Welcome to the National Runaway Safeline Forum. Here you can post your questions, thoughts, and concerns about what it's like to be a teenager or a parent. If there's something you've been wondering about, please ask. Chances are good that a lot of other people have been wondering the same thing.
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I would like to run away to my gfs house is there any legal trouble?
I am not being accepted at home for who I am and I'm being pressured by my parents
I'm under 15
And live in New Mexico
Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline! That must be so hurtful to not be accepted at home and to be pressured by your parents. It sounds like you’ve been going through a really tough time, but we’re here to help you and support you in any way we can.
We’re not legal experts here at NRS, but generally, it is not illegal to run away from home. But your parents could file a runaway report, the police could bring you home, and the people you’re staying with could possibly get in legal trouble. Each city and state may have different policies and laws on runaways. If you haven’t already, you could consider calling your local non-emergency police phone number and asking about their policies on runaways. There are many resources that could help you get legal information about running away, help you work through conflict at home, or help you with anything else you may be struggling with. If you want more information about resources, or if you’d like to talk more about what’s been going on, you can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or chat with us online.
Again, thank you for contacting us. You’ve been going through a hard time, but you’ve shown strength by reaching out for help. If you ever need anything in the future please feel free to call us or chat with us online. We’re always here to listen and here to help.
Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.
i hate my life and want to run away to my friends house is this ok,my mom punishes me harshly and i can not deal with it I'm 13.can you help me i live in florida.
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you’ve been living a pretty difficult situation at home. We’re so glad you decided to reach out to us about what you’re going through.
We are not legal experts here but we can speak in general terms. 18 years old is generally the age that an individual may leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian. This age varies from state to state, you can confirm the legal age of majority by calling your local police department's non-emergency number.
If you are under 18 and leave home without permission, your parent/guardian may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city so we cannot predict exactly what would happen in your case. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. However, in that case there may be services (family counseling, etc.) available to you as a youth in crisis/runaway but again, police procedures related to offering those services can be different based on your location or the details of your situation.
Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. A good way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.
The easiest way to leave home is with your parent’s permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe your aunt or another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to mediate a conversation between you and your legal guardian. One option we have here at the National Runaway Safeline is a conference call. We could make sure that you are able to say how you are feeling and come up with a plan together for you to feel better at home. It also might be helpful to have someone that you really trust to know what is going on with your and your feelings, they can always provide you with direct support in person if you needed it, (i.e close friends, family members, school counselor, etc).
We understand that your situation is tough and it can be really hard to feel happy when you’re dealing with what you’ve been going through. You might also want to think about doing some self-care activities that you can practice on your own whenever you’re feeling a little frustrated with your situation. Some things that you can think about doing is, setting small goals and celebrating them when they are achieved, maybe make a list of positive traits that you like about yourself, maybe establishing a hobby that makes you feel good about yourself, even try challenging your negative thoughts by asking their validity or by rethinking them in a positive manner (i.e. turn "I am a slow worker" into "I am a worker who takes time to do well at a task"). Starting a journal could also help you with these tasks. Having it all written down in front of you can put things in prospective on how many great things you do from day to day.
Please do not hesitate to call if you have questions or need to talk. We can explore your situation, go over all your options, and come up with a plan and resources to deal with your situation over the phone or on live chat. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.
Take care,
NRS
Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.
National Runaway Safeline [email protected] (Crisis Email)
1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
Tell us what you think about your experience!
hey i was beaten numerous times with a belt and hand hand to the fase and belt to the body.i am planing an escape in the morning before school i live in illionios. i am 13. Is it legal i am going to live behind walgreens. I plan on never coming back
Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds as though you are in an unsafe situation and are dealing with a lot of physical harm in your house. You do not deserve to be treated the way you have been and do not deserve to feel unsafe in your house. We are here to listen to you and help you as best we can.
It sounds as though you are thinking about leaving in the morning and going to live behind Walgreens and want to know if that is legal for you to do. Some things to think about before leaving are how you will feed yourself, clean yourself, and keep yourself safe from the rain and cold if you’re planning on living behind Walgreens. Some options to think about include seeing if there are any friends or relatives you can stay with for a little bit while you come up with a long term plan or giving us a call here at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we can help you try to find help in your area.
