Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Best age to runaway

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Best age to runaway

    Like the age you are less likely to be searched for

  • #2
    Re: Best age to runaway

    Thank you for reaching out through our bulletin boards. It sounds like you are trying to get some legal information on what is the best age to runaway at. Now we are not lawyers here so we are unable to give you any specific legal advice but we are happy to talk through the situation with you.

    In most states the age of majority, when a youth is considered an adult and can leave home without permission, is 18. However there are some states (sometimes it depends on the city or county) that the age of majority is 17 or can even be past 18. There may also be discrepancies between the age of majority and the age a youth is considered a runaway. For example we often hear that local police may no longer take a runaway report or make a youth return back home at 17. In most cases the closer you are to the age of majority in your state, usually 18, the less action police are most likely to take.
    Sometimes the best thing to do is to contact the local police in your area to find out the most accurate information for the city/county you are in. A few questions you may want to ask your local authorities are…

    *At what age is a youth no longer considered a runaway?
    *If a 17 y/o leaves home without permission, do you still take a runaway report?
    *If yes: what happens if/when that youth is found?

    If you would like to discuss your situation more in depth you can always contact us at our 24 hour hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We also have an online chat that is available from 4:30p to 11:30p CST. While we can’t give you specific legal advice there is always someone available to listen, provide support, and discuss helpful options and resources. All of our services are completely confidential and anonymous. Please feel free to reach out to us anytime. Take care.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Help

      My parents are very abusive. They are very scary and I'm worried about even saying this. Two months ago I was in the hospital for the last time they beat me and gave me a broken leg. I am twelve years old and I would like to run away. I have $7,000 of birth money left. I have a house I can go to already. It's my older brothers house but he lives 200 miles away. Please give me some insight on how to get away from my family.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Best age to runaway

        Hey there,

        We’re glad you reached out to us. It sounds like a scary and difficult situation. You are brave to reach out for help. No one deserves to be abused or to feel unsafe at home. It’s good that your brother is willing to help you and offer you a place to stay.

        If you feel unsafe at home, it’s important for you to protect yourself. Consider if there are any adults in your life that you feel comfortable telling about the abuse at home – maybe a family member, teacher, counselor, or friend’s parent? You can also call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) and we can talk with you about your options for leaving home. We also have phone numbers for organizations near you that help runaway or abused youth.

        We’re not legal experts, but we know that running away is not illegal. If you and your brother decide you living with him is a good idea, it works best if you can get your parents’ permission to live with him. If you don’t get their permission and they decide to press charges against your brother, he could get into legal trouble. It’s important for you and your brother to talk about the risks behind you staying with him.

        Also, if you are interested in talking with someone about the abuse without letting them know who you are, you can call the Childhelp Hotline at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453). If you want and are comfortable, Childhelp can help you file a report with the authorities that says that your parents are abusing you. The authorities can get involved and find a safe place for you to live.
        We wish you the best of luck. If you have any questions or want to talk, give us a call 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929).

        Best,

        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          I am not sure if I have abusive parents, but I have been thinking about running away. I am 11 years old but turning 12 soon. I've planned out the money situation, and won't be able to make a run for it until 15 years old. I am waiting until I also get a car so I can leave this hellhole. My mom will scream and call me a little ********** and ass and unappreciative. She will also hit me and my brother, but being the younger sibling, I've been more abused than my brother. My dad can also sometimes yell and scream at us, but not as harsh as my mom. I adore my school and friends, and the only time I've seen someone runaway, was Jenny Humphrey in Gossip Girl, at the age of 15. I wish I could go live with my grandparents, but the live in Canada and I live in Cali.I have no one to turn to, and have been through too much. I don't think I could do it, because I only own 19$ and I don't know, thousands, in my college fund. I get 100$ for my birthday, as well as Christmas, and only get half because the other half is for my college account, but I suspect that my mom uses it herself. Please help me! Should I wait or go? Because I can't stay with a friend, someone will rat me out, and I have to tell someone in real life. Should I tell my grandparents? Or keep it to myself?

