Family Issues

[Unregistered]

Hi, my name is Joseph and I am fifteen years old. I am contacting you wondering if there is anything I can do about my dad. My dad is emotionally abusive to me and the rest of my family causing my mom to try to commit suicide three times and each time failing. This happened when I was around seven years old. Ever since then my mom has had a severe case of mental fog and her IQ has dropped probably around a hundred points. She used to be a very intellectual person with a masters degree in psychology but now she just isn't as bright. I live in Irvine, California. I have tried to contact authorities about my dad and the first time it helped because my mom and I moved out but my brother stayed. Recently, my grandparents have made us move out of their house and back to our old house because they are devout Jehovah's Witnesses and believe that all families should remain united. Now on to what my dad does: He yells constantly for stupid things such as yelling at my brother who is fourteen for hours and making him cry for "losing a map" when my dad really had the map the whole time, I stayed an hour late at the gym one time and I came home got my head shaved and was told I was going to be sent to military school (may I add that I have never done an illegal substance in my life or had a drink besides my first communion also I don't even like taking medication of any kind) he has also strewn things around the hose for no reason at all so that way when I would walk around I would get cuts all over my feet, one last thing is that he gives me and my brother cruel and unusual punishments. The second time I contacted authorities they came and listened to my story and his and one of the officer's( a lady with the last name aguirre((i believe))) told me that he has a legal right to do anything he wants to do to me including hit me which I know is not true. I do not plan on running away but if I need to I will and I know VERY well how to survive in the wilderness on my own and cover up my tracks ( I have survival gear) So my "last resort" is to come on here and see if there is anything I can do. Also I am very strong and consistently lift weights and one day I am afraid I will snap and completely maul him (as to I have anger issues which i can consistently control but sometimes they show) Thank you for taking your time to read this carefully and please let me know if there is anything I can do.

Joseph

[ccsmod8]

RE: Family Issues

Hello Joseph,

Thank you for writing into the National Runaway Safeline bulletin board. After reading about your situation it sounds like living at home with your abusive father has been very difficult for you. And it can be a little frustrating when you don’t have a lot of places to reach out to. Or in your case when you reach out to places and they tell you that there is nothing that you can do about it. To better help you; let’s break down this a little more.

You stated in your message that you felt that you are being constantly mistreated and abused and home by your father for no apparent reason. You, your brother, and your mother certainly don’t have to be treated that way. Especially when you’re at home; a place that is supposed to be a safe and loving place for you. You always have the right to report any abuse to your local police department or child protective service in your state. If you don’t feel like they will take you seriously or you might not know of how to do that, you can always call us anytime you want. There is always someone here to help you.

So since there is so much going on right now with you at home and your situation doesn’t sound particularly safe, we suggest that you give us a call on our 24hour hotline (1.800.RUNAWAY) for a more immediate response, as well as connect to some resources that we might have on hand to help perhaps ease the situation your currently in. Another service that we offer here at the NRS is our chat room which is offered from 4:30pm to 11:30pm/CST (www.1800RUNAWAY.org).

Look forward to talking with you and best of luck.

[Unregistered]

I would like to move out

Okay so I'm fifteen years old and I would like to move out of my mom's house, but I I don't want to move into my dad's. They both are emotionally abusive to me and my family and it had gotten so bad at one point that I wanted to kill myself because of it (I got help for that though). We argue all the time and I would like t leave. I want to get a job so that maybe one of my friends would let me sleep on their couch or something and I could help pay for food and other things that I need, but my mother won't let me.

[ccsmod3]

Re: I would like to move out

Hello and thanks for reaching out on our forum. It sounds like you’re dealing with a difficult situation at home with your mom and don’t feel like it would be any better going to your dad’s. You mentioned that things had gotten so bad at one point you wanted to kill yourself because of it, but you got help. (Good for you for getting help.) At the same time, it sounds like you and your mom are still arguing all the time and you’d like to leave. We’re also very sorry both of your parents are emotionally abusive. You don’t deserve to be abused in any way emotional or otherwise.

We’re not here to make the decision to leave or not for you, but we are available to further talk to you about your situation and hopefully come up with some options together. It sounds like you’ve thought up a plan as far as getting a job and sleeping on your friend’s couch, but your mom won’t let you. To continue talking, please feel free to try out our Live Chat. Best of luck!