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  • I'm 16 with nowhere to go

    My mom makes me watch my four year old sister every since my older sister left 3 years ago. My older sister left the same day after she graduated because of how my mom treat us. Everywhere I go my little sister goes along with me except for school. I walk her to daycare before I go to school then pick her up even when our mother is home and she has a car. On weekends she goes out and have her fun while i sit at the house with her child and do nothing. I would love to go to movies with my friends but i always have my little sister. I had opportunities to get a job at taco bell and another restaurant place but she said that I couldn't get the job. My grades are good. I make A and B's and one C on my report card always but I never get rewarded. I'm in 11th grade at this moment with a good education ahead of me but my mom kicked me out of the house with no where to go because I embarrassed her. I'm back in because I begged and she just threaten to kick me out again and this time I'm not coming back. I need help I got a place to go but that's in a different state and if i go I wouldn't be able to graduation from high school or even go to college like I want to. I need a place to go when she kicks me out so I can finish my education at least at my high school.

  • #2
    Re: I'm 16 with nowhere to go

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Switchboard. It sounds like you are having a difficult time with your mom. It sounds like you resent having to watch your little sister instead of going out with your friends and getting a job. We commend you in your school performance which sounds very important to you. We are sorry to hear that your mom has kicked you out in the past and has threatened to again. It sounds like if that does happen, you are not planning on coming back.

    Options for where youth can go if they have been kicked out, have run away, or are homeless usually fall into these categories: youth shelters, Child Protective Services (CPS), or friend/family member (if the parent/guardian gives consent). Youth shelters and CPS services can often give youth not only a place to stay, but other services like counseling, family mediation, and other support services. The goal is generally to provide youth with a safe place to go while also thinking about a more permanent plan. As for school, different shelters have different setups – some provide transportation to a youth’s home school and others offer only on site schooling. So, you would have to ask them directly to see. Here is a link where you can find shelters based upon state. http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/fysb/co ... locate.htm

    Shelters are generally going to have to contact a parent/guardian anywhere from immediately to 72 hours. This is so they don’t get in trouble for harboring a runaway (which is usually considered a crime.) CPS can sometimes become an option in cases involving abuse/ negelct or in areas which do not have youth shelters. (Note: in some areas kicking a child out of the home and then locking them out is considered neglectful and illegal.) The friend/family member option can sometimes be difficult because unless a parent/ guardian creates a written or typed document granting permission and has that notarized, it can sometimes be difficult to show permission in the event that they change their mind.

    We hope some of these ideas for options can help, but if you would like to talk about your situation in more detail feel free to contact us at 1-800-RUNAWAY. Best of luck!
    -NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      16 broke and homeless

      Im 16 and a runaway, but no egg meaning to be. All my life I put 110% always. every time I'll find good home they would kick me out. Try to send me off to God knows where. Im living with my dad but only because he feels obligated to help me, living with him is unstable. I lost my job and now the people that my dad is living with is getting evicted and today right now i am on the street once again. Can someone please PLEASE tell me what to do what I need to do. I don't know the first steps to take and I'm in this all alone. The worst part about it is I live in the worst area so I can get hurt out there

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: 16 broke and homeless

        Hi there,

        Thank you so much for reaching out. It sounds like you are in a very difficult situation but we’re really glad that you contacted us, we are here to help keep you safe.

        It sounds like you have been struggling to find and keep a safe and stable place to stay. It has to be incredibly hard to lose your job while also having to deal with eviction. You deserve a safe place. If you call us here at (800) RUNAWAY (786 2929), we can look up resources for you in your area and call out to them with you on the line to help advocate on your behalf. Or, if you prefer to call alone that is an option as well. Another resource you can explore is National Safe Place at nationalsafeplace.org. We’re here to help support you in any way that we can.

        We look forward to your call.

        Stay safe,
        NRS
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)
        Tell us what you think about your experience!

