Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Reply: Hi, I wanna move in with my dad

    Hello,
    Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

    It sounds like it has been a tough time for you and your mother and with living arrangements being tight you are considering moving in with your father.
    It also sounds like you have a lot of concern for her and don’t want to hurt her feelings. It’s really nice that you look out for her. Good for you.
    We do understand if the situation has become a lot for you to deal with.

    Sometimes in life you are faced with tough situations and decisions.
    You are not alone and we want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time.
    If you would like to talk more about your situation you are welcome to contact NRS, we are here to listen and here to help.
    Contact us at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) www.1800Runaway.org (Live chat).

    We hope to hear from you soon.

    Take care,
    NRS

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • Me and my mom have been bumping heads ever since I got this job and it's breaking our bond and I feel like she don't want me here no more I feel like she needs space com me and I wanna move in with my dad ik he will take me in but I just don't know how to approach the question to her in 16 and I wanna live with my dad for ah while it's not working out at home right now she needs space and I need it to I need space from my mom's and I needa just live with my dad

      Comment


      • ccsmod10
        ccsmod10 commented
        Editing a comment
        It sounds like you're going through a difficult time with your mom, so we are glad you're reaching out to us because we are here to listen and to help. Have you talked about how you're feeling with your mom or has your dad talked about it with her for you? Having that conversation before you leave for your dad's house could help make the transition a little smoother.
        If you haven't talked about it with her yet, we offer a conference call service through our hotline. We would talk with you first to discuss everything that's going on at home, and then we would call your mom and talk with her as well. After we counsel separately with both of you, we'd join the calls and a liner would be on the phone the whole time to try to keep the conversation constructive for both parties.
        If you wanted to use that service, you can call us at 1-800-786-2929 or you could call us just to talk about your situation. Our hotline is 24/7 and is confidential, so we can help you talk through some options and how to approach the subject of staying with your dad to your mom.
        Best of Luck

    • Hey, thnx for reading this.
      My name is Molly, age 12, as I'm writing this I'm a a wedding of someone I don't know. My mum and her bf do this a lot, they'll decide one morning that they're gonna go out to usually get drunk, and without asking me if I want to go, they will start packing their bags. At least 2 times per week they go out to the local pub, and Ill never know how drunk their going to be when they come back.

      My dad is completely different. He owns I nice house in the countryside, all the things we do are not done unless I want to do them or we have to do them, he's gradually lowering his daily alchohol intake (last week he stopped drinking wine in the house completely), and he makes me do things I would do as an adult living by myself like doing the dishes and cooking (skills I need when I'm older).he's everything I want in my life, but my mum hates people disagreeing with her. I'll never tell her what's wrong when I'm upset because I know she'll get angry, and I'm terrified of what she'll do when I tell her I want to move in with my dad. I don't know how to tell her....

      Comment


      • ccsmod1
        ccsmod1 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello Molly,

        Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation, and we understand it takes courage to reach out for help. The National Runaway Safeline is located in the United States of America (USA). Our knowledge of helpful community based resources and our understanding of youth in crisis related laws is limited to the USA. If you are located in a country outside of the USA, you can use this link to find a youth helpline in or around your country: http://www.childhelplineinternationa...where-we-work/
        We hope that by reaching out to a local resource, you are able to get the support you need from an organization that understands the laws and circumstances that affect youth in your country.

    • when I was about 2 years old my parents got divorced and I want to live with my dad now but he just got out if prison and I wanna know if I can move in with him

      Comment


      • ccsmod10
        ccsmod10 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,

        Thanks for reaching out and sharing a bit about your situation. We’re glad you contacted us for help.

        You mentioned that your parents divorced when you were little, growing up with divorced parents can be really hard. It sounds like you’re wanting to live with your dad instead of your mom. Unfortunately, we’re not legal experts. We have heard of the courts letting the youth decide which parent they’d rather live with. It sounds like your mom is the one who was given custody over you. If she says that you can live with your dad that should be fine, or maybe you could try to stay with your dad a few nights a week? We do offer conference calling between youth and parents, if you need help talking to your mom, we can definitely help you talk with her. We also have resources for legal aid, they may be able to help you find ways to be able to live with your dad instead of mom. If you call in, we’d be happy to look for those!

