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Turning 18 soon and want to move out legally

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  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Reply:Hi,
    I turn 18 in July

    Hi there,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

    We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
    As of right now you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws. Okay.

    While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law like bank account access to funds, you might consider checking with a legal aid service. They may be able to better answer any legal questions.

    We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    Be safe,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hi,
    I turn 18 in July and really wanna move out of my moms house. But I’m scared she might do something crazy with the police. She constantly abuses me and puts me down. If I leave is there any way she can bring me back? Also we used to share a bank account but now she won’t give me money and I missed my deadline for my college deposit, I opened my own account now but she has over $1,000. Can I get that back? Please help I’m desperate

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod8
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there –

    Thank you so much for taking the time out of your day to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline and posting on our public forum. By helping you during your crisis, hopefully there are other youth that are in similar situations can read this for help as well.

    It sounds like your parents are no longer are supporting you and plan to kick you out of the house once you turn 18 years old. It’s great that you have thought ahead to secure a place to live once you are told to leave your parents’ house. It can be a little tricky at the age of 17, but there are some cases in which a police officer won't take a runaway report for someone that is 17. Especially if there are a little closer to turning 18 years old, along with having already graduated high school. This is not the case all the time of course, but it is something that we have heard of happening before. But something to keep in mind is that though a police officer doesn't take a report it doesn't make it legal for minors to leave home before turning 18. So since you are only about a week away from turning 18, they might not do much to bring you back home once you do leave.

    We hope that helps! Good luck and feel free to reach out to us in the future if you need us.

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    I live in Louisiana and I am turning 18 in a little over a week. My parents are kicking me out on my birthday. I already have a place where i can live. They have stopped buying me food and there is no food in the house. They will no let me take a hot shower, wash my cloths, or buy my shampoo or conditioner. Can I move out earlier? What can I do?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod16
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello, thank you for posting today! It sounds like things are really stressful living with your dad. He seems to say really hurtful things to and about you. We are glad you reached out for help. That shows a lot of strength!

    First, you did mention feeling like people would be happier if you were dead, but then said you know you would be missed. That is true! You would be missed by your family and friends. We care about your safety and well-being and we are here 24/7 for you. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is also 24/7 both by phone and online: 1-800-273-8255, suicidepreventionlifeline.org. There is also the Crisis Text Line available 24/7 by texting 741-741. Stay strong. It may seem really hard right now but there is help for you!
    It sounds like you are turning 18 next week. 18 is the legal age when one can move out in most states (except Alabama and Nebraska) so legally, you should not have an issue leaving once you are 18.

    If you are looking for shelters or transitional living programs, we have a database full, so if you reach out by online chat (4:30-11:30 pm Central time) or by phone (open 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929) we can look up some local resources for you!
    For low-income housing and rental assistance, you can look at HUD.gov. For emergency shelter while you are getting on your feet, www.homelessshelterdirectory.org can help you locate shelters near you.
    We are here 24/7 to listen and support you.

    Call us anytime or live chat us in the evenings: 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Best of luck in moving out and be sure to support yourself through this difficult time. We are here for you.

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hey my name is **** i´m gay and i came out to mom when i was little and she was okay with it and that all what matters and i came out to everyone eles but not my dad yet my mom told him when i was 14 i think and he didn´t like that but i didn´t care but after i came out he start saying things like fag or whatever when he was drunk .... and lets say he didnt alot of mean hurtful t things and well i wanna move out when i turn 18 my birthday is next week and i wanna move out of my family home i just can´t be around my dad anymore we fight over little things and i know he don´t like ****** i mean i can´t help it the way i am but he never liked me when i was a baby he always called me names until i started saying things back and he didn´t like that but i didn´t care and fist fought like 3 times kinda i´m just done with his ******** and i can say alot of more things about my dad but i don´t really wanna but alot more out there and now i just wanna go home anymore my mom has alot of things going on and i don´t wanna add more things and sometimes i think to myself if i killed myself everyone will be happy but really i will be missed i don´t wanna hurt anyone i don´t know what to do i really don´t like my dad .. what should i do

    can anyone help ??
    Last edited by ccsmod7; 03-09-2018, 11:47 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like living with your mom has been a difficult experience for you and it must be incredibly frustrating and hurtful to feel like your mom has always been against you. You mentioned that you’re planning to leave when you turn 18 and you’re making plans for what that will look like. That shows a lot of maturity and foresight. Everyone’s situation is different, but we can talk about the basics. You might want to consider where you will live first. This can be a family member, a college dorm, an apartment, or perhaps a transitional living program (TLP). A transitional living program is similar to a shelter but is more long term and helps you get adjusted to living a life on your own. We’re unsure where you live specifically, but if you give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 we can try to help you locate a TLP in your area. Another resource for you might be your financial aid office at the college you choose to attend. If you are able, it might be a good idea to set up an appointment (in person or by phone) with a financial aid counselor at your chosen college to talk about what your options are financially and look into the possibility of scholarships/grants/aid/etc. Before you go, it might be a good idea to save up some money for living expenses and emergencies, to prepare clothing appropriate for harsh weather, extra food, and your important documents (ID, social security, birth certificate, etc). Thanks again for writing in. It sounds like you’re really putting a lot of thought into your situation which is great. If you ever want to talk more specifically about your situation, please feel free to reach out to us 24/7. Best of luck.

