Running away to a friends house

[Guest]

How do I get emancipated

[ccsmod7]

Hi there, thanks for reaching out today.

We are not legal experts, but we can help you get a general sense of how emancipation works. Our general understanding is some states offer formal emancipation statutes while others do not unfortunately. Laws vary depending on your location, but in many states a minor can petition the court for emancipation to take responsibility for their own care before they turn 18. In most states that have emancipation, you must be 16 or 17 years old to petition for emancipation. In most cases, you would have to prove in court that you have an income and can care for yourself financially, and that you are able to live separately from your parents. The court will also factor in the mental and physical welfare of your parents in order to establish your best interest, and your schooling. In some states, your legal guardian would have to agree to this in court. Usually, the best way to learn about emancipation in your state is to contact a lawyer. You may also find information at your county family court. You typically would petition your local court, and in some states your parent would have to petition the court.

We can look up legal aid resources that may be able to help you with the process. Please do not hesitate to call or chat if you have questions, need legal resources, or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think.

[Guest]

I'm 12 and I live in Vancouver WA. I want to run away for a day or 2 to my friend's house. I'm not having very much trouble at home, except I pretend I'm happy when I'm not and my sibling is obnoxious.

I just want a break. I need to feel wanted and loved, but I don't feel like I can ask for that at home.
Will my friend and his parents get in trouble? Is there anyway I can avoid trouble?

Sincerely, Unhappy Kid

[ccsmod1]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're here 24/7 to listen and to support.

We're sorry to hear about how you have been feeling and want you to know that you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that because you are a minor, if you leave home and your parents file a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for your friend or whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your parents or thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are here to listen and help you in either talking to your parents or helping you find other people that you can reach out to during this difficult time.

Best,

NRS

[Guest]

I'm 13 and I really hate my family. My mom is never around and my dad is abusive. My parents are split and I previously went to school with friends that I really enjoyed, and helped me deal with my self harm and depression, but now my dad is making me move schools because he found out I have a boyfriend. He also broke my phone so I only have a computer. I really want to get to a friend's house and stay there for a while, but I don't want to get my friend (this friend is not my boyfriend by the way, i think it would be unsafe to stay with him) in trouble. I also want to go to school with my friend but I know my parents will find me. I don't like anyone in my family (including aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc) at all. They all make me feel uncomfortable and unwanted. I've also had very grades all my life and I really want to graduate + go to college. So how can I run away to a friend's safely until I can work out something better without (major) legal issues?

[ccsmod6]

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
You mention self-harm and depression. We are sorry that you have been experiencing this. If you feel you would like to talk to someone else about this you can reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1800-273-8255. You can also reach out the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration at 1877-726-4727 or at www.samhsa.gov .While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. You mention experiencing abuse by your dad. No one deserves to go through that. If you would like to report the abuse you can go to Childhelp.org. They are a National Child Abuse Hotline. You can also reach them at 1800-422-4453. Your other options for reporting are contacting CPS to make a report. We can do this with you over a conference call if you would like. All you would need to do is to call in to or hotline at 1800-Runaway. If you do end up leaving home and do not want to stay with your friend anymore we can try to help you find youth shelters in your area.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

[Guest]

I am 12 years old and I live in British Columbia Canada and I want to run away things at home are horrible they help at me and they smack me so I want to go to my best friends house is there anything that is illegal cause I don’t want there family to get in trouble any advice

[ccsmod11]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out. We definitely want to let you know that you don't deserve to be smacked, that is not okay and it's not your fault. Unfortunately, you're in Canada, and we only know about information and resources pertaining to the United States. You may try to call Kids Help Phone in Canada for more help: 1-800-668-6868.

Best,
NRS

[Guest]

I'm 13 and I want to run away from home. I hate my entire family, especially my parents. They never support me in anything. I plan to runaway very soon, and I've done research to make sure i'll be as safe as possible. I hope you can help me answer these questions

1. If I stay at a friend's house for 1-2 days, then call the police and ask to be taken to a shelter, would my friend's family get in trouble?

2. My friend's house (if I run from my mom's house , which is the only option i have) is 7 hours away (by foot). But it only takes an hour or two by bus. Would it be safer to take a bus? (I do have money)

3. If i tell the police or the people at the shelter that I (feel) like my parents are abusing me, will my parents go to jail? Also, will I be put in a foster home? Can I live with a friend or a family member?

