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Adopted and 16 wanting to leave home

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  • #31
    My friend is adopted and she wants to leave the house how old do u have to be can u be 16 or 17

    Comment


    • ccsmod13
      ccsmod13 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for reaching out to us here at NRS. The age of majority in most states is 18. This is the age where you are considered a legal adult with the freedom to choose where you live. If you friend leaves home before she turns 18, her parents can report her as a runaway to the police. Running away is not illegal but it is a status offense. This means her adoptive parents can ask police to return her home if they know where she is staying.

      If you or your friend have more questions or would like to talk more about her situation, please do not hesitate to reach out again. We are available 24/7 for immediate support by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or through live chat at 1800runaway.org.

      Take care,
      NRS

  • #32
    Hey there I'm 17 and I am done living where I'm at I want to live with my boyfriend but I have epilepsy and my adoptive parents won't give me my meds to keep and take so I won't have a seizure but I don't want to live at home any more can I legally leave without having the police get involved ???

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello,

      Thank you for reaching out to us and sharing a bit about what's going on at home. We are very sorry to hear things aren't going well with your adoptive parents. Just so you know, their withholding necessary medication from you would count as a form of abuse and you could make a report on what they are doing through your state's Child Abuse Reporting hotline. You can also report abuse through us here at National Runaway Safeline or through Child Help (www.childhelp.org) at 1-800-422-4453. Of course, we never tell anyone what to do and respect your decision whether to report or not.

      You ask a really good question about leaving home at seventeen. Eighteen years old is generally the age that an individual may leave home without permission from their parent or legal guardian. We are not legal experts here but we can speak in general terms. If you are under 18 and leave home without permission, your parent/guardian may file a runaway report with the police. What actions the police take once you are filed as a runaway can vary a lot from state to state and even city to city so we cannot predict exactly what would happen in your case. Generally speaking, if you encounter a police officer while reported as a runaway, you will likely be returned home. However, in that case there may be services (family counseling, etc.) available to you as a youth in crisis/runaway but again, police procedures related to offering those services can be different based on your location or the details of your situation. Another thing to consider is that while running away is not a crime, a legal adult who allows you to stay with them may be putting themselves at risk for being charged with harboring a runaway. One way to find out the laws in your area is to call your local police and ask what their policies are regarding runaway youth.

      We'd like to help you figure out what all your options are, perhaps even some options you haven't considered yet. The best way to reach us is by phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Our lines are open 24/7 and we are a confidential, safe place to talk about anything you are going through. You can also reach us through our chatroom which is found at the top of our webpage: www.1800runaway.org.

      We hope to hear from you soon. Stay safe and good luck!

      NRS

  • #33
    Hey , so I'm 15 about to turn 16 in month I've been adopted since i was younger its been very hard living here now that i'm older bc I'm teen and I've got in some trouble not bad but minor trouble and my parents stopped trusting me but i understand why but over time my mom says awful things and making me feel bad about myself she treats me different then her kids shes rude and mean and so are my siblings (not biological ones) they have said stuff like I'm ugly always picking on how i look and pointing things out about me that i'm insecure about and joking about it and my mother has said things like im insecure called me worthless , and once wen i got in trouble she told my uncle and sisters that if i got slight attitude with them they can slap and punch me which i have trouble controlling my attitude and i cant help it sometimes i have bad anxiety and i suffer from depression its hard living with people who don't like me . i wanna go live with my sister but Idk how to ask my parents and I doubt they'll let me

    please respond
    Last edited by ccsmod4; 09-09-2020, 03:19 AM.

    Comment


    • ccsmod4
      ccsmod4 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

      We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. You don't deserve to be abused in any way. It is not your fault. You have the right to want to be treated fairly.
      As of right now you’re feeling like leaving and going to live with your sister.
      We understand that this might be a challenging thing to do.
      You are very strong to reach out and share what has been going on.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of options that may lead to ideas previously not thought of. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this.

      We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this trying time time.
      If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Be safe and stay strong,
      NRS
      Last edited by ccsmod4; 09-09-2020, 02:29 AM.

  • #34
    Hello, My name is Emma, I recently turned 16 (August 24th) And I just want to give a quick run down of my situation. I was put into foster care at around 8 years old and adopted by my biological grandparents on my mothers side. I hate it here, Mostly just one person my grandmother. She forces me to call her mom and I hate it she will never be a mother to me. She is Mentally abusive and completely toxic, For example she will use scaring tactics to try and get me to do things (Like threaten to beat and in some extreme cases choke me or hit me until I die). She has told me if i ever wanted to leave it will be through killing myself. I have screamed and cried for her to let me leave but she wont listen. She makes me pull down my pants and show her if i have anything in my underwear (because i have a bladder problem that causes me to leak a little nothing serious) Its a very scary thing and reading some of these replies i am scared i wont be able to leave. She has told me she wont let me leave till i am 21. She will throw things at me hit me and even when i am on period, Publicly embarrass me, telling me I am a disgusting girl in front of my family and strangers. The mental trauma is starting to get to me I have suicidal thoughts and even thoughts about killing my family. I am opening up to you random strangers because i am afraid of what will happen if this continues. I NEED TO GET OUT, The police have been sent to my house on multiple occasions, (Me opening up about this to my school them reporting it, Me running away and being forced to go back home, etc...) And it all ended with me getting in more trouble, I am scared. Please help me. I have heard that firefighters will help but how do i get in contact with them what if i cant leave and i really am stuck here forever, Please help.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,
      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now. It sounds like you’re fearing that the situation may end in suicide if things don’t change. Your safety and well-being is important. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255); www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a great resource to reach out to in addition to our crisis services.
      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. This may be an isolating and lonely time for you, but you are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
      If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon. Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
      We hope to hear from you soon.
      Be safe and stay strong,
      NRS

