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Hi I’m 15 I will be 16 in October, I’m in an abusive home and my father is an alcoholic I plan on running away after I turn 16 and I need to know since I don’t feel safe at home will the police force me to go back there? I have already tried DSS and they did not help me. I want to get away from there so bad. I already have a family that says they would be willing to let me live with them until I turn 18, what do I need to do for them to gain custody of me?
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. From we understand about your situation it is hard to say because typically your parents would have to let go of their custody willingly. Moreover when someone cant take care of you the responsibility falls on the family so aunts or uncles to take care of you. So it would be hard to get your friends family to take you in. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
We hope to hear from you soon.
Be safe, NRS
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If your parents tell you to get out of the house and not come back and its on camera that they tell you that and you leave can you get in trouble for leaving?Comment
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Hi there, thanks for reaching out today. Sounds like your parents told you not to come back home, that sounds really hurtful to hear.
We are not legal experts, but we can speak generally.Typically it is illegal for a guardian to kick out a youth with nowhere to go, so you might be able to report the neglect to child protective services. However, if your guardian threatened to kick you out in the heat of the moment, but did not force you out it could be a different situation. Generally speaking, having that video evidence could help you if you decide to report to child protective services or police, but it does not emancipate you from your parents, they still have their parental rights.
Please do not hesitate to call or chat us if you would like to talk through your situaiton: 1-800-RUNAWAY; www.1800runaway.org. We are here to listen, here to help.
Best,
NRS
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I’m 16 years old and currently live in my mother’s house. I really want to leave and live with my girlfriend. I’ve finished high school and when I try to go to my girlfriends she makes comments like “ you can’t spend all summer up there” and she grounds me day after day so I can’t leave the house. I’m desperate to leave home and everyday I spend stuck in her house I’m closer to harming myself or running away. Please tell me is it legal for me to walk out of her house?Comment
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Though leaving the house isn't illegal getting you back home once the runaway report is made will be something you have no option of you will be sent home no exceptions. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS
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I'm 16 and I'm old enough to move out where do I go and keep my job.Comment
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS
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since my mum has left to live in newzealand , every time I do something wrong my dad tells me to f**k off to newzealand with my mum . he just keeps telling me to f**k off to my mans house , newzealand and just yells at me , accuses me of ******** . My family just keeps saying stuff like " if you do this again you will be going to live with your mum " " f**k off to your f**ken mums* blah blah blah and then they either hit me n ******** I feel like just leaving ..... And I want to stay with my friend for a bit to just have some space for a while. I don't know if this is true but can someone with a blue card take care about someone else's child? I'm 14 and I don't know what to do . I don't know if this is relevant to anything that's on this site but yeahComment
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Thanks so much for reaching out. That takes a lot of courage. We’re sorry to hear that things between you and your family have been tough lately. You don’t deserve to be hit or spoken to in that way. That’s a lot for anyone to handle and we’re here to listen if you need some support. We’re also glad to hear that you have a friend nearby who you could potentially stay with. We aren’t legal experts here, but there’s a few things you might want to know about the laws that affect who you can stay with as a minor. If you were to leave home to stay with your friend without your dad’s permission, your dad (or your legal guardian) would have the right to file a runaway report which could then launch a police search. Filing a runaway report is meant to return you home to your legal guardian. While you would not be in any legal trouble for running away, the friend who you are staying with could potentially be charged with harboring a runaway if a runaway report had been filed. To answer your question regarding the blue card specifically, we need some more information. We would be able to address that aspect of your question over phone or chat.
There are some other options which could allow you to stay with your friend legally. One would be to get your dad’s permission. There are some more in depth and permanent options as well which you could consider if you’re feeling unsafe at home. It is possible for you to file an abuse report which might then lead to an investigation by Child Protective Services and could ultimately lead to you entering into foster care. You could also file for your emancipation which is a process that can take some time and requires you proving your independence to a court of law. If you want to talk more about what any of these options looks like, we would be happy to talk to you on the phone at 1-800-RUN-AWAY or over our chat service. We can also help think of strategies for asking your dad if you can stay at your friend’s for awhile. We hope that answers your questions. Thank you again for reaching out!
