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17 year old wants to move out

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  • ccsmod11
    commented on Guest's reply
    (If you are in danger for any reason, please call the police or go to your local emergency room.)

    Hi there,
    Thanks so much for reaching out to us. It sounds like there's a lot going on at home with your dad and given everything you've shared with us, it's understandable why you're frustrated and looking for a way to get through things. We're on your side as you try to get through this. You aren't a spoiled brat at all for having normal human feelings. You deserve to have your hobbies respected.

    We aren't legal experts, but it might be worth reaching out to your mom to see if she can talk to a lawyer about negotiating your custody split. If you can show the court that you aren't at your best with your dad because of his actions, they might be able to adjust your split so that you spend more time with your mom. However, this might be different depending on your individual circumstances or might not be possible at all.

    We'd also be happy to talk you through how to have a mature conversation with your dad about the way his actions are making you feel. We can even mediate a conference call between the two of you to make sure you feel supported. If you don't feel like you are willing to talk to him (which is completely understandable!) you might consider writing a heartfelt letter that explains exactly how you feel.

    We also want to stress how important self-care is during this time. Please reach out to your trusted support network for guidance and a listening ear, and practice hobbies that relax you. Maybe this is writing or watching a favorite TV show. Taking care of your mind and body will help you be better prepared to face your situation.

    We would love to hear more about your story and give you more personalized advice. The NRS is here 24/7 via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We hope to hear from you soon!
    Good luck!
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hi, I've came here for advice. My parents divorced 2 years ago, and have been living in different places for 3 years. My father has always been not the brightest. He is a narcissist, he doesn't realize it. He throws the dumbest fits about my hobbies, and small things. I'm probably being a spoiled brat saying all this.
    His newest girlfriend has been staying the night everyday I'm here, well most, and he looks like her and they have the same laugh. It's driving me insane. He gets like this when he likes girls. I've been standing up for myself, verbally, and he is just picking me apart. I'm not old enough where I am to decide on living with my mom full time. Are there ways to cope? Or ways to clean it up or ignore it? I can't do this.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod11
    commented on Guest's reply
    (If you are in danger for any reason, please call the police or go to your local emergency room).



    Hi there,
    Thanks so much for reaching out to us. We are SO sorry to hear that you are being abused at home, and we are on your side as you attempt to figure out the right moves going forward. We'll discuss some of the issues you brought up, but we'd love it if you reached out to us via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) so we can get a better understanding of your story.

    Since you mentioned you're being abused, we want to let you know that you have the right to report it. If you want to learn more about this process or get help filing one, you can reach out to us or our friends at ChildHelp (https://www.childhelp.org/)

    You also mentioned that you were interested in emancipation. It sounds like you're really serious about this, and we're very impressed by your budget. We're not legal experts, but our general understanding is that some states offer emancipation statutes while others do not. Generally speaking, courts are wary about granting emancipation. As you know, in most cases you would have to prove in court that you have an income and can care for yourself financially, you can live separately from your parents, and are generally in good school standing. The court will also factor in in the mental and physical welfare of your parents. Usually your parents would have to agree to this in court. Once you're emancipated you can legally choose where you live, but until you turn 18 you might find it difficult to sign a lease or build credit. The emancipation process can take several months to a year and may cost money in the form of court fees. Usually the best way to learn more about emancipation in your state is to contact a lawyer or your local family courthouse. We can also help you see if there are any legal resources in your area to learn more. Please do not hesitate to reach out with any other questions.

    Emancipation is a long and difficult process, and we saw you mention that you don't feel like you can make it until then. If you don't have any friends or family you are comfortable staying with, we are happy to help you find a youth shelter that can give you a place to cool off for a while and help you figure out next steps, which might look like helping you file a CPS report against your dad.

    If you want to talk more about what leaving home might look like, we're here 24/7 to help talk you through things. We hope to hear from you soon!
    Good luck!
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hi so I just moved in with my dad in Colorado and need to get out. He is incredibly abusive and need an out. My original plan was to move out at 17 and I had everything planned out with money, medical, rent/housing, and food. I planned to runaway live on my own and get emancipated.
    Would I be able to get emancipated without parents permission I’ve done research but if the government saw I was self sufficient and being abused would they let me?
    I have lots of poof.
    But I’m not sure I can make till then. So my plan wouldn’t work since part of it would take time gaining money and support from people at school. So unless I get a bunch of money to live off of I’m not sure how.

    this was my money plan (the minimum wedge is 17.29) and rent is from $800 - $1300

    Work for 17.29

    5 hours after school = 86.45
    • (E1) For 3 days = 259.35

    • For a month = 1,037.40
    • (E2) For 4 days = 345.80

    • For a month = 1,383.20

    6 hours after school = 103.74
    • (F1) For 3 days = 311.22 • For a month = 1,244.88
    • (F2) For 4 days = 414.96

    • For a month = 1,659.84

    Work for 15 hours on the weekend = 259.35
    • For a month = 1,037.40

    • plus E1 = 2,074.80

    - 30 hours a week

    • plus E2 = 2,420.6

    - 35 hours a week

    • plus F1 = 2,282.28

    - 33 hours a week

    • plus F2 = 2,697.24

    - 39 hours a week​

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest
    Guest replied
    I need some advice or tips!!

