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17 and need to move out, is there a loophole?

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  • 17 and need to move out, is there a loophole?

    I'm sixteen years old, my birthday is in a few days. I have talked to my mother about moving out to live with my boyfriend when my seventeenth birthday arrives. At first she told me she didn't care and to move out, now that the time is getting closer she isn't so sure. We got into an argument, I know legally she can keep me until I am eighteen. Although I can not stand living with her for personal reasons. If I continue to live with my mother past my seventeenth birthday there is no doubt that i will have to drop out of high school. If i move i can stay in high school while living with my boyfriend eventually graduating. I will be supported with any needs I have while living away from home. The confusing part is if I drop out of high school i can not live at home and I'll have to move out. There is no way to get around this in her eyes and i do not want to be a high school dropout. Is there any loophole in this? I also live in Pennsylvania (i know laws differ within states)

  • #2
    17 and need to move out, is there a loophole?

    Hello there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you have been through a lot with your mother. Just to let you know, you do have the right to go to school regardless of your living situation under the McKinny Vento Act. This means that even if you are homeless the schools must give you access to your education.

    If you were to leave home, your mom would have the right to report you missing, as well as file charges against your friends for 'harboring a runaway'. If you are feeling unsafe at home you always have the right to go to a youth shelter or contact Child Protective Services.

    If you would like to further discuss your options, we would be happy to help you come up with a plan and brainstorm some idea of what else you can do. We also have a large database of resources if you would like help finding legal aid in your area. We can be reached at any time at 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929) or by live chat at www.1800runaway.org from 4:30pm-11:30pm Central Standard Time. We look forward to hearing from you and wish you the best of luck!

    - NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      I am 17 years old and i am wanting to move out. I understand that a person can be charged with harboring a run away but if the parent knows that the child left and didn't file a run away report would that be fine i am mainly not wanting to get my friends parents in trouble for taking me in. I know that alot of people think that a child running away at 17 is being rebellious but i genuinely dislike living at home and no longer want to live there nor will i any longer i just wanted some insite on the situation the place im going is alot better and the people are way more loving and supporting my parents are not bad people nor do they abuse me its just other things advice and a speedy response would be great thanks and have a great day.

      Comment


      • ccsmod7
        ccsmod7 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are in a tricky situation and you are no longer wanting to live at home. Here at NRS, we truly want to be a support for you and inform you as best we can during this difficult time.

        We are not legal experts but we can speak generally. If you leave home at 17, and your parents do not file you as a runaway, there is no way that who you are with can be charged with harboring a runaway by your parents. You have to be listed as a runaway for someone to be at risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. Only if your parents report you as a runaway with local police and you are found, then your parents might have the ability to press harboring a runaway charges on the legal adult who knowingly houses you as a runaway.

        We hope that information answers your question. We are always here if you would like to talk through your situation and help with brainstorming your options: 1800-RUNAWAY or through our live chat at www.1800runaway.org.

        Best of luck,

        NRS

    • #4
      Im seventeen and my mom has sent me to live with my dad twice already and constantly throughout my life told me she doesn’t want me to live with her since the age of 11. Now that I am getting closer to 18 she has been trying to send me to live with my dad again although he no longer has any legal authority of my siblings and I. I have been trying to move out on my own with my boyfriend whose family knows my situation and wants to help but my mom wont let me leave unless its with my dad. She is very mentally abusive and controlling to my sister and I and not my other three siblings. My relationship with my mother has been complex and she has always made it very clear to me she doesn’t want me around. She tells me she want me out of her house but will only allow me to leave unless its with my dad. I still have 8 months until my 18th birthday and the situation at home is only escalating and getting worse. I wanted to know if there is a loophole in which I can move out in California without getting the parents of my boyfriend into trouble.

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello there,
        Thanks for reaching out to NRS! We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. You mentioned experiencing emotional abuse which may be reportable against your mom. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.
        In regard to moving in with your boyfriend's parents we cannot really say if there are loopholes. We are not legal experts, but what we do know is the age of majority, or the age you are considered an adult, is 18. This means you would need legal guardian permission to live elsewhere or the the police could potentially get involved. If your legal guardian does not want you there they can press charges against whomever you stay with. At 17 it can be a gray area though. Sometimes the police are more lenient since you are so close to 18. You can always reach out to your local non emergency police department number and ask them directly how they would handle the situation.

        We hope this helps. Please reach out if we can offer any further support as we can only respond to forum posts twice. Our number is 800-RUNAWAY or you can use our live chat at www.1800runaway.org.
        Be safe,
        NRS
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