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Can I legally runaway to my dad's?

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  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like your mom and step dad are giving you a hard time and making your life difficult by trying to take you to court. We’re sorry to hear that your familial situation has gotten to this point, but we hope we can help.

    We’re glad your real dad has been a source of support for you in this time of need. We’re glad he suggested you move in with him, as it sounds like you would feel safer/more comfortable there than where you are now. We however are not legal experts and cannot answer your question about leaving home with 100% certainty. We can provide general information about runaway laws that may or may not apply in your state.

    Generally, if someone under 18 leaves home without parental permission, their guardians can report them as a runaway to police, who then are supposed to track down the youth and return them home. If the youth stays with an adult during their time as a runaway, that person may be charged with harboring a runaway, which can be punishable by jail time. While this charge is relatively uncommon, your mother may be able to motivate the police in your area to file such charges on your dad. Your father may also face greater legal consequences if he violates the terms of his custody by harboring you. Runaway youth are usually not subject to arrest, as running away is usually considered a status offense, which is less severe than a criminal offense. We can help you talk to your local non-emergency police if you want more specific information about the consequences of your suggested plan. Just call us at 1-800-786-2929.

    Hopefully this helped. If not, call us any time. We’re here 24/7.

    -NRS

    We wish you the best of luck and we hope this response was helpful. We encourage you to give your honest feedback of our services at https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think . Stay safe!

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I live with my mom and my step dad and they are like the worst parents ever and they had recently called the cops on me and they will most likely be taking me to court. I have also been talking to my real dad and he wants me to move in with him and my mom said no that she won't allow it. Would it be illegal for me to move in with him at 17 when my mom has custody of me in NH?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS). We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email or bulletin for assistance. If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.
    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
    It looks like you have contacted NRS today in the same forum with the same issue. Please refer to our response above. NRS understands it takes courage to reach out for help; therefore, we would like to minimize the need for you to repeat your situation and avoid offering you duplicate services.
    Be safe,
    NRS

  • ccsmod9
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello There,
    Thank you so much for telling us your story today, it sounds like things are really hard for you and your mother. We want you to know that we think you’re really brave for coming to us today and for standing up for yourself and your mother. That takes courage. Your situation sounds so hard.
    It sounds like home was a very dangerous situation for you and your mother. From what we can tell, it seems like your father has been removed from the home and you’re worried about having to see him again. That sounds like something you may want to express to the social worker or case worker that is involved with your family’s case. It is understandable that you’d be terrified of such a person who has caused so much damage.
    It sounds like you’re in therapy. That can be a great way to deal with the problems your father has caused but it may be important to recognize that it can take time before you’re able to heal. Talking about it can certainly help and we want you to know that you’re welcome to do that anytime here. We’re available 24/7 and are confidential. Our number is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We also have a Live Chat right here on our website if you’re nervous about speaking on the phone. Another useful number for your situation is the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (www.thehotline.org). Since you mentioned suicidal thoughts, www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org is also a helpful organization to help you when you’re feeling like you might want to hurt yourself.
    You’re so strong for enduring all of this abuse and still pushing for your mental health. That takes a lot of strength and determination. We really admire that you’re sticking up for your mother too. We want to encourage you to talk to her, if you’re comfortable, or your therapist, a trusted friend or family member can also be helpful.

    All the best to you and your family,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My mom and I experience domestic abuse in home ..my dads parenting time has been suspended since 2015 ..I am in therapy since 2015..I am 12 terrified of him and i will not comply with any parental visits or reunification therapy ..my mom has called police and therapist i lock myself in room jump out windows I don’t know how many people i have to talk to about this man ..I am terrified of him i get nose bleeds can’t eat sleep .. he has done so much damage i can’t even see him hear him i go into crisis i want to die ...I wish he would just leave me alone ..why isn’t anyone listening to me ?????