        NRS is open 24/7, so we’re always a call away. If you’d like to explore those options more please don’t hesitate to reach out to us again. We’re here to help in any way we can.

        Best, NRS

    • how old do you have to be, to leave your mothers home to live with your dad if your not happy where you are with your mum.

      Comment


      • ccsmod9
        ccsmod9 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,
        Thanks for posting on our forum here at the National Runaway Safeline. We’re sorry to hear that you see to be having issues at home with mom. It sounds like there’s a lot going on.
        Unfortunately we are not legal experts. Typically you’d have to be an adult (18 years old) in the U.S to be able to choose which parent you live with. Otherwise, it is usually up to your legal guardian who has custody over you. If both parents share custody, it would be up to both of them to agree where you lived.
        We’re sorry to hear you’re not happy with your mother. If you wanted to give us a call directly, we can talk a little more about the situation. We’re available 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and can also be reached via Live Chat on this website.
        Best of luck to you,
        NRS

    • I need to leave my mom’s house.
      Hi, I’m 15 and I am extremely depressed. My mom treats me so poorly Andy she doesn’t even care. I have tried to move in with my dad before but she just shot me down. We just got into a argument and she called me a disappointment. I have cut myself many times because I’m just not happy. She doesn’t spend time with me and whenever she does it gets used against me. I just want to be happy again... please help.

      Comment


      • ccsmod6
        ccsmod6 commented
        Editing a comment
        It sounds like you’re going through a really tough time, so we’re glad you’re reaching out to us because we are here to help. If you wanted to talk to someone about what is going on, we are available 24/7 on our hotline at 1-800-786-2929. Our phone number is a great way to talk about your situation and to help you think of some options about what to do next in a more immediate way.

        If you don’t want to talk on the phone just yet, this forum post is a great first step in making a plan for yourself! You mentioned that you are extremely depressed and that you have cut yourself many times. From your post it seems like you’re going through a lot, and we have heard of other people dealing with certain situations by cutting, but we’ve also heard of other ways of coping as well. There are other methods you can try that can help you deal with some of your feelings, like journaling, creating pieces of art, or speaking about it with someone (like a friend or a trusted adult perhaps). Sometimes coping or talking through your feelings can be helpful in finding options or next steps. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to someone close to you, we know of a resource called To Write Love on Her Arms. If you text TWLOHA to 741-741, a trained counselor receives the text and responds quickly. They know a lot about self-harming and coping and might be a good resource to reach out to the next time you feel like cutting yourself.

        You also mentioned that your mom shot you down the last time you tried to move in with your dad. We are sorry to hear about that! Your dad might be a good person to tell how you feel if your mom did not take you seriously. You could then and ask him to speak to your mom on your behalf. Having your dad advocate for you could help you avoid another argument with your mom and let her know how your feeling and what makes you want to leave her house without having to do it by yourself.

        There are plenty of resources and options available to you, so if you reach out to us either by responding to this forum post, calling our hotline, sending us an email, or chatting us, we here to help 24/7. We’re confidential and here to help.

        Best of Luck

    • I want to leave my dads house.

      My dad and stepmom love my stepsister more than me and im tired of it. they find the stupidest reasons to ground me so i dont get anything good. They have called me a disrespectful little ********** multiple times and im done. I and currently grounded because while being grounded for having one bad grade i had an extra phone to do my streaks and text people. I just want to move in with my mom although she is not the best mother and is battling alcoholism i would rather lives with someone who wants me for who i am not the perfect person my dad and stepmom expect me to be. PLEASE HELP ME. i dont know how to switch over or how to approach my dad about this my dad currently lives in SC and mom lives in NC.

      Comment


      • ccsmod16
        ccsmod16 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello, thanks for reaching out. It shows incredible strength to reach out and talk about the way you are feeling. We are so sorry to hear you feel your dad and stepmom do not love you and only love your stepsister.

        It is understandable that you are upset and wanting to live with your mom. A couple of things to keep in mind: how old are you? In both NC and SC, the legal age of adulthood is 18. If you are under 18, then who has custody of you? If your dad has sole custody, then living with your mom would mean she would need to go to court and get custody of you. That may be tough if she is struggling with alcoholism as you said. If your parents share custody, it may be a little easier for you to stay with your mom, then.

