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Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Re: Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

    My mom has always been very minipulative, and my parents divorced when i was around 4 years old. She agreed to a set child support that my dad would pay and applied for joint custody. When they appeared in court, she then asked for WAY more than the agreed amount and applied for sole custody. im using this to prove how selfish and deceiving she can be. My dad cannot stand her one bit. There many instances (that i wont get into) that prove how mean and hurtful she is. she is physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive, and hes left the physical scars to prove it. im almost 16 years of age, and i have been sexaully active in the past, and have sent explicit pictures, (mind you, this is in the past) when she found out, she took my phone understandably, but the consequences were bad. she never in my entire life has let me leave the house unless it was with her after i come home from school. not allowed to hang out with friends, and she is very irresposible. theres so many details i could go into, like her getting drunk and on pills and losing her phone, so stealing my 500 dollar phone and using it even thought she didnt buy it. anyways, im moving in with my dad over the summer (consensually)but me and my dad plan to keep me there. im afraid that if i bring it up, she will get physcial and try to stop me from leaving. what should i do?

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  • ccsmod1
    replied
    RE: I want to move in with my dad

    Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you and your brother are in a tough situation and you would rather live with your dad. That sounds very difficult. It sounds like your parents have worked out a custody agreement where youa re supposed to live with your mom, and your dad already tried to change custody and failed. That is a very difficult situation. If you and your brother run away to live with your dad, your mom can call the police and report you as runaways. Your dad could get into trouble for harboring a runaway or violating a custody agreement. You and your brother could be forced to go back home to your mom in Oregon. If your dad wants to regain custody, he would have to go back to his lawyer and try to win custody in court or come to some kind of agreement with your mom. That is a very difficult situation to be in. We are sorry to hear that you and your brother are feeling depressed and having a tough time at school. That sounds very difficult and painful. We are here to listen and support you in any way that we can. You can call us any time to talk through your situation and talk about some options. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon, and wish you the best of luck.

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I want to move in with my dad

    Hello I am 15 years old and will be 16 this summer and my brother will be 17 this summer. We currently live with our mother in Oregon and we want to live with our dad in South Carolina. We just moved to Oregon with her last summer. And we also live with her fiancé and we don't get along with either of them and are very depressed and it is effecting our school work. We told our dad and he went to his lawyer and my mom almost made it impossible for him to get custody of us and he can't really afford it either. We even talked to her about it but she is planning on getting married soon and it will cost a lot of money and she said she doesn't want to pay child support so she said we can't move. We went to our counselor at school and she said she really couldn't do much but she would try. This summer we are going to visit family in Michigan and we are supposed to come back to Oregon right before school starts but we're not going to go back. And we want to try to have our dad get custody of us before the summer ends so we don't have to run away. What advice can you give us so our dad can get custody of us fast?

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  • ccsmod16
    replied
    Re: Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

    Hello,

    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline and sharing with us some of your story. It must be hard to go back and forth between your parents. It sounds like it hasn’t been really stable for you over the years and having kids at school talk about something that is difficult for you to relate to must be hard. We are glad that you have reached out to us and we are here to support you in what way we can.

    It sounds like your parents divorcing and having to go back and forth between them has been difficult for you. We would like to support you in the best way that we can. It may help to talk to someone about what you are feeling regarding your situation. If you call us we can look up support groups and counseling centers for you to attend in order to talk about how this is effecting you. In addition, seeing if there is someone you trust you can talk to about this.

    We hoped this helped and if you would like to discuss your situation in greater detail please give us a call on our hotline at 1800-RUNAWAY or chat with us on our website. We wish you the best of luck and look forward to hearing from you.

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Living with my dad

    When I was young my dad left me for his wife i was around 3-4 but I was young my mom did her best to raise me by her self I didn't understand at first kid's at school talked about there dads. When I was about 7 he came back am in custody of my mom.I was 9 my mom and I got in a bad fight with her she droped me off at my dads work he had a roommate he picked me up he dropped me at my dads house I lived there for 8 moths I finally visited her now am 14 about to be 15

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  • ccsmod10
    replied
    Re: Moms house to dads house

    Hello There!

    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. It is a great first step to finding the help and information that you need. It sounds like you are in a difficult situation and are unhappy living with your mother and stepfather. We are not legal experts here, but typically in most states 18 is considered to be an adult. In this case you would not need permission to leave home. Going to college or finishing school has no effect on being able to move out nor is going to college mandatory, although this is a great thing to do for a brighter future. Leaving prior to being 18 is where you would need permission to leave home in anyway.

    You mentioned threatening suicide and cutting. These are very serious and permanent decisions to make. Both of these options would not only hurt your loved ones, but it hurts you first and foremost. Reaching out to family, freinds, teachers, to lean on when things get difficult can be a way of coping as well. If you ever need someone to talk to or feel like self-harming you can always call us at 1800-RUNAWAY or National Suicide Hotline at 1800-273-TALK

    We hope this was helpful,
    Stay Safe. Stay Strong,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Moms house to dads house

    I am 16 currently, but once I turn 18 i can legally choose where I want to live right? I want to go live with my dad. My mom says that I'm not allowed to move out until I have finished my 4 years of college. But I can't stand living in this horrible house any longer. My stepfather is sexist. My mom can't stand up for herself or me and my sisters. I've threatened suicide and I've even cut a few times. My mom's house is not a good place for me to live. I can not stand to live there until I'm 21. I can barely stand it now for the past 3 years that they have been married. What can I do? What are my legal options?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    replied
    Re: Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

    Thank you for using our bulletin service.

