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  • Hi I’m 14 and living in *****.. I don’t want to stay at my home, my sister is suicidal and all my parents do is yell and scream im scared I tend to flinch at everything now, my mom screams she wants to die and blames us, I hate life I just want to run away to my friends house she lives three hours away from me. I don’t want to get her into any trouble or her family’s. I’m seriously scared to stay at home the screaming yelling hitting cutting slapping is getting to much for me that I start having panic attacks at home and school. I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety and PTSD. I just want to be happy even if that means running away and getting away with it for a week. Please I can’t do this anymore.
    Last edited by ccsmod5; 02-17-2021, 05:13 AM.

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    • ccsmod5
      ccsmod5 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for reaching out to us and sharing what’s been going on at home. It sounds like its been pretty overwhelming, with both your mom and your sister. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
      It seems like your describing emotional and verbal abuse from your mom. Please remember that you do not deserve to be spoken to this way at all. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.
      If you’re planning to runaway to your friend’s house, you should know that running away is not a crime. You wouldn’t be arrested or anything like that, but the people housing you could be charged with harboring a runaway. It might not be all that likely but it’s a possibility. You could consider arranging a visit to your friend’s house with parental permission if you think that’s doable.
      We hope this helps, please reach out if we can offer any further support.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • My grandma said I can never see or talk to my best friend ever again. I am secretly emailing her but she can can barely email me back because she is not in virtual school. My grandma said that because I stayed up 5 minutes past my bedtime because my friend was texting me her address so I could send her a birthday card. And then I got in trouble and told me grandma that she can't keep best friends away from each other. The she said that I can't tell her what she can't do. So I want to runaway to run away to my friends house but she lives 45 minutes away so I will just tell her to drive here at night and pick me up. Also I am 12 years old and her mom is really nice because she is like a mom to me because me and my friend have known each other almost our whole lives. So is it illegal in Alabama.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there thanks for reaching out to NRS,
      It seems like you are going through a tough time with your grandma and are under some harsh restrictions right now. It sounds like you are really frustrated by the limits your grandma has placed and after staying up a fairly short time past what she considers OK she came down with a harsh punishment you don’t agree with. She certainly doesn’t have a right to dictate who you consider your friends to be.
      We aren’t legal experts but generally leaving home without your permission to stay with your friends would be a status offence and you can be labelled as a runaway. A status offence means that you wouldn’t be arrested or put in jail/juvenile detention, but that police can still bring you back home. Your friends’ mom might also end up at risk of harboring a runaway charge which is a criminal offence and comes with fines or jail time potentially. If you want to explore the option more it might make sense to talk with your local police department, or an officer at school if it has one.
      Running away might not be your only option to manage the situation, we are here to talk about the situation more with you if you would like. Sometimes having somewhere safe to talk and explore options can help to see options you didn’t see before. If you would like that you can contact us 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929 or www.1800runway.org.
      We hope to hear from you again soon,
      NRS

  • I am a 16 year old girl I live in Colorado I can't stay at my house anymore I don't get along with my siblings and I have no space or privacy of any kind and I don't get along with my mother at all we always fight I feel verbally abused sometimes I have a friend I can stay with he is 35 he has kids of his own but I don't want him to get in trouble for him helping me out with the things I need I used to babysit his children that's how I know him if I stay in his spare bedroom is he likely to go to jail for letting me live at his house? I just don't want problems for him he is a very good guy and takes care of his kids can you give me advice what do I do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for reaching out to NRS through our online forum posts-it takes a lot of courage to do so especially when some difficulty arises at home. First and foremost, privacy and a space to get away from the rest of your family within your own home is definitely key to alleviating some stress and being able to relax. Additionally, you most definitely do not deserve to be verbally abused and especially by your own mother-you should be able to feel safe in your own home and communicate openly with your family. Since you are experiencing some difficulties in getting along with your family as well as having some healthy boundaries at home, it is definitely understandable that you have already reached out to your friend for help. However, something to keep in mind is that the age of majority in Colorado is 18 years of age, meaning that you are not considered your own legal guardian until you are that age. So, in the case that your mother decides to file what is called a runaway report with your local police, it is possible that you would be brought back home to your mother i.e. your legal guardian. This is the extent of what if the local authorities could do if they were to locate you. If you as well as your friend comply with the police if they were to find you at your friend’s, neither of you would suffer any criminal charges. One thing to consider doing as well is to let a trusted family member or friend who lives outside of your house know of what is going on at home as well as your plan to stay with your friend just as a safety precaution. A helpful service that we offer is the chance to have a conference call between you and you mother, which allows you two to discuss openly with each other how you feel about what is going on as well as each others’ expectations. The entire conversation would be mediated by someone who works with NRS. If you should have any further questions about anything mentioned above or would like to discuss further your situation, please do not hesitate to reach out to NRS directly at 1(800)-RUNAWAY or 1(800) 786-2929. We are here to listen and help to the best of our ability 24/7.