        It sounds like a really tough situation to get grounded and not be able to talk to friends or keep up with your streaks. We are so sorry to hear your dad and stepmom call you names. You do not deserve to be spoken to that way. If you feel there is any abuse (verbal, physical, sexual, neglect) going on, you always have the right to report it. Child Help (the national child abuse hotline) can help with that and help answer what may constitute as abuse if you need more information. You can reach them at 1-800-422-4453 and childhelp.org.

        You also mentioned your mom struggles with alcoholism. This is a really tough situation for you as a youth to handle as well. There is a program called Al-a-teen that is for teenagers who are loved ones of alcoholics: https://al-anon.org/newcomers/teen-corner-alateen/. They have online resources, a chat service, and you can also find a meeting in your area here: https://al-anon.org/al-anon-meetings...ateen-meeting/.

        If you wanted help talking to your dad about possibly living with your mom or with another family member (like an aunt, uncle, grandparent, friend), we do offer conference calling as well between you and your parents. You can call us anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY and we can do a conference call, talk more about your situation, find additional resources, and consider more options for you.

        Thank you again for posting today! You are really brave and strong for asking for help and handling so much stress on your own already. We are here 24/7 by phone and also by chat on our website. Take care and contact us anytime!

    • I am in a really difficult situation. My dad just moved to Florida and I live with my mom. I am 13 and i am having mixed emotions on where I want to live. My mom and I have been fighting for a week already and I don’t know what to do. I told her that I would like to live with him because I miss him and because we are fighting so much. She keeps on yelling at me because I wrote her a note saying that i want to live with him because I am scared of telling her myself. I don’t know what to do? Help me please!

      Comment


      • ccsmod15
        ccsmod15 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,

        Thanks for taking the time to send us a message. We want to commend you for coming forward about your situation. If you call us at 1-800-786-2929, we can provide emotional support for you during this difficult situation. We also can help facilitate a conference call between you and your mother if you would like a non-judgmental space to talk to her in. We can definitely help you find legal resources too in order to help you discover what your options are. Unfortunately, we are not legal experts, so we would not be able to tell you what your options are legally.

        Hopefully this was helpful. We again thank you for reaching out, and invite you to contact us again. We are staffed 24/7, so we can help whenever you need it. In the meantime, best of luck.

        -NRS

    • I’m in the same predicament. I’m 14 and my sister is 16. She moved back in with us about 2 months ago and ever since then my mom has called us trashy, pathetic, losers and all the other names in the book. She smacks us around and makes us do all the chores cook clean and if we don’t do it to her specifications we get yelled at. I asked her to move out and she yelled at me. She took all of our electionics away and we aren’t allowed to watch tv or listen to the radio or go anywhere besides school and then go right home. What do I do? I talked to my dad and he said go to the school counselor and she said write a letter to the friend of the court. Around 2 years ago mine and my sister called cps and she told them we were pathological liars and they dismissed the case. What do I do?

      Comment


      • ccsmod0
        ccsmod0 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello, Thank you for taking the time to write to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you and your sister are in a difficult situation and are looking for some options. We want you to know that neither of you deserve to be treated the way that you are being treated. We also want you to know that you have the right to report what you have been experiencing again. We understand that you have made a report with CPS and things did not go the way that you wanted but you can always follow up with someone at http://justiceforchildren.org/ Justice for Children’s Call Center helps when the child protection system fails to protect a child. They offer information, guidance and assistance for youth in need.
        It is great that your dad is on your side and giving you some helpful tips. Going to a counselor at school sounds like a great plan. The more adults you have on your side the better. It also helps to have someone to talk to about what is going on. Being able to talk to someone about what you are experiencing might help you brain storm other options not previously thought of. You can always contact us as well. We cannot tell you what to do but we can talk to you about all of your options. If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.
        We want you to know that you are not alone and we care about you. Please feel free to give us a call anytime. 1-800-786-2929
        Best,
        NRS

    • Moving in with Dad, Mom is CRAZY!!!

      so, as a 10 year old writing this, you can tell that’s how dire my situation is getting. My mother is being absolutely ridiculous to me, my 17 year old brother, and my 2 year old sister.
      often, she has kicked us out of the house(not me yet, but my 17 and 19 year old brother and sister while younger.)
      she has occasionally gotten mad at one of us, and taken away our FOOD privileges.

      my 19 year old sister cannot afford a college tuition, so she decides to stay with our grandma, as my mother has driven her out of the house.

