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  • Recent thoughts about running away.

    The day after my 17th birthday, I came home to a missing laptop battery, a missing power cord for one of my consoles, and another entire console missing from my room. The next day it came to my attention that service on my cellphone had been canceled. It is not for this reason that I wish to part from this household, my story is as follows:
    I am the first born child, and for most of my childhood, my father didn't have much of a significant part in my life. It has only been within the past few years that he has decided that he would become part of my life. All was well for the most part except for his narcissistic, ostentatious, condescending tones of speech towards my mother, grandmother, brothers and I. I have come to believe that he is what the devil would be like if he were in a human body. He has no remorse for human life, and seems to only be in existence for the sole purpose of his own satisfaction. Also, everything that goes on in this house is relayed to his mother, even before his own wife knows of it. He has managed to turn my grandparents (on his side of the family) and my own mother against me, and I have nowhere else to turn, because my grandmother(mother's side), who practically raised me is treated and talked to like an adolescent. He doesn't say it openly, but he constantly projects this idea that I will amount to nothing, and won't get into college, when he never even made it through community college. My mother and he can never hold a conversation lately without either yelling at me, or accusing me of something I didn't do. I hate this man so much, and I'm sure I'm not the only one, and I also hate my mother for sticking by his side through the worst of his rampages, and I fear the events to come if I get bad grades on a report card let alone a progress report. I have nowhere else to turn because I can't tell his mother for she is on his side and will believe nothing I tell her. I need some sort of guidance
    P.s My dad also constantly compares my youngest brother to my middle brother as far as grades go, I am in high school and my youngest brother is only in the sixth grade which makes for a terrible comparison because of the difference in material, but it is stiff very demoralizing and unnecessary, and I'm sure he does it on purpose.

  • #2
    Re: Recent thoughts about running away.

    Thank you for sharing your situation with us at the National Runaway Switchboard. We are sorry to hear about the difficult time you are having with your father. Everything you are experiencing sounds very difficult and you must be incredibly perseverant to have been handling it as well as you have. It sounds like a lot has happened in your life and that your relationship with your father is strained at best. It must have been very difficult to have come home right after your birthday and have all your technology ransacked. It seems like you have some strong feelings towards him and how he has impacted your relationships with other family members. You mention your parents being unable to have a conversation with you without yelling. Is there anyone or any way you think you could sit down and have a productive conversation? It sounds like you feel isolated towards the rest of your family, but is there anyone you think could act as a mediator?

    You hint at wishing to part from your household, but we aren’t quite sure of your plan. While we are not here to tell you what to do, we are here to listen and help you try and come up with options. If you haven’t had a chance to fully check out our website, here are some common questions to think about before running. http://www.1800runaway.org/youth_teens/nrs_help.html

    Running away is normally just a status offense meaning you can’t do so until you reach the age of majority in your state. Unless you’ve committed another crime, normally police just send youth who are registered as a runaway back home. Do you think your parents would file you as a runaway? This is something many parents do to protect themselves in the event their child runs away. Police can enter runaway and missing youth into their NCIC (National Crime Information Center) which is a National Database. Though they don’t always actively look for youth, they can use it if they come across someone they think might be a runaway. Other common laws associated with running away are harboring a runaway and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. Harboring a runaway happens when someone allows a youth to stay at their home without the permission of the parent/guardian. Contributing to the delinquency of a minor can be applied to lots of situations so it isn’t limited to only runaway cases. These are often only misdemeanors and can vary from state to state.

    One option to avoid some of these things would be going to a runaway or homeless youth shelter. These are not available in every city or town (and can be difficult to find in smaller towns/ rural areas.) However, if you are interested in this option it can help avoid harboring a runaway risks because shelters would have to contact or even get consent from a parent/guardian (anywhere from immediately to 72 hours.) If you would like to tell us where you are located we can do our best to provide you with the nearest shelters. Or, you can go to this website http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/fysb/co ... locate.htm and click on your state for ideas.

    Another option would be to text the word “SAFE” to 69866 to locate shelters associated with National Safe Place. More information can be found by going to http://www.nationalsafeplace.org Keep in mind that if there isn’t a Safe Place shelter nearby they may redirect you to a national hotline including us at 1-800-RUNAWAY.
    If you would like to continue talking about your situation or brainstorming options feel free to call us. We are anonymous, confidential, and available 24/7. We hope you remain safe and things get better for you.

    Best of luck,
    NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

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