Running away to a friends house

[Guest]

Hey I’m 17 and my dad has kicked me out of the house, and my mom refuses to let me live with her and they threaten to call the cops if I stay with a friend. Is there anyway I could get into legal trouble?

[ccsmod5]

Hi,
Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you’re in a difficult position and it’s not okay that your family has been treating you this way. We’re not legal experts, but since you are a minor your family is obligated to care for you. If you feel comfortable doing so, you can notify the police about what’s going on. Kicking you out is generally considered neglectful.
That being said, your parents could still file a runaway report with the police if they choose to. If the police are able to locate you, they will return you home. There are generally no legal consequences beyond that.
If you want to talk more specifically about the situation or need help locating resources, please feel free to reach out to us 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929. We wish you the best of luck and we hope you found this email helpful. We encourage you to give your honest feedback to us at the link listed below this email. Best of luck to you.

Sincerely,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi I wanted to ask a question my friend wants to run away when she turns 18 she is 17.She don’t want to live with her parents because they cant understand her.she had a problem she ruin her garage with the car she never wanted to do that it was an accident but her parents instead of asked her if she was fine they took her cellphone and her car and they don’t let her work.Also they beat her because of accidents she did not wanted to do.she wanted to run away years ago but now she is decide to run away at her cousin house.what should I do.

[ccsmod5]

Thanks for reaching out to NRS, we’re here to listen and to help. It sounds like you’re really concerned about your friend’s safety – it is great that she has such a caring friend as support. From what you’ve shared, your friend has been having a difficult time with her parents.
We’re very concerned that you indicated that they beat her – physical harm is never excusable, not with the accidents you’ve described or anything reason, really. It sounds like she’s been thinking about running away but is reaching her breaking point.
She always has the option to report what’s going on – if that is an option that she would like to pursue, there is a great resource called Child Help USA that can answer questions and, if she decides reporting is an option she wants to pursue, they can help walk her through the reporting process and provide support. Their number is 1-800-422-4453.
You also mentioned that she wants to run away when she’s 18 and is just 17 now. Do you know at what age in her state a person is considered legally an adult? The reason we ask is that in many states, you are no longer considered a minor at age 18; once legally an adult, your friend can decide where she wants to live, without needing her parents’ consent to go.
Legal age is not 18 in every state, however, so it’s important to check that out first. One resource which may be helpful in looking up legal age in her state is a website called www.sexetc.org - it has a map you can use to click on the state in question for legal age there.
In terms of what you or your friend should do, we can’t tell you what to do, but we can help brainstorm more options that are available to her – then it would be up to her to decide what option works best for her situation, as not all situations/solutions work the same.
One thing you can do is keep providing her support and let her know that she has someone she can talk to – be it you, or she could also call us at the NRS hotline if she wants to further explore options available to her.
We hope this information was helpful to you and your friend. Please don’t hesitate to contact us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We’re open 24 hours a day /7 days a week. Best of luck to you both!

[Guest]

Hi I am going to be staying at my friends house because my mom told me to go live with one of my friends and said that she was going to put me in a group home. Ive talked to her but her and the family are really mad at me and really don¨t care where i go. I will be safe and still go to school I just fell like i should go and let them be ok with out me.

[ccsmod3]

Hi there,
We are really glad you reached out to us and glad that you have a safe place to go. It sounds like there is a lot going on at home and it seems frustrating how your mom told you to go live with someone else. As long as you’re a wanting to go to a friends house and your mom giving you permission (written so she can’t file a runaway report on you later) there aren’t any legal consequences that can happen. If you are wanting to stay at home, then your mom is responsible for you until your are 18 years of age. If she does not provide for, this can be seen as neglect, and can be reported to the police.
We would encourage you to talk to people around and get some support through this . It seems like a difficult situation to navigate, but looks like you are still wanting to stay focused and do well at school. You have the right to express what you want and need , but seems like there has been an ongoing issue for awhile.
We do offer conference calling here, where we can mediate a conversation between you and your mother if there is a need for having a constructive conversation about how to move forward. Also, if you ever come to the point where you are staying with you friend and your mother is refusing to help you with enrolling in school, there is something call the McKinney-Vento Homeless Assistance Act, that helps runaway/homeless youth have access to education.
We can better support you if you call into us directly at our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY or access our chat through our website. Stay strong and know that you are not alone this. We will support you through this the best why we can.
-NRS

[Guest]

I've been getting into weed with the wrong people and not that my parents already hate me, but I got into even more trouble an now they can't trust me. For a week I've been getting my grades up, being respectful, stop smoking, and to them it just doesint seem like enough. I hate my life here and they don't care at all. They would probably be happier if I ran away anyway. So I need a place to go, I just don't know where though. And im only 14. Help?