To answer your question, since you are 13 you are considered a minor in the state of Illinois so if you leave home your parents could file a runaway report and if the police find you they might need to take you back home. This does include running away to a friend or relative’s house (without your parent’s permission) if you do decide to choose that route. Your friend or relative could also be charged with harboring a minor if your parents file a runaway report and the police find you at their house.
Something else to consider is filing a child abuse report. You can do this by calling the police, asking a teacher or school counselor you trust to do it, or giving us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and we can help you do that. Filing a report will make it known to others that this abuse is happening and potentially get child protective services to help you get somewhere you feel safer.
If these ideas don’t sound like ones that fit your situation you can also give us a call 24/7 toll free at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or talk to us on our chat services at 1800runaway.org.
We wish you the best of luck finding a situation that is safer for you and we are here to talk to you and help you as best we can. Don’t hesitate to give us a call or utilize our chat services.
Hi, I am 15 years old. I live in New York. My mom and I are constantly fighting and arguing. She verbally abuses me. I've wanted to run away for years. If I were to go to a friends house for a couple of days, would I or my friend and his parents get into any leagal trouble?
Unfortunately we cannot tell you exactly whether or not your friends parents could get into legal trouble, since are not a legal agency. Because of your age and the fact that your parents would be legally responsible for you, we would imagine that it is possible your friends parents could be charged with harboring a runaway. If you need more information you can contact the local non emergency police.
Hi I'm a 13 year old boy and I wanna run away because of my anxiety and the stress I have and also my school has caused all of this. I have thought about it quite a while, I know its a silly reason but I want to run away to my friends house, will anyone be in trouble, I live in Southern California
Hi, thank you so much for reaching out to us. We’re glad you did. The stress and anxiety of school can be so overwhelming. It’s not silly at all that it would make you want to run away. It’s normal to want to press the pause button. We will try to provide you with some resources and information that can help. Also, please remember our volunteers are online and on the phone 24/7 should you want to chat or talk about this in real time at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
It’s very kind of you to consider how others will be affected if you runaway. First you should know, you can’t be arrested for running away. If you decide to run away, your parents have the option to file a runaway report. Running away is a status offense. This would mean that the police would have to bring you home should they find you. As far as other people getting in trouble, there is a possibility that your friend or his/her parents could be charged for harboring a runaway. This happens if your friend’s parents know you are a runaway, the police find you at their home and your parents choose to press charges.
It sounds like you have a supportive friend, but have you tried talking to your parents about how you’ve been feeling? What about a school guidance counselor, academic advisor, or teacher that you trust? When you’re overwhelmed it can be hard to tell others you need help. However, if you let them know how you’re feeling they may be able to work with your teachers to create a better schedule for you.
It sounds like you have a lot on your plate and it’s completely understandable that you’d be feeling overwhelmed. We hope this was helpful for you. If you’d like to talk more about this, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
I'm 17 and I live in Tennessee but I want to run away to live with someone else in a different state... my mom treats me like I'm 10 and won't let me be a teenager... I don't what to do
Hello,
Thank you for reaching out to NRS. We are glad to see that you are thinking through your options. That shows a great deal of maturity on your part. It can be very frustrating when we are not allowed to be ourselves.
You mentioned that you are thinking of running away from your home in Tennessee to live with someone else in another state. You also mentioned that your mom does not allow you to act like a teenager. This sounds like a very difficult situation to be in, and we are sorry you are going through this. We have a few options that may be helpful for you. Here at NRS, we have a conference call service. This is basically a three-way call between our caller, the parent/guardian, and one of our liners. This may be an option if you think it will help to open up the lines of communication with your mom. (You would have to call our hotline for this.) As far as running away goes, we are not legal experts here at NRS, but we do have some general information about the topic. To our limited knowledge, if you were to run away, your parent/guardian can file a runaway report. If this report is filed, the police will look for you and take you back home when they find you. It doesn’t matter if you have crossed state lines because once a runaway report is filed that report will be entered in the NCIC which is their national database. So if you were caught in a different state you will still come up as an active runaway. If a runaway report is filed, the person that you are staying with may get in legal trouble for harboring a runaway.
