Turning 18 soon and want to move out legally

[Guest]

I’m 17 turning 18 on September 15.I can’t take it anymore with my mom. She’s emotionally abusive everyday,she always takes everything out on me not my older siblings(I am the youngest),and is going to take my door down.I can’t take it anymore.Please help.

[ccsmod6]

Hey there,

Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you're going through a really strsesful time with your mom, and we'll do our best to help.

Dealing with emotional abuse can be really stressful, especially if you're handling it on your own. When things get tough, it can be good to reach out to your support network and lean on family and friends. If you need someone to talk things out with or even if you just want to vent, you can always give us a call! We are 24/7 and ready to listen. You can reach us anytime at 1-800-786-2929. Counseling could also be helpful--if you're interested, we can help you look into any free or sliding-scale resources in your area. Just give us a call if you would like to discuss that further.

You mentioned that she's going to take your door down. That sounds like a really serious thing to do, since it will leave you with very little privacy. If you'd like, we do have a conference call service. You and your mom could call in, and we could moderate a conversation between you guys on her decision to take down your door and whether there might be a better solution. If you're interested in setting up a conference call, just give us a call at 1-800-786-2929.

Leaving home is a huge decision, since you'll need to be able to support yourself financially, emotionally, physically, etc. If you are sure that you are ready to move out, you could try giving your local police department a call on their non-emergency number to see what their policy is on taking runaway reports for 17 year olds. You are pretty close to turning 18, and assuming that is the age of majority in your state, the police might not actually take a runaway report for you. You can also try calling a youth shelter near you to see what their experience with 17 year old runaways has been.

Hopefully this helps. If you want to discuss any of this further or have any other questions, please don't hesitate to give us a call anytime at 1-800-786-2929.

Best of luck,
NRS

[Guest]

My fiancee is turning 18 in a matter of 3 months. She's being severely mentally abused, and we've gone to everyone for help. Social workers, a sheriff, high ranking government officials, and many other people .we're running out of options, as we live in the Commonwealth of Kentucky. Is there any information that can help her leave a little early? Maybe the police would let her stay with me, considering I have an apartment and we both have jobs? Any advice would be handy. I understand you're not legal experts, but we're out of options .

[ccsmod4]

Reply: My fiancee is turning 18

Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
It sounds like she has been to the police and child services for help but it sounds like she came away without any solution to her abusive situation. We don’t know what she may have been told would happen if she were to just leave and move out. Leaving would be her decision to make. Most states have laws against aiding or harboring a runaway sometimes it’s up to the police as to how they would pursue the situation. Seeing that she is so close to 18 they may not force her to go home if she feels at risk. We would be glad to explore some options of possible safe haven or runaway shelters with her.

We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If she is at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage for her to reach out to or seek emergency assistance immediately.


Take care,
NRS

[Guest]

I am currently 17 years old and I’ll be 18 in two months. I’m absolutely miserable in my home and I’ve tried killing myself a few times and my parents have said on multiple occasions that Dad wants to kick me out and mom says she can’t find reasons not to. So I want to stay with a friend until I can contact a family member who might take me in. Is this something I should do?

[ccsmod15]

Hello,

No one deserves to feel absolutely miserable in their own home. It sounds like you have been struggling with suicidal thoughts and actions and we’re glad you’re still here. Sometimes contacting the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or even calling us at 1-800-RUNAWAY when you’re struggling in the moment can be helpful.

We are not legal experts, but in most states, running away under the age of 18 constitutes a status offense, which means it is not illegal per se but could carry with it certain consequences. In particular, if your parents file a runaway report, then the police may be able to take you back home if they can find you. They also may be able to charge the person with whom you are staying with harboring a runaway, a potential misdemeanor. However, not all police departments accept these reports for 17-year-olds who are so close to legal age. It may be worth checking directly with your local police station as to how they handle those types of situations.

One option would be obtaining permission from your parents to live somewhere else. It is against the law for them to kick you out of their home without having an alternative living situation set up. This alternative living situation could be your friend or family member that you already have in mind.

Another option would be moving temporarily into a youth shelter, with the knowledge that the shelter would most likely contact your parents. Again, if you contact us by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY we can help you locate shelters and legal resources nearby. We can also talk about other ways you can make your current situation more bearable.

Best of luck,

National Runaway Safeline

[Guest]

Hi, my friend is turning 18 in a month and her house hold containing her family members and parents of course isn't so great, she is desperate to move out. When she turns 18 can she move out on her own without her parents consent? And If they call the cops on her for leaving home without their permission, will they make her go back to her parent's house?