4. Is it abuse if it doesn't happen everyday? I just want to make sure I'm not overreacting (my friends tell me i'm not, but we're just kids, and i want to make sure)

[ccsmod2]

Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. We understand that it takes courage to seek help. We are sorry to hear that you are being abused at home. Abuse is never okay and you don't deserve to be treated that way. Abuse doesn't have to happen everyday for it to be considered abuse. You have the right to report the abuse to CPS. They would conduct an investigation and if they determine that your home isn't safe, they would remove you from your home. We are not legal experts so we can't say for sure if your family would go to jail. It sounds like you are thinking about running away. Having a plan about where you would go and how you would take care of yourself is important. If you decide to runaway, your friend's family could get charged with harboring a runaway. Most shelters require parental consent to stay there. We cannot say for sure whether it would be safe to take the bus or walk to your friends house. However 7 hours is a long time to be walking and you may want to think about how you would keep yourself safe at night. We hope this information helps, please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.

[Guest]

I woke up this morning and got a call from my friend. She said she’s running away and needs me to pick her up. She said she can’t take it anymore. Please help me. I don’t know what to do and I’m so scared for what she’ll do if I don’t help her leave.

[ccsmod7]

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that your friend is faced with right now and you’re wanting to find a way to help them as they mentioned wanting you to pick her up. It’s great that your friend has support and concern from you especially since this time is quite difficult for her. Here at NRS, we are primarily concerned for your friend's safety right now. If you feel like she is in immediate danger either from someone else or herself you can call 911. If you are worried that she might harm herself and you call 911, she generally would be taken to the hospital and held to receive mental health services.

If she is under 18 years old and you house her while she is listed as a runaway and she is then found by police, you could be at risk of being charged with harboring a runaway by her parents. If she is 18 or over it is generally legal for you to go pick her up. If you do pick her up from an unsafe environment, we encourage you to always be thinking and strategizing around your safety and to reach out to police if you need.

Having a space to vent and explore options may often bring out a solution previously not thought of. We are here as support to help you and your friend through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. You might also let her know that she can always call us, we are 24/7, confidential, and here to help her.

We’re here to listen and to help and hope you or your friend can reach out soon.

Take care,

NRS

[Guest]

I’m 15 years old and I want to run away to a friends.

My my father is abusive. My mom forces me to go and won’t let me talk to anyone. My step dad has taken over my house hold. No one will help me and I can’t do this anymore. I need to get away from all of them and I can’t keep cutting. Please.

[ccsmod5]

Thank you so much for reaching out. It sounds like you’re in a very scary situation. No one ever deserves to be abused and it’s awful that your mom won’t allow you to talk to anyone. It’s understandable that you would feel the need to get away from the situation. You deserve to feel safe, loved, and supported!
You mention that you “can’t keep cutting.” A resource that you might find helpful is To Write Love on Her Arms, which is a blog that shares stories and provides help for people struggling with self-injury. Another resource that you might consider is the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI); this is a great organization that can connect you with support, understanding, and coping tools. Their number is 1-800-950-NAMI or you can text “NAMI” to 741741.
You also write that your father is abusive. No one deserves to be abused and you have the right to file an abuse report with child protective services. If you need help filing a report or would like more information about what abuse reporting is and how it can help, you can call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. You might also consider confiding in a teacher, guidance counselor, or other adult you trust.
It sounds like you’re hoping to run away to a friend’s place. It’s really great that you have a friend who is supportive and willing to help you out! It could be helpful to know some general information about running away. Though we’re not legal experts, we can generally say that you would need parental consent to leave home. If you do leave, your parents would have the right to file a runaway report and if the police are able to find you they may return you home. If the police do find you, that may be a good time to alert them to the abuse going on at home.
Thank you for reaching out. If you need additional resources or want to talk about how you’ve been feeling, please feel free to reach out any time. Our number is 1-800-786-2929. Stay safe and stay strong!

[Guest]

Hi, I live in Missouri and I’m 15. I was thinking about running away because of how my mother isn’t acting like a parent, she is ingleting me and I’m tired of it. I just want to leave the house for a little while.

[ccsmod15]

Thank you so much for reaching out. Sorry to hear about how things are at home with your mother not acting as a parent. No one ever deserves to be neglected or harmed in any way. It’s understandable that you would be tired of it and want to get away from the situation. You deserve to feel safe, loved, and supported!

Please know that you have the right to report neglect with child protective services. If you would like help filing a report or would like more information about what abuse reporting is and how it can help, you can call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. Another option would be confiding in a teacher, guidance counselor, or other adult you trust.

Though we’re not legal experts, we can generally say that at 15 you would need parental consent to leave home. If you do leave, your mother would have the right to file a runaway report and if the police are able to find you they may return you home.

Thank you for reaching out. If you need additional resources or want to talk about how you’ve been feeling, please feel free to reach out any time. Our number is 1-800-786-2929. Stay safe and stay strong!

