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  • #31
    I’m 16 and I don’t want to live with my parents. I don’t get along with my step dad. If I left at 16 what would be the consequences. I just don’t want to be around my step dad anymore. He tells me he doesn’t give a shi* about me and that if I left he wouldn’t care. The other day I told him hey you should use this grinding wheel instead of that cutting wheel on the metal. He got mad and said that I always have something to say, the he came forward very fast at me and grabbed me, instincts kicked in and I grabbed his side and his chest, and as he wrapped his hand around my neck I over powered him and pushed him out the shed and made him hit his head on the shead then I pushed him into the trailer then a couple seconds later he let go. I don’t want to be here no more, he also hurt my mother sometimes. I have had three jobs, I currently don’t have a job. But I have people who would help me but I don’t want them to get in trouble for harboring a runaway. What should I do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod16
      ccsmod16 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi,
      Thank you for reaching out to us; we are glad that you did. It sounds like things have been really stressful and difficult at home and that it sounds like your step dad has been physical toward you mom, and that the situation is escalating towards you. We are glad that you were able to defend yourself, but you shouldn’t have to do that at home. Neither you nor you mom deserve to be treated this way. It is understandable that you want to go someplace safe.

      You have been so brave to survive this, and also to tell us about what you are going through. You deserve to be safe and well treated. If your mom is ever looking for help, the National Domestic Violence Hotline (thehotline.org) is available to help her at 1800-799-7233.

      Everything you are asking about your own situation are all good questions, and we want to help you figure out what your options are, but a public forum isn’t the best way to do that. We want to help you, in your unique situation and the best way for us to help you is to have a conversation with you either through our phone hotline or via live chat. You can reach us at 1800-RUNAWAY or chat at www.1800runaway.org We are here 24/7 and all of our services are confidential.

      Sincerely,

      NRS

  • #32
    I’m 16 about to turn 17 but I’m pregnant. I live with my stepdad and mom but my dad wants me to go live with him . But my mom doesn’t want me too.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks for reaching out to us. It sounds like you might want to live with your dad but there may be some custody issues. We'd like to help you explore what your options are but need a bit more information from you to see how we can help. If you give us a call we can work with you to see what your next best steps are. We also have a large database of resources: things like legal aid, for instance, that might be able to assist with custody issues. Also, if you need any help finding reproductive healthcare, we can pass along resources to you.

      Our hotline is confidential and open 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat with us online via the portal at www.1800runaway.org. We hope to hear from you soon!

      All the best,
      NRS

  • #33
    I’m 16 and really don’t wanna live with my mom. it’s holding me back from having a better future. what do i have to do to move asap at 16

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      The easiest way to leave home is with your parents' permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how you’re feeling to your parents. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you would like to look into further emotional support options, you can text with a crisis worker at the National Alliance on Mental Illness 24/7 by texting "NAMI" to 741741.
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS

  • #34
    My boyfriend & I had to report bad abuse going on in his home. Under normal circumstances DSS would immediately take them all away to a safer place. (We live in South Carolina) Though COVID has made this different... I’m pregnant with his child & since we tried to help the kids & himself they’re punishing him for putting them (his parents) in legal trouble. I have a bad history with depression & his family is deciding he should never see me again. My boyfriend is not well either and I feel so betrayed that DSS isn’t there to help & now the abuse is worse because he spoke up. Because of the extent of it all I’m not mentally sound or in a safe mental space & my boyfriend wants to be there for us & the development of our child (especially the pregnancy- I’ve had health issues & they are caused from extreme stress/genetics where I should of been hospitalized). Besides that my single mother & I cannot afford to get the baby things & I am not able to get a job, I tried & it didn’t work out because of my physical health. They won’t let him have a job either... We want the baby, & we are not getting rid of him. We need help. DSS has seemed to fail us & my boyfriend is considering running away, it’s a crime to harbor here so he’s thought about that he can keep doing it until the law listens to him properly. But we don’t know if that will help more or hurt. He wants my mother to have custody over him. My mother & I don’t have much but we have provided him with more clothing, food, emotional support, & family than his own ever has. We have also given him other things that his family occasionally did not get like hygiene products & properly safe drinking water. He is constantly dehydrated... I don’t know what to do especially since this was awful before but now I feel suicidal & trying to figure out ways to have my baby be safe. I don’t want this, I want everything to work out. Though I don’t trust myself right now, and I’m so desperate, lost, & scared.

    Comment


    • ccsmod4
      ccsmod4 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

      We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things in your life right now.
      It sounds like you’re fearing that the stress from the situation is getting harder and harder to handle.
      We are sorry you are going through a tough emotional time.
      Being pregnant and witnessing what your boyfriend is facing has been upsetting and a frustrating situation for you. With the abuse continuing he might consider informing child services again and filing another report. It sounds like your mother is willing to take him in so he might ask if that can be an option for him. You might use this link to see if there are any safe place shelters in his area. www.nationalsafeplace.org

      We understand that this has been a most difficult time for you and him. He nor his siblings deserve to be abused. It's not their fault that this is happening.
      Sometimes when things are too stressful it might help to talk with someone about it.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.

      NRS is here to listen and here to help.
      We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. If you are experiencing signs of depression or having suicidal thoughts we encourage you to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255

      If you or he would like to talk and or explore possible options of help, our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). What you did today by reaching out was great. Good for you.