[ccsmod9]

Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that you must be going through a difficult time for you. Our hope is to provide you with resources available to you.
From what we gather about your friend as long as she waits till she is 18 she can move out as soon as she turns 18. She can even call the cops to help escort her and her stuff out of her parent’s house. So no they cannot do anything to make her stay legally. She will have her full rights when she turns 18.
Again we want to thank you again for seeking us out. We hope that we have given you some answers to make a decision that is best for your friend. If you or your friend have more questions or concerns please feel free to call us at (1-800-786-2929) or online on our chat option at (www.1800runaway.org) Again we hope you can find a solution to your current situation.
Best Wishes- NRS

[Guest]

Hello, I'd like to remain anonymous as well. I am stuck on the laws of North Carolina for runaways. Let's say that I have just turned 16 and I would like to leave my parental's house. I have heard, 16 is the age of consent here in North Carolina and to become a legal adult at the age of 16, you would have to sign an emancipation for myself, but, I would not like my parentals to know.
My parentals are very strict and over-protective. They always try to check my phone, know who I'm talking to, know who I'm texting and accusing me of having attitudes at times when I am not. I don't want to give out too much information but, my parentals are both physically and emotionally abusive. There have been attempts to resolve these issues but the service where I'm from would just push it to the side, not bothering to look into it more because I am not 18 yet. Is there a way where I can leave my parental's house without filling out an emancipation, because my parentals would find out and I would not like them knowing about that or me posting this message. Can I leave without being filed of a 'runaway'.
My relationship with my parentals is that they always put me down when I try to be a good child. They easily get angry at everything I do, always thinking I have an attitude with them when I do not. They also threaten me, physically and emotionally abused me as I stated before and it has led me to despise them. Also, if I were to just leave at the age of consent (16) do I have to return back? Or will I just be left alone? If I were to decide to just up and go, would I be able to live/rent a place with for example, my biological father and my step-mother?
Thank you for your help.

[ccsmod6]

Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that your relationship with your parents has gotten to a point where you do not want to live at home anymore. It is unfair that they do not give you an adequate amount of privacy and that they are not supportive of your efforts to be a good child. It is inappropriate for your parents to act in a way that is abusive, physically or emotionally. If you would like to learn about the reporting process or make a report, please reach out to the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453.

While we are not legal experts, we do have general information about how running away is handled in the US. Unfortunately, the age of consent does not have much bearing on where you are allowed to live. Until you are legally an adult, 18, your parents do dictate where you have to reside. If you do run away as a minor, your guardians are entitled to file a runaway report. If you encounter the police with a runaway report out on you, you will most likely not be arrested. Most of the times, the guardians are notified and the runaway is simply taken home. If you have not already, it may be a good idea to reach out to your biological father and talk about the possibility of transferring custody from your current parents to him. If your parents are not happy with the current situation either, they may be open to allowing you to live with your biological father. There may be other options and if you would like to talk more about your situation, please reach out to us on our 24/7 hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY or on chat at 1800runaway.org.

[Guest]

Hello, I'd like to remain anonymous as well. I am stuck on the laws of North Carolina for runaways. Let's say that I have just turned 16 and I would like to leave my parental's house. I have heard, 16 is the age of consent here in North Carolina and to become a legal adult at the age of 16, you would have to sign an emancipation for myself, but, I would not like my parentals to know.
My parentals are very strict and over-protective. They always try to check my phone, know who I'm talking to, know who I'm texting and accusing me of having attitudes at times when I am not. I don't want to give out too much information but, my parentals are both physically and emotionally abusive. There have been attempts to resolve these issues but the service where I'm from would just push it to the side, not bothering to look into it more because I am not 18 yet. Is there a way where I can leave my parental's house without filling out an emancipation, because my parentals would find out and I would not like them knowing about that or me posting this message. Can I leave without being filed of a 'runaway'.
My relationship with my parentals is that they always put me down when I try to be a good child. They easily get angry at everything I do, always thinking I have an attitude with them when I do not. They also threaten me, physically and emotionally abused me as I stated before and it has led me to despise them. Also, if I were to just leave at the age of consent (16) do I have to return back? Or will I just be left alone? If I were to decide to just up and go, would I be able to live/rent a place with for example, my biological father and my step-mother?
Thank you for your help.

[Guest]

I'm in Alabama and currently 17 but I'm turning 18 in a month I was kicked out of my parents house and then filled a runaway report but I don't want to go back can I legally move out

[ccsmod1]

Hey there,

Thanks so much for reaching out to us and sharing a little bit about what's going on. We aren't legal experts here at NRS, but the age of majority (adulthood) in Alabama is 19, which means that you are considered a minor until then. As you are a minor your parents have a legal obligation to provide you with necessities, including shelter. Failure to do this (kicking you out) can be considered child neglect, which is illegal. If you'd like, you have the option to file a report based on this neglectful/abusive action. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It may also be a good idea to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

All the best,
NRS

[Guest]

I'm 17 and pregnant my moms trying to make me get an abortion and i have 4 months till im 18 can i move out

[ccsmod4]

Reply: I'm 17 and pregnant


Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. In some cases where the minor is close to becoming 18 the police may not take a runaway report or may not force the minor to return home if the deem they are not at risk. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions. You have the right to choose what you want to do with your pregnancy. For more information on your rights you might look online for legal aid services in your area.

