Announcement

**ccsmod2** · 01-30-2008, 08:13 AM

Re: being withheld...

Thanks for contacting us here at NRS. We are sorry to hear of the stress and feelings of depression you are having for being stuck in the house. It is not fair for you to have to be in the house so much. It is also not fair for you not to be able to have a job and earn some money or have the decision of going to school for your senior year of high school. Fact is that once you turn 18, you are not considered a minor anymore. If you did decide to leave home, your parents could not report you as a runaway and you will not be made to return back home. In your case, I guess the question is how would you be able to survive on your own. If you become "homeless" of course there are shelters that you could go to but they may not be so long term. There are some transitional living programs that we may be able to look into as an option for you if we know your specific location. What is it that was going on that initially made you leave the first time? Had that been your first time leaving? How did you and your parents diffuse that situation? Did you all ever try any counseling or anything? Well, we are definitely willing to help you and talk to you about your options. You can call us here at 1-800-RUNAWAY at any time or you can post another bulletin message and we will respond to you. Good luck with things until we hear from you again!

**Guest** · 02-01-2008, 03:02 AM

Re: being withheld...

I initially ran away, not as a spur of the moment decision, but as something that I have been thinking about since my freshmen year in school. I deal with alot with my parents, my mom in particular. My mom has been diaganosed with Bi-Polar disorder, and sometimes she doesn't take her medicine, or she forgets, and other times, when she does take her medicine she drinks alcohol with it. My dad typically tries to stay away from her when she does this because she just goes insane. She starts acting impulsively. She wants to impulsively shop, or she'll try to drive while she is like this. Her speach patterns are very slurish, she cannot walk properly, and she most definantly cannot perform adequately while driving a vehicle.
And this is a reoccuring problem. She has been in and out of mental hospitals for this, and it just doesn't seem to work. Of course it does work for a while but she always goes right back to the same old stuff.
But when she acts like this, I find myself having to be her, well, babysitter. I have to watch over her, and if she is trying to do something that I won't let her do, she calls me a ********** and she hits me. My dad trys to say out of it, because if he helps me then she just attacts him as well.
When she is like this, she calls me fat and she calls me a whore. One time when she went into a mental hospital to get her straightened out the day that she came back she looked at me and asked me, "How much do you weigh?" I told her, "Um I think like 110." and she said, "Yeah.. You do look like you gained a couple pounds." Im tired of this treatment. It is not fair. Yes, I love my mom she gave birth to me and brought me into this world, but I just don't want to live with this any longer. That is why I ran away in the beggining.
And when I was a "runaway" I never went home. I would never have considered that an option. The only reason why I am here now is because the cops found me and arrested me and then made me come home. I had never ran away before but I had thought about it many times. In fact the night that I ran away I had already had everything packed that I needed and it was probably packed for about a month or something before I left.
I was actually in counseling when I ran away. And I am in counseling again now. Im not sure if it is doing much good, it's not doing any bad, but I don't know. I don't think my main concern is talking about my feelings. I do that all the time, I don't have a problem communicating my feelings. What I need is someone to help me learn how to get out of here. Even when I'm 18. How am I susposed to get out of here without a car, a phone, money, anything? I just wish that i knew of some options.
Im from Pueblo, Colorado if that is the specific location that you were looking for.

**ccsmod0** · 02-01-2008, 04:56 AM

Re: being withheld...

Thank you for contacting us here at NRS and hope to we can provide you with resources. We are sorry to hear about you mom calling you names. That doesn’t feel good when a love one does that to us. It seems like a lot of the weight and responsibility has been put towards you in keep your mom safe. You have mentioned that you were going to counseling. Do you feel like you can confide in your counselor about what has been going on at home? Were you waiting for when you turn 18 years old before running away? If you run away now and go to a shelter, then the shelter would have to call your parent to get their consent. If you leave now, do you think your parents file a run way report? If you decide to stay at someone’s house without your parents consent than that person could be charged with harboring a run away. It sounds like you have able to identify what could be possible barriers. Perhaps you could contact one of the shelters to see if they can assistance in transportation to their shelter. Do you know where any pay phones might be in your area or asking a business if you could use their phone? Also some go to the hospital and ask to speak with a social worker. The social worker maybe able to help you also. You are more than welcome to call in here at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929). We are a 24/7 confidential hotline. You can call and talk about whatever you are comfortable with. Good Luck! We were able to pull up a few shelters in your city:

El Pueblo Boys and girls Ranch-24 line at (719) 544-7496. Their fees vary, best to call and by appointment, they provide basic service and alternative housing for youth.

Pueblo Youth Service Bureau-hotline number is 1-800-575-7972 or (719)542-5161 (not 24 hours), no fee, you can call in, drop in or by appointment, they provide alternative housing.

Covenant House (Nine line) - 1-800-999-9999 can also assist in finding shelter.

**Guest** · 02-03-2008, 03:11 AM

Re: being withheld...

Well, with my counselor, she has made it very adiment that pretty much anything I say to her she can report. And I would rather not have the Social Services called because, first of all, I dont want to go into foster care, and second of all even if i wasnt taken into foster care, my 15 year old brother would be. My parents dont treat him bad.. Just me... And in my state it is leagal for someone who is 18 years old to leave home, and my parents already know that Im moving out then. So im not exactly running away but I will be leaving when Im 18. And I know that if I was to run away now my parents would file a runaway report. When I ran away they had every cop in town looking for me for that month and a half. And my parents wont let me stay with a friend or anything. Personally I believe that they enjoy to see me miserable. I know that sounds like a bad assumption, but it is what I personally believe. Thank you for the shelters. It may be helpful in the future. Are there some shelters, like the ones you listed perhaps, that I would be able to stay at when I'm 18 so I can save up money to be able to live on my own? Since that was my main concern. My parents won't let me get a job until after im 18 so that way I can move out, for a while. So, do you think that would at all be a possibility?
Thank you.

**ccsmod0** · 02-03-2008, 07:51 AM

Re: being withheld...

Thank you for contacting NRS. Yes, you are right that if Social Services will remove all siblings from their home if they feel that it’s dangerous to the well-being of both of you. Although Social Services have a process that they follow. They take the report it goes in their data base and at that time they will determine what their next step will be. They might take the report and create a file. Each time that allege abuse happens, Social Services can be contacted. Some times it may feel frustrating because the abuse is still happening. They may be more alert of your home and also helps in building a case against the abuse. Social Services will first try to work with you and your family. Their priority is to keep you and your brother safe. If possible they will help to support your family in unification. In dangerous circumstances, they would remove the kids from that environment. Social Services will try to place you. This might be with a relative, friend of the family, youth shelter and than foster care if there are no other possibilities. You are also correct that if you left home after turning 18 years old; you would no longer be considered a runaway. It sounds like last time you had ran away that your parents want the police to make a strong effort into finding you. Do you feel that your parents are anticipating if you stay at a friend’s house that you might runaway from there? It’s not fair for you to be made miserable and sense that your parents are getting enjoyment from it. You have done a great job in planning for when you turn 18. It sounds exasperating that your parents aren’t allowing you to get a job. Have you thought about applying for jobs closer to the month of August? Do you think it would be less stressful to have a job line up for when you are 18? You can call us any time at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) or you can post a bulletin message again and we can respond back to you. We wish you the best of luck! We were able to find a few shelters in your city:

YWCA Pueblo- (719)542-6904

Wayside Cross Gospel Rescue Mission- (719)545-5744

Boys’ and Girls’ Club- (719)544-2960

Announcement

being withheld...

being withheld...

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment

Comment