[Guest]

Hi, my friend is getting neglected and beat by her mother. She says she wants to run away, and since I’m her closest friend I offered for her to stay here. I know what may happen, so that’s why I won’t tell my mom that she will be here with me. I know child protective services should get involved, and they have. It’s like her parents knew that they were there too. So her mother acted how a mother should take care of her child. I don’t know what to do anymore. Forgot to menchion we are both 15

[ccsmod15]

Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are a good and trusted friend and have some awareness of what needs to be done about your friend’s abuse and the legal risks of having her stay with you. We want to confirm some questions you have and provide some helpful resources for next steps.

Let’s start by confirming a couple of facts:
*At the age of 15, your friend does not have the legal right to live away from her mom without her mom’s permission. If her mom files a runaway report and the police find her at your house, she will most likely be brought back home.
*It’s a status offense for a youth to runaway (it’s not illegal), but it is illegal for an adult to knowingly harbor a runaway youth and it’s possible your mom can be prosecuted for this if the police found your friend staying with you.

Now let’s talk about some resources:
*Reporting this abuse to Protective Services is a big step that can result in your friend being removed from home. We’re sorry to hear that Protective Services didn’t seem to detect this abuse and neglect. If you’d like, you can also report this abuse and neglect again on your friend’s behalf by contacting the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (thehotline.org)
*Another resource to try? Justice for Children (https://justiceforchildren.org/). This organization is just for cases like this where reporting child abuse to Protective Services isn’t successful in protecting abuse to a child. Please take a look at this site to get some good tips from a legal expert on how you can best help your friend

We hope this response was helpful! Please don’t hesitate to call us at the National Runaway Safeline if you’d like to discuss any of this further. You can reach us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Best,

NRS

[Guest]

I recently came out to my parents about being pansexual and everything has turned awful for me. My parents started to delete my social media and get angry at me for no reason. They ground me and say things that hurt and bring up my sister like she is the perfect little daughter. They said they accepted me but I don't know if that's true. Im thinking about running away to a friends house, I live in Illinois, and I am 13

[ccsmod7]

Hi, that sounds like a really hard situation to be in, thank you for reaching out today. It’s totally understandable that you feel like you’re not being accepted, and that can be really hurtful. Fortunately, there are a lot of resources available for people who identify with the LGBTQIA+ community. The first is the LGBT National Hotline, and their number is 1-888-843-4564 website glbthotline.org, and the second is the LGBT National Youth Talkline at 1-800-246-7743. They can both help you find resources, and talk through some of the struggles you’re having with your family. Another option if you did want to try and reconcile with your parents would be to try a mediated conversation or even counseling if you and they are open to it. A mediated conversation is just where you have a neutral person sit in on your conversation and help keep it from escalating, and make sure everyone can be heard. This person could be a family member or school counselor, or we can provide that service through our hotline as well.

As far as running away, there’s a lot to consider. We’re not legal experts, but we can tell you what happens in general. If you were to run away to a friend’s house, then since you are a minor, running away would be considered a status offense. What that means is, if your parents were to file a runaway report and the police found you, they would bring you back home. In addition to that, if you stayed with someone who was an adult, they could possibly get charged with harboring a runaway. It’s entirely up to you, but if you do decide to run away, know that you can always call us and we can help you think through the logistics, like where you will stay, how you will stay safe, and how you will support yourself. We’re available 24/7 at 1-800-Runaway and we’re here to listen.

[Guest]

I’m 16, turning 17 in December -PA

Me and my family have never really connected. I never felt like I had a solid foundation for my home life. My parents are extremely religious and very homophobic. Not only am I gay, but I’m also still in the closet. Last year I got into an accident with ather school student, however I have dropped the situation and moved on. My mother however has been very frustrated because she can’t mak any further legal actions toward him. I’ve been very uncomfortable and just not happy for many years. My school counselor isn’t really helping much... My best friend (and his parents) said that if needed I could stay with them at their house as long as I needed to to get back together, but my parents would never allow that. If I were to take my own action and leave my house to go to my friend’s, what kind of legal action could happen to my friend’s parents or to myself?

[ccsmod10]

Hi there, thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. From what you shared, it sounds like you’re in a really difficult situation and we are here to help you as best we can.It is very brave to share what has been going on at home. It sounds like it is a tough situation and this is a great step to look for help. We are going to talk about a few things and if you want to talk further or brainstorm other ideas, we are here 24/7 over our phone lines (1-800-RUNAWAY) and we also have an online chat system as well.

First, it sounds like home is not a good place right now and we are sorry to hear that. We aren’t legal experts but generally, the age of adulthood is 18 years old which means if you are under that age, your parents/guardians are legally responsible for you and where you live. This means if you do decide to leave home, your parent/guardian can reach out to the non-emergency police to file a runaway report. This means they would call the non-emergency police and file that report, which is a status offense meaning you wouldn’t get arrested but it is just something you are not allowed to do since you are under the general age of majority. If you are found, you will be returned to home, but if you do not feel safe, you can tell the police department and they would involve Child Protective Services to investigate. If you do to your friend’s house, your parents may also try to press charges of harboring a runaway, just so you know the risk if you think she might do that. If you do not feel safe, you can tell the police department and they would involve Child Protective Services to investigate. We are always here to talk more about this and if you do decide you need to leave home, we can talk about safety planning.