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I am 12 years old ..I am on therapy right now my dad has no parenting time and I haven’t seen him since 2015 ..My mom was beaten up almost every day I saw all mentally physically even with me ..I am terrified of him i throw up nose bleeds can’t sleep can’t eat just thinking about him trying to see me ..How many people do i have to talk to so they can see he hurts me? I want to run away die my mom can only do but so much I love my mom and she has been here for me but why can’t the courts realize i’m staying facts and he is dangerous to me

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hey there,

    Thanks for reaching out to us here at the National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It sounds like you are going through a tough time. We hope to be able to help you in any way we can.

    You said you hate your adoptive family. That must be really difficult to feel like you don't have a positive relationship in your home. While we don't know much about your particular situation, when things are tough at home, it might be useful to confide in someone about what is going on. Some people find it helpful to talk to friends, a trusted adult, a school counselor, or a relative.

    If you feel like you would like to have a conversation with your adoptive parents about how you've been feeling and to maybe find solutions or a compromise to your troubles at home, we offer a conference call service here at NRS. To use this service, you would call here at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929), we would talk a little more about your situation, and then we would call out to your parent/guardian. We would talk with them to see what they think has been going on, and then we would connect the calls to all talk together. We stay on the line as an extra measure of support to you and to ensure the conversation stays productive and positive.

    You mentioned recently talking to your birth mum. That is great news that she is sober! If you do decide to run away to her or anywhere else, here is some information that our callers find useful. Running away is not illegal, it is just something that you cannot do because of your age. Should the police find you, their goal would be to return you to your home. However, whoever you stay with could be charged with harboring a runaway. This does not always happen, and we are not legal experts, but this is information that may just be good for you to know. Since you are 14, you are also still obligated by law to go to school, and skipping school is called "truancy". Before you runaway, you may want to consider what you would want to do to continue going to school.

    It's great that you have a boyfriend and group of friends that you like and do not want to leave behind. Running away is a very difficult decision, and while we cannot make your choice for you, hopefully we have given you some things to think about and help you come to your own decision. If you would like to explore these or any other options further, please feel free to call us anytime at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are a 24/7, toll-free safeline. Here to listen, here to help.

    Best of luck,
    NRS

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    im dopted at 14 and my new parent are not the nice people and my birth mum is sober but i dont want to leave the love of my life
    thx
    treze
    Last edited by ccsmod3; 02-01-2018, 07:10 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello, thanks for reaching out and sharing a bit of what is going on. We know that is a really scary thing to do so you should be proud of yourself!
    You do not deserve any type of abuse or to be called a failure. NRS is based in the USA so our resources and knowledge are limited to the U.S. It sounds like your mom has full custody of you and your sister but that you are wanting to move back with your dad. Talking to your dad about this is one option if you have not done so already! He may be able to petition the court to get visitation or custody, especially if there is abuse going on. You may also want to talk to another adult you trust about the abuse: a teacher, family member, neighbor. They may be able to help keep you safe.
    Like we said, our resources are within the United States and we are not sure if you can call a U.S. number. Child Help is the national child abuse hotline here in the US and can help answer questions about abuse and getting custody transferred: 1-800-422-4453, childhelp.org.
    You also mentioned wanting to take your life which is serious and very scary! It makes sense you do not want to live with your mom and be abused any longer. We did find a phone number for a suicide hotline in Mexico: 525-510-2550. You can call them when you are in crisis and want to talk about feeling so depressed and suicidal. If you are ever in immediate danger from abuse or feeling suicidal and feel like you may act immediately you can always call 911 too and a police or ambulance will come to make sure you are okay.
    Thanks again for being brave and reaching out! Best of luck! And remember, you do not deserve abuse.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Moms abusing me a lot

    i can’t support my mom beacuse we are always arguing
    about nothing she always calls me a failure and says that my sister is better at everything she says that I look like a 8 year old child when I’m actually 13 I want to go with my dad but the problem is that mom and me and my sister moved to Mexico and I want to go back with my dad because I can’t support this anymore I’ve even thought of ending my life because of this situation

    so what can I do about this

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod2
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. We are very sorry to hear that you are depressed from not being able to see your mother as often as you would like to. We are not legal experts, so we cannot give you direct answers. Generally speaking, since you are a minor and your father has custody of you, you may only be able to see your mother with his consent. You could try talking to your father about the fact that you would like to see your mother more, he may be willing to compromise. Family therapy may help as well. If you have any other questions, please feel free to contact us directly via our 24 hour crisis hotline (1-800-786-2929), email, or live chat.

