16 yr old in need

[Guest]

i am turning 16 soon, and my parents are becoming more strict. i keep thinking about running away, but i can not bring myself to actually doing it. my stepdad is getting meaner and more mentally agressive by the day, and i have no phone to contact anyone, so i use the internet, is there someone i can contact that may be able to help me?

[ccsmod1]

Re: 16 yr old in need

Hi there. Thanks for reaching out to us via our bulletin boards. It sounds like you’re in a tough situation at home and you’re feeling like you can’t stay with your mom and stepdad anymore. We’re sorry to hear that they’re becoming stricter. From what you wrote, it sounds like you’re looking for information about running away. We can offer you general information that we know concerning youth your age that don’t want to live at home anymore, but keep in mind that we’re not lawyers so we can’t give you legal advice.

Generally speaking, there are not very many legal ways for a minor (someone under 1 to leave their home. There are three ways that we know of in which this can happen:

1) Get your parent’s/guardian’s permission to live elsewhere. Keep in mind that with this option that they can legally change their minds anytime, unless they officially sign over custody to someone else. Transferring custody would most likely have to go through the local courts.
2) Be removed from your home by Child Protective Services. This is for cases of abuse or neglect. To pursue this option, you would need to file an abuse/neglect report with your local CPS. They would then do an investigation to see what the situation is. If they deem a youth’s home unsafe, then they can make alternative living arrangements. Removing someone from their home is often the last step. CPS usually attempts to keep families together by helping them work through issues.
3) Get emancipated. This is a legal process in which a youth can petition the courts for the rights of an adult before turning 18. Not every state has an emancipation process. Those that do generally require that the youth prove that they are capable of financially and socially supporting themselves. Parents/guardians are often involved in this process and sometimes also have to give their consent.

Do any of the above options sound like something you’d like to pursue? We’d be happy to provide you with specific information about either of the last two options, provided we know a city/state to look for information in.

We definitely hear that it’s really hard at home for you right now. One other option that you can look into is going to a local youth shelter to get a break from your parents and for help with mediating the situation between you and your parents. One thing to know about shelters is that, by law, they do have to contact your legal guardian in order for you to stay there. To find out if there are shelters in your area you can go to: http://ncfy.acf.hhs.gov/locate/index.htm or www.nationalsafeplace.org. You can also use National Safe Place’s TXT4Help to find out the closest shelter to you. Instructions for how this works can eb found here: http://www.nationalsafeplace.org/txt4help/

One thing that may be important to know is that if you leave home without permission, even if your parents know where you are, your parents have the right to call the local police and file you as a runaway. If you’re found as a runaway, the police will likely bring you back home. It’s also important to know that anyone that helps a runaway, specifically by providing housing, and doesn’t contact the youth’s parents or the police, could be at risk of getting charged with harboring a runaway. Both of these procedures are up to the individual police department’s discretion.

Besides leaving, is there anything else that you can think of that might be able to help you deal with what’s going on at home? Are there adults in your life that you’re able to turn to for support-maybe a teacher or counselor at school? Sometimes it’s also helpful to find other activities (after school activities, volunteer opportunities, etc) outside of the home as a way to stay away as much as possible.

We’d be happy to talk to you further about what’s going on and how you’re feeling if you’re able to call. We’re a toll-free number, so it’s free from all the payphones. We’re also anonymous and confidential. If there’s something specific you were looking for, you’re welcome to post back to the bulletin boards or email [email protected]. Best of luck to you!

[Guest]

Re: 16 yr old in need

both options 2 and 3 sound good to me, but i doubt i can do anything about abuse. i havent been physically or mentally abused that i can prove, but i can not stand living with my stepdad and my mother at the time. i am in Wheeling West Virginia

[ccsmod1]

Re: 16 yr old in need

Thanks for responding so quickly. It’s great that you’re trying to look into different options available to you.

If you want to call the CPS in your area to make a report, you can call the Ohio County Department of Health and Human Services #304-232-4411 or you can call the statewide Child Abuse Reporting Hotline #1-800-352-6513. If you wanted help making a report, you’re welcome to call us and we could do a conference call between you and CPS.

We looked up the emancipation information in West Virginia. It states that you have to be at least 16 years old. The youth's parents are involved in the process. The youth has to prove that they can care for their physical and financial wellbeing. If the courts can determine that emancipation is in the youth’s best interested, then it’s granted. For more information here’s a legal aid number in your area is #304-232-1260. You can also attempt to contact the local courts to find out how to start an emancipation petition. The Ohio County Circuit Court is #304-234-3611.

Like we said before, we’re always here if you want to call and talk to someone directly. We hope you’re able to find a solution that works for you.

[Guest]

Re: 16 yr old in need

i could give the emancipation a try, i will be 16 on march 28th 2010, this sunday. i will need help getting this though. i have no idea how it works and i have no idea how the legal system works. i could easily prove that i can take care of myself. i even have a line of people willing to testify for me.

[ccsmod1]

Re: 16 yr old in need

It sounds like you feel like emancipation is a process you want to look into and that you would have a way to support yourself. Unfortunately, since we don’t have a legal background, we aren’t able to provide any specific guidance when it comes to emancipation. Keep in mind that it can be a long process (a couple months), since it does go through the courts. It may also be important to note that while many states have formal emancipation processes, in reality rarely emancipate minors. We don’t have any information concerning West Virginia and how often they utilize the process. The legal aid number we listed in our previous response may have more helpful information about your chances of getting emancipated and how to get the process started. Also, like we wrote before, more than likely the process will have to be initiated with and go through your county court, so the number previously provided may also be able to offer more information.

Since our bulletin boards aren’t really meant for on-going communication, if there’s anything else you need please feel free to give us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY anytime. We hope you’re able to have a good birthday weekend. Remember we’re always here if you need to talk about what’s going on or want to discuss your options further.