      Take care,
      NRS

  • #35
    I'm not entirely sure if I want to move out, or just be away for a long time but I turn 17 in October, and I have a part time job so my choices are getting slightly more broad. I live in Aiken SC, and most of my friends live in Columbia that have offered to let me stay and my parents don't know most of them. I've been told to contact Child services because both my parents are verbally abusive, and at times caused me to go into panic attacks and even physically abused me but I don't want to resort to that just yet. My dad has threatened multiple times to get me fired, and I can barely drive from what he's taught me, which he has refused to continue teaching me stating driving is a privilege that I do not deserve, so I am still stuck with just a permit. I don't have a lot saved up, maybe a rent's due if I were to have an apartment, but I would only be paying for food and clothing with a friend. I should also mention I am a grade behind, and have always struggled with balancing schoolwork and my mental health since I was 11, along with the behavior of my parents which I didn't comprehend as abuse until last year. I've been homeschooled all my life, and used to hop between co-ops but now fully at home. I've been given only a week to completely heal mentally and catch up a year's worth of schoolwork, or I lose my job. (My parents have also taken money out of my minor bank account, around 190 dollars for a small dent in the fridge that I caused during a breakdown.) I need a better overall opinion on what I should do about all of this. I could go much deeper into my situation but this is the just of it, I hope its enough information. I've never used forums before for family related situations so I'm hoping I conclude a next step after this.

    Comment


    • ccsmod13
      ccsmod13 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It takes a lot of bravery to reach out, and we appreciate your ability to share what you're going through. We are here to support you. It sounds like there is a lot that you are faced with right now, and that you feel like leaving home may be your only option. It seems as though you want a little more guidance on what this may look like.

      You mentioned that you have been experiencing some abuse at home. you do not deserve to be treated this way, and it is your parents’ responsibility to keep you safe. If you ever feel unsafe at home or you decide to go this route, this is a resource that may help you with the reporting process. (www.ChildHelp.org).

      It is important to have an understanding of what leaving your home may look like and to have a solid plan so that you can stay as safe as possible. You may want to consider if you have a safe place to stay, who is in your support system and can provide help, and how your parents might react. Since the legal age that a youth is permitted to leave home is generally 18, there is a possibility that your parents could file a runaway report. You will not get into any legal trouble, but your parents can ask that police return you home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

      You also mentioned your struggles with your mental health. It could be helpful to begin by finding more support to work through this and begin your healing journey before making other big decisions. You may want to think about who you can reach out to, or what resources you can contact if you aren’t ready to talk to someone in person. Possible options could be family members, a teacher, or a counselor at school. The National Alliance on Mental Illness is a resource that can provide you with some mental health support. If you would like to do so, you can text “connect” to 741741 to communicate with a crisis counselor 24/7.

      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.

      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

      Be safe and stay strong,

      NRS

  • #36
    I’m 16 and I want to move to move out my house hold is too toxic and I can’t take living here any more what can I do

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,

      Thanks ever so much for reaching out to us. We are so sorry to hear that your home situation has made it so difficult for you to be comfortable staying there. It sounds like you would like to move out and you have questions about how to do so. Although we are not legal experts, we will do our best to share information that may help you figure out your next steps.

      In most states, the age at which a youth is considered a legal adult is 18 years old. If you are considered a minor in your state and you would like to move out, the easiest way to do so is with the consent of your parent or legal guardian. If you leave without their consent, your parent or legal guardian can report you as a runaway to your local police department. Although it is technically not illegal to run away, it is considered a status offense in some states. How local police handle runaway reports can vary from place to place, but typically, if they locate a runaway youth, they return the youth to their parent/legal guardian or have the parent/legal guardian pick the youth up. Because the process can vary from place to place, the best source of information is typically the local non-emergency police or your local legal aid agency. If you would like information on resources in your area, or if you just want to talk about your situation, don't hesitate to reach out to us.

      Whatever you decide, know that we are here to support you. We cannot tell you what to do, but we will do our best to help you stay as safe as possible as you figure out your next steps. We can best help by phone or chat, and can be reached 24/7 by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button). If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

      We are here to listen, here to help. Stay safe!
      -NRS

  • #37
    i turn 16 next june and was wondering if there is anyway to leave my home in sc before then

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for contacting National Runaway Safeline. It was brave of you to reach out for support. Please know that we can always provide you with the support you need. It might be a good idea to see if you are able to call in or chat online (1-800-786-2929 or www.1800runaway.org) to get more specific details regarding what to do in your situation. We have many resources that can help youth find shelters, counseling services, legal information, and much more. We are also here to provide support if you need someone to vent to.



      You mentioned that you really want to leave home. Some information that might be helpful to keep in mind is that those who are younger than 18 typically cannot leave home without their guardian’s permission. So if you were to run away, your parents or guardian can call the police to file a runaway report. If that were to happen, they could look for you and bring you back home if found.

      You are going through a lot, and we appreciate you reaching out to us. Please feel free to contact us whenever is suitable for you as we are open 24/7. If you feel that you are in immediate danger, please do not hesitate to contact the police (911) to get immediate assistance.

      We hope to hear from you soon,
      NRS

  • #38
    So I am a 15 year old female in south carolina and i turn 16 on january 2nd. I planned to move out once I turn 17 but recently I've heard that the law had been changed to 16. There no way my parents would let me leave so I'd have to runaway. I have a trusted person I'd stay with who can support me. My father doesnt have a job, no income, stays in a canper in my gmas driveway but he has custody. The person id be running away to is gis ex wife(not my blood) and she has a job, makes 500-1k weekly, 7 acres and a home, farm and has a vegicle and 1 child. She has already stated I can love with her. My current situation is very very toxic and giving me mental health issues and has been for quite some time. I wont go into detail. But basically, if I run away when I turn 16 to her house, would police make me come home?

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
      We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
      Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
      Be safe,
      NRS
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