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Thank you for contacting National Runaway Safeline. We are very sorry to hear about the way your parents have been treating you. Abuse is never okay, and you don't deserve to be hit or constantly yelled at. If you ever feel as though you are in immediate danger, we encourage you to contact 911. You do have the option of reporting the abuse, you could talk to someone you trust such as your grandparents or a teacher at school. If you would like to report the abuse, you may want to take pictures of any bruises that you may have as evidence of the abuse. Child Help (1-800-422-4453) is a great resource for child abuse reporting and to get more information on how to transfer custody.

            It seems like you want to runaway from home, having a plan about where you would go and how you would take care of yourself is important. If you decide to leave home before you turn 18, your parents have the right to file a runaway report. With a runaway report, if the police find you they would return you home. If you were to stay with a friend or family member without your parent's consent, they could get in trouble for harboring a runaway. You could try asking your parents if they would allow you to stay with your grandparents. If you have any other questions or just want to talk, please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.
            Last edited by ccsmod2; 01-27-2018, 02:00 AM.

        • #6
          I am 12 but Im almost 13 i Want to runaway from home. My teachers bully me And even My principal bullys me. My mom always takes there side and sometimes gets drunk and yells and hits me. We live in a small horrible apartment and a small sad town. We live in ny. I have $200 but I also know we're my moms secret stash of cash is so when I leave I can take that. I have tons of supplies and maps and stuff. I'm completely prepared. I know my exact route and I have booked bus and train tickets for when I leave and I have a date on my calendar for the date I leave. I am severely deppresed and have anxiety. My dad killed himself. I was just wandering how much heat would be on me if I left?

          Comment


          • ccsmod7
            ccsmod7 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like you have been through so much between you what has gone on at home and at school. We are so sorry to hear about the loss of your dad, and we want to be a support for you. That is not okay that your teachers bully you and that your mom hits you, you so deserve to be treated with respect.

            You mentioned that your mom sometimes gets drunk and hits you. That seems so hard to deal with, you do have the right to report the abuse at home to child protective services. To learn about your reporting options you might reach out to the expert child advocates at Child Help 1-800-422-4453.

            To answer your question, if you left home at 12/13 without permission, your guardian can file a runaway report for you with local police and if you are found you would be returned home. Running away is not illegal, rather it is a status offense or something you cannot do due to your age. However, if you were to take your mom's cash that could be considered stealing and it could make it so there are legal consequences.

            It sounds like you have made a plan and are set on leaving. One thing to always consider is your safety. There are folks out there that prey on unaccompanied minors so you might try to only talk to people who you know and trust, and have met in person. It is also important to think about where you are planning on going until you are 18 and how you are going to survive. Please do not hesitate to call us if you ever need resources or need to talk through your plan. We are here to listen, here to help.

            Best,

            NRS

        • #7
          Hey, so, I am not abused at home or anything. I am just really depressed and I sort of have a plan on running away. But I am not sure if it will work. I have to many people in the house and all of them except for one bring me down all the time. And the one that doesn’t bring me down, I don’t know if I can trust. I am not good with trusting, I don’t think I ever will be. I don’t know what to do and I am really thinking about leaving tonight. I know what I am going to do for money walk to take for clothes and everything but I just don’t know where to go. I am very hesitant about this website but I have read through other people’s and thought this was a good website to check. I haven’t booked anything and I live in Cali. I am thinking of booking a plane ticket or something. I am not sure. My parents are always mad my mom is always grumpy and takes everything out on everyday. I don’t know about my dad. Please help me! I really don’t know what to do. I am thinking about leaving today tomorrow or after tomorrow. I don’t know. Please help