        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/we_care_what_you_think

        Comment


        • #5
          I'm 16

          So I'm 16 and my mom and I have been getting into a lot of fights and she told me to leave so I did and I want to go to a friends but i don't know if it is such a good idea because his mom won't let me stay there for a long period of time what do I do?

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: I'm 16

            Hello there,

            Thanks for reaching out today. It sounds like your mom told you to leave so you are planning to go to a friend’s, but you think your mom would not let you stay there for a while. That sounds really frustrating to be told to leave, but not being sure if you can go where you want to.

            If you have not left yet, you might tell your mom where you are going so if she does have a problem with it she can let you know before you leave. If she gives you permission to stay there, you legally can stay there. If she tells you that you cannot stay there or leave, and you leave without permission. That is when your mom has the right to file a runaway report for you with the police. If she does that and the police find you, typically they would return you home to your mom. Running away is usually a status offense due to your age, so it is not something you would typically get in legal trouble for doing.

            We are not legal experts, but generally speaking kicking a minor out of the house before they are 18 can be considered neglect by child protective services (CPS). So if your mom has kicked you out, you have the right to file a neglect report with CPS. If you have questions about reporting you might contact the expert child advocates at Child Help USA: 1-800-422-4453. You can always call us here at 1-800-RUNAWAY if you would like assistance with making a report.

            We strongly encourage you to call or chat us if you would like to have a conversation about your situation and help with brainstorming your options. We can also help you report or find youth shelters in your area if you need.

            Best wishes,

            -NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • #7
              I know of a child that's 16 and he's been kicked out of his house. He doesn't have family or friends to stay with. His mom has told people he's a runaway and that's not the case... she kicks him out all the time. From what I know he has obtained a job but has no where to stay... does he have options?

              Comment


              • ccsmod14
                ccsmod14 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hi there,

                Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.

                It sounds like the child you are concerned about does not have many options at the moment. We are not legal experts here but if his legal guardian has filed him as a runaway, then police may escort him home.

                You can try giving us a call at 1-800-RUNAWAY and we can see if there are some nearby runaway/homeless youth shelters in the area. The policies at the youth shelters vary so it is hard to say what his options are at length or without calling the shelters directly.

                NRS

            • #8
              I made a few mistakes and I've realized where I went wrong and corrected it. But My parents made it clear that they never want to see me again and my dad said he is disowning me. I have no where to go and it's raining outside

              Comment


              • ccsmod7
                ccsmod7 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hey there,
                Thanks for reaching out. It sounds like you’ve been going so much. You mentioned that you’ve been trying to fix some mistakes that you’ve made. It takes a lot to admit mistakes and even more courage to fix them. The fact that you are trying to turn your life around is amazing.

                You mentioned that your parents have kicked you out and your dad is disowning you. If you are under 18, this is illegal. Your parents cannot throw you out. You always have the right to report them for this. If you don’t feel comfortable reporting them, there are some places where you might look into going. One place to look for shelters is www.nationalsafeplace.org. If you click on your state in the upper right corner, you can see if there is a safe place where you can stay for a few nights and get some support. Your safety and well-being is important. If you feel in danger, calling 911 is always an option.

                We also have a database here full of resources and shelters where you might be able to stay to be safe. There are more options for you in terms of getting services if you decide to stay at home too. Please feel free to call us 24 hours a day at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929). If you aren’t able to call, please feel free to chat with us through our website (www.1800runaway.org) from 4.30pm-11.30pm Central Time.

                We hope to hear from you!