      she puts way too much stress on me. She has me cook for us, do laundry, clean the entire house, watch my 2 year old sister, once, I even had to walk home in the pouring rain. I also constantly have to vacuum her car, Do dishes, and I set up and decorate the Christmas tree with only my brother. And he put on what, 2 ornaments?
      actually, just yesterday I cleaned off an entire shelf, because my mother is in debt 10,000$ to the state of Indiana, because she lost a mic-key, or what ever the pump thing for people who can’t eat normally. My life is miserable and when I move in with my dad, I really never want to come back. And, as a 10 year old, I’ve done as much research as I can. And is it true I have to visit my mom? Oh and, There is maybe 10 minutes for me to write this, so I’m trying my hardest to hurry.

      my actual, real, reason for writing this, is because when I move in with my dad, I want to know if I can revoke, or change, my mothers visitation rights. Once I move in there, I’d never like to come back, unless it’s visiting my boyfriend(yes I’m gay) or something inportant like a funeral.

      please reply ASAP, as I’m moving in with my dad in about 4 months.

      Comment


      • ccsmod16
        ccsmod16 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi,

        Thank you so much for reaching out, it took a lot of courage to do that. It sounds like things are really hard at home right now for you and your siblings. You all don’t deserve to be treated that way. You deserve a safe home and to always have access to food and other necessities. In situations like this it can help to talk to a friend, a teacher/school counselor, a relative, or another trustworthy person. You sound really responsible and are handling a tough situation with a great maturity. It’s awesome that you have your boyfriend, siblings, and dad to help support you right now.

        Withholding food can be considered neglect and you do have the right to file an abuse report against your mother. If you want to file an abuse report we can help with that if you give us a call or chat with us. The national child abuse hotline, Child Help 800-422-4453 can take the report. Reporting may lead to your mother having her custody rights revoked. As far as visitation is concerned we aren’t legal experts here, we can try to help you find legal resources in your area if you call or chat with us to make sure you get the correct information.

        Thank you again for reaching out. We are here 24/7 to listen and support you. Please don’t hesitate to call us at 800-786-2929 or chat with us if you would like to further discuss your options. Good luck with everything!

    • I just want to live with my grandparents

      Hey, I'm 16 years old, a sophomore student and I'm currently undergoing conflict within my household between myself and my mom and stepdad. I came in yesterday after school with new shoes my grandma bought me and the first thing my mom says to me when I walk in is "oh new shoes? do u ask for new shoes everytime you go over there now?" She says that about everything, hats, shirts, headphones. The thing is though, my dad pays her a lot for child support, but she barely provides me with those. With this in mind, I replied back" Don't worry about it." This might sound rude but it isn't the first time y'know. Plus, I just got home. The last thing I wanted was a quiz. So we got into a huge argument, saying my selfish, disrespectful, and that they didn't need me and would do fine without me. Then, they asked me what I wanted and I said to move away. So right now, they are trying to contact my dad who moved to Amsterdam, Netherlands just last Summer to see if he can take me in. But, I want to live with my grandparents who live like an hour away walking, 10 mins by drive. Also, the school there is so close and is across the street from Safeway, and I really wanted to work there. Only problem is right now is they need to talk to the courts and make everything official. What do I do with my time right now? I've spent the last few days performing physical labor and they didn't make me dinner yesterday, and today. Any advice or ways to get me out of here NOW!?

      Comment


      • ccsmod10
        ccsmod10 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hello,

        Thank you for reaching out to us for help. It sounds like you are going through a very difficult time right now, and we are sorry to hear that your being put in this situation. That must be really stressful. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can.

        It sounds like your mom is very hard on you and doesn’t give you the support she should be giving. We’re glad to hear that you’re in the process of going to live with your grandparents. It’s understandable that you’re not wanting to stay in the home while the legal processes are going on. If your mom is okay with you going to live with your grandparents before the courts make it official, that is legal. If your father has legal custody over you, he could also give you permission. We are not here to tell you what to do, because you know your situation best, but we can help by talking about options available to you specific to your life and your current situation.

        Lastly, we offer conference calling between youth and parents. If you wanted our help, talking to your mom about going to live with your grandparents, we can make that call together.

