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Adopted and 16 wanting to leave home

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  • #16
    i’m 15 living in a home with people i’ve known since i was two but i don’t like the conditions i’m living in and there is no way for me to tell anyone because if i do i get screamed at and neglected more than what i already am. due to my living conditions i got involved with some bad things and got put on probation. is there anything i can do in the state of alabama to fix my living conditions because really and truly i can’t take this place anymore.


    • ccsmod15
      ccsmod15 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hello! Thank you so much for reaching out. It sounds like you’re going through a lot right now, and we are here to help.
      To begin with, you mentioned earlier that you’re 15, and are living in unstable conditions in your home, causing you to get involved with some bad things. We want you to know that you’re really brave for seeking help, and you are not alone. If you at any time feel unsafe, you can text the word safe and your location to 44357. The national safe place will text you a location to go to, and a case worker might come out to assists you. In the same way, if you’re experiencing any time of abuse at home, you can reach out to the national child abuse hotline at 1800) 422-4453, and they may be able to advise you if it’s necessary to get child protective services involved.

      Unfortunately we aren’t legal experts, but if you decide to run away without your guardian’s approval, your guardian can contact the authorities, and file a runaway report. Whoever you end up staying with, may face some consequences. If you want to know more about runaway laws in your city and state, you may contact your local non-emergency number at 205) 328-9311. If you need an emergency shelter, the Family Connection, Inc. offers shelter and counseling in Alabama, and can be reached at (205) 664-2273.

      Again, thank you so much for reaching out. We know you’re in a very hard situation, and we’re so proud that you are wanting to seek help. Please feel to reach out to us anytime on chat, or by phone at 1800) 786-2929, and we can call out anywhere on your behalf as well. Best of luck!

  • #17
    Living with my parents isn’t the best can I leave and they don’t have the authority to bring me back home I turn sixteen in a week


    • ccsmod13
      ccsmod13 commented
      Editing a comment
      Hi there,

      Thanks for reaching out to NRS. It can definitely be stressful at home when the adults in our lives are not being supportive. You deserve to be treated in a way that makes you feel safe and happy.

      Generally speaking, if you leave home without permission from your parents, they can report you as a runaway. Running away is not a crime, but it does mean that your parents can have the police return you home. Usually the easiest way to leave without this happening, is if you have your parent's permission. Perhaps there is a family member or another trusted adult who can help you talk to your parents about wanting to live somewhere else. Sometimes having an adult advocate on your side can help keep conversations calm and make sure your needs are being heard.

      We are to here to be a support for you during this challenging time. You can reach out anytime by phone or online chat services if you would like to talk more in detail about your situation and brainstorm possible options together.

      Be safe,

  • #18
    Most people are writing about themselves, but I actually have a question about a friend of mine. My friend was adopted when she was in 7th grade because her birth mother was in jail for drug use. She was excited to finally be adopted at first, but now she is almost 17, and her mother basically abuses her every day. It's not physical abuse, but oftentimes her mom goes to the extremes with everything she does. For example, she was once signed up for a field trip that her mom actually gave her permission to go on, but then the day of the field trip, her mom called her and told her that she was in trouble for not doing the dishes, and now couldn't go on the field trip...but she was already on her way to the field trip. So, naturally, her mom called the school and demanded they give her 2 days of in-school suspension, even though there was nothing for the school to punish her for. She also told me that her mom hides in her house and watches her, waiting for her to do something wrong while my friend doesn't know that her mom is even home. Her mom also once "couldn't trust her" to be home alone, so she had to stay at someone's house while her mom was gone for the night. Well, she didn't have anywhere to sleep. She told her mom this and her mom basically told her that that's her problem. She had to stay at her job for 3 extra hours before finally calling CPS, who made her mom let her sleep at home. On top of that, she's not allowed to have a driver's permit or license because her mom doesn't want her leaving the house. Long story short: her mom is actually insane. What can my friend do to get out of that house? She's 16 now, 17 next summer, but has no driver's license and no other house to go to. She's not sure what she can even do.


    • ccsmod3
      ccsmod3 commented
      Editing a comment
      You mentioned wanting to know how your friend can leave home before turning 18. The easiest way to leave home is with her mom's permission. We understand that might be challenging, however, maybe there’s another family member, relative, or a family friend who could help to communicate how your friend is feeling to her mom. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 to be considered and demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process and may even cost some money for court fees. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.

      Please reach out soon so that we may offer support and resources to you. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).
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