Age:17. Location: Colton Ca I'm either living with my mom, or I'm running away.

[Unregistered]

I'm in a huge dilemma at the moment. My dad has just restricted me from visiting my mother until I'm 18, because I snuck out to hang out with friends (he's punishing her for my idiotic decision.) and she is currently in bad health and I cannot sit and let what might be my last months with my mom slip away. So I had a few question as far as my living situation.

I have a good home environment with my dad, apart from the lack of freedom I'm given, which isn't here not there. But I'd much rather live with my mom, because I have a more personal relationship with her, and I feel like I can be more open and honest with situations in my life.

If I were to go to my moms with out my dad's consent (given that my dad supposedly has full custody) would he have the right by law to bring me home or file me as a runaway, even though I'm with my blood mother who is capable of providing for me?

If I'm unable to live with my mother, and my dad continues to suppress my right to see my own mother, I plan to runaway to Colorado to live with a close friend of mine who is 23. If he were to harbor me, would either of us be arrested, either for running away or harboring? I live in Colton ca and he lives in Denver co.

Thank you in advance.

[ccsmod1]

RE: I'm either living with my mom, or I'm running away.

Hello,

Thank you for reaching out to us for help. It sounds like you are in a very difficult situation. It is understandable that you would want to live with your mother. If you go to stay with her without your father’s permission, he could report you to the police as a runaway since he has full custody. It is not a crime to run away from home. It is a “status offence,” which means that if you run away, the police can make you go home, but you will not be charged with a crime. However, since you are 17 and you want to live with your mother, the police might decide not to force you to go home. In some cases youth your age have a say in which parent they want to live with. How do you think your father would react? Do you think he would call the police, get a lawyer, try to get a court order, or fight to get you back home against your wishes? How your legal guardian reacts can have a great impact on the outcome. Is there a way that you can talk to him about how you feel and convince him to let you see your mother since she is sick? Trying to work things out with your dad might be an option that we can help you with. You also said you might run away across state lines to live with your friend. Running across state lines comes with added risks. Also, if you move in with your friend, it is a possibility that your friend could be charged with harboring a runaway.

There are lots of things to think about before you run away, so we are really glad that you contacted us. If you want somebody to talk to about all of this, please don’t hesitate to give us a call 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. All of our services are anonymous and confidential. You can also reach us through our live chat service at www.1800RUNAWAY.org every day between 4:30pm and 11:30pm Central time. We can answer any questions you might have, help you develop a plan, and provide any resources that you might need. We could even do a conference call with your father if you think that it would help. We understand that you must be having a really hard time right now, and we are looking forward to talking to you soon.

Best of luck,

NRS

[Unregistered]

Say my dad were to be resistant to me moving in with my mom? What are my options at that point? I feel the overwhelming need to be there for both my mother and my young sister (4 years old.) I can't sit by and know she's going through that without my constant support.

[ccsmod1]

RE: I'm either living with my mom, or I'm running away.

Hey,

Thanks for getting back to us. We can understand why you want to go to your mom. It sounds like a very tense situation at home with your father. It might be easier for us to help you figure out what options you have at this point if you called us or if you contact us during the hours of chat. That way we can ask questions back and forth and figure out what options and resources will work the best. Ultimately, the decision to run away to be with your mom against your father's wishes will be up to you entirely. We can help you figure out what your best options are over the phone or by chat. Our 24/7 confidential hotline is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are looking forward to hearing from you so that we can help you work this out.

NRS