                Best of luck,

                NRS

            • #9
              My mom is trying to kick me out by the end of the week I have no where to go if I live the city I can't graduate or enlist both my parents are mentally abusive and my father especially physically abusive I need to leave but I can't what do i do

              Comment


              • ccsmod2
                ccsmod2 commented
                Editing a comment
                Thank you for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline (NRS). It takes a lot of courage to seek help. We are very sorry to hear that you are being abused by your parents. You don’t deserve to be treated that way. If you feel as though are in immediate danger, we encourage you to call 911. Talking to someone that you can trust like a teacher or school counselor could help. You also have the option of reporting the abuse. You may want to take pictures of your bruises as evidence of the abuse. Child Help (1-800-422-4453) is a great resource for abuse reporting and even exploring options of transferring custody to another family member. You could ask another family members or close friends if they would allow you to stay with them. If you are interested in local resources such as shelters or transitional living programs, NRS could provide you with some resources (1-800-786-2929). Don’t hesitate to contact us if you have any other questions, need resources, or would like to talk. Our crisis hotline is 24 hours and we can also be reached via email or live chat. Good Luck !

            • #10
              I'm 16 and my mom a d grandparents kicked me out two days ago. It was 1 o'clock in the morning in 20 degree weather . I had nowhere to go so I went to my cousins. But my mom has threatened to report me a runaway if I don't come back. I don't want to go back all I do is help them and give them money every time I get paid. All I want to do is graduate school so that I can get away from them. Can you help me please? I don't know what to do.

              Comment


              • ccsmod9
                ccsmod9 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hi there,
                Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline today. We understand it takes a lot of courage to reach out and we think you’re really brave for coming to us today.
                We’re so sorry to hear about what you’ve been through. It is not ok for a parent to kick their child out of the house, especially in the cold with nowhere to go. What happened to you could be considered neglect. In fact, often times when parents kick their children out of the house they will report them as runaways to the police to protect themselves against a neglect charge. If you feel comfortable doing so, you could call your local police to report this or your cousins could help you. You might also report this to a Child Protective Services. To find out more about that, please visit www.childhelp.org.
                We’re not here to pressure you into any choices discussed. Sometimes reporting isn’t something people want to do and that’s ok. It might be helpful to have your cousin or another trusted family member help you talk to your mother and grandparents about what’s been going on at home. If you can’t think of anyone and want to go this route, we can help. We offer a conference call service here where we’d be able to help you talk to a legal guardian about what’s been going on at home. If that sounds like an option you’d like to explore, you can call us directly to set it up at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929).
                Sometimes talking about the issue in more detail can lead to options that you previously didn’t consider. If you’d like to talk about this more, we encourage you to call us directly or chat right here on this website. If you’re kicked out again and don’t have a place to go, we can help you find a shelter or you can go to www.Nationalsafeplace.org to find a place for you to go.
                Stay Safe,
                NRS

            • #11
              Well im a 16 year old girl and iv been through a lot with my mom nd she actually messed my life up to the point i have depression and as a child she brainwashed me to say my dads wife was crazy and so i have no contact with him i have no family or friends because everyone has problems with my mom cuz shes stupid and shes recently had a bf who hit her and me and my little sister witnessed it with my boyfriend he recently lost his wallet and accused my boyfriend that iv been dating for over 2 years and my boyfriend does not live in the same city as me and its a no go to him butt my mother is still with this abusive guy and she chooses to do nothing bout the fact that he hit her nad it bothers me i do wanna leave the house but i dont know where to go i cant put up with my mom or her bf and he constantly brings up stuff bout me and hes abusive, crazy, he cut my boyfriends hand broke stuff and i just think he should go but my mom thinks she matters more so my question is where can i go nd wht should i do about the decision

              Comment


              • ccsmod5
                ccsmod5 commented
                Editing a comment
                Thanks for writing in. It sounds like you’re in a really difficult and frustrating situation. You’ve been through a lot and you must be a really strong person to still be pushing through and thinking about your safety. You absolutely deserve to feel safe and supported in your own home. It sounds like the situation is potentially unsafe for you and your sister. If you ever feel like you’re in immediate danger, you can always call 9-1-1. We’re not legal experts, but this situation may also qualify as neglectful or abusive depending on the details. You might consider reaching out to the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453. Another resource that might be helpful is the National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233.
                It sounds like you’re thinking of leaving home. We’re not legal experts, but generally 18 is the age at which you can leave home without parental consent. If you do choose to leave home without consent, your mom would have the right to file a runaway report. If the police are able to locate you, they would bring you home. If that happens, you can share what’s going on with the police and they’re supposed to investigate the situation. Another option would be to ask your mom if you can stay elsewhere, perhaps with another family member, a friend, or your boyfriend. If you’re able to get her consent to leave, there should be no issue legally. Before leaving, it might be a good idea to think about where you’ll live, for how long, and what your backup plan would be if that living situation doesn’t work out. You might also want to think about where you’ll get food and income, what school you’d attend, etc.
                Thank you again for reaching out. It takes a lot of courage to go through what you’ve gone through. We wish you the best of luck and if you ever need to talk or find resources, please feel free to call us 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929. Stay strong.

