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Can I legally runaway to my dad's?

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  • ccsmod5
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thanks for reaching out and sharing a bit of what has been going on at home. It sounds pretty frustrating not being able to see your dad and deal with the environment at home with your mom. When it comes to court orders, your dad is able to request a copy of the court orders (which would include custody and visitation orders) to the court itself. He also probably has either his own lawyer or a state assigned representative, they would have a copy of the court orders as well. If visitations are required, your mom could get into trouble for not following through with them. It would be a pretty good idea for your dad to connect with their lawyer soon.

    You mentioned that your mom has verbally/emotionally abused you before, you can report this as abuse. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. Unfortunately, emotional abuse is often harder to provide evidence for compared to physical abuse which is often what CPS relies on when conducting an abuse investigation. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at 1-800-422-4453 or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made.

    We hope this helps, please contact us via chat or phone call if you would like to talk in more detail. We are here to support you!

    Stay strong,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Help!

    My mom has full custody over me. She has lied to my dad about his visitation rights, and won't even let me go every other weekend. She refuses to even give him a copy of the divorce and custody papers. My mom is very verbally abuses, she throws everything that happens to me back in my face and I can't take it anymore. She has pushed me past my point. I really want to live with my dad, and she won't let me. I'm only 15. What can I do?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there, and thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step.

    It sounds like things have between pretty tough with you and your mother lately, and we're sorry to hear that. While we can't tell you what you should do, we're happy to throw out a few options that you think through. One thing we like to encourage young people to do when having issues at home and who are thinking about running away is to consider how you'd respond to a similar situation once you're out of the house. So for you, it might be worthwhile to think about how you'd work through a situation with your dad if it resulted in you arguing for a couple of days. How would you navigate that? It's likely that dad's house will also have rules and expectations, and there will be times when you two bump heads. If your first instinct is to leave or otherwise remove yourself from that situation, it's probably a good idea to focus on ways that you can work through the tough times that you're experiencing rather than leaving when they occur. This can be challenging to do, but it's an important part of growing up. If you decide to go this route, it can be helpful to have someone supportive to talk to, like a therapist or a social worker. A good starting point in getting connected with someone is to reach out to a teacher or directly to your school counselor or social worker who can both provide support, and connect you with someone else who can as well.

    As far as running away in general, it's usually a good idea to have a plan in place. Consider where you'll go, how you'll get there, and what you'll do to survive once you're there. It's great that your dad is an option, but if your mom has primary custody of you, it's important to know that it can also be a pretty complex situation that could result in your dad facing legal consequences for harboring a runaway. Each state has their own laws in place around this, but it's a good idea to be aware of them (and make sure dad is also aware of them), before making that decision.

    If you'd like to chat in more detail about what's going on between you and mom, continue to explore your options with us, or otherwise just have a supportive person to talk to, please feel free to reach out to us directly by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or by chatting with us live through our website at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

    Best of luck.

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I need help,I want to go live with my dad but my mother will not let me and we have been arguing for a couple days now and I'm starting to feel like I want to runaway to his house,,I am 15 and I need to know what should I do?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello there,
    Thanks for reaching out! It sounds like a lot is going on at home. You do not deserve to be treated the way your step dad is treating you. We are not legal experts, but your dad would need legal custody of you in order for you to move in with him without your mom's permission. We can talk about this further is you would like to call us at 1800-RUNAWAY or chat with us at www.1800RUNAWAY.org. We are here to help and listen. You are not alone in this.
    Stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Right now I leave at my mom's with my mom and my step dad, I am currently 14 years old and I am having a tough time living here. My step dad is always trying to argue with us about everything and he makes us do a lot of chores. He always picks on me and makes fun of me . My stepdad once wanted to fight me. I wish to move to my real dad's house but don't know how to do it without getting into trouble. Is there a way I can move to my dad's legally?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod8
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    Thank you for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline! It can take a lot of strength to reach out for help, and we’re really glad you did. It sounds like there’s a lot going on at home right now with your relationships with your mom and dad. Hopefully we can help in any way that we can.

    It can be hard to talk to someone about your feelings and thoughts with someone and it takes a lot of trust as well. But one postive outcome might be that you and this person can be on the same page and really connect on the issue. It might be heplful to do this with your father. Sharing with him some of the information you shared with us may be helpful for him to understand how you’re feeling right now. While it is not illegal for you to run away, if you aren’t yet 18 in most states your mom could call the police and file a runaway report. You mentioned that your mom took your dad to court over custody as well. If he already as legal representation it might be helpful for him to reach out and ask him what his rights are and if he is able to do anything to stop your mother from treating you this way. If he doesn't, we might have a few resources in our database that can be helpful. If you’d like explore that option, you can give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

    You mentioned that your mom is physical that sometimes you feel scared. You don’t deserve to be treated that way, and your safety is a priority to us. If you’d like more information on child abuse or reporting, you can visit childhelp.org or call 1-800-422-4453.

