17 year old in NY wants to move out

[Unregistered]

want to move out

im 17 and ill be 18 in six mouths but I cant stay at my house any more im getting way to stressed out and my mom left a bruies on me and I have a family member I can stay with he cares a lot about me and hes worried about me and my sister and he doesn't care if I live with him but I don't want the cops called on me even though my mom doesn't care if me and my sister moves out/

[ccsmod15]

re: Want to move out

Hello-

Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear that you are going through a rough time at home. It is not ok that your mother physically hurt you, no one deserves to experience any kind of abuse. It is great you have a family member you can count on and that cares about you and your sister a lot. We are happy you reached out to us and we will help you in any way we can.

You asked us if you will have the cops called on you if you go live with your family member. Since you are under the age of 18, you can only go live with someone else if you have permission from your parent/guardian. If you do not get permission, but decide to leave anyways, you will be considered a runaway. At this point your parents/guardians have the right to do whatever they can to bring you back home. One option your parent/guardian can take is to call the police and file a runaway or missing person’s report. If the police know where you are, they will pick you up and take you back home. It is important to mention that although we are not legal experts, we can say that it is not against the law for a minor to run away. This means that you would not get into any legal trouble if you left, but the police could try to take you back home. If you run away, your parents also have the option to file charges against any adult you are staying with. This means that your mom could press charges against your family member for ‘harboring a runway’ and they could get into legal trouble. These are all scenarios that could happen, but nothing is guaranteed. We just want to give you all the information necessary so that you can make a decision that is best for you.

You also mentioned that your mom left bruises on you. As we mentioned earlier, it is not ok that she is physically abusing you. If you are scared for your safety at home you have the right to report abuse to the police. We understand that it can be a scary thing to report abuse. Child Help, is a great resource to call to help guide you through this process. It is a 24/7 hotline that connects you to a crisis counselor who can help you understand the reporting process and what you might expect through the process. The crisis counselor can also provide you support and encouragement. The number for Child Help is 1-800-422-4453.
We are also available to provide you support and help connect you to any resource you may need. We are a 24/7 confidential hotline and would love to talk to you about what is going on at home and possible ways to make your situation easier for you to deal with. You can reach us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).

We wish you the best of luck and hope to hear from you soon.

[Miatheweitheredrose]

turning 16, can I move out?

Hi I'm Mia and I'm turning 16 this month. I need to get out of my home, my mom is constantly drunk and verbally and emotionally bullies me. I can't take it. I have witnesses. I want to get out as soon as possible and have thought about running away or suicide. I can't stand it at home. I cry whenever my mom fights with me. She constantly drinks. I feel worthless and hated here. My friends and aunt have offered to house me can I legally move at 16 if I have a job and they'd drive me to and from work/school. I live in Syracuse, NY.

[ccsmod5]

re: turning 16, can I move out?

Hey there,

Thank you for being able to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline, it seems like you have been going through a pretty tough time at this point in your life. We’re glad you reached out to us. It seems like you and your mom have been having some hard times and you are ready to go.

You mentioned that you have been thinking about suicide, we want you to know that you matter and you are an incredibly strong person for reaching out for help. Perhaps the next time you are feeling suicidal, you are able to reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). They also have a live chat service that you can connect to through this website: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline...elineChat.aspx.

You mentioned that you have been facing some issues with your mother, in some states, what you are experiencing could be considered neglect. If this is something that you want to talk further about or are curious to know what your options are, please feel free to reach out to us by either calling or chatting. No one ever deserves to be treated the way you have been.

We are not legal experts here, which means that we are only able to speak in general terms. In most states, because you are 16, you would still be considered a minor. Meaning that if you were to leave home, regardless of the circumstances, you would need parental consent. As we mentioned, we are not legal experts here, but if you wanted to know some sturdy answers, we would encourage you to reach out to your local police department. If that is something that might make you nervous, please feel free to reach out to us and we would be able to call out for you.

We hope that we were able to help you think a little more about your options and brainstorm some more with you, if you feel like you would still need some more support or go through some more options, please feel free to reach out to us here at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we are here 24/7. We also have a live chat service which is available from 4:30 PM to 11:30 PM CST. We wish you the best of luck in whatever it is you decide to do and hope to hear from you soon.


Stay strong,

NRS

[KalliesCountry]

Well..

My "boyfriend" just got arrested down in Oregon an I live in NC

[ccsmod5]

re: Well..

