Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

I'm 17 and I can't stand living in this house anymore!

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #46
    I'm a 17 year old guy about to turn 18 in September. I talked to a family member and they said they could probably take me in. I'm tired of getting yelled at and always threaten by my grandad. He's always yelling at me and expects me to do EVERY single thing and never to hang out with friends! He said this is a push summer and that I'd better get used to it because the farm is over everything and that I'm not gonna have time to much of anything. I'm always working never have free time and there are things that I'm not even suppose to do but he's making me. I'm so tired of it and I just want to be out of this house/ off the farm all summer. He always complains when someone wants me to help them and then complains about me not having a social life or not be social. I don't know what to do, so that why I turned to you maybe you know of something I could do or someone I could tell this stuff.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for writing to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like a lot has been going on and things have been really overwhelming for you. It takes a lot of courage to reach out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out to us explore your options.
      We are sorry to hear that things are so stressful at home. It is great to see that a family member is willing to let you stay with them. While we are not legal experts but just speaking general if you are to leave home without your parents’ permission the police can bring you back home and whoever you are staying with could be charged with harboring a runaway. However, since you are 17 actual laws can vary and can be a little more lenient. You could call the non-emergency number of your local police department to confirm what the actual law in your area is. Leaving home can be hard in many cases. You might want to think about how you might pay for food or other living expenses and how long your family member might be ok with you staying there for.
      This is a hard time and we are here to support you through this. If you would like you could reach out to us by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or live chat with us and we would be happy to listen to you and explore your options. We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon.
      Best,
      NRS

  • #47
    I’m 17 going on 18 in 6 weeks. All my life my mom has been so controlling and just not a good mom. She got our whole family kicked out of our home and now me my dad and mom share a 2 bedroom 1 bathroom and I have to share a room with my dad even though I’m a female. My mom and dad argue everyday and I argue with my mom too. Everyday I step inside the house from school she’s yelling at me telling me to clean something up. She’s always cussing at me and it makes me cry and then she calls me a crybaby and I’ve just had enough of her sh**. I’m planning on moving out with my brother next semester when I’m 18 and going back to my other school. And I don’t ever want to talk to my mom again until she gets well because she’s mentally unstable. However because I still have school my parents think I can’t move out. I’ve only asked my parents if I can go back to my other school and they said no. But I never shared with them my plan to move out after the semester. I feel like this move with be very unexpected for them and create even more problems. What do I do?

    Comment


    • ccsmod6
      ccsmod6 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like things are really tough at home right now. You don’t deserve to be yelled at and treated poorly. You deserve to feel safe and comfortable at home. It sounds like your brother is someone that is a good support in your life. It can be helpful to talk with other people that are supportive like a teacher, school counselor, or other trustworthy adult as well as friends.
      It’s also really good that you are planning on making sure your education doesn’t suffer because of what is going on at home. We aren’t legal experts and it sounds like you are concerned about being able to enroll in your old school and move out. You may want to reach out to your local school district and police department and ask about moving out while still in school and whether you can enroll on your own.
      Some other things to think about if you plan to move out are how you and your brother would support your selves financially to be able to get housing, food, and other necessities. It sounds like you care for your parents and want your mom to get some help. It may help to talk to someone that your mom will listen to and see if they can help try to get your mom to seek help or maybe someone who can talk to your dad. Also, we offer a conference calling service and could mediate a conversation between you and your dad or mom and help keep things calm and productive. Also, you do have the right to file an abuse report about how your mom has been treating you the child abuse hotline is Child Help 800.422.4453 and if you want we can call with you if you do want to call and make a report.
      Thank you again for reaching out. We would be happy to further discuss your options if you want to give us a call or get in touch with us on chat. We are here for you 24/7, please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need us. We wish you the best of luck.

  • #48
    Hi hi there I am having some trouble with my adopted parents and I dont wantknow to stay here anymore they keeping me away from.my family and my girlfriend 17 and im.not allowed to go.anywere I am a soft guy ppl say im gay bec I.have a soft heart but it got so.bad I.cry.most of.the.times and I.just wana run away just to see my gf for a little while she has been.through alot lately and I.wanaI be there but they say I can be there for her over a phone but I cant .imust eb with her I honestly.dunno.what to.do.i just need some advice .