[ccsmod5]

Hey,
Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you’ve been trying your best to change your behavior for your parents, and it can be frustrating that it doesn’t seem like enough. It can sometimes be difficult to connect with your parents and to have them recognize your efforts. One option you might consider is having a conversation with them about how you’ve been feeling, what you need from them, and what they expect of you. It can be helpful to have another adult around when you have that conversation, so it stays fair and productive and doesn’t turn into a screaming match. You might consider asking a therapist, guidance counselor, or any other adult you trust to help you have that conversation. Here at NRS, we also offer a conference call service and can help you have that conversation as well.
You mention that you want to run away. We’re not legal experts, but generally speaking you’d need your parents permission to leave home if you’re under 18. If you’re able to get your parents’ permission to stay with a friend or another family member, that might be a good option for you. Similarly, it could be an option to stay in a shelter if you’re able to get their permission. If you leave home without permission, your parents would have the right to file a runaway report and if the police find you, they most likely will return you home.
Thank you again for reaching out. It sounds like you’re in a pretty difficult situation and it takes a lot of courage to reach out for support. Please feel free to call us anytime if you ever need help locating resources, brainstorming options, or just need someone to listen. Our number is 1-800-786-2929. Our lines are open 24/7 and we hope to hear from you. Best of luck.

[Guest]

Idk where to go if I run away right now.But I might just ask a stranger to drop me off somewhere but i really need help on the righ thing to do? Because I got in some trouble and one of my parents are taliking about beating me!

[ccsmod10]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out!

It sounds like you are going through a lot right now, so we are glad you are reaching out to us because we are here to help! If you would like to talk with someone and receive immediate help or talk about your options, our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY is confidential and 24/7.

Has the parent that is talking about beating you ever beat you before? If yes, you may have the option to report that abuse to Child Protective Services. If you would like more information on reporting, Child Help, the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453 or childhelp.org can be an option.

You also mentioned that you might have a stranger drop you off somewhere, have you thought about where you would like to go? Are there friends or family you could stay with while you decide on somewhere to go? While we are not legal experts, we can let you know that if you were to leave without parental permission, there may be charges pressed against anyone you stay with if you are not a legal adult. This may be something to mention to anyone you may consider staying with so that they know the situation.

We could also look into shelters, transitional housing programs, or other resources that do not require parental consent if you would consider that as an option.

Another resource we have at NRS is a conference call. Basically we would talk to you about your situation, and then would talk to your parent. We would then join the calls together and remain on the line to keep conversation constructive.

As we said, we are here to help. The number we mentioned can be used to talk through any of the options we mentioned, or we can help talk through any of the other options or feelings you might have.

Best of luck

We hope this response was helpful!  We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum.  Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey:  https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

[Guest]

My boyfriend is 17 we live in Texas
his mom wants to send him to Texas challenge it’s a boot camp for 6 months he first decided yes, but then has decided no, he spoke to his mom and said he no longer wanted to go
and she says she doesn’t care he is going , he now is planning on running away, not with me.
Is this smart ?

[ccsmod3]

Hello!
Thank you for reaching out to us! At the National Runaway Safeline, our main focus is to make sure youth are in the safest environment for themselves. If your boyfriend does not feel comfortable at home, we would be more than happy to discuss his options with him. Let him know that our number is 1-800-786-2929, and if he is willing to tell us about his situation, we are here to listen and here to help 24/7! Please do not hesitate to reach out again if either of you have any more questions.
Best of luck!
NRS
We hope this response was helpful! We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey.

Tell us what you think about your experience!

