Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

Hey, thnx for reading this.
My name is Molly, age 12, as I'm writing this I'm a a wedding of someone I don't know. My mum and her bf do this a lot, they'll decide one morning that they're gonna go out to usually get drunk, and without asking me if I want to go, they will start packing their bags. At least 2 times per week they go out to the local pub, and Ill never know how drunk their going to be when they come back.

My dad is completely different. He owns I nice house in the countryside, all the things we do are not done unless I want to do them or we have to do them, he's gradually lowering his daily alchohol intake (last week he stopped drinking wine in the house completely), and he makes me do things I would do as an adult living by myself like doing the dishes and cooking (skills I need when I'm older).he's everything I want in my life, but my mum hates people disagreeing with her. I'll never tell her what's wrong when I'm upset because I know she'll get angry, and I'm terrified of what she'll do when I tell her I want to move in with my dad. I don't know how to tell her....

[ccsmod10]

It sounds like you're going through a difficult time with your mom, so we are glad you're reaching out to us because we are here to listen and to help. Have you talked about how you're feeling with your mom or has your dad talked about it with her for you? Having that conversation before you leave for your dad's house could help make the transition a little smoother.
If you haven't talked about it with her yet, we offer a conference call service through our hotline. We would talk with you first to discuss everything that's going on at home, and then we would call your mom and talk with her as well. After we counsel separately with both of you, we'd join the calls and a liner would be on the phone the whole time to try to keep the conversation constructive for both parties.
If you wanted to use that service, you can call us at 1-800-786-2929 or you could call us just to talk about your situation. Our hotline is 24/7 and is confidential, so we can help you talk through some options and how to approach the subject of staying with your dad to your mom.
Best of Luck

Me and my mom have been bumping heads ever since I got this job and it's breaking our bond and I feel like she don't want me here no more I feel like she needs space com me and I wanna move in with my dad ik he will take me in but I just don't know how to approach the question to her in 16 and I wanna live with my dad for ah while it's not working out at home right now she needs space and I need it to I need space from my mom's and I needa just live with my dad

[ccsmod4]

Reply: Hi, I wanna move in with my dad

Hello,
Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

It sounds like it has been a tough time for you and your mother and with living arrangements being tight you are considering moving in with your father.
It also sounds like you have a lot of concern for her and don’t want to hurt her feelings. It’s really nice that you look out for her. Good for you.
We do understand if the situation has become a lot for you to deal with.

Sometimes in life you are faced with tough situations and decisions.
You are not alone and we want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
If you would like to talk more about your situation you are welcome to contact NRS, we are here to listen and here to help.
Contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) www.1800Runaway.org (Live chat).

We hope to hear from you soon.

Take care,
NRS

Hi, I wanna move in with my dad


So I'm currently 14 and will be 15 on the 9th. And me and my mom live with her sister, we have been for a couple years now and me and her share a room. my mom and dad have been separated since I was like 4 years old. my dad lives in another state with his girlfriend and her 2 kids. but recently he told me I could move in with him if I wanted. he said I could have my own room and everything. I don't wanna live with him forever but just a year or so. but my mom is kind of unstable mentally and she doesn't have a social life or have a job or anything so she kind of relies on me, I know she'd think I was taking his side over her's if I lived with him because he hasn't really been there for me and she hates him for that. and I know it'd break her heart if I told her I wanted to move in with my dad for a whole year and left her. but I'm just so fed up living here, shes always bothering me and i have 0 privacy when i do try to get some time for myself she complains about it and trys to make me feel bad that I'm not spending time with her. I just really wanna move in with him and get out of this house. but I don't know what to do about my mom.

[ccsmod15]

Hi there,
Thanks for reaching out to us today. It sounds like you’ve been wanting to move in with your dad for a while. It would be very frustrating to keep trying to show your mom reasons you should move and to have her just ignore you.
From what you shared, it sounds like you’ve talked a bit with your mom about the schools in North Carolina, but perhaps you haven’t talked with her about all the reasons you want to go and live with your dad. One way to get our parents to talk to you about moving might be to try and intentionally sit down and have a conversation about it. Maybe that means asking your mom if you and her can plan some time to sit down and talk together, when you both have time to pay attention and focus on the conversation, or sharing some of the other reasons you want to go and live with your dad. Depending on your relationships, you might also consider whether it would be best to talk to your mom and dad together, or talking to them separately.
If you find that your parents are still not being receptive to listening to you, you might consider trying to get another person involved to help advocate for you, such as another family member or a family friend. Here at National Runaway Safeline we also offer a conference call service. If you call our hotline, we can call your mom and/or dad with you over the phone to help facilitate a conversation, offer support, and advocate for you.
Our hotline is available 24/7, and in addition to conference calls, we’re also here to talk to you about your situation and offer help and support (1-800-RUNAWAY). Good luck and we wish you all the best.

I want to move to my dads house

i been wanting to move to my dads house for a while because of the schools i hate the schools in NY and the schools are better in NC , thats where my dad lives im really frim in my decision and im not giving up what should i do to get my mom and dad to talk about me moving beacuse each time i try to show her the website on the school and all she does is just ingores me

[ccsmod4]

Reply: Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

Hello,
Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline .

