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  • 17 year old wants to move out

    Hi, my name is Brianna. I live in California, and I'm 17 years old.I want to move out once I graduate in June, and I want to move in with my boyfriend in Utah, where there is already a housing setup for us. I'm doing this mostly to get away from my dad, who continuously takes away my car when he is mad (which prevents me from going to work). The problem is this: i will still e 17 when I want to move and my boyfriend is 19. The age of consent is California is 18, but in Colorado it's 17, as long as there is no more than a 10 year age difference. My grandpa is threatening to call cops on my boyfriend if I move, and get him arrested for statutory rape. My question is, if I moved in with my boyfriend at 17 in Utah, could he get arrested?

  • #2
    Re: 17 year old wants to move out

    Hi Brianna,

    Thanks so much for contacting us with your question. It sounds like you are dealing with a tough situation at home right now and you mentioned that things with you and your dad are a bit rough. You mentioned that you are planning on leaving after you graduate from school and move in with your boyfriend. The concern it seems is that you are still going to be 17. You are right that in most states the age of majority, when a youth is considered an adult, is 18. But it is difficult to know exactly what the police would do in this situation. We often hear that while the legal age of majority is 18, at 17 some local police no longer take runaway reports or make the youth return home if they leave without permission. It is difficult because unfortunately we cannot answer specific legal questions but a good option to get some information may be to contact your local police department on their non emergency line. Some questions that you may want to ask would be what is the age of majority in your area? At 17 can a youth leave home without permission? It may also depend on how close you are to being 18 when you do decide to leave. It’s good that you have a safe place to go if you do decide to leave and that you are thinking ahead. IF you ended up finding out that you would have to wait to leave until you were 18 do you think there is anything that would make being at home a better situation?

    We are so glad that you were able to reach out and talk with us a bit about the situation. Just so you know if you would like to discuss your situation more in depth you can contact us immediately at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). We are a completely confidential hotline that is available 24 hours a day. There is always someone available to provide support, discuss options, and find resources in your area if needed. We also have an online crisis chat set up that is currently available from 4:30p to 11:30p CST. Please feel free to reach out to us anytime. Take care.
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Help me please!!

      I'm a 17 year old sophomore in the state of California. I want to desperately!!! move out of my parents house because of the way I am treated by my parents. Both have been married for 21 years and I am the 3rd child out of 3 girls. My older sisters are in college and one has her own apartment. Growing up, I never got along with either of them. They both spend time with eachother more than they even TRY to spend time with me. My mother and I's relationship has been crumbling down into even MORE bits and pieces for the past 5 years now. She's constantly telling me what I can and can't do. I go to her to try and have a better relationship but at the end if we get into an argument she will use private personal and very emotional stuff I've told her, against me and announce it to the world. I, for one, DISLIKE this behavior from anyone! & it's very hurtful knowing its coming from my own mother. I have a temper and I do lose my patience and cool easily. I've gone to a therapist before and tried to sit through it but I rarely got a chance to talk because my mother always wants to be labeled the victim. I dont get along with her mother( my grandma ) nor her 6 sisters and 4 brothers. They are all so far up their own ass's I keep away! Ive told my mother she failed at being a mom because no mother that i know would constantly call the cops on their own daughter and then have them take me to a adolecent mental hospital. There is nothing wrong with me and I know it. my father sides with her all the time, so I FEEL TRAPED! If i ask for $5-10-25 dollars for hanging out or gas money for my car I am blamed for money being short. Honestly, I've thought about suicide and ways to end my life. I've thought about running away. I just want to go to school and be on my own. I hate crying every single night because of the conditions and parents I live with. Please help me. I just want to go!

      Comment


      • #4
        re: Help me please!!

        Hi

        Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Safeline. We sorry to hear about the things you have been experiencing at home. It’s unfortunate that your mother shares your personal and emotional information in order to hurt you. It sounds like you have had a rocky relationship with your parents and siblings for quite some while. It sounds like having such a relationship can be hurtful at times. You mentioned that you have had thoughts of suicide and running away before. Have you ever shared your feelings about what is going on with anyone else? It sounds like not having an outlet to share these types of things can be difficult. You mentioned that your mom has had you placed in an adolescent mental hospital before. Have you ever spoken to a counselor or therapist? You also mentioned that you like to continue school and be on your own. If you were to leave home, would you be able to support yourself? Depending on the city and state that you are located in there may be resources available. Some areas have emergency and transitional housing for youth. In addition to proving housing, many youth shelters have counseling along with a host of other services available for youth. Deciding if running away is the best option for you can become difficult. If you would like to speak to someone at the National Runaway Safeline, we can be reached at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Our hotline is confidential, anonymous, toll-free, and available 24/7. In addition to speaking to us to discuss your options, the National Suicide Hotline is also available 24/7 and can be reached at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

        We hope your conditions start to improve for you. We look forward to hearing from you. We will like to wish you the best of luck.

        ~NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          almost 17 && a half .

          hi i live in california && im temporarily living with my aunt, we dont get along at all, shes always just mean to me for no reason && doesnt like my bf for no reason && i dont want to live with my mon cause sometimes she can be nice but other times shes just extremely mean, ill be 18 in 8 months, my boyfriend just turned 20 && when he gets his apartment i want to move in with him, but ill only be 17 && a half when he gets it, can i leave without there permission ? or will they put him in jail ? or what will happen to me ?

          Comment


          • #6
            Hello Almost 17 & a half,
            Thank you for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.