    Comment


    • ccsmod5
      ccsmod5 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi,

      Thank you so much for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that sharing your struggles can be intimidating so we appreciate your willingness to ask for help! It sounds like you’re in a really difficult place right now. Your girlfriend seems to be going through a lot and you want to be there for her, but your parents aren’t letting you go to her. You’re having a lot of overwhelming feelings in a society that’s not supportive of them. It’s important and admirable how important being there for your girlfriend is, but it seems like you’re also dealing with a lot and would like some help. So let’s talk about that.

      You mentioned that you’re having some difficulty with your adoptive parents. We understand why you may not want to discuss any more details on that situation on a public forum but if you decide you want to talk to someone about specifics, we have a 24/7, confidential hotline at 18007862929. We also have a confidential online messaging service after 4:30 on www.1800runaway.org. More specifics could help us discuss more specific options you have, but we still have some to explore.
      If you’re interested and comfortable, emancipation or other legal services about guardianship are possibilities to explore. We’re not legal experts so we can’t provide you with help if you choose to go down this route, but with some information on your location we can provide you with referrals to local legal services and general information. Another possibility about leaving home is running away. This can be a scary decision to make, and we would love to help talk you through it, although ultimately only you know what you feel comfortable with. When deciding whether or not to runaway it’s important to form a plan. This includes making you sure you have a place to stay, a way to support yourself, and even access to health care. If you don’t feel comfortable with these options, that’s alright. Leaving home may not be the option you feel comfortable with but hopefully we can try to make home more comfortable. Talking to your parents about how you feel about your home may help with communication and potentially create a change. If you want to discuss any of these possibilities further please give us a call!

      You also spoke about the difficulties your girlfriend is going through. If, unfortunately, you’re not able to provide her with the help you’d like to give her, maybe because of your parents or other obstacles, there are many hotlines that can be searched for online. Some of the most used ones are the National Suicide Prevention Hotline (18002738255), The Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network (18006564673), and the National Eating Disorders Association (18009312237). You can also give her our number if you’re comfortable.
      It’s also important to take care of yourself. Talking to a school counselor or trusted adult, or friends who you feel comfortable sharing these things with could beneficial for you in feeling supported during this stressful time. Feel free to reach out to us further to discuss anything you’re feeling or any of the options we discussed. We really appreciate you taking the time to reach out to us and we hope we were able to provide you with some help!
      NRS

  • #49
    I’m 17th and my parent keep telling me if I turned as soon as 18 they’ll kick me out. And I’m tired to listen to what they say. They never talk positive about me even I do work as much as I can. Sometime when I get sick and don’t do anything they say that I’m jest action up because I lazy to work. So I don’t want to do anymore. I go to school but don’t have any intresting in school by thinking about my parent want to throw me out as soon as I’m 18. They say I’m wasted, I’m useless.....

    Comment


    • ccsmod16
      ccsmod16 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,

      Thank you for reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry that you’re going through that with your parents. Everyone needs support, including emotional support.

      One thing that can help with these situations is a support network. Think if you have people you can vent to about what you are going through. That can be other relatives, friends, or other trustworthy adults. It can sometimes ease the tension just to have someone to talk with.

      Another thing to think about is whether your parents realize how they are affecting you. You know your situation best, so this might not apply, but sometimes these difficulties can be miscommunications that can be worked out by communicating better.

      So, it might make sense to try to tell them what you need from them. And it might help to pick a time during the week when they are less stressed, and might be more open to what you have to say. It also might help for you to think about what you need from them specifically, and to define negative things they do and how they affect you. Sometimes writing out a list, so you are clear about what you want to say, can help too.

      It also might make sense to reflect on what you want. Think about what your life at 18 would look like, ideally. This transition to adulthood can be intimidating, and plenty of youth can get psyched out by it. By defining what you want, you might be able to figure out what specific next steps you want to take, and that might help you negotiate all these pressures. Even if you aren’t sure, it can help to start thinking about it.

      We hope these ideas help you with this tough situation that you’re in.

