custody of me. However, we don't get along and we can't trust each other with anything. I happen to get the blame for whenever she's mad or she'll call my parents worthless and tell me to quit playing the victim all the time. I am the age of 14 almost fifteen by this winter and I have been thinking about running away alot but just don't want to get in trouble if i get caught. The only thing is she wouldn't know where i was because she doesn't know all the people i do. Am i able to leave?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks again for reaching out. Thank you for continuing to advocate for your friend. It sounds like they are in a situation where they feel like no one will listen to them.
    We are not sure if you contacted the National Child Abuse Hotline that was suggested before, but filling an official child abuse report would be an important step for your friend advocating for herself. If she’s being abused, often times it is her word against her abuser’s (in this case, her mom). But if she files an abuse report and still has scars or other marks, she can point to that abuse report and scars as evidence for her viewpoint. The abuse report is best filed by your friend herself, by calling the Child Help number (1-800-422-4453) or by calling us. You can also file one on her behalf by getting as much detail as possible and then calling either number. You might consider doing this especially if your friend is unable to call.

    There are other options to consider. This doesn’t work for everyone, but sometimes when other options aren’t available, young people can use avoidance strategies to avoid conflict with an abusive parent or guardian. For instance, staying with friends or relatives with parents’ permission or avoiding the abusive person during times where conflict is more likely. If your friend is unsafe, this may not be a good long-term strategy but it could be crucial for their safety until a more permanent solution is found.

    Your friend is likely experiencing mental health effects from the trauma of abuse. She may want to contact SAMHSA for mental health support at 1-877-726-4727. This is another short-term strategy to be safe and healthy until a long-term solution is found. Your friend should be aware that mental health professionals are mandatory reporters, which means they will be forced to report abuse if your friend tells them about it.

    And of course, if your friend is considering running away, please contact us and we can help assist with safety planning. Again, thanks for reaching out on behalf of your friend and please feel free to contact us anytime, day or night.

    -NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hey, same person from the other post here

    A little update, CPS came over (an hour late), and started asking all of these questions. When she told CPS about everything that happened, they showed no sympathy and said "Yeah, thats understandable." They showed no sign of help, and still on the Mom's side, which even me, a very young person, knows. Please, I need help, and I have no idea to do. Not even the police will help.

    Leave a comment:

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