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In need of help
im only 16 but I need help I want to go to a new place with my friend I finally find a place where I can get a job at 16 so I can pay rent to leave with friend he is 18 so I just want to know If I will be able to stay cause mum will call the police straight away and do a Search straight away so will I be forced to go backComment
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Hi, and thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
The easiest way to leave home is with your parent's permission. The second way is through Child Protective Services if safety is a concern. Lastly, you can also look into emancipation options. In most states you need to be at least 16 and be able to demonstrate that you can support yourself financially and independently. Emancipation often can be a lengthy process, may cost money for court fees, and may require your parent/guardians consent. We would be happy to look into legal resources if that’s something you are considering.
If you'd like to talk in more detail about your situation or have any questions please call 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat with us (www.1800RUNAWAY.org) as we can best help by phone or chat. Best, NRS
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Me and my girlfriend want to run away we are 15 both of are life's are miserable her mom wont take care of her and my parents are always yelling and wont stop. Were could we go and not be forced back home ?Comment
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Thank you for reaching out to NRS. It sounds like you and your girlfriend are both going through a very tough time and we hope we can connect you with some resources that may be helpful to you. No one should be treated the way you are being treated.
We're not legal experts but we can provide some general information that may be helpful. In most states, the age of majority (when you can legally leave home) is 18. If you do leave home, your parents can file a runaway report.
Running away is not illegal. If you are picked up, the police would likely take you back home.
If you are staying with someone else, and you are picked up there, there is a chance they could be charged with harboring a runaway.
Police handle runaway and harboring cases differently in different jurisdictions. The police may or may not actively look for you. If you call the non-emergency number of your local police department and they may be able to tell you how they would handle cases like yours. If you are not comfortable making the call, please feel free to call us and we can call for you.
Our primary concern is that you remain safe and off the street. If you feel that your safety is threatened, you can always call 911. You can also consider contacting National Safe Place at www.nationalsafeplace.org or text SAFE and your location to 44357. They will provide you the location of the nearest safe place near you.
You and your girlfriend could also consider contacting Child Help (the National Child Abuse Hotline) at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org. They may be able to talk to you about your situation and offer additional resources to help you deal with what you are going through.
You can also always contact us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We have volunteers available 24/7 to talk and to help you find resources that may be helpful to you.
We wish you the best!
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Ive been wanting to run away for 5 years but ive always been scared about what will happen. Ive wondered if i tell the police that my parents dont let me do anything, go places, be alone, hang out with anyone or have friends that do not go to my school especially public school when thats what ive grown up with and theres 5 people at my school and ive told my parents that i dont want to go to that school but they dont care. I always feel like my parents just want a robot. i want to run away but if something goes wrong ill get in big trouble, and i live in the middle of nowhere.Comment
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Hello There,
Thank you for contacting The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through a tough time right now. Wanting to run away for the past five years is difficult and can be stressful. You could consider talking with a school counselor or someone you trust about what is going on.
We are not legal experts but we do have general information on the laws. If you were to leave home without permission your legal guardian could file a runaway report. If the police were to find you they most likely would bring you home. Running away is not illegal so you would not be arrested instead you would be returned home.
We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. We wish you the best of luck!
NRS
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I’m curious about fleeing my current situation I'm 16, my home-life is bad I have no friends. I just want to start a new life on my own is it possible can i survive in the world being 16Comment
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Hey there,
Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do. It’s important to consider all the possibilities that can occur if you leave home. You will need to plan out how you will cover basic necessities like travel, food, clothing, etc. If you have a place to go in mind, it’s good to see what the expectations of the living arrangement will be like; rules, the amount of time you’re allowed to stay, if you’re expected to contribute financially, etc. Living on your own can also bring about many safety risks. You will need to consider ways that you can protect yourself from physical harm as well as the possibility of sexual and labor exploitation. This can all influence your decision to leave.
If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.
Stay safe,
NRS
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m 16 and hate living at home if i run away can the police force me to go back?
i am 16 years old going to run away on monday september 16 2019 i have a lot of issues on my mind that i can't handle i may even kill myself the only way for me to deal with my issues is to run away i lost my girlfriend my high school life is messed up i have a 1.1gpa i am in the 11th grade i am not going to be able to graduate i can't live like this anymore i am the dumb one in the family i always wanted to kill myself long time ago but i stayed strong but staying strong didn't help im going to be running away on monday spetwmber 16 2019 the police won't find me my parents may call them but they will never find me at 5am monday is my run away date i will leave before my family notices this is the last message that anyone will ever see here.
