Do my 'parents' care?

[Guest]

I left home when I was 15 to move in an apt with a friend. I am adopted and I dont think my mother likes me like she does her real 2 kids, and she lies to her friends about me and then when they are around she tries to act so nice then. She even does this around my dad, but he is ignoring it. He tells me to try harder and its my perception.

I asked to come back shortly after and my mom said no. They found an efficiency and put me in there. They paid the rent but nothing else, but I was working at a part time job, so I could afford junk food. They never called. I got depressed and moved 1/2 way across the country staying at the youth hostel, then found a nanny job, which I had to lie about and in the evenings I could work.

They still never call me. I do talk to my dad, call him, but only if mom isnt around. He brags about his friends kids, how they made it to some big college. They dont even seem to care if I eat. They think I am self sufficient. My dad still has blinders on and thinks I should try harder, but she never calls so I dont think she cares.

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Re: Do my 'parents' care?

Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Switchboard. We are sorry to hear about your situation with your parents. It sounds like you have been through a lot and we can’t imagine it being easy to provide for yourself right now. It must have taken an incredible amount of strength to do so at such a young age and it sounds like you are wise beyond your years.

It sounds like your relationship with your mom is more difficult than your dad, although you mention he still has “blinders” on. Sometimes people find it helpful to discuss relationship problems with someone else like a friend, family member, counselor, etc. Who do you have to talk to about this? If you don’t feel you have anyone to talk to and are interested in counseling, support groups, etc., we would be happy to look up those resources for you if you give us your city and state. Also, have you thought about what you would like to see happen in regards to your relationship with your parents and your living situation?

A couple of services we offer to runaway, homeless, and at-risk youth are our message service and conference calling. Our message service allows youth to leave a message to their parent/guardian and vice versa. This allows youth to reconnect with their parents when they are away from home.

Conference calling includes to both a parent/guardian and to social service agencies. For example, if a youth calls and would like to speak to a parent/guardian we can mediate the call. If a youth needs a safe place to go (like a runaway youth shelter), we do our best to locate those and can offer to call and advocate to a shelter. We can also do this to a variety of social service agencies (ex. Child Protective Services, Legal aid, etc.) depending on the situation. For more information on these services you are welcome to check out our website, if you haven’t had the chance to do so yet. http://www.1800runaway.org/youth_teens/ ... touch.html

We encourage you to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are anonymous, confidential, and are available 24/7. If you are interested in any of the options discussed above or would simply like to talk more in detail with your situation, we would be happy to listen. Best of luck to you.

-NRS