          Comment


          • ccsmod9
            ccsmod9 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. Its good to remember if you are younger that getting on a plane might not be plausible as there are age restrictions on any plane and if you do not meet those you cannot board. It also might help to discuss it with an adult you trust as they might be able to give you better ideas, Information, etc. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
            If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
            We hope to hear from you soon.
            Be safe, NRS

        • #8
          hello there, so here's the thing.

          i am 12 almost 13 and me and my best friend want to run away. she mainly wants to help me deal with my home situation. she has always been supportive and we see this as sort of....a last resort. i am a closeted transgender ftm (female to male) and her family does accept her. (she is bisexual.) but my mother is already toxic, sort of a fear-me-love me type. sometimes she will yell at me for no reason when i do something slightly wrong. we live in colorado, and i am not sure if there any laws protecting me for a unsupportive-toxic/abusive parent runaway situation. we are Christians, and she has pushed away my aunt who is a lesbian. i feel unsafe and worried what she will say, and will most likely hit me. last month she got angry at me because i didn't clean my room the way she wanted it cleaned. she threw her book at me and broke my lamp, it falling on the ground and smashing. (it was a expensive glass one.) and after blamed it on me. saying things such as "you did this you little s***" and she has told me many times that she is meaner than my grandmother and will beat me if i stand up to her. i am not a only child, but i am the youngest. i have two older sisters who have moved away with my dad and my two brothers who live close by.

          i do have a place in mind to get to and the money situation sort of figured out. me and my best friend are the same age and like i said want to leave once we turn 13. is that safe? even if i do feel very unsafe at my current living arrangement. my father lives in detroit, and we were planning to go there. he is an athiest , so i think he would be supportive of me. i fear that if i do leave, she will find me and murder me. although most mothers say this as a joke, my mother is a very serious woman, and when i was younger she would also say "i put you in this world and i can take you out of it." on another note of her being the fear me love me type of mother she is, she always says stuff like "i am your mother so you can tell me anything." , "you always say you have these things but you don't" (i have all the symptons, and mental conditions of being schizophrenic. my brother has horrible anxiety.) she calls me vile names on the daily. like i said, i am a transgender male (female to male) i have medium length hair, almost boy short. my best friend calls me my preffered name (kody) and pronouns (he/him), and my mother has called me f*****, hag, and a n***** because of being half african american on my dads side. i look like him. she has threanted to fork me over to my father and sisters, i always say no but deeply want a yes. i am scared of what will happen if i say yes.

          any advice? should i runaway or not?

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline on our public forum. We will do our best to help you through this difficult situation. We are mainly here for support and help find some guidance to local resources that might be able to help a youth through their particular situation and we aren’t here to tell you what to do because you know your situation a lot better than we do. So we can’t really answer your question for you. We just want you to know your options and with whatever you choose that you’re safe and not on the streets.

            It sounds like you are feeling threatened by your mom. No one deserves to be treated that way at all. You have rights to protect yourself against this kind of behavior. Just know that you always have the right to report any abuse (physical, mental, sexual, or neglect/abandonment) to child protective service in your state. If you’re not sure of how to do that or is you have some questions about the process, you can always feel free to reach out to us or another hotline that deals with abuse specifically. That hotline is “Child Help (National Child Abuse Hotline)” (1-800-422-4453 / childhelp.org).

            Only you know yourself when it’s time to leave home due to it being an unsafe situation. You mentioned that you had an idea of trying to go to your father’s house to be safe. Contacting your dad in advance and discussing your travel plans, etc. might be a good option that you might consider so that you can stay safe and he can be aware or what is happening at home. Sounds like he is a good support system in your life so he might be able to help you out more.

            So in addition to this information you stated in your email that you identify as Trans and that your mother doesn’t really acknowledge that fact. One organization that is a really great resource to reach out to be is a hotline called "Trans Lifeline”. That hotline is answered only by people who are Trans and who identify outside the gender binary. They might be a really great support for your brother through this time. It can be really isolating to have your own parents not accept your life choice. You can call them by dialing 877.565.8860 or by visiting their website (http://www.translifeline.org/). They might be able to give you some insight to how to deal with some of these feelings or events that they are happening or even services that they can access if you identify as Trans.