  • #50
    i cant live here anymore. my sister made me break up with my boyfriend and lied and said he’s a rapist and made all of his friends turn against him. she’s 19 and still living at home. she comes home drunk every night and when my mom was out of town last weekend i came home to get something and saw that her abusive ex who she got a restraining order against was cuddled up with her inside. she beat down my door and broke it. my mom and my little sisters are all on her side. todzay we got in a fight at the table and my little sisters cried. i wish she would move out but she’s not. I’m 17 and a sophmore in highschool. i have a 4.08 gpa and i have very big plans for my future. i feel like being in this enviroment is prohibiting me from being happy and reaching my goals. i dont know what to do

    Comment


    • ccsmod5
      ccsmod5 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hey,
      Thanks so much for reaching out. You sound like an intelligent, mature young person and we’re glad that you have big plans for yourself. It sounds like things at home are really tense with your sister and you feel that your home environment is getting in the way of your happiness. That’s completely understandable. We aren’t legal experts, but generally speaking if you are under 18 you need parental consent to leave home. If you think your mom would be open to letting you stay elsewhere, you might consider asking her for permission to stay with a friend or another family member. If you leave without permission, your mom would have the right to file a runaway report and if the police are able to locate you they may return you home. That being said, sometimes police choose not to pursue 17-year-old runaways. Police policies vary from station to station, so you might want to call your local non-emergency police number to ask how they might handle your situation.
      Whatever your decision, we encourage you to take care of your well-being as much as you can, whether that’s talking to friends, reading, journaling, making art, or confiding in adults you trust.
      Thank you again for reaching out. We hope this was helpful and we encourage you to reach out by phone if you need additional resources or need help figuring out your options. Our number is 1-800-786-2929 and our lines are always open. If you have a moment, we'd appreciate your feedback of our crisis services at the following link:
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think
      Stay safe!

  • #51
    Im 17 as most teenagers on here are saying, guess im nothing special here. As you can tell i want to run get away from my family but i have a few months until i turn 18. I live with my mother and my father lives far off but i cant stand him either. My problem with my mother is that she is so touchy on money and she gets all in my business sure that sounds like a typical mother but i was out with a friend and we went to walmart late that night but i forgot my phone in the car, (no big deal, its late and people should be asleep, nothing to worry about) when i get back to the car i look at my phone and find my mother called me 79 times and called the cops on me! I wasnt gone any longer than an hour at 1in the morning. I am not tracked my gps or anything but she should have known i was out with a friend or staying at a friends house. Calling the cops on me was too much.
    She complains about how i am going out too much when a few weeks ago she was the one saying i should go on dates more! She has money problems and blames it on me when i dont ask for much, i go somewhere and she asks for every detail, she is like a paranoid obsessive woman who has nothing better to do than harass me. I cant stay with a friend without her asking what im doing every other hour. Im not exaggerating either! I want to move out to a friends house who may take me in but i wont have a way of transportation after that and i would not know where to keep my clothes and computer for my online classes. I thought of getting a job like i did my junior year, (i had to get a job because my mother got in an accident and got paid less because her leg was injured) but this year i have too much classes and out of school curriculars. I need to get away from her, she stresses me out. My friends know how crazy she is too and its not from any sort of drug either, she is naturally obsessive. If there is anything i can do, please tell me

    Comment


    • #52
      Hi there,

      Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear about all that has been going on at home. It sounds like you are have been in a difficult situation for a long time and need independence.

      We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that because you are a minor, if you leave home and your mom files a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a run away. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like having a conference call with a liner and your mom, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Another thing you could try would be to reach out to your local police to inquire how they handle runaway reports for 17 year olds. Some cities and departments treat them differently because a 17 year old is so close to becoming a legal adult. The way to get the most accurate information would be to call your local police non-emergency number and anonymously inquire about their practices. If you need help finding this number or you want to walk through any of the options listed above with a liner, don't hesitate to give us a call.

      Good luck,

      NRS


      Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

      National Runaway Safeline
      [email protected] (Crisis Email)
      1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

      Tell us what you think about your experience!
      https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

      Comment


      • #53
        I there i Don't wanna live with my parents/family anymore because i be causing trouble i been depressed lately but i out of it i been running away i bei been threatened to be abuse with violence by one of my family members i moved with my dad i didont want to live with my father either i don't want to live with anyone from my family
        and i have a question for u like what is this for what do it do

        Comment


        • ccsmod16
          ccsmod16 commented
          Editing a comment
          Hello there, thanks so much for reaching out! It sounds like your living situation is incredibly hard and stressful! You do not deserve to be treated so poorly and we are here to help!
          We know you mentioned you are in danger of being abused by family. That must be so hurtful!! If you feel this is abuse, you do have a right to report it and learn more about other options like living with someone else. Child Help can help with these types of questions: 1-800-422-4453, childhelp.org.
          We can also conference call with you to make a report if you want. Call us anytime at 1-800-786-2929.
          As far as running away, to leave home legally, in most states you have to be 18 and if you leave before that, your parents could file a runaway report with police and if they find you, they usually take you back home. If you left and were found by police and you disclosed any type of abuse to them, they likely would contact child protective services.
          We are here to talk about options, support you and give resources in your area. We are here to support you 24/7: call us anytime at 1-800-786-2929 or on live chat when it is available in the afternoons and evenings. We are here to help you! Best of luck! Call or reach out again anytime!