Hey there,

Thank you for being able to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We are glad we are a resource that comes to mind in this time of crisis. We want you to know that we are here to listen and to help in the best way that we can. If you are able to give us a call or chat with us we would be able to explore your situation a little further with you.

Our lines are available 24/7, this is the fastest method you would be able to get in touch with us. We are more than willing to listen to your situation and help in the best way that we can. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), we also have a live chat program, it seems like that would work best since you are unable to get to a phone. As we mentioned, we would be more than happy to talk about your situation and see what the best way that we can help you is. We wish you the best of luck and hope to get your call or chat soon.

Stay strong,

NRS

[Unregistered]

My 17 year old gilfriend

Hello I'm a young man from the small town of Afton New York. My girlfriend has been living with her grandmother for quite sometime putting up with the verbal insults towards her. her grandmother recently kicked her out and so she went to stay with her friends local police have been in formed of the situation all though they say she has to move back in. I've been doing everything i can to help although it is difficult sense we do not live in the same town. My mother has said that she can come live with us till we are both 18 then me and her can live together if that is what we both desire at that time. my only question is, would it be legal for her to come live with my mother for the time being? we have tried many thing but no other legal options have shown themselves we both wish to do this legally. Shes scared to go back, and im scared for her safety so i was hoping i could get some answers because I've been doing quite a bit of research on the subject and so far nothing is seeming to work...

[ccsmod16]

re: My 17 year old gilfriend

Hi,

Thanks for reaching out to us. It does sound like you are dealing with a difficult, and complicated, situation.

So first off, understand that we cannot give legal advice that will necessarily apply in your situation, but let’s see if we can run through some basic principles to see if any of them will help.

You indicate that your girlfriend is 17, and in most states (including New York) the age of majority is 18, meaning that until that age the young person’s parent or legal guardian has control of where he or she lives. That doesn’t mean the young person has to live with the parent or guardian, just that the parent or guardian has control over where she lives. From what you wrote, it seems like your girlfriend’s grandmother is her legal guardian, but it’s not entirely clear. So I would start by trying to figure out who exactly is the guardian.

As to whether your girlfriend could live with you and your mom, that is likely going to depend on what your girlfriend’s legal guardian says. You can certainly try to get her to agree to your girlfriend living with you and your mom, and if you get her to agree then that would be fine.

You mention that you are concerned about your girlfriend’s safety. If she is being subject to illegal abuse then she should consider reporting that to law enforcement. No one should have to suffer abuse. If your girlfriend wants to call us at 1 800 RUNAWAY (1 800 786 2929) we can try to help her talk through the situation and see if we can identify some ways of dealing with it. We are a confidential hotline, and are here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Best,

NRS

[Unregistered]

17 Moving back to NY but want to move out as soon as i get there!!!

Hi, i am 17 and won't be 18 until July, my fiance whom is 22 currently lives with me and has been for 9 month, unfortunately i live with my mother and step father. I have been planning on moving out, but everytime we attempt to leave, she's threatens to call the police on me. My mother has anger issues, and does not get any help for it, refuses. She's hit my fiance multiple times in the face, all because we have an argument or he's doing something she doesn't like. She's always threatening him, and clearly doesn't like him. My step father is basically the same way. I've been suicidal for 3 years and used to always cut myself because they make me feel so unwanted and invisible, at the moment I'm in Alabama, living in a camper because they don't have a house, and it's been like this since October 18th. I can't take it no more. I just need answers. We're now moving back too New York, January 21. When we move back, i want too leave. I just want to know if she can actually call the police and tell them i ran away? And can she have my fiancé arrest if we leave together. He's lived with me and she's aloud it, he's proposed to me, and asked for their blessing before doing it. They said yes. I just need help knowing what i have too do to get out and away from her, please help me.

[ccsmod2]

re: 17 Moving back to NY but want to move out as soon as i get there!!!

Hi,

Thank you for reaching out to us. It sounds like you are going through a tough time with your family and you really want to be out on your own with your fiancé. There’s a lot to consider with running away so it makes sense that you have questions. We can’t really give advice, but we can definitely help you think through it.

We do want to let you know that while we want to help in any way we can, we are non-directive. So we won’t be able to tell you how to run away. In most states even if you are 17, there is a possibility that you could be sent back home if you do come in contact with the police. As your legal guardian, your mom would have a right to call the police and report you as a runaway. Also, it is possible that your fiancé could be charged with harboring you. But, that usually is up to the police discretion whether or not they would pursue it.