            We are confidential and we are here 24/7 if you would like to speak to somebody at the National Runaway Safeline. Our phone number is 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat online with us at 1800RUNAWAY.org.

        • #9
          Hi there,

          Im currently a 12 year old who is very stressed with everything and I would like to run away. Im tried of fighting with my mom and having to put up with the death threats as well as flinching every time someone hands me something or puts there hands up. For some insight on how bad it is when I was in kindergarten she use to hit me when she was mad about some thing with a stick after she fought with my dad (who never beat me). She also called me multiple swear words. When I was bullied I told her about it but she just did nothing about it. Once when I was in 4th grade she yelled at me to get out of her house because I wanted to be part of a spelling bee but I couldn't spell some words and needed help with them. How should I run away? I have been saving up pocket money for a few months now, and I am of desperate need of some help even though she hasn't done any other things to me as I got older but I still have the urge to run away.
          Last edited by ccsmod1; 10-21-2019, 03:39 AM. Reason: Looking for runaway partners

          Comment


          • ccsmod1
            ccsmod1 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey there,

            Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home you're walking around on eggshells and constantly worried about being hurt. Your mom's behavior isn't acceptable and you shouldn't be subjected to that. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.

            You mentioned quite a few things about your mom beating you and making death threats and it causes us concern for your safety and well-being. Absolutely no one deserves to be abused. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It may also be a good idea to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

            You brought up that you told your mom that you were being bullied but were unable to get any help from her. You should be treated with respect everywhere you go and you should feel comfortable at school. If you feel comfortable you can always disclose what’s going on with a trusted teacher, school counselor, or other personnel; they may be able to help. You can also check out https://kidshealth.org/en/teens/bullies.html for some “Bullying Survival Tips”.

            If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.

            Stay safe,
            NRS

        • #10
          I am 14 years old and I'm turning 15 in 6 months. My grandma isnt abusive but she'll embarrass me in public and over the phone. My uncle isn't the best man either. I cant go to my mom or dad because they dont have custody of me. I'm thinking about making a run for it soon. I have some money and a way out. Should I go for it soon or should I wait?

          Comment


          • ccsmod0
            ccsmod0 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,
            Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on with you grandma and uncle. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
            While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without your guardian's permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
            We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by forum to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
            If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
            Be safe,
            NRS

        • #11
          I am 12 years old and I feel like running away. My mom verbally and physically abuses calling fat, pig,retarded and hitting me in the eye, head and I got a black eye from her. I can't take it anymore. What should I do?????

          Comment


          • ccsmod2
            ccsmod2 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hello There,
            Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. Wow it seems like you are going through an awful situation. You do not deserve to be called those names or to be physically abused.
            You do have the right to make an abuse report. You have a few options to do this. One option would be to talk with your school counselor about what has been going on. Because your school counselor is a mandated reporter so they would be required to make a report. Another option would be to call Child Help at: 1800-422-4453, and they can help you make a report. If you are in immediate danger please call the police.
            You mentioned wanting to run away, we are not legal experts but we do have some information. If you were to leave home without your legal guardian’s permission you could be considered as a runaway. If the police do find you they most likely would bring you back home. You could see if any of your friends or family members would allow you to stay with them.
            We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore your options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to help and to listen. Best of luck!
            NRS

        • #12
          my mom threatend to slap me and calls me names
          cna you help me

          Comment


          • ccsmod0
            ccsmod0 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hey there,
            You mentioned experiencing emotional abuse which may be reportable against your mom. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.
            We hope this helps. Please reach out if we can offer any further support.
            Be safe,
            NRS

            Please click the link below to fill out our survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

        • #13
          Hey,
          I need help. My parents are alcoholics, and I’m on the verge to run away. I have a 5 year old brother, and I’m 11. My father calls my brother a crybaby, a jerk, etc, just because he’s very sensitive....my dog get’s beat for ripping a sock, or one of his own toys. I myself am sensitive, and get similar emotional abuse. I plan to take them both with me, (my brother and my dog). I thought about staying at my best friends house over night, and then leaving to another place. What if I’m caught? Please help...