    Arguing with your mom all the time sounds like a super stressful home life. We are sorry that you do not like your dad and cannot turn to him. It sounds like you have already made up your mind about leaving home. One thing to consider is how your sister would feel if you did leave? We encourage you to continue looking into the situation, making sure you know as much as possible about the safety of where you are staying, what you will do for money, whether you will be able to continue your education, etc.
    We are not here to tell you what to do but we are here to try to provide you with support and resources so that if you do decide to leave home, you are doing it intelligently and safely. We here at NRS have a database of resources at our disposal, which allows us to search for shelters, counselors, and other options. If you want, we can access those resources and provide you with some referrals just give us a call.

    Feel free to give us a call anytime at 1-800 RUNAWAY

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Re: Moving out of my mom's house to my father's house

    Im 14 years old and i can't leave with my mom anymore. Is like every day im fighting with her and i can't take it anymore,and Im not going to my dad house because I
    never like him as a person so that's out of the picture. I just REALLY need HELP on what to do. Im only staying because of my sister,i already have a bag pack with
    some of my stuff and im thinking about leaving my mom house when we get in another fight. So anyone have an ideal or something.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    replied
    I want to live with my dad

    Hello,
    Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

    It sounds like you have become unhappy with living at home with your mother and would like to stay with your father.
    It can be tough when there are issues such as yours so we understand you might be frustrated.
    It took a lot of courage to reach out for help. Good for you.
    We would like to know how we might be of help to you.

    Give us a call at our 24 hr. crisis line 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or chat with us at www.1800Runawy.org.
    Hearing more about your situation we then explore some options with you.
    Does that make sense?
    We appreciate your strength and hope to hear from you soon.

    Take Care,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I want to live with my dad

    I'm 12 and my mum and dad have been split for a long time they two day after my birth so I don't rember I go to my dads evey weekend and then back to my mum in the week I want to live with my dad because he cares about me and my mum don't she cares about my 2 sister and its my fault that my sister got Asmara and I hate her to bits help me

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  • ccsmod7
    replied
    Re: from dad's to moms

    Hi there,

    Thank you for contacting us through our online forum. It sounds like you’re going through a lot at home. No one has the right to call you names. Often times verbal abuse can be just as hurtful as physical abuse. If you are unsure whether any of your dad’s behavior would be considered abuse, the organization Child Help USA might be able to talk about that with you in more detail: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. You can reach them at 1-800-422-4453 if you have more questions about reporting.

    It’s great that you find your mom to be supportive and that she’s doing what she can on her part to limit the time that you are with your dad. If your mom is able to have more custody rights over you and your siblings, that might be a good route to go. We can look up low cost legal resources if you or your mom wanted to speak with a legal expert. You would just need to contact us directly so that we can look that up for you.

    It’s understandable that you would be really frustrated with this living arrangement and confused by your dad’s actions, especially with your dad often times not picking you up from your mom’s home. We’re glad that you thought to reach out to us and hope that some of these ideas are helpful. If you would like to keep talking about your situation in more detail, we would be happy to discuss with you potential options.

    Best of luck,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    from dad's to moms

    I live with my dad. I'm 14 years old I will be 15 in may. I'm tired of living here.. I have wanted to move out for the past 3 years. I go to my moms every Friday. My dad is supposed to come pick me up in Sundays at my moms house. But that never happens anymore. We've never really been physically or sexually abused. But he will call us names such as "*******" "mistakes" etc. I don't know who to talk to. I want to live without my mom I can't take it anymore. Could you tell me who I should talk to? I've told my mom and she wants to take him to court bht since he's never really done anything "illegal" or "abusive" to any of us (meaning me my 2 half sisters and his girlfriend's 3 kids) we have 8 people in this house. But I just can't take it anymore I'm miserable do please help😭😭😭😭😭😭
    Last edited by ccsmod7; 03-14-2016, 07:58 PM.

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  • ccsmod5
    replied
    Re: confused

    Hey there,

    Thank you for being able to reach out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are considering your options and trying to see what is best for your situation. We are glad we are a resource that comes to mind in this time of crisis. We want you to know that we are here to listen and to help in the best way that we can. It also seems like there is a lot going on in your life, if you are able to give us a call or chat with us we would be able to explore your situation a little further with you.

    Our lines are available 24/7, this is the fastest method you would be able to get in touch with us. We are more than willing to listen to your situation and help in the best way that we can. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), we also have a live chat program, it seems like that would work best since you are unable to get to a phone. As we mentioned, we would be more than happy to talk about your situation and see what the best way that we can help you is. We wish you the best of luck and hope to get your call or chat soon.

    Stay strong,

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    confused

    Hi I'm a sophmore in high school and I just can't take living with my mom anymore. I think I'm starting to have depression I want to go live with my dad but I don't know how to exactly tell my mom. Help?

    Leave a comment:

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