  • #35
    im 13 and adopted but my parents treat me like im not even their own, im pretty much miserable, they treat theyre own kids like theyre some kings and treat me like trash. im not treated equally here and i hate my life i just want to run away, am i able to get re adopted by someone else?and they are so sexist.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello and thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are going through some intense stuff and we want to support you. I would reach out to your case worker, if you have one, to discuss your options. We would be happy to help you in whatever way we can. We can provide referrals to mental health resources, shelters, legal advocacy, among other things. We can also just talk you through whatever your situation is and help you figure out what your options are. We aim to empower youths and we prioritize their safety and their well-being. If you are interested in anything that we have to offer, please don’t hesitate to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929 or chat us at 1800runaway.org.

      Take care,
      NRS

  • #36
    Hi,

    I'm fifteen and I don't like my mom. Well i am adopted but I just don't feel safe anymore. My mom is in the military but for most of my life she was verbally abusive. It wasn't until the last week 2nd to last week of October that she got severely abusive. At first it would just be her slapping me or calling me a ********** or just yelling. When my school got shutdown for two weeks the last week was really tough for me. One morning when she woke up she just looked at me and rolled her eyes and said that she wished my school was open so that she didn't have to look at my ugly face. Then she started yelling at me and she was telling me how I was stupid and how I let people walk over me and she said that i was weak. She got made because I wasn't really listing and then she slammed the top of my chrome book closed. That Friday was the third day my teacher has called her because I wasn't getting on the zoom calls. She started yelling and then she got up. Before I could realize what she was about to do she took me by my face threw me on the floor and started kicking me and she got mad when I started screaming. I wanna say 13 minutes after that when I got out of the shower she asked me if I wanted to be a victim. I told her no ma'am and she said are you sure I said yes ma'am then she told me to stop trying to make other people's life story into my own. I told my uncle at firt he was gonna let me stay with him then he said well we don't want her to get arrested and we don't want you back in the system and now I just want to runaway.

    Comment


    • ccsmod0
      ccsmod0 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like you’re quite overwhelmed by things at home right now and you mentioned being harmed. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. You may also be able to report any mistreatment to CPS. Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. They can tell you more about how CPS could respond to your situation. If you ever need assistance calling out to CPS to make an abuse or neglect report please call is at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

      While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

      Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

      If you would like to talk more in detail please chat soon through our website www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button) if you are unable to call in. We unfortunately cannot give advice as we are non-directive. You know your situation best

      We hope to hear from you soon.

      Be safe,

      NRS

  • #37
    Hi
    ok so im 14 years old going on 15 in march and i've been living with this family for six years adopted for 4 years going on 5 (since i was 11) and all i do is get in trouble and get yelled at i have a younger "sibling' that got adopted with me and all she does is get me in trouble i have biological family but i don't want to go with them because i cause too much trouble i don't want to hurt anybody anymore. my adoptive mom now wants nothing to do with me so now i feel outta place(my dad told me to stay away for a little bit but i don't think the relationship between me and my mom will get better just worse) she said she doesn't want to see me and that i am not allowed to leave my room unless im eating and now she's giving me the silent treatment so now im in my room all day i think i could go crazy. she scares the crap out of me every time i'm around her now i feel like she going to hit me (she never done it yet but she believes in spanking but never laid a hand on me but she still could and that's what scares me to death) i want to leave but i don't know where to go, i messed up so bad! i just want somewhere that will care for me but also give me freedom to hang out with friends and give me a phone so i can stay connected i want to be able to date and tell the mom everything, and someone who knows when to ask if im ok, or just holds me close. i don't know why i said yes to get adopted by them i geesus we made the wrong choice but the dad is really lovin and i don't want to lose that he's the little love i have left of this family. what do i do PLEASE HELP ME

    Comment


    • ccsmod2
      ccsmod2 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello There,
      Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, it takes a lot of courage to reach out and we are so glad that you have decided to reach out to us.
      It sounds like you are going through a difficult situation and we want you to know that you are not alone. We are sorry to hear that the relationship between you and your adoptive mother is not good. One option to consider would be to talk to your school counselor about what has been going on. Even though many schools are virtual right now, school counselors are still meeting with students.
      We are always here for support for you, and you can chat or call us anytime we are always an ear to listen. We would love to help you more with your situation please give us a call at 1800RUNAWAY. We wish you the best of luck!
      NRS

  • #38
    Hello!

    I'm a 15 years old boy living in the Philippines and I want to get adopted because of how my Mother treat me like a trash, My Mother is afraid of my Sexuality. She's Ashamed of me, and she even said that I was disgusting! That I'm the only person in our Family that's Bisexual and I'm ruining their name. I'm sick hearing those words, I sometimes become suicidal and just cry in the corner. If someone is interested on adopting me. Please do.

    ​​

    ​​​​
    Last edited by ccsmod15; 11-20-2020, 06:11 AM.

    Comment


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and we understand it takes courage to reach out for help. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: https://www.childhelplineinternation...pline-network/.

      We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.
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