        We thank you again for posting your story to our online forum. We are here 24/7, and our line is confidential. We also have a chat option available through our website. Please call or chat us if you would like to talk further. We are here to listen and here to help.


        Best of luck,
        NRS

    • Hi. I’m 15, and am currently a sophomore in highschool. I have two older siblings that have moved out, and I really want to move in with my dad. He shares joint custody with my mom, but I’m with my mom most of the time. I try to do so much to say lease her but nothing ever works. My sister can never do anything wrong; my mom would be proud of her for weeks after she did something. I, on the other hand, get praise for five minutes and then she goes on to talk about how I don’t eat healthy and don’t excersise enough, even when I am trying my best to eat healthy and make do with what random small amounts of food we have. My dad isn’t the father to my older siblings, just me, and I wish I got to see him more than I do. I see him every other weekend and Wednesday and those are my favorite days. He treats me with respect, doesn’t ever yell at me or make me cry if I make a small mistake, and I feel like he is more stable than my mom. My mom will constantly say how if I need something, just ask, but then the second I ask if she can pick up some shampoo or something, she will go on and on about how money is tight when she buys herself stuff frequently. I know she loves me, and I can just never pin her down. The second I think I’ve got her figured out, she expects more and more. I just need a calmer and less stressful environment because I’m afraid to even tell her I think I have bad anxiety because I know she will rant about doctor bills after I’ve already had lots of heart problems. She says if I need something, to tell her, but she’s never in a good enough mood for me to even bring it up, and I feel like she would take it as an insult. I don’t know how to even tell my mom or Dad or if I even should. I don’t know if it’s even legally allowed, I just know I’d feel better at my dad’s.

      Comment


      • Hi there,

        Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We are here 24/7 to listen and to support.

        It sounds like you are in a tough situation at home. Have you talked to your dad about your situation and what he thinks? We have a conference call service here at NRS where a liner could mediate a conversation between you and your mom or with both your mom and dad where you could voice your concerns and hopefully come to some resolutions together. If you are interested in that or just want someone to go through your options with you and help figure out what you think would be best for you to do, you can reach us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We want you to know that it's a big first step reaching out and that there are people here to support you. A liner could also find counseling services for youth in your area that could be possibly more affordable.

        Let us know how we can best help,

        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • I want to choose between going to my mom's and dad's house.

          I am 15 and my family life can be hard. My mom and I get along great almost all of the time, but at my dad's it's really bad. My family is divorced. I had a fight with him today. He got mad because I said I didn't want to go to taekwondo. I had a black stain on my white uniform and it is a sign of disrespect to wear the uniform stained. I don't have any pants expect one pair of jeans at his house and I couldn't do Taekwondo is jeans. It started off as an argument but quickly progressed. He yelled at me for being unprepared (which is fair), but I didn't think we were going because he had been late (he is almost always late). I told him that I wasn't going no matter what, again he got even more mad at my non-compliance. He ran up the stairs towards me and raised his hand. He scared me and when I told him he just laughed. he has told me in an earlier fight that the child should be afraid of the parent. I don't feel it's healthy. He then gave up after the argument got more heated and started throwing things around. He had been a boxer and karate person ever since he was a kid. He is older now, but still strong. He scares me sometimes and puts a lot of pressure on me as a kid. He expects me to watch my brother, pick him up from the bus, make dinner for everyone, clean, shovel, and other work, but sometimes it gets too much. It's like I am a second mother. I am taking AP classes and just need a break from the drama. Both my parents have custody over me and I'm not asking for much, just to be able to leave the house when my dad get into his super anger phase. I will learn to balance both family and school in time. I just need to be gone for the times that I can't hand him anymore. Is there a way I could leave the house without getting in legal trouble?