Again, thank you for reaching out to us. We are glad to see you are looking at your options before making a decision that can potentially change your life. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call our hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY or start a live chat with us. We are here to help, we are here to listen.
I want to run away and live with my grandparents on my real fathers side... but my mother doesn't know that im trying to runaway. I live in a state where it isn't illegal to runaway. And my reason for wanting to runaway is the verbal abuse and mistreatment from my mother
It sounds like you’re going through a lot right now, but we commend you for being wise enough to reach out! From the sounds of things, it looks like you’re trying to explore all of your options and your frustrated with your mother’s behavior at home. You also mentioned abuse from your mother, we’re really sorry to hear you’re going through that. Abuse is never okay at home and it’s good you’re trying to talk to someone about this. There are possible options to consider, especially if your mom has ever been physically abusive, like reporting your mother for child abuse if that is something you’re comfortable with. Additionally, if you call us at 1-800-Runaway we can also file the child abuse report for you.
As far as running away is concerned, you’re correct, running away is generally not considered illegal. It is a status offense though, meaning you’re not allowed to do it because you’re underage. You would not get arrested for running away, but you would get brought back home by the police if they found you. One other thing to note is that although running isn’t illegal in most areas, harboring a runaway is. This means that any adult that knowingly lets a runaway youth stay with them and doesn’t contact the police, the youth’s legal guardians or CPS, they could get in trouble for harboring a runaway
.
Since you’re a minor, your mom has the right to file a runaway report with the police. This report gets put into their national database. Depending on the police department, that may be the extent of what the police do as far as trying to locate you goes. Some police departments though will search for you by talking to friends, family, school or tracking records (phone, ATM cards, computer, etc). Generally, when a runaway youth is found they are returned home.
There are two other legal options to leave home: 1) Parent’s permission: if your parents gave you permission to live somewhere else (given it’s a safe place.) and 2) Emancipation. This is a legal avenue that involves going to court to try and get emancipated from your parents and become your own legal guardian. Emancipation can sometimes be a pretty long and tricky process, though. For more information about this in your statue, usually contacting the local family court is the best starting point, or you can cal us and we can give you some phone numbers to call!
If both you and your mom have had verbal arguments, it might be helpful to talk to a professional counselor who can help you strategize the best ways to communicate with her or even mediate a session between the two of you. Otherwise, here at the National Runaway Safeline, we are always available to talk through your situation and try and help you come up with the best, safest plan of action. We’re available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The number is 1-800-Runaway. Call anytime.
i've been thinking about running away for a little while now (i'm 15 yrs old i'm gonna be 16 in September) mainly because my parents are divorced and my moms boyfriend thinks he can control my life and thinks i'm gonna go off and meet up with guys and go do bad things with them when my parents aren't home and he thinks he can go through my phone when ever he wants to and they aren't married and he once has pressured me into trying to make me call him dad and my dad is in a rehab place right now so i can't go live with him and my mom always take her boyfriends side with everything and no one has any trust in me anymore... i dont know what to do please help.
Thank you for writing us at the National Runaway Safeline. We’re here to listen, and here to help. Sorry to hear that you are not too happy at home with your mom and her boyfriend. It seems like the divorce has been challenging for you. It seems like you have a better relationship with your dad, only he is not available now due to being in rehab.
Have you ever considered talking to your mom and/or her boyfriend about how you feel? It may be that he believes that he loves you and that he wants to be a parent figure for you and treat you as he would his own child. It could be that he does not realize he is overstepping his boundaries. In any case, you deserve to be treated respectfully, and it is understandable why you are looking for ways to leave the situation you are in behind.
As you may be aware, running away is a status offense. This means that your parents have a right to file a runaway report. Your information would be put into a police database, nationwide. Moreover, anyone who helps a runaway can be charged with harboring a runaway.
We would love to talk to you and provide individualized support. Feel free to call or chat with us. We can discuss more about your options and plan.
I'm 13 and I've been through too much that I started hurting myself, my mom doesn't treat me the same way she used to when I was younger and "prettier" and more happy she acts like she's just that type of mom on T.V but when we get home she changes, and I'm sick of it. I already packed my clothes and my friend already knows about it and she said I'm welcome. But will it have legal issues involved with it? I'm in Ohio.