We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on.
It sounds like you are trying to make a decision about which parent to live with.
That must feel like a tough one to make.
We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.

We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance.

If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

We hope to hear from you soon.

Take care,
NRS

When I was really little my mom and dad got a divorce. I've always been living with my dad and I'm not sure if I should move to my moms house. I know I won't have any friends but want to. I'll hopefully make new friends but I was hoping you could help me decide.... thanks in advanced




~a confused child

[ccsmod10]

Hey there,
Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. Please know that we are completing confidential. So anything that you share with us will stay between us.
It sounds like you and your mom living apart is needed, and it’s great you were able to get that space by moving to your dads. You mentioned that your mom wants you living back with her after the summer. Maybe your dad can contact lawyers he used when your parents were getting divorced, in order to advocate for you to stay with him. You also said that you’re able to decide where you live and who has custody over you, which is great! Unfortunately, NRS is a non-directive organization, so we aren’t here to give out advice, because you know your situation a lot better than we do. NRS does offer a conference calling service between youth and their parents. If you need more help talking to your mom about staying with your dad (long-term), we could definitely help facilitate that conversation!
Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. You are always welcome to call into our 24/7 crisis center, or use our chatting services via our website.

My parents divorced about two years ago now and my mother and I had a recent fight and she was saying 'Your not staying with me anymore, you don't talk to me, your living with your father now!' And I was like 'Okay.' In my head when I talk to her I say stuff like 'I don't like you that's why I don't talk to you. You obviously don't care about me anymore. I hate living with you. You don't understand me and if you did you'd know I'm depressed etc.' So I thought I could finally leave and live with my father. I was telling my close friends. I was so so happy for once in a long time. But today she said that I'm only living with my father for the summer and once school starts I'm moving back here. We got into another fight and I was trying to tell her 'I don't wanna live with her I want to live with my father.' She was saying things like 'So you can do nothing' I replied saying 'No I do things at dad's' 'Then why don't you do them here' in my head I said 'because I can't really bring myself to do anything here' She wants to fix our relationship and I don't trust her anymore she already lost my trust and she isn't getting it back. She was telling me 'I already had to give up your brother because I was young and dumb and I was to proud to go on heath care like everyone else in America. Your living with me.' Now I brought this up to my father a while ago that I wanna live with him and I remember that I am of age (13) to have a decision on child custody and who I wanna live with.

[ccsmod2]

re: I want to leave my dad's house

Hey there,

We can't give out advice or tell you what you should do. We recognize that it is uncomfortable for you to be at home, so you want to live with your mom. Instead of going to live with your mom, and potentially causing problems, you could try talking with her about a solution to what is happening with your dad. You may also want to be aware of the fact that you could cause your mom to get into legal trouble for letting you stay with her. It's best to seek out a legal counselor for information on custody laws.

Take care and good luck,
NRS

I want to leave my dads house

Hi, im 15 and i can not stand my father anymore. He doesn't allow me to stay home from school even if I'm sick, and doesn't allow my mom to see me at all on his day.They have 50/50 custody, but i just want to live at my moms. he continues to tell me to quit the job i have no because it is an inconvenience to him but he doesn't even drop me off or pick me up there . I just can't handle it here anymore. I don't want to hurt his feelings.I have told him that i was going to move in with my mom but he said that i was not allowed too. He always tells me about my mothers wrongs and how she is such a horrible person, and how I'm am just like her. He favors my 2 younger sisters so much and i hate it. They don't even think of me anymore. If my sister does something bad he outs it on me. Whenever i do something wrong he has to go out and tell everyone he knows. Him and my step mom put me down everyday and it gets me depressed. I also have medical issues (proven by doctors multiple time) but they just tell me I'm making it up and lying to them for attention. They won't even pay anything for me. I had to buy my own driving lessons, glasses for driving, all my clothes because they say i down need anything, and most things in my room.I just need help on what i should do...

[ccsmod6]

Hi,

Thanks so much for taking the time to reach out to us today. It sounds like you’re going through a lot at home and there’s some tension between you and your mom. Living with someone you argue with everyday definitely isn’t an ideal situation, and it’s pretty responsible of you to come to us before making any set decisions.

So, just to let you know, when you leave home before the age of 18 you would be considered a runaway. Running away is not illegal, but it is considered a status offense. This means that your parent(s) could file a runaway report against you and the police would be looking for you and would have to take you back home if they found you. Running away won’t get put on your record, and you won’t get arrested for it. If you’re seriously considering leaving home it’s best to come up with a plan for it, including where you would stay, how you would get food and money, how you would finish school, etc. You want to make sure you can survive out there on your own and that you’ll be safe.

Please don’t hesitate to reach out to us again if you need to! We want to make sure you’re safe and doing alright. You can call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY, we are 24/7 and someone will always be here to answer you and listen to what’s going on.

We wish you the best of luck!

My mom wants me to move every day she'll yell at me and when I try to talk about problems she mocks me later on about " mom you always yell me can you calm down a little please " 4 days elapsed and. She said I would say it but I don't yell and harm my feeling in a mocking tone ...... I'm done with this living situation