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

[Guest]

Hi I’m 13 and my mom beats me, so I just want to runaway but I need somewhere to stay, once I figure out where I’m staying then I’m going to runway,bye

[ccsmod3]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline and sharing a little bit about what is going. It takes a lot of courage to reach out and especially in a time where you have a really tough and complex situation. We are sorry you are experiencing abuse from your mom, no one ever deserves to go through that. You do have the right to report the abuse to Child Help at 1-800-422-4453. You can either do it your self or call into us directly and we can support you through it. It I hard to say the result of reporting , but if you call in you can ask what the process might look like.
One of our main goals is to make sure you are safe, so you ever seriously decide to runaway and need shelter, resources, or a safe place to go you can find safe locations at nationalsafeplace.org org. It could be good to thinking about how you will survive with shelter, food, and money.
We aren’t legal experts, but we have general knowledge about running away. In most states, running away isn’t illegal, but what is called a status offense. You can’t get arrested for it but it will mostly likely go on your record until you are 18. The police will only know if you have runaway if your parents/guardians file a police report. We can’t say for sure how the police will respond , but we hear a lot that police will take potential places you might be and will actively search for you. If they come across you, the most likely will return you home to your parents. Sometimes we hear that if you are staying with someone who knows you are a runaway and are not actively trying to return you or finding shelter for you, your guardians can press charges against the people who are housing you, with something that is called harboring.

We are here for you and will support you in anyway that we can. Please feel free to call into us directly as we can talk further about your situation and find resources that are best for you in your are. Stay strong and you are not alone in this! Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY we are open 24/7 and we also have chat available.

We hope this response was helpful! We'd love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to support youth and families. Please click the link below to fill out our survey.

Tell us what you think about your experience!

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

[Guest]

i’m 16 turning 17 in july , i ran away because my dad told me he wanted me to start paying 500 for rent just because i got a job. i am staying at a friends house. If i keep in contact with my parents and remain in school can i stay out of the house ?

[ccsmod15]

Hi - we're glad you got in touch with us today. It sounds like it was quite a surprise that your dad asked you to start paying rent when you got a job. We're wondering if you've talked to your dad about what may be your family's financial situation that would cause him to ask you to pay rent. Is it possible you'd be more willing to consider this if you had more information? Since you are not 18, your parents can legally determine where you may live. Perhaps you would be able to negotiate with your parents about the amount of rent you should pay, or to get permission to live elsewhere. This is the kind of thing we could talk about with you further if you want to call 1-800-RUNAWAY. Remember that your call would be completely confidential. We could also join you on a conference call with your parents if you think that would be helpful. Our role would be to help make sure you are being heard and to help you advocate for yourself. Best wishes.

[Guest]

My friend is having a difficult home life. She does not want to approach her guardians about it because she knows they will make the situation worse than it currently is. She lives in Florida and is looking to come run and live with me in Arizona. She knows it will be a hard journey but she has no where else to go. She is currently 13 and I am 14. If she were to stay with me, could me and or my parents get in legal trouble? What if my parents do not let her stay, what can she do as a back up plan?

[ccsmod5]

Hey,
Thanks for reaching out. Your friend is lucky to have someone like you in her corner. It sounds like things are not going well at home and so your friend is thinking of running away to stay with you. While we are not legal experts, we can say that you generally need to be 18 to leave home without permission. If your friend leaves without permission, their parents would have the right to file a runaway report and if the police are able to find them, they will be returned home. In addition, there is the possibility that your parents could be charged with harboring a runaway. If your parents are not able to let your friend stay, she might consider staying with another friend or another family member. Another option is to stay at a runaway shelter. Keep in mind, though, that many runaway shelters need parental consent.
You mentioned that your friend has a “difficult” home life. We’re not sure if this applies, but if there is abuse going on at home, your friend has the right to file an abuse report. For more information about what constitutes abuse, what the options are, and what might happen if your friend does file an abuse report, you can call the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-2253.
Thank you again for reaching out. We hope this was helpful and we encourage you to reach out by phone if you need additional resources or need help figuring out options. Our number is 1-800-786-2929 and our lines are always open. If you have a moment, we'd appreciate your feedback of our crisis services at the following link:

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

Stay safe!