Hi,
Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It is really frustrating that your mom acts one way in public, and then treats you very differently in private. It is totally understandable you would want to move out.
We are not legal experts, but we can talk about some legal issues. You are still under 18, which means you are a minor. That means that your parents or legal guardians are still in charge of where you live. Running away is not illegal, but there are some repercussions that can happen. Your mom could file a runaway report, which means that she reports you missing and if the cops find you, they would bring you home. Your mom could also press charges against your friend for “harboring a runaway”, which means your friend could get in trouble. Every situation is different, but these are some things to think about.
It sounds like you have been through a lot, and it is totally understandable that you have started hurting yourself. If you want to talk about any of this, feel free to call us at 1-800-786-2929. Another option is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, if you feel comfortable reaching out to them. Their number is 1-800-273-8255.
Thanks,
NRS
I am a 16 year old girl living in Chicago, Illinois. My parents don't understand me. And they don't bother to either. My mother says that my opinion doesn't matter on anything, even when it pertains to me. I am a good kid, not saying it just cause of myself, I have almost straight As except for a high B in AP Statistics and I attend Northside College Prep (best cps highschool in Illinois). I also have good morals my parents have taught me and I have decided to follow. I don't like lying and I try not to, I am Christian and I love God, I have never smoked weed or done any other drug or have gotten drunk. I am even against premarital sex. My parents simply don't trust me. They don't let me stay afterschool with my boyfriend in the school cafeteria to watch a movie or anything. I've tried talking to them and making them understand that they are just hurting me when they yell at me for no reason. They don't care. My parents are not bad parents in the sense that they do not physically hurt me, atleast not anymore since Hispanic parents do tend to beat their kids when they are young. They don't call me bad words or say I am a burden. They just don't trust me and don't care about what I want or what I feel. All I ask for is a bit of independence such a part time job on weekends at the grocery store behind my house and trust that I won't hurt myself. I ran away two weeks ago for a week and lived at my friend's house. They treated me so well, I feel completely in debt with their hospitality despite their financial and legal status, they never asked anything of me just that I not drop out of school. However, I went back home because my father said my mother has been crying all week since I left and because he said that they were ready to call the police and have them arrest anyone taking care of me. My friend's mom is illegal and a single mother with 3 children and a baby grandson. Most of them dropped out of school and work at fastfood rastaurants and money is tight. The last thing I wanted was to have their undocumented mother, who has treated me so well, get arrested because of me. So I want to know, if I go back, can my parents get her arrested, despite my consent? Or let's say that she can, can i legally move in with my father's sister, my aunt, without my parent's consent?
Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are a very hard worker and you seem very dedicated to your education and faith. We are sorry to hear that your parents don’t trust you. It sounds like you really care about your parents, you just wish that they would give you some freedom. The fastest way that you would be able to move in with a family member of friend would be to get your parent’s permission. Since you are 16, your parents could file a runaway report if you were to leave home. Running away is not illegal but if the police find you, they would return you home to your parents. If you decided to runaway again, the people that you are staying with could get in trouble for harboring a runaway. If you have any other questions or concerns please feel free to contact us through our 24 crisis hotline (1-800-7866-2929) or via email, live chat.
- NRS
Hey, so my best friend wants to run away and stay with me at least until things are sorted out. She is wondering what the best way to leave is and if there are any legal concerns. Her mom can be considered verbally/mentally abusive by fat-shaming her, cursing at her, calling her names and curse words, screaming at her for stuff she didn't do, lying, blaming everything on her, and ignoring all her problems. We both live in Tennessee and we think she definitely has a reason to run away. My mom is okay with her staying with us for a while. What should we do? And are there any legal issues we should be concerned about?
Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. I’m sorry to hear that your friend is in a stressful situation at home. Abuse of any kind is not acceptable. It’s understandable that she wants to get away from it. I’m sure your support is a big comfort to her.