You deserve to be accepted for who you are and we are sorry to hear your parents are not accepting of your identity. The LGBT National Youth Talkline (1-800-246-7743) is a great resource that provides telephone, online private one-to-one chat and email peer-support, as well as factual information and local resources for cities and towns across the US. They help talk about coming-out issues, relationship concerns, parent issues, and school problems in a safe place. We are also still here for you if you want to talk about these things as well.

We know this is a difficult situation and we really hope to hear from you again if you feel comfortable reaching out.
Best, NRS

[Guest]

Me and my friend are both 14 and we live in the USA but different states. Would she be able to run away and come stay with me because her parents are really abusive and she’s not safe in her home. I’m just not sure what I can really do about it but I have to do something about it. Would she be able to come here and switch schools? I’m not sure what to do to get her to live here but she said she wants to live here.

[ccsmod2]

Hey There,

Thank you for reaching out to NRS, we know that it sometimes can be difficult to reach out and we are glad you had the courage to reach out to us. It sounds like your friend is going through a very difficult time. Any type of abuse is unacceptable, your friend should not have to go through that. If your friend would like she can report the abuse to the child abuse hotline at -1800-422-4453. We know that sometimes reporting abuse can be difficult, if your friend would like she can chat or call us and we would be more than happy to help her report the abuse that is going on. As far as running away, running away is not a criminal offense. Her parents have the right to file a runaway report, which in most cases if she is found the police would bring her back home. You mentioned how you guys live in different states, something to think about is how she would get to your home safety. It can be dangerous traveling to different states alone as a minor. Also if you she came to stay with you her parents could press charges for harboring a runaway, which is also something else to consider. We hope this information helped you in your situation, if you have any more questions feel free to call us. We wish you the best of luck!
NRS

[Guest]

So im probably gonna run away i hate my parents more than I've hated anyone else. My mom threatened to beat me up yesterday and i didn't even do anything it was because of something my sister said. She is racist, stereotypical, and judgmental of everyone. She calls me and my sister lazy and brats all the time and always complains about wasting money on us and how we always ask for stuff but we don't. She says how she can't ever do anything cuz of us. My dad has had mood swings and sometimes he gets so mad i dont know if he is gonna hit me he used to when i was younger. My older sister is the favorite and never does anything. All she does is sleep and whine about being tired. My brother is mentally and physically disabled. We are forced to feed him and watch on him. My parents wake us up at 7am in the mornings to feed him in summer. He always hurts my head because he is always making loud noises and for some reason it doesn't bother my mom but she hates when we talk too loud or laugh. I could go on about so much other stuff and it's not like i could say anything my sister said she didn't wamt to take care of him and my mom lost her ******** and she hasn't talked to her or me for a day idk i got brought in it. Anyways my friends r ok with me stayin with them i just don't wanna come back because they will just be mad and yell some more also don't know if i should continue school since they will just tell my parents.

[ccsmod9]

Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We can understand that you are going through a difficult time and it has been very stressing to be in the environment you find yourself in. Our hope is to provide you with tips and resources in order to best guide you in a decision that will be most beneficial to you and your well-being.
From what we gather about your story it seems as though your environment around home is tense and your parents have really been hard on you and your siblings. No one should have to go through that much less have to hear that day to day. It is understandable that you would want to find a place to stay elsewhere. To be clear we are not legal experts but from what we can tell you if you are younger than 18 you are considered a minor in most states and therefore your parents would have the right to file a runaway report. What this would do is get the police involved and if they found you or knew where you were they would take you back to your parents. The outcome of staying with your friends would mean that your friend’s parents could face charges of harboring a minor. However you have mentioned many worrisome things. It seems as though things won’t be better any time soon. If you feel as though you are not safe at home please feel free to contact the police. Another resource available to you is school personal they would be able to help talk with and help you feel as though you are being heard. Plus they would be able to be around you and help you day to day. It is your right to feel safe and protected and if you no longer feel that way you can reach out for help. If you do happen to runaway you can definitely reach out to us and we can help find some shelters, transitional living programs, or food pantries, etc.
Again we want to thank you for seeking us out and asking for help. We know it takes a lot to reach out. If for any reason you have more questions or concerns please do not hesitate to call us at (1-800-786-2929) or reach out to us online through our chat option at (www.1800runaway.org). We hope that you can find resolution to your situation.
Best Wishes- NRS