[Guest]

Hi,
I am 14 years old turning 15 in November. Ever since I was 5 my father and I have been fighting every day. He has told me that he wished I died and my deceased siblings were still alive. I have also filed an abuse report but DCF hasn't done anything to help. I am planning to tell my trusted teacher at school that I am planning to leave my house to live with my best friend. I'm not leaving because I want to "party" or none of that, I am leaving because I want a good future for my self and I have been going crazy lately. I really don't want to get my friend or his parents in trouble with the law. My mom has told me that she doesn't care if I leave, I just won't be coming back for anything. Would it be illegal to leave? I live in Cape Coral, Florida.

[ccsmod4]

Reply: Hi,
I am 14 years old turning 15 in November.

Hi there,

Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
We are sorry you are going through a difficult time.

While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Im 13 year's old and i hate my life at my house i want to run away to my best friends house and i was wondering if there was anything illegal with my best friends parents not wanting to give me back to my parent

[ccsmod2]

Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. We understand that it takes courage to seek help. We are sorry to hear that you aren't happy at home. It sounds like you want to runaway. Having a plan about where you would go and how you would take care of yourself is important. If you decide to leave home, your parents have the right to file a runaway report. With a runaway report, if the police find you they would return you home. Running away is not illegal but if you decide to stay with your best friend, their parents could get charged with harboring a runaway. If you have any other questions or just want to talk, please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.

We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: We care what you think

[Guest]

For a long time I have wanted to run away because my mom is selfish and doesn’t provide anything I need I want to move with my friend who does provide what I need but I’m scared to get my mom friend into trouble with the law because of my mom what should I do

[ccsmod5]

Hey,
Thanks for reaching out. We’re sorry to hear that your mom isn’t providing you with what you need. Though we’re not legal experts, this may qualify as neglect and you have the right to file an abuse report with child protective services. We encourage you to reach out to an adult that you trust, like a guidance counselor or a teacher. If you want more information about what constitutes neglect or what might happen if you do file an abuse report, you can call the National Child Abuse Hotline. This hotline is confidential, so you do not have to make an abuse report if you don’t want to. Their number is 1-800-422-4453.
It sounds like you do have a place to stay, which is awesome, however you might want to get your mom’s permission. If you leave without her permission she does have the right to file a runaway report and if the police are able to locate you, they may return you home. It is possible that your friend’s mom may be charged with harboring a runaway, though this is not a charge we hear often.
Thank you again for reaching out. We hope this was helpful and we encourage you to reach out by phone if you need additional resources or need help figuring out your options. Our number is 1-800-786-2929 and our lines are always open. If you have a moment, we'd appreciate your feedback of our crisis services at the following link:

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

Stay safe!

[Guest]

im 16 years old and i live in ***** wisconsin. my parents are very verbally and emotionally abusive and told me to get the f*** out of their house, and i plan to go to my boyfriend's house and talk to him and his mom about moving in with them and not living at home. his mom already said yes to me living with them. im 16 so it's okay if i choose where i want to live, right? plz help

[ccsmod11]

Hi there,

Thanks for reaching out to us today to get some help. We want to acknowledge the bravery you showed in doing this, and we hope we can help.

It sounds like you’re in an emotionally abusive situation at home and you’re considering leaving. This is a perfectly normal response to abuse in the home, and we understand why you might consider leaving home. We want to let you know that you never deserve to be abused ever, for any reason. You also don’t deserve for your parents to threaten to, or to actually throw you out of the home. This can be considered neglect and is not legal for your parents to do. Call us at 1-800-786-2929 if you want to talk about any of the abusive experiences you’ve endured.

Unfortunately, it’s not necessarily true you can decide where to live in Wisconsin at age 16. We’re not legal experts, so what we tell you may not apply in your community, even if it applies in most of the U.S. Usually, if a runaway report is filed on a youth, the police are authorized to search for the youth and return them home. In most parts of the U.S., running away is not illegal and won’t result in a youth getting arrested or fined. Adults who you stay with could be charged for harboring a runaway, which is a very rare charge, but a charge you may want to know about. Penalties for this charge vary widely across the U.S.

Hopefully this helped. Thanks so much for reaching out to us. If you have any questions or want to talk more, please call us at 1-800-786-2929.


Best,
NRS