            It sounds like you are unsatisfied living with your relatives and you are wondering if you might legally move out at 17 and a half.
            Is that right?
            Well because we are not legal experts at NRS we can only say that the legal age in California is eighteen.
            What that generally means is that you would be still considered a minor and as such your parent or guardian is legally responsible for you.
            If you were to leave home before your eighteenth birthday you may be considered a runaway.
            Your guardian could file a runaway report with your local police department.
            You could be returned to your guardians if picked up by the police.
            Does that make sense?

            There are laws for harboring or aiding runaway youth.
            Your local police department could probably explain just what those laws are.

            We hope this information helps but if you have more questions about your situation please call our toll free 24hr crisis line at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or feel free to try the NRS live chat service on our website www.1800Runaway.org the live chat is available 7 days a week 4:30pm until 11:30pm (CST).

            Thank you again for contacting the National Runaway Safeline.
            Take Care
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • #7
              Help

              I'm 17 and live in Utah. I live with my Mother, and her boyfriend. They constantly drink and party and will treat me unfairly. I am a honors student, am involved with medical care and the University of Utah. My mom will kick me out of the house every month or so, then i will go stay with a friend for about a week, when one day ill be picked up from school by cops and taken home, is it possible for me to just live with a friend? And also what if my parents dont consent to living with a friend?

              Comment


              • #8
                RE: Help

                If you have contacted NRS today through another means (for example, live chat, email or bulletin) for the same issue, it would be helpful to let us know that you have already contacted us. NRS understands it takes courage to reach out for help; therefore, we would like to minimize the need for you to repeat your situation and avoid offering you duplicate services.

                Good luck to you,

                NRS
                Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                National Runaway Safeline
                [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                Tell us what you think about your experience!
                https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                Comment


                • #9
                  Need to move out!

                  I am 17 and I live in montana with my mom, brother and sister. My mom no longer wishes me to live with her and I have been wanting to move out soon after my dad died. My question is do I have to go through an emancipation or could I get informal consent from my mom written on a paper or something. I have the means to move out and I will be graduating this year in june but would like to be out before then. Please help!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    re: need to move out

                    Thank you for reaching out to us about what is going on at home. It sounds like you are going through a big life change and we are happy to help support you. We are not legal experts, but generally a parent is legally responsible for their children until they turn 18. Emancipation is an option that you and your mother can consider. Here is a link to more information on emancipation in Montana (http://www.mtlsa.org/wp-content/uplo...ancipation.pdf). If you would like to further discuss your situation and other possible options, please feel free to contact us directly. Our 1-800-RUNAWAY hotline is open 24/7 and is completely anonymous and confidential. You also have the option to chat with us any day from 4:30 PM-11:30 PM (CST).

                    We appreciate you contacting us during this difficult time and hope to hear from you.
                    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                    National Runaway Safeline
                    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                    Tell us what you think about your experience!
                    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      17 and tired

                      Hi im 17 years old and live in California. I want to move out of my house because i feel neglected and stressed. My mother hasnt paid much attention of me since i started dating my boyfriend. She says that since i have him that i dont need as much attention and when she does talk to me it is to either run to the store for her or to yell at me for something my brother and sister have done. I have already told her that i wanted to move out but she just says no. My brother would hit me and call me names saying he doesnt love me and my sister doesnt even notice i exsist. I am only 17 years old and already have gray hair. I plan on moving in with my boyfriend of 2 years into a low income appartment he makes $260 a week and his dad would pay $500 a month for rent. What can i do?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        re: 17 and tired

                        Hi

                        Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline. We are sorry to hear the way things are going for you. It sounds like you would like to move out because home life is stressful and you feel neglected. It seems that your mother will not give you permission to move out. In some states, the age that you can legally move out is different the age of majority. To find out for sure what age you can legally move out in the state of California, you can contact your local non-emergency law enforcement hotline. If the age that you can legally move out is 18, emancipation can get looked into as an alternative. Does your mother have full custody of you? The options that are available to you may depend on the laws in your state. We can provide legal referrals if you like. We are available 24/7 and can be reached by dialing 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). Our hotline is confidential, anonymous, and toll-free. We can also be reached via live chat between 4:30pm and 11:30pm CST.

                        We hope the information provided helps.

                        Best Wishes
                        ~NRS
                        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                        National Runaway Safeline
                        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                        Tell us what you think about your experience!
                        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          17 Georgia move out?

                          Hi my name is ****, I live in Georgia. As of right know I have just turned 17. I am home schooled and going to be sent my deploma from the American School system here in a few months. My boyfriend lives about 10 minutes from where I live. He is 18 going to be 19 in November. I want to go move in with him when I get done with school but my mom does not approve. If I tell her im moving out and she calls the police on me what can they do? I have a full time job, ill be graduated from high-school and I have my own car. No family problems just basic family arguments and things like that. I just want to get up on my feet without getting into legal trouble.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            17 Georgia move out?

                            Hello there,

                            If you have contacted NRS today through another means (for example, live chat, email or bulletin) for the same issue, it would be helpful to let us know that you have already contacted us. NRS understands it takes courage to reach out for help; therefore, we would like to minimize the need for you to repeat your situation and avoid offering you duplicate services.

                            -NRS
                            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                            National Runaway Safeline
                            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
                            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                            Tell us what you think about your experience!
                            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              17 and wanting to leave

                              Hello I'm a 17 year old girl who is 10 months away from being 18 and wanting to move out of my house. I have been doing some research and some say it is legal. I have ran away once due to my mother saying she wished she had aborted me when she had the chance. My brother and my grandma are nothing willing to take me in to their homes to live with them so I can have a healthier life. But my parents won't allow it. What should i do?

                              Comment

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