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi,
            Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like being at your dad’s house can be a scary and overwhelming situation at times, and it’s completely understandable that you would want to get out of there when your father is in his “super anger phase.” It’s unfair that your father puts so much pressure on you to take care of the family. You deserve the time to prepare for your classes and enjoy your life sometimes. Those are completely reasonable expectations to have, and you sound like an incredibly mature, thoughtful, and resilient person.
            First, we’re not legal experts, but if your father is intimidating and threatening you, this may qualify as abuse. If you ever feel like you’re in immediate danger, you can always call 9-1-1. Another resource that you might consider is the National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-422-4453.
            It sounds like you need to get out of your dad’s house when he’s angry. This is very reasonable. Generally speaking, when you leave home without permission, your parents would have the right to file a runaway report. However, if you’re only planning on leaving for a few hours while things blow over, perhaps you might consider letting your dad know so that he doesn’t file that report. That being said, if your father does file a runaway report, there would not be any legal trouble or consequences for you. The police would simply return you home. At that time, you might consider letting the police know what’s been going on as it can be helpful to have these situations documented on paper. If at any point you feel unsafe, it is completely valid to leave that situation and you never deserve to be threatened. You deserve to feel safe with your father.
            You mentioned that your parents are divorced. Another option might be to talk to your mom about your concerns and let her know that you don’t feel comfortable seeing your dad (if that’s the case). If your mom would be willing to pursue full custody of you with no visits to your dad, that might also be an option.
            If you want to talk about the situation more specifically, please feel free to reach out to us 24/7. Best of luck to you and stay strong.

        • I have a similar problem! My mother and father haven't been together for about 6/7 years, but they do not have a divorce. I absolute do not like to live with my mother. She can get very mad at times over little things. My mother is very judgmental too. I have been whipped by belts or paddles. She has popped my blood vessels twice. I have been deciding if I should move in with my father. One time over thanksgiving break I told her I would like to live with my father, and she threw my stuff out the window going down the highway. Another reason I would like to move in with my father is because he doesn't judge me about my past mistakes. My mother throws my past mistakes in my face and it hurts a lot. She also judges me because I liked a boy who was a different skin color. Also my uncle who is more like brother to me due to our ages and how close we are, told me that my mom said if I ever got pregnant I would be disowned from the family. My mother can get very mean with her words. I'm going to be 16 in two days, so I was decided about moving in with him next Monday. I'm scared of how she will react. She might not let me leave. I've talked about this with a couple of my friends and they all agree that I should leave my mother's house. But recently I found out from my father that my mother has threaten him about me moving in with him. He told me that she said if I moved in with him then she would keep my sister away from me and my father and I would be dead to her. And I love my sister a lot. And I love my mother even though she is very mean and judgmental. I don't want to hurt her but I cannot live with her anymore. I know if I leave, my grandparents and uncles would never disown me from the family. So this was my plan on telling her. Monday afternoon I would have my stuff packed and have it loaded in my grandmother's car. And have my father be here when my mother gets home from work. Then I would tell her I would like to move in with my father and that I love her very much but I don't think it's best for me to live here. I'm scared about this but I have been thinking about it and I want to live with my father. Any suggestions on how I should tell her a better way?


          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thanks so much for reaching out to us. We recognize that it can be very difficult to talk to people on the internet about situations you’re struggling with. We hope our message is helpful.

            It makes sense that you wouldn’t want to be around your mom if she has injured you and if she has been so mean to you with her words. We want to let you know that your mother should not be hitting you or making you feel so uncomfortable using her words, and that no matter what you have or have not done, you don’t deserve to be treated that way. You deserve to be in a safe and comfortable home and to be cared for. We are always available, 24/7, to talk to you about these experiences involving your mom, and to provide you resources (1-800-786-2929, [email protected]). You might also find ChildHelp, the national child abuse hotline, helpful (1-800-422-4453). Both NRS and ChildHelp are able to file abuse reports with you, as well, in case you ever want to file against your mother.

            You mention that you are interested in bettering your explanation for leaving home to your mom. It seems wise to mention that you want to move out because you feel like her home is not the best for you. You may want to be prepared to explain why that is if she asks for a more detailed explanation. You may wish to mention that she has injured you and said really horrible things to you, and explain that her actions are hurting you. Because your mother has hit you before, we suggest having a trusted adult nearby during the conversation to protect you from your mother if she becomes violent. If your grandmother is letting you use her car when you leave, she may be able to diffuse any tension or conflict that may arise. Your father may also be able to diffuse tension. You know your family dynamics better than we do, however, so ultimately the choice of which adult is present when you leave home is entirely up to you.

            Hopefully this message was helpful. We invite you to call us if you need resources, if you want someone to listen to your story, or if you need resources. In the meantime, best of luck.

            -NRS
        Previously entered content was automatically saved. Restore or Discard.
        Auto-Saved
        x
        Insert: Thumbnail Small Medium Large Fullsize Remove  
        x
        x
        Working...
        X