You mentioned that you wanted to go back to New York. If you are staying in Alabama, who are you going back to live with in New York? What’s happening that you want to leave both places? We would need a little more about what is happening in order to give you possible consequences or referrals that could help.

We hope we were able to offer some things for you to consider. If you need to, you can always contact us directly at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Lastly, please note that we offer a live chat via our website at www.1800runaway.org every day from 4:30p to 11:30p CST.

Take care and stay safe,
NRS

[Unregistered]

17 years old and I want to get out

Both of my parents have passed away my mothers bestfriend (my god mother) has taken care of me since I was about a month old. We do not have the best relationship I love her and her family but I am at my breaking point. When I was 14 I started to cut myself and make suicidal attempts. I also ran away. In the station I was told things would change for me when I go back home so I went home. Then this summer as a 16 year old I ran away again I went to family court and they sent me to a program called the door or the open door one of those, anyways I talked to a lawyer and he said I couldn't emancipate my self but I was highly confused because I've read so much about how I could I get an income from my father. I told him I will have a place to stay I will be getting the income from my father and I had a job at the time that my god mother made me quit. Honestly I'm getting to my breaking point and I want to get out so what do I do?

[ccsmod15]

Re: 17 years old and I want to get out

Hi there-
Thank you for reaching out to us and sharing your story. It seems like you’re really going through a lot here. First, we’re sorry to hear about your parents’ passing. We see that you have been living with your godmother for basically your whole life. You shared that when you were 14 you ran away and began to self-harm, and you also had suicidal tendencies. It seems that you’ve tried utilizing social services but that they have not been of too much help regarding your independence and getting out of your house. Hopefully we at the NRS could be of some support.

First, you mentioned that you have self-harmed and had suicidal tendencies in the past. We want you to know that you are not alone in your fight and that there are many services out there that seek to support people just like yourself. Your life is worth it and you deserve to lead it with happiness. The National Suicide Hotline is a great organization that is run by trained counselors that can support you IN stressful emotional situations, regardless of whether you are feeling suicidal or not. They can be reached at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Furthermore, To Write Love on Her Arms is an organization that is “dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire, and invest directly into treatment and recovery.” If you visit their website at https://twloha.com/find-help/local-resources/ you will be able to find a list of resources in your area that can be of support as well.

Next, you mentioned being interested in emancipation. We are not sure when you turn 18, but a lot of times, emancipation is not a viable option for 17 year-olds because the process is so lengthy and most youth turn 18 before it goes through. However, we encourage you to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY so we can get a better look at your situation and explore more options with you that may be of assistance. Through this, we could help you find shelters or connect you with social services, for example.

You shared that you have a job lined up and that you have a source of income – it’s great to hear that you’re thinking about these things in advance in order to be proactive about your independent life. By reaching out to us at our hotline, we can help you find the resources necessary to embark on this journey you have set for yourself. We wish you the best of luck in your situation and hope to hear from you soon.

All the best,
NRS

[Unregistered]

Im 16, i live in NY and i want to run away

So i just turned 16 and my family has been verbally and sometimes physically hurting me. I'm at the point where i cant think straight, have nightmares and suicidal thoughts. I have people to rely on if i do go but im worried ill be caught or they'll be charged. I know what to do and know what supplies i need Just that i still want my education and at least try to have a good life. But i know there's an extremely high chance of me being caught.

[ccsmod16]

Re: 17 year old in NY wants to move out

Hello,

If you have contacted NRS today through another means (for example, live chat, email or bulletin) for the same issue, it would be helpful to let us know that you have already contacted us. NRS understands it takes courage to reach out for help; therefore, we would like to minimize the need for you to repeat your situation and avoid offering you duplicate services.

NRS

[Unregistered]

17 years old want to live with my father

Hi I am 17 years old I live in North Carolina and I have been living with my mother for the pass 10 years I can't take living with her anymore most of my child hood was very depressing she was abuseive physically and verbal its been a back n forth battle with me wanting to stay with my father I would give anything to give anything to go live with my father and brother I am in a much happier state when Im with them me and my mom we have no relationship we don't bond she is always in her friend house smoking weed she told me when I graduate I can go live with my dad now that I graduated she is saying something else trying to force me to go to community college and major on something I have no interest she is very controlling and tells me I have no rights and it's her way only my question is will my dad get In trouble if he purchase a ticket for me and I leave which my dad lives in ny will the cops force me to go back and can she charge him kidnap although he is my biological father I am desperate for some answer I ready to run away if I can live with my dad