      • #54
        Hi Um.. I really don't know if this is important or not but basically me and my mom have bee fighting for a few weeks now and everything I say turns into an argument even though I don't want it to and I always try to deescalate the situation but it somehow ends up worse to the point she looks at me and calls me trash and wishes I was never born. She also doesn't trust me... She never really has but I'm not bad I get decent grades I don't drink or do drugs but yet I can't go out with friends with the automatic assumption that if it's a guy he's my boyfriend (I'm not allowed to date) or if it's a girl she's taking me to my boyfriend I hate the way she talks to me and the mistrust I just feel so trapped and like I have no say over my own life and I hate it. I also have some issues. I tried committing suicide for the first time when I was in 2nd grade I felt like I was trash and no one loved me which is a stupid reason to want to die I guess but it was my reason. Also around that time I was getting molested by my family member which I guess added on to that and if I'm being honest I still feel that way like I'm all alone today and kinda feel like dying (wow that took a turn) idk I'm just tired of fighting and letting her determine my happiness I don't want to always be angry and upset and sad I just want to leave and be happy but I really can't leave (I'm 17 btw) can you help me with a plan even with the jumbled mess I just wrote
        ​​

        Comment


        • #55
          Hi there,

          Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about all that you have faced and want you to know that your life is valuable and you deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. If you ever need someone to talk to, at any time, you can reach out to both the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or to the Rape Abuse and Incest National Network at 1-800-656-4673. They are there to support and listen while also offering resources that you might want. Don't hesitate to give them a call.

          We are not legal experts, but we can tell you that because you are a minor, if you leave home and your mom files a runaway report, you could be returned home. There could also be legal consequences for whomever you stay with for what is called harboring a runaway. If you want a liner to help you walk through other options like us mediating a conference call between you and your mom, thinking through possible adults that you could turn to or could advocate for you, or things like emancipation and legal aid numbers, don't hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). One other thing you can do is reach out to your local police to inquire how they handle runaway reports for 17 year olds. Some cities and departments treat them differently because a 17 year old is so close to becoming a legal adult. The way to get the most accurate information would be to call your local police non-emergency number and anonymously inquire about their practices. Give us a call if you need help finding that number.

          Stay safe,

          NRS
          Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

          National Runaway Safeline
          [email protected] (Crisis Email)
          1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

          Tell us what you think about your experience!
          https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

          Comment


          • #56
            I have a situation going on someone help please!

            I’m 17 and my mum has said I am not living at the house anymore and told me to leave. I am at a friends house only for a week then I must leave, I need to get some housing sorted such as a apartment of something but I don’t know where or how to go about this situation. I have a lot going on already at the moment such as full time college, mental health issues and no job so I have no money either all I get is a college bursary which is obviously used for me to travel to college and eat at college. I literally have no idea what to do right now and I’m on a time limit by next week I have nowhere to stay at all. I really don’t know how to go about this and it’s affecting how I am at college and my mental health too

            Comment


            • ccsmod9
              ccsmod9 commented
              Editing a comment
              We want to thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that often times life gets hard and it is even harder to seek help and support. However we hope that we can listen and help in any way we can.
              From what we gather about your situation money is tough right now and it is hard to be on a time crunch. There are a couple options you could do. One is that you find a shelter near your area that might house you for a while or the second option being that you find whats called a transitional housing program. These programs help you find a job and provide you with a place to live so that you can focus on finding a job. Because our databases work in correlation to city and state we suggest you give us a call or go online and use our chat option to find out more specific information to your situation. If not you can also use the Homeless Shelter Directory (www.homelessshelterdirectory.org) to find shelters in your area.
              Again we want to thank you for reaching out to us. We know that it took a lot for you to reach out and we want you to know we value your story and all that you’ve been through. We hope that you can find a solution to your current situation. If you do happen to have more questions or concerns please do not hesitate to call us at (1-800-786-2929) or online at (www.1800runaway.org ) on our chat option.
              Best Wishes-NRS

          • #57
            Hi there,

            Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about your situation and can understand that it can be really stressful and scary to not have a home. If you give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 we would be able to look up resources for you like shelters or transitional living programs (TLP). TLP's provide housing but often also provide other services like counseling and employment help. To help you the best, we would need to know your gender and city/state, so don't hesitate to give us a call for those. We also might be able to walk through other options with you, like identifying the people in your life that could help or looking at other programs that could be more suited to your situation.