I Am Going To Run Away Monday September 16 2019 I Have Issues With My Home Nothing Bad Going On Between My Parents And I But Everytime im at home i feel depressed and always want to run away i lost most of the things that i wished i still do but i am mad depressed i have no where to stay or go when i run away I am going to be a homeless 16 year old runaway.Last edited by ccsmod10; 09-15-2019, 09:02 PM.Comment
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Thank you for telling us your story and reaching out. It can be difficult telling others what has happened to you.We’re not legal experts here at NRS. Generally it’s not illegal to leave home, but your parents could file a runaway report, the police could get involved, and they could bring you home. The people you’re staying with could potentially get in trouble for having you stay there if your parents file a report. You could consider calling your local nonemergency police department to ask about their policies. We also have legal aid resources here if you have specific questions about the laws in your state.
It sounds like you are thinking about harming yourself or ending your life. It takes a lot of strength to reach out for help, and we are so glad that you did. Your life has worth and our top priority is your safety. If you feel this is an emergency you could consider calling 911 for emergency assistance. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can, and we can help you find resources that can help you cope with these feelings. You do not have to face this alone, and there is so much help out there for you. If you are thinking about hurting yourself, the National Suicide Hotline could be a good resource for you. You can check them out at www.youmatter.suicidepreventionlifeline.org, or you can call 1-800-273-8255 for help and support any time. You can also call us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you need to talk.
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I plan on moving to live with my boyfriend when I’m 16 but I don’t think my mom would approve but I’d be 16 so I can do it without her consent but I’m still worried she’d call the cops and bring me home my boyfriend says they can’t do that but I’m still worried life hasn’t been the best at home I just want to move away and he’d have a good job and everything I just don’t know what my mother will doComment
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Hi there,
Thank you for reaching out to NRS. It sounds like things at home have been difficult lately and you would feel better staying with your boyfriend. Its understandable to want to leave home if it has not been a comfortable place for you.
Leaving before you turn 18 can be difficult and the easiest way is with your mom's permission. If you were to leave without your mom's permission, she can file runaway report. Running away is not a crime, but the police would likely return you home. Additionally, your mom might be able to press harboring a runaway charges against your boyfriend although these charges are rare. Most consequences for leaving home without permission would be from your mom.
We want to help you figure out your next steps and come up with a plan that you feel comfortable with. Do not hesitate to reach out by phone at 1-800-786-2929 or use our online chat services.
Take care,
NRS
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I am 15 almost 16 years old. I want to leave my house and go live with my boyfriends family for the simple fact that they have become a family to me , in my house my brother always comes home dunk or drugged and I can barely go to school because he interrupts my sleep , he hits me and my mom doesn’t do anything , my father lives in Spain , my family that lives here in New Jersey can’t take me in , can I go live with my mother in law until I am old enough to find me a place ?Comment
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Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. It sounds like you are going through quite a lot lately. You do not deserve to have your sleep interrupted due to your brother. You could consider talking to a school counselor about what has been going on. Sometimes talking with a professional can help you think of options you may have not thought of previously.
We are not legal experts but we do have general information on the laws. If you were to leave home without permission you could be considered as a runaway. If the police were to find you they most likely would bring you back home. Whoever you stay with could potentially get in trouble for harboring a runaway.
We hope this information will be helpful to you in your situation. If you have any other questions or would like to explore your options more please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and to provide support. We wish you the best of luck!
NRS
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Ok im 16 i read online that its legal to leave at 16 from your home where im at but im scared if i do leave that my parents might called the copsComment
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Hello There,
Thank you for reaching out to The National Runaway Safeline, we are here to help and here to listen. We are not legal experts but do have some knowledge on the laws. It is not illegal for you to leave home at 16 but it is a status offense. What that means is if you leave home and the police find you they most likely would bring you back home.
If you would like to talk more about what is going on or explore more options please give us a call. We are here 24/7 to listen and provide support. We wish you the best of luck!