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    I live in wv. I will be turning 18 in may and I was just asking for help and how to move out. What all should I prepare for? I live with my mother and stepfather and sister. My mother and I have never gotten along since I turned into a teen. She’s has always been against me with everything in my life. She has never given me a chance. She always puts me down and I just can’t deal with the negativity in my life. But I have no where to go as of right now. So I just need advance on what to get prepared Before I move out. I plan on going to college this coming fall. And it scares me to think I will be on my own while I go to college. I will be juggling a job(which I already have), college, and living on my own. It is very scary but I can’t stay here anymore.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    replied
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We are here 24/7 to listen and to support.

    It sounds like you have made up your mind about leaving but don't want to hurt your parent's feelings. We are not legal experts, but generally speaking once you turn 18 you would be able to leave your home and live somewhere else without legal consequences. If you give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could walk through some options with you about enrolling in school and other factors you might be considering. We could look up transitional housing in your area which not only provides housing but often offers employment training and other resources also or we can look up other options for you. Going to the doctor might depend on whether you would continue to use your parent's insurance or not. Do you think you'd be able to have a productive conversation with your parents about leaving? We have a conference call service here where a liner can mediate a conversation between you and your parents to make it more productive and where you could voice your opinions safely. Let us know if that is something you would be interested in.

    Good luck,

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hi um.. I'm turning 18 on the 27 of December and I want to move out with my friend. We have been talking about doing this for awhile and it's getting closer to where it's almost time. I'm really conflicted about this because I'm not sure how my parents are going to take this information. I've talked to them about this and every time it's feelt like they just want to hold me back. I feel if I go I won't be treated like a child anymore and I feel like I won't be treated like I'm not smart enough to do things. When I talked to my mom she just made me feel bad for thinking of leaving her to be with my friend and her mom and sister. My friend and I are both getting jobs and I still have to get my permit my mom isn't really helpful with this and I think my friend will be. I don't know my friends family much but I do see that they are nice. And mom made me feel bad when I talked to her about this and I started having doubts about going. And that made me get into a fight with my friend but we are fine now we resolve it. My friend said that everything is already made for me to be with them. And I just feel like going with them.

    I'd like any suggestions about if I should go or not.
    How will transfer schools
    And medical needs?
    ​​​​​​

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there.
    Thank you for reaching out to NRS. We are very sorry to hear about the tough situation that you are in. We know it can be very hard to seek help when you need it, so we applaud you for being brave enough to seek help when you need it.
    Again, we are very sorry to hear about the tough situation that you are in. We cannot imagine what you must be going through. You mentioned that you want to leave your parent’s house and live with someone else. Your parents are opposed to this idea because they do not know the person you want to move in with. You also mentioned they will not give this person a chance to talk to them. It is very good to see that you have some idea of what you will be doing if you leave. We think it is a great idea that you plan to finish high school even if you do leave your parent’s home. You want to know if they can file a runaway report if you leave. We are not legal experts here at NRS, but to our limited knowledge, we know that yes, your parents can file a runaway report if you leave their home without their permission. If and when they file this report, the police will have you in their system. The police will not go door to door looking for you. If you come into contact with the police, for breaking curfew, for example, they will run your name through their system and it will come up that there is a runaway report filed for you. If you do not come into contact with the police, you should have no trouble. Again, we are not legal experts but we have heard of cases where the responding police officer will not even bother to file a runaway report for a 17 year old. There have also been cases where the police officer will file the report because a youth is not yet 18. It is up to the discretion of the responding officer at times. Also, if there is any type of abuse going at home, the police will not take you back home and an abuse report will be filed. We hope that this information is helpful.
    Thank you for reaching out to NRS once again. We are sorry to know of the situation that you are in. We hope that the information we provided you with is helpful. If you would like to speak further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or start a live chat with us online. Remember, we are here to listen, we are here to help. We wish you the very best of luck and we hope that everything works out for you.

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hi,
    I want to leave my house but my parents are stopping me from going anywhere cause they don’t know the person but when I give them a chance to talk with him they go automatically to a no of not wanting to speak with him. I am 17 years old and will be 18 in March. I already have a place to stay at and also a school that I can finish my High school in Minnesota (I’m from Houston). Can they file a report if I end up leaving? I’m fed up done where I live and wanting to move out officially.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod7
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there, we're glad you reached out to us with this good question.

    We'll try to help. It sounds like you want to move out from your home. In Indiana the age of majority is 18, rather than 19. Meaning that 18 is the legal age you can leave home without permission.

    If you want to talk about your situation or anything else you might want to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24/7 and are confidential.

    Good luck

    -NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    My parents got custody of me in indiana 5 years ago. And said it was illegal to move out until im 19. Is this true?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,
    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you have some questions as to what rights you have in leaving home before the age of majority. We want you to know that we are not legal experts nor are we affiliated with the police so we can only speak generally about what could happen if a youth leaves home without the consent of a guardian. Leaving home without parental consent (running away) is not a crime, so the police will not arrest you. If you do leave home without permission your guardian does have the right to file a runaway report. Running away is not a crime it is a status offence (something that only a minor can get in trouble for: truancy, buying cigarettes, etc.) this means that if you have any interaction with the police they will simply return you home. On the other hand the people that you are found to be staying with could face legal consequences that vary depending on your state. You can find out more about how runaway’s reports are carried out by contacting your local police department. We say this because since you are so close to being 18 the police might not take an interest in looking for someone who is so close to being of age. If you would like we could contact your local non-emergency number for you or with you. Just give us a call and one of our trained liners would be happy to assist you. 1-800-786-2929
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