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,

            Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that things at home are so hard. It was brave of you to reach out to us today.

            You stated that your parents are alcoholics and that they call your little brother names and physically abuse your dog. We are very sorry this is happening at home, and we understand it must be a very hurtful environment for you. Your brother and your dog do not deserve to be treated like this, and at 11-years-old you should not have to be concerned about their safety.

            It sounds like you want to run away with your brother and your dog. You said you want to stay one night at a friend’s and then move forward from there. Questions to ask yourself include, where will you go next, how will you get there, and what will you do once there. In our experience finding shelters that will accept people so young, as well as animals, may be difficult. If you are caught, as you mentioned, by police, you will not be arrested, as running away is not illegal, but the police will probably bring you back home. If you are caught by other adults, they also might alert your parents and may even try to bring you back home.

            This may be a good time to consider other trusted adults in your life. At the friend’s house at which you plan to stay, you might enlist their parents to help talk to yours about what’s going on at home. When there is abuse in a home, it is important people know about it. You parents should be held accountable for their actions. Talking to other friends’ parents or even a school counselor may be helpful at this time. Be prepared, as they might want to talk to your parents about what’s going on directly.

            Of course if you or your brother are ever in danger, you can call 9-1-1. You can also call any Animal Cruelty number by looking up the nearest in your area to report abuse of your dog, but keep in mind this may mean the dog is removed from the home.

            Thanks again for reaching out to us. We hope that some of this information was helpful, but if you need more, we encourage you to reach out to us by phone at 1-800-RUN-AWAY or by instant message at 1800runaway.org. Stay safe and stay strong.

            Sincerely,
            NRS

        • #14
          My mother beats me with a belt, slaps me, calls me awful names, etc. That's not what I care about though, it's the fact that I'm having horrible thoughts about myself and sometimes just want to end it all that is worrying me. My mother isn't abusive I guess but she really hurts be a lot, but she doesn't seem to know. I have once tried to runaway from home at the age of twelve but I got caught and was took back home to my mother. I am now almost fourteen and am considering running away. I have no money and nobody/no place to runaway to. I need help and even if you don't want to help, please do not try and find me and tell my mother.

          Comment


          • ccsmod13
            ccsmod13 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you for taking the time to contact us here at NRS and we appreciate you sharing your situation with us. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-8255 (www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org) is always available if you need someone to talk to about how you have been feeling.

            You mentioned that your mom has been beating you and talking down to you. You do not deserve to be treated this way and it is not okay for anyone to harm you. You deserve to feel safe and supported at home. One option that you do have is to make a report to child protective services. This might mean being removed from the home immediately, but it could start a process with that outcome. If you would like to learn more about what the reporting process might look like for you or you would like support with making the report, you can speak with an advocate at the National Child Abuse Hotline, childhelp.org; 1-800-422-4453.

            If you do decide you need to leave home, a helpful start would be to reach out to friends or family members who you might be able to stay with. Having a safe place to go would be the most important step. We are here 24/7 to listen and help as much as possible. If you call the hotline or use our live chat we can brainstorm your possible options with you, find ways for you to feel more supported, and come up with a safe plan if you do decide to leave home. We are available for immediate support 24/7 by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or through live chat at 1800runaway.org.

            Stay strong and stay safe,
            NRS
        Previously entered content was automatically saved. Restore or Discard.
        Auto-Saved
        x
        Insert: Thumbnail Small Medium Large Fullsize Remove  
        x
        x
        Working...
        X