    hello i'm r, i'm 15 years old and i've been planning to move out when i'm 17, with my boyfriend (who also lives in the same state and is 16 ) we've been planning this for months now and he is financially supported. but when It said I HAVE to get permission by the court to move out which is not possible for me. The reason i'm wanting to move out is because I do not feel safe at home, but I can't show proof that I don't feel safe and the events that happened to me. I know I have to prove that I can take care of myself but I can't get a job due to my parents. I dunno what to do.
    Last edited by ccsmod15; 05-25-2023, 11:59 PM. Reason: removed Identifying info

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Okay, so I am 17 and I need to move out. I live in Missouri and can't with them anymore. They found out I am gay and trans and they have made my life a living hell. I don't know what to do. I am planning on living with my partner until we both graduate, but I am scared that they will make me come back here, and this will only make things worse.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod7
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. While we are not legal experts, generally when someone turns 18 they are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that they can move out if they want to and they won’t be considered a runaway. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live.  We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.

    Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

    If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

    Be safe,
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    i’m 17 and turning 18 next month can i move out without parental consent in nevada with no legal consequences?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod1
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    We appreciate you reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS) and we recognize the courage and strength it takes to reach out and share your story. We are deeply sorry that you are having this experience at home. You deserve to be celebrated for who you are and it sounds like that has not been your experience at home.

    We regret to inform you that our services are based in the United States and we unfortunately do not have the resources to assist outside of the U.S. With that being said, we are happy to provide you with information for Kids Help Phone, which is a crisis support line for youth and young adults in Canada. Kids Help Phone advertises that they are available 24-hours per day, so you may contact them at any time that is convenient for you. Their website is https://kidshelpphone.ca/need-help-now-text-us/ and to reach them, you may call 1-800-668-6868 (toll-free) or text CONNECT to 686868.

    We hope that this helps and we apologize that we are unable to provide more assistance on our end. In the event that you need assistance looking for additional resources serving Canada, please feel welcome to reach out to us at 1-800-RUNAWAY or chat us directly through our online portal, found on our website at www.1800runaway.org

    Take care and stay safe,
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    17 Alberta Canada move out??

    I’m 17 living in Alberta Canada and I need to get out of my homophobic household. My parents went through my phone and found out I’m dating a girl, they forbid me from seeing her and told me they would rather die than see me live my life with a girl. I ran away once but came back after a couple days when they promised things would change, they didn’t. They tried sending me to a boarding school in India to “cure” me. I ran away again a few days ago. At first, they called the police but I got in contact with my parents and told them I’m safe so they told the police to forget about it. My younger sister told me they changed the locks at home but they have still been calling all my friends for the past few days. Apparently they’re worried but supposedly don’t want me to ever come back. I don’t want to go back.

    I have been looking for a job so I can get my own place but my parents are keeping all my important paper work, SIN number, etc.. How can I get these without having to go through my parents? I do have my Alberta health care card and my drivers license with me. Who should I get in contact with to help me move out and begin living independently? And am I legally allowed to do all this?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod0
    commented on Guest's reply
    Hello,

    You mentioned some things that raise concern for your safety and well-being. If any harm or abuse is happening at home, you have the right to report it. We are not experts on the issue, but generally once it's been reported, social services will either decide whether or not to take the case and further investigate. If they do take the case, they will send out someone from child protective services to do an investigation (interviewing people in the household) and from there they will decide the level of danger within the household. It generally ranges from no danger (the youth stays in the home, some services are given, and the case is closed), moderate danger (they will provide family services with possible temporary displacement) and high danger (they will remove the youth from the home and offer certain services).

    If you feel like this is an option you want to explore, you may find this website helpful: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse/. We can also help you to file a report if that’s the route you are considering.

    Please be safe and reach out soon by phone or chat so that we may help.
    Take care,
    NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    Hi, I'm looking for some advice. So my father has always been abusive to me and I'm currently only 12 and finally noticing this, he has anger issues and doesn't care about my opinions when I tell him he always makes excuses such as when I didn't want to move because I'd have to change schools I told him and he made the same excuse every time "It's only in a year" I was forced to agree to this and now fear that only in a month my life will be living hell. When I tell him anything about my opinions he says "You can't always get your way" or "Not everything is about you" I never say it is when I do agree it's usually after being forced. He's hit me and thrown stuff and claims it was a light hit and when he does finally apologize he says it was my fault this probably caused my anxiety and overthinking. I don't know what to do, since my parents have divorced my mom is not there when he does this. I can't runaway and stay with my mom forever he'll find me and be really mad as he always does. What should I do?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    commented on Guest's reply
    Thank you for your response to another user’s post. Often forums are a place of support and understanding for many youth. It often may be validating and helpful for users to read similar situations as well as exchange feedback to one another. Generally we try to be non-directive as its really hard to make a decision on the behalf of someone else and it is empowering to make their own decisions. For anyone experiencing any difficulties or challenges, the National Runaway Safeline encourages youth to reach out to our 24/7 crisis support line either by phone or chat for immediate services.
    Thank you, NRS

  • Guest
    Guest replied
    You should be careful about the 17 year old man and call someone for help

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest
    Guest replied
    im 17 and i want to move out, im waiting for job corps to come but im just about given up on school and living at home is difficult because ive broken so many rules and my parents are constantly mad at me and i still cant get things right. Where could i go?

    Leave a comment:

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