We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail and explore options, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hey there, I'm Cedric and I live in Gaithersburg, Well first I don't have a car or license and I'm still staying in this school at the age of 21. Before, moving out. But, my parents said I can't due to my sickness. So, I was wandering when will I be able to move out on that day is there any reasons? After all, my mom said that I'm not sick no more, but still have to stay in the house for quite a while.

[ccsmod1]

Hey Cedric,

Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what's been going on, we know it takes a lot of courage. It makes sense that you want to move out and have the independence that others your age enjoy, it must be frustrating to hear that your mother wants you to stay. We aren't legal experts here at NRS, but generally speaking, once you are 18 you are considered an adult and can live where you please. You previously mentioned that you were previously sick and it prevented you from leaving home. It may be a good idea to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage to go into more depth about the situation and explore options that you may have available to you. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

Stay safe,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi, I’m turning 18 in 2 days and want to leave home

[ccsmod7]

Hi there thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are in a difficult situation wanting to leave your mom's place 2 days before you become a legal adult.

We are not legal experts but we can answer your question generally. It's typically up to local police with how they address 17 year old runaway situations, especially when you only have 2 days to go. They could decline to take a report for you, or they could take a report and not actively look for you. You might try to reach out to your local non-emergency number to see if they would take a runaway report for you with 2 days to go.

If you’d like additional support or resources please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY 24 hours, 7 days a week or chat with us online by going to www.1800RUNAWAY.org.

[Guest]

I’m turning 18 in 2 days and want to leave the state as soon as I turn 18. I’ve done a lot of wrong in my life and I hurt the people I care about, I think a new start would be just what I need but don’t know exactly how to make that step. I don’t have money, I don’t have a car, I have nothing going for me and I need to leave. I feel alone in this world and when I try to regain connection I feel as if I don’t deserve it. Maybe it’s just the memories that i have at home or maybe it’s just me constantly judging myself. I don’t want to hurt anybody I care about anymore, I’d just be a burden. If you guys can help me in any way it would be very helpful

[ccsmod7]

Hi there thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you are in a difficult situation wanting to leave your mom's place 2 days before you become a legal adult.

It sounds like you are feeling really alone and like you don't want to hurt folks. You seem like a good person. You are not your past mistakes, rather you are what you learn from them and how you adjust moving forward. You are worthy of love and acceptance. If you have hurt people, you might try to let them know how you are feeling so sorry and you are wanting to make things right. You could ask them if there is anything they need or anything you could do for them.

We are not legal experts but we can answer your question generally. It's typically up to local police with how they address 17 year old runaway situations, especially when you only have 2 days to go. They could decline to take a report for you, or they could take a report and not actively look for you. You might try to reach out to your local non-emergency number to see if they would take a runaway report for you with 2 days to go.

If you do decide to leave, you might try to make a plan for where you would go and how you will survive. If you contact us, we can look for local shelters and transitional living programs in your area.

If you’d like additional support or resources please call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY 24 hours, 7 days a week or chat with us online by going to www.1800RUNAWAY.org.

[Guest]

In state of ky...can u move out of guardians home if in highschoool..and 3 weeks till turn 18

[ccsmod9]

Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS

[Guest]

I’m 16 and I’m most likely gonna be a father in 9 months and I don’t know if my mom will let me see my child and my parents don’t know yet and her parents suspect that she is pregnant and is my mom allowed to take my phone and if she try’s to stop me from seeing my child can I leave the house without my parents knowing legally

[ccsmod2]

Hello There,
Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a difficult situation. You could consider having her take a pregnancy test to find out if she is pregnant or not. Once you find out it may be easier to explore options. One option you could consider is talking with your mother and the girl’s family and letting them know you would want to be in your child’s life. At NRS we offer conference calling where we can help mediate that conversation if you call us we can call out to your mom. Conference calling allows you to be heard and we are there to mediate the conversation and provide support to you.
We are not legal experts but we do have some information on the laws. From our understanding if your mother bought your phone she would be allowed to take your phone. Also if you left home without permission she does have the right to file a runaway report. If the police did find you they would most likely bring you back home. You could contact your local police or local court house and see what right you would have in seeing your child. You can contact us if you need legal aid resources or if you need resources for pregnancy.
We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. Best of luck!
NRS