  • Hello, I am 17 years old and i've been considering running away. My household is quite toxic and I don't want to be surrounded in the environment no more. My friend has told me multiple times that I could stay at his house, but the thing is that I don't want to get anyone in trouble.
    What can I do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod3
      ccsmod3 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey there. Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step.

      We're sorry to hear that your household is toxic and causing you to consider leaving. That must be pretty tough. That said, running away is a big decision, and it's a good idea to spend some time thinking through a plan before committing to it. Consider where you'll go, how you'll get there, and what you'll do to survive once you're there. It sounds like you've given some thought to the *where* element, and it's great that you have someone you trust that you can stay with. However, it's definitely wise that you're trying to be aware of any issues that could arise in staying with him (or anyone else for that matter).

      Most states have laws around the harboring of a runaway, which essentially means that anyone who allows you to stay with them without proper notification to your parents/legal guardians or a welfare agency (like Child Protective Services) could be considered to be taking part in a crime. If your friend is under the age of 18 and you'd be staying with his family, this is something that would affect his parents. If he is 18 or older and you'd be staying with him and/or other adult roommates, that risk would fall onto the individuals who are 18 and older.

      The best way to avoid getting anyone into trouble in this regard is to have your parent's consent in staying there. Obviously we know that this can be a challenging conversation for some, but it can be a good way to ensure that everyone's wellbeing is preserved. If this isn't on the table, it's a good idea to research what the exact laws are in your state, and then have a conversation with the people you'd be staying with ahead of time to make sure they're aware of the risks. They might be willing to let you stay with them despite. Other options to consider when running away at your age are homeless shelters, transitional living programs, and/or filing a report with CPS if any abuse is happening in the home. If college is on the table, you can also consider staying on campus and developing a well thought out plan in the meantime.

      If you'd like to talk in more detail, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY or by chatting with us live through our website at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

      Take care.

      NRS

  • i live in grand rapids michigan and i want to runaway my mom is very verrbally abusive to me i want to runaway to Detroit to my friends house and stay there how do i not get caught HELPPP

    i want to runaway my mom is very verbally abusive and i want to go to detroit but my stepdad is a cop how do i not get caught HELPPPP
    Last edited by ccsmod0; 03-22-2021, 11:45 PM.

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with the verbal abuse. You do not deserve to be harmed in any way. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • hi im 14 and my adopive parents saw that i waz talking to people from a game and they are really mad at me they will not talk to me and every day i feel like they hate me and wish they never adopted me. so i am think about runing away to by bffs house my mom knows her mom but i waz wondering that if i go to my bff house if i will get in trouble and i get my bffs mom in trouble. i live in texas

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws since you plan on leaving at 14 years old.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • i’m 14 and don’t have a horrible home life compared to most it’s just a lot of pressure from my parents and i have an absolutely horrible relationship with my dad that cannot be fixed or forgiven. if my friend who lives out of state were to pick me up with my full consent and i would go to live with them could i get any criminal charges and could my friend or their parents get any charges or fines. i’m not sure how my parents would react and if they’d want me back or not.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS
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