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    My dad has custody of me and I get to see my mother every other weekend I was wondering if I told my father that I was going to my mother's house whenever I wanted if he could stop me I am 14 and I live in wyoming I have been loomiing for answers but I haven't found any also if I went to my mom's whenever I wanted and my father called the police on me would they be able to remove me or could I stay since its my decision and nobody else's. I recently contacted a local attorney and asked him all he had to say is that I have no day in where I live but I can put in a suggestion if my parents ever went to court. I really just want to see my mother more and I would really like some help I'm always depressed because I'm always wanting to see her more even while writing this I am tearing up cause it's hard to talk about and I know this is long but I just want an answer that will benefit my runaway without my mother getting in trouble.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod10
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello –

    Thanks for reaching out with your questions and concerns. It sounds like you have made up your mind on moving in with your dad but you’re not sure how to convince your mom.

    If your mom has full custody over you, she could take legal action against your father if you leave without her permission. We have a database and can look for legal aid resources, they would be able to find ways for you to live with your dad.

    It’s understandable that you are not sure how to approach this issue with your mom. Sometimes it may be helpful to think about different ways to reach out like writing her a letter. Another option you could consider is something we have called a parent conference call. If you would like to have a conversation with your mom you can always call us and we could mediate a conversation between the two of you.

    If you would like to talk more about your options or would like to discuss this situation more in depth you can call us at our 24 hour hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We also have a live chat available from 4:30p to 11:30p CST. Our services are confidential and anonymous and there is always someone here to listen and here to help. Take care.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    my mom has full custody of me and my dad lives in california. is it legal for me ,age 12, to move in with him.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod16
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi, thanks for reaching out! You home life sounds super stressful and difficult. We are glad you reached out tonight! It sounds like you have really thought this out and made a plan for when you turn 18, which is really smart and organized of you! In most states, 18 is the age of adulthood when you can move out, however, even if you live in a state where 18 is considered an adult, the school system may still require some things that need a parent signature. The best way to find out if that is true is to contact the school district directly. Maybe you can talk to a counselor or your principal as a first step? There is also something called the McKinney-Vento Act which is in place to ensure all homeless and runaway youth have the right to education. The liaison in your area may be able to answer questions about continuing schooling when not living with your parents too. If you call or live chat us and share what city and state you are in, we can give you contact information for a liaison in your area.
    However, as far as we are aware, once you are 18, your mom cannot call the police and try to keep you in the home against your will. We want you to know you are not responsible for other people’s emotions; like your mom threatening suicide. It is unfair that she puts that weight on you, and no matter what decision your mom makes, it is not by your fault or doing. If you want to talk about this pressure your mom puts on you, we are here 24/7 by phone (1-800-786-2929) and daily on live chat. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline or visit their website: 1-800-273-8255, suicidepreventionlifeline.org. They can offer better information on the topic of suicide, even if you are not the one who is suicidal. You may consider also finding a therapist to talk to. You can find one in your area at samhsa.gov or call us and we can look up some in your area that can be accessible and affordable for you! There is also a Crisis line via text at 741-741. You can text with a trained counselor 24/7 about anything at all! We want you to feel supported!
    If you ever feel physically in danger (like if your mom threatens to hurt you or fight you), we encourage you to call 911 and seek emergency services immediately.
    We are glad you reached out for help, as this situation sounds really difficult and you do not need to handle it alone! You are so strong! We are always here, please call anytime! 1-800-786-2929.
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