            Let us know how we can best help,

            NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • #58
              Im 17 an i dont wanna live with my family anymore how do i tell them

              Comment


              • ccsmod2
                ccsmod2 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hello There,

                Thank you for reaching out to The national Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and we are here to listen. We are not legal experts but in most states the legal age to leave home is 18 years old. Because you are still considered a minor if you left home, you could be considered as a runaway. Running awy is not a criminal offense it is a legal offense. What that means is that if the police found you they would most likely bring you back home. You could try getting permission to stay at a relative house or a friend’s house. We know having these conversations can sometimes be difficult. At NRS we offer conference calling where if you call us we can call out to your parents and help support you in having these conversations. We hope this information was useful in your situation, if you have any other questions or would like to discuss more please feel free to give us a call we are available 24/7. We wish you the best of luck!
                NRS

            • #59
              If I'm two weeks being 18. Is there away that I can leave home and stay on my own

              Comment


              • ccsmod10
                ccsmod10 commented
                Editing a comment
                Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. Often individuals contact us asking a similar question when they are so close the reaching the age of majority. In most states that age is 18 but there are some states where it is higher. You may want to look up your state on like to double check if it is indeed 18. You can reach out to your local NON-emergency police department and ask what that age is for your state.

                You have asked if there is a way to leave home and stay on your own. Once you reach the age of majority in your state you are allowed to live wherever you please without parentally permission. You bring up the addition question of also staying on your own. Once you are an adult the other major issue would be the financial situation or job to support independent living. Having a job and/or enough finances would be a large factor.

                Again, we are really glad that you reached out to us. It takes a lot to ask for help when you are trying to figure out your options. If you would like to talk further about your situation, please do not hesitate to call or chat with us. We are here to listen, here to help 24/7, call 1800RUNAWAY or on the internet at www.1800runaway.org

            • #60
              I want to move out I love with my grandma and my dad my mom is a drug head and abandoned me she Dosent care about me my grandma is getting old my dad Dosent care about me he puts me down all the time yells at me saying he wants to punch my head in the ground then my grandma yells at him to stop and he says I don’t care if I go to jail he puts me down and says I’m going to be a lowlife just like my momma is he never works we are always broke we never have gas money we pay the bills by the skin of our teeth and it’s his fault he never wants to work to support us Christmas is coming up and he hasent even worked we’re not even putting a tree up this year he gets aggervated I’m not even going to have a Christmas in in 9th grade I’m a freshman and I’m slowly giving up on life I’m tired of him he is just like my mom I just want to run away and never come back here but also I don’t want to get introuble I’m tired of this life I’m tired of being called I’m a peice of ******** and he just puts me down all the time he’s just like my mom I just want to run away god help me

              Comment


              • ccsmod1
                ccsmod1 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hey there,

                Thank you for reaching out, it takes a lot of courage to reach out for help and making that first step show us you are a very strong individual. You do not deserve to be treated so unfairly by your parents and it seems like you have already gone through so much.

                Since you are still considered a minor, being in the 9th grade, if you choose to run away, you would not legally get in trouble but your parents/legal guardian do have a right to file a missing child report. If they decide to make that choice, the police may or may not actively search for you but if they find you at a friend’s or family member’s place without your parent/legal guardian’s permission, there is a possibility that they will detain you until your parent/legal guardian picks you up as well as it puts your friend or family member at risk of being fined or it being a misdemeanor for harboring a runaway.

                Christmas time is supposed to be a time of happiness and it is unfair that your father is making you feel this way before the holidays. We are glad that you do have someone like you grandmother trying to advocate for you, although I see how it must be frustrating with her getting older. If you do ever feel unsafe, for whatever reason, you can text 44357 the words SAFE & [your location] and they will reply with the nearest safe place and their information for you to contact them.

                If you want to talk more in depth about what is going on at home, we are able to provide some resources you may be interested in, so do not hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or send us a chat at www.1800runaway.org, we are 24/7, toll free, and completely confidential. We are here for you and here to support you.

                -NRS
            Previously entered content was automatically saved. Restore or Discard.
            Auto-Saved
            x
            Insert: Thumbnail Small Medium Large Fullsize Remove  
            x
            x
            Working...
            X