NRS
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Hi I don’t feel safe living with my parent. she pretty much abuses me mentally and threatened to call the police if I run. Is it true that you aren’t considered a runaway unless your gone for 24 hours and can she call the cops even though I have been hurt by herComment
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Hi there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It seems there is a lot that you are faced with right now and you’re feeling like leaving is one of your only options. It seems you want to know some information on runaway laws.
While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, your parent/guardian may file you as a runaway that same day and you may be returned home. Also, those you stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.
We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
Be safe,
NRS
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I am a 16 year old girl, about to turn 17 in December. I was always causing stress to my parents because I was disobeying them, only because they are really strict on me. Ever since I was 9 I would sneak behind their backs and do things I wasn't allowed to do. For example, they never allowed me to text my friends on the phone and whenever I did, they would take the phone away. But then, I would go behind their back and take the phone and keep it until they caught me. Recently I had gotten a hold of a phone and was able to hide it for 5 months. Then I snuck out the house for the 1st time. I loved the adrenaline and so i kept doing it. My younger brother ended up finding the phone on the side of my bed and gave it to my parents. They found out everything I was doing by reading my messages on the phone. They saw I gave the address away to some of my friends and immediately flipped out. My dad started hitting me and pushing me to the floor and kicking me. My mom started screaming at me. I also did something I regretted when I snuck out one of the times ... I lost my virginity. Not because I was pressured, but because I wanted to know how I would react and feel. I was being impatient. So, when they found that out, my mom wanted to disown me. She called me all sorts of discussing names and wanted me to leave the house. She even started to send my dad a list of numbers of homes to put me in. My dad was also very upset at me. He made me take a pregnancy test and if if I was to refuse to do it, he was going to kick me out the house. I ended up not being pregnant, which I already knew. Something I should mention, is we are staying at my uncle's house for a month and now my dad has to tell my uncle what I've done. I can get in trouble with the law too. When I was on the phone I was sexting with a guy I liked. I feel so guilty and my dad said at any moment, he can report me if I do something wrong. I cant take the guilt, regret, and the pain I have from all of this. Suicide is not an option for me, so I want to run away. I have made a list of what I'll need to bring with me and possible places to stay. The thing I cant get out of my head is how I'm going to gain the confidence of leaving the house. I want to leave Florida and stay with my cousin in NY, because he doesn't communicate with my family anymore and I know for a fact i'll be safe. I know my family members will miss me, such as my siblings, aunts, uncles, and grandparents. But when they find out what I've done, they won't care that I left. Please help me with this situation !!!
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Hey there,
Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing a little bit about what’s been going on, we know that it takes a lot of courage. It must be really hard to live in a home with so much tension. It makes sense that you'd want the same kind of independence and freedom that your peers have. Running away is a big decision and it can be very stressful to figure out what you want to do.
You mentioned that you had regretted having sex because of your family's extreme reaction. We want you to know that sex is completely natural and normal and there is no shame in choosing to engage in, or abstain from sexual activity. This is an incredibly personal act and whatever you choose to do is best. As you make this personal decision you may want to check out Planned Parenthood by going to www.plannedparenthood.org for information regarding STI prevention and birth control.
You mentioned that your dad had a very violent response to your decision to have sex. His actions were not acceptable and you shouldn't have had to endure that. Absolutely no one deserves to be abused. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering. It may also be a good idea to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.
It's great that you have an ally in your cousin and feel comfortable staying with him. It’s important to consider all the possibilities that can occur if you leave home. You will need to plan out how you will cover basic necessities like travel, food, clothing, etc. It’s good to see what the expectations of the living arrangement with your cousin will be like; rules, the amount of time you’re allowed to stay, if you’re expected to contribute financially, etc. Living and especially traveling on your own can also bring about many safety risks. You will need to consider ways that you can protect yourself from physical harm as well as the possibility of sexual and labor exploitation. This can all influence your decision to leave.
If you’d like to go over what’s going on in depth, or if you’d like to explore other options that you may have available to you, please don’t hesitate to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. You can also chat us by clicking on the “CHAT” button on top of our homepage. We’re open 24/7 and here to listen and support you in any way we can.
Stay safe,
NRS
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