We are not legal experts however, I can tell you that in the state of Tennessee, the legal age of adulthood is 18. If your friend is younger than 18 and she leaves home without permission it is not illegal but her mom could file a runaway report and there’s a chance that if the police find her they will take her back home. If you and your Mom take her in and a runaway report is filed, it’s also possible that your Mom could be at risk for unlawful harboring of a minor.
Has your friend considered filing a complaint with Child Protective Services regarding the abuse she is experiencing? That is one option she might want to consider. If there is an adult at school like a counselor or a teacher that she trusts, she could reach out to him/her to get some advice. These are just some ideas. We take calls 24 hours a day/7 days a week and we’d be glad to speak to you or your friend to learn more about the situation and determine how else we might help her.
Take care and thank you for looking out for your friend.
I am a 14 year old boy. And my mom has abused me since I was 3 I want to go to some where else. My parents are devorced and my dad lives in Virginia and was in the navy but retires in November. My mom is trying to find a place for me TONIGHT. I want to leave and was wondering if it is legal to leave because of my situation. What do I do? I live in New York Rochester
Thank you so much for reaching out. We’re sorry to hear that you’re going through this. You’re so brave for reaching out to find out more information before moving forward with your plan of action.
We are not legal experts, but from what we can find, in the state of New York, being under the age of 18 means that someone is a minor. A minor by law still needs consent from legal guardians or parents in order to move somewhere else. If the parent or guardian were to want to find out where the minor went, they could potentially file a runaway report. You mentioned that you’ve been abused by your mother since you were 3. Have you ever told anyone else about this? You don’t deserve to be treated that way and hurt. If you wanted to find out more information about filing an abuse report, you can call Child Help at (800) 422-4453 or look at their website at childhelp.org. You can also always call us here for more information or to talk more.
We are 24/7 and we’re here for you. Thank you again for reaching out and we really hope your situation gets better.
My life at home sucks, just like everyone else here I suppose. My mom keeps telling me I'm crazy and trying to get me admitted to a mental health hospital so I can stay there and be out of her life. She's always locking me out of the house and telling me to find a new place to live. If I were to go live at a friends house, what would the legal implications be like? I don't want to get them in trouble, but I also don't feel safe in my home. Advice is needed!
Thanks for posting on our forum! We’re glad that you found us and reached out for help.
Yes, many of the youth who post on our forum are dealing with difficult times, however, your situation is just as important! You’re feelings are completely valid and it sounds like your mom has been neglectful.
You mentioned that she is always locking you out of the house and telling you to find somewhere to live. It is considered neglect for parents/guardians to kick/lock minors (youth under the age of 1 out of the home. You have the right to report her if it happens again, we can help you make the report if that’s an option you decide on making. In the event that you mom kicks you out again, we can call the police together and let them know that she is not letting you in the home. She may try to make a runaway report with the police, if she doesn’t want to get in trouble for neglect. However, running away is not something that you can be arrested for. In runaway situations, we have heard of the charge “harboring a runaway”, on adults who allow runaways to stay at their home. It’s not a common charge we hear of and it’s very hard to prove. We also offer a service where we call, with youth, to their local police station. Since we’re not legal experts that is a great service to find out exactly what your local police protocols are. If your mom gives you permission to live with a friend, that is legal, but you may want to get that permission in writing (just in case your mom tries to change her mind).
We are here to talk more about your situation, you definitely don’t deserve to be treated in the way that your mom has been treating you. Unfortunately, we’re non-directive, so we cannot give out advice. We are open 24/7, so we’re always here to help and listen.
out of the home. You have the right to report her if it happens again, we can help you make the report if that’s an option you decide on making. In the event that you mom kicks you out again, we can call the police together and let them know that she is not letting you in the home. She may try to make a runaway report with the police, if she doesn’t want to get in trouble for neglect. However, running away is not something that you can be arrested for. In runaway situations, we have heard of the charge “harboring a runaway”, on adults who allow runaways to stay at their home. It’s not a common charge we hear of and it’s very hard to prove. We also offer a service where we call, with youth, to their local police station. Since we’re not legal experts that is a great service to find out exactly what your local police protocols are. If your mom gives you permission to live with a friend, that is legal, but you may want to get that permission in writing (just in case your mom tries to change her mind). 
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