    Again, thank you so much for reaching out to the NRS! It’s great to see you’re taking steps to keep yourself safe. We’re always here 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY, or you can chat with us on our website. Best of luck!
    Last edited by ccsmod8; 12-31-2020, 12:58 PM.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hello.. im currently with my mother and my parents have been split since my birth, and over the years I can see why. My mother isn't very mentally stable and makes up crazy stories half of the time always making her the victim.. she also tends to do the same to me as I try my best to steer clear from her drama, but always in the end of the day im always telling myself horrible things from everything she says to me, she is physical aswell and sometimes im scared to be home, I've tried staying at my dads house when I visited him and refused to leave but my mother then took him to custody and the judge didn't even let me speak and explain why, and forced me back, im done with no one listening and I plan to run away to my fathers to escape my mother.. I have to inform him but im just worried about getting him in trouble about my decisions
    Is running away illegal? How old do I have to be before I leave home? What is emancipation? We can address these legal questions and more about runaway and homeless youth on this board.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there. Thanks for reaching out to us here at NRS. We know that it can take a lot of courage to reach out for support, and we're glad you took that step. Unfortunately without more information, this isn't a question we can answer at the moment. Knowing who has legal custody of you and what your parents might (or have already) agreed to in terms of your care is important information for us to know. That said, if you're considering running from your dad's house to your mom's, a good starting point would be to connect with your parents. See what they think, and if they'll agree to you staying with your mom. Communication is important, so opening that door with a conversation might be beneficial to you.

    If you'd like to chat in more detail about your particular situation and what options might be available to you, please feel free to reach out to us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or through our live chat at www.1800runaway.org. We're available 24/7 and are always happy to listen, and to help.

    Take care.

    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    If I run away from my dads house to my moms dosent still count as running away

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi! Thank you for reaching out to speak about what is going on. It sounds like you are living in a very difficult situation, and you are brave for reaching out for help. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect, and you do not deserve the treatment that you have been receiving. We want to help you come up with a plan that ensures your safety.



    You have the right to report abuse that you are experiencing to child protective services. If the abuse you are experiencing is found to be dangerous, it is likely that you would be removed from the home. We are not legal experts, but we want to let you know there is a possibility that your guardians could get in trouble if you choose to file an abuse report. If you would like more information about abuse reporting and the process for your state, a great resource is Child Help: (800) 422-4453.



    In order to legally go and live with your father, you would need permission from your guardians. If you choose to leave without permission, it is considered running away. Running away is not a criminal offense, which means that you would not receive criminal charges. If you run away, your guardians could choose to file a runaway report. This means that if the police know you are at your dad’s house, there is a chance that they could come and take you back to your legal guardians. Although we cannot definitively say what will happen, there is also the possibility that you father could be charged with the crime of harboring a runaway.



    You deserve to feel safe and cared for, and we hope that we can help you reach that point. If you would like to talk more about your situation or need more help, feel free to reach out to us through our online chat feature or call us at 1-800-786-2929. We are available 24/7 to listen and help.

    Be well!

  • ccsmod6
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,



    Thanks so much for reaching out to NRS. We're sorry to hear it sounds like you are not being treated well at home. We want to help you ensure your safety.



    While we are not legal experts, we have a great deal of legal experience when it comes to runaways. It is not illegal to run away, however, there are laws about harboring a runaway that vary state to state. If you disclose to the police that there is abuse at home, they may be willing to work with you.



    Another option to consider is making an abuse report. If you call or chat us, we can help you make the call or even make the call on your behalf.



    Lastly, please consider calling ChildHelp at 800-422-4453. They have a hotline with counselors who can help you make a safety plan so you can protect yourself at home.



    Please give us a call at 1800-RUNAWAY or a chat at 1800runaway.org so we can help discuss your options. We are available 24/7.



    Best of luck and we hope to hear from you soon.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 15 and I ran away from my guardians to my dad's because I don't want to be with them anymore. I'm tired of being treated like a slave and the abuse. What can I do about this?I don't want to get my dad in trouble and don't want to get in trouble myself. What should I do as my next action to insure my safety and my dad's also.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for contacting NRS we appreciate you reaching out to us. We are very sorry to hear that you are going through this hard situation. You dont deserve to be treated in that manner. From what we understand about the situation it seems as though your mom has been really abusive towards you in the past and you feel as though your best options is to runaway from home and head over to your biological Dad's house. Some things to keep in mind about running away. Usually if you are younger than 18 you would need permission to leave home from your parents/guardians. If that does not happen your parents have the right to file whats called a runaway report. Once this report is made the police would then be looking for you and if found you would be brought back home. Another thing that might be a good idea is to maybe have a plan with your dad about leaving. Sometimes when parents divorce one parent can have sole custody of the child or have split custody. If your mom has sole custody of you, your dad might find himself in trouble if he were to have you at his home. Planning that ahead of time might help you understand how your dad feels about you heading over to his house.
    Another topic we wanted to address was that you mentioned abuse from your mom. Please know that you can report that abuse you went through even if it is past. You always have that option to pursue if you so choose. We can help report alongside you (through our chat or hotline) or there is also another organization called Child Help that specializes in child abuse reporting. Their hotline is:Hotline800-422-4453) and you can also use their chat option to report as well which is : www.childhelp.org/.
    Please know that NRS takes your story very seriously and we always welcome you to reach out to us through our Chat and Hotline options. Again those are (800-786-2929) or online at 1800runaway.org. We hope you can find a solution and please know that we are here 24/7 for any other questions you might have.
    All the best, NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Can I go to my biological father's house at 16 or 17 my mom has been abusive my entire life my aunt's, uncles and grandparents have tried to get custody of me over the years and couldn't cause my mom threatened them...im 16 years old now I'll be 17 in a month and I can't take the abuse anymore it's no longer physical but still happening but my dad wants me to come live with him and I would like that too but I don't know the best way to go about that......and what would happen cause they can't take me from my dad right ?!

    Leave a comment:

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