            • #12
              I am 16 and this is where I am at right now. All of my life I feel as if I don't belong. I am adopted and have adoptive parents. They have done many forms of abuse to me, making me eat rotten milk, and other foods and laughing at me and saying I have to eat my own puke if I puke things up from a meal that don't agree with my stomach this is just one example from the many. They would hit me and shove me and pull my hair when they were angry at me, and this one time when I didn't know where to put some things in the kitchen, they grabbed my by my hair and shoved my face into the fridge hard, and or the counter and laugh and say "now do you know where it goes?" Anyways, I was in very bad depression, and no one believed me when I would tell them these things. Police have gotten involved before, and after talking to my parents they said I was being a inconsiderate child and just wanted attention and ******** like that. I was sent to the hospital for a week and a half because I truly wanted to off myself. After that, I was back at home being yelled at and back to the same old. School was my only safe place, as I wasn't allowed ever hanging out with friends or going to places, or even having fun at all. Well, it turned out that the school actually suspended me for taking sticky notes off of lockers. And they made it seem like such a big deal, and hated me for it. I ran away that day because I felt like I had no safe place to go. After a week or so I went back home, and right away they yelled and screamed at me and physically abused me and threw my stuff at me and so I texted a friend, and they said they would take me in, so I left. After being at my friends for a bit, they started stealing my things and when I confronted them about these things they kicked me out. I talked to the new school I enrolled in about these situations, and they suggested group homes and places, but I don't want to live in those kinds of places. I want to have a place and feel like I belong. I don't want to live in a group home or a shelter. I got a boyfriend, and his mum was kind and took me in and said she wouldn't kick me out like they did and that she loved me and was sorry that I had to go through all of this. However, tonight, she just talked to her son (my boyfriend) about kicking me out for this small stuff that doesn't make sense as to why she doesn't want me here anymore. I talked to someone a while ago about this thing where you get supported by the government, where you get to live in an apartment and stuff, and I was wondering about if that was an actual thing. The situation right now is hurting me a lot and I just want a stable home environment where I am accepted for who I am and am not frowned upon and kicked out for everything I am apparently doing so wrong. I want to live with my boyfriend, and be able to safely store my things, and be able to focus on school and have a good environment for once without having to worry when I might be kicked out on the streets again. I want my own place with my boyfriend. But I don't know what to do or if this is possible.

              Comment


              • #13
                Reply:I am 16 and this is where I am at right now

                Hi,
                Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

                We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing what has been going on. We’re sorry you’re going through this. You don't deserve to be hurt in any way.
                It sounds like you might want information on a safe place to stay and that may also have independent living services.

                If you’re feeling unsafe and need a safe place to go and talk to someone about programs in your area that offers a Transitional Living Program, you may wish to visit The National Safeplace website (www.nationalsafeplace.org). This organization provides access to immediate help and supportive resources for youth in need. You can look up your city and state to see if there are any safe places near you listed. So this an option if you feel like talking to someone in person about what has been going on or if you just need of a safe place to stay.

                You also may use your phone to text the word “safe” and your current location (city/state/zip) to 69866. If there are safe places and shelters nearby, a list of those will be sent to your phone and you may have the option to text back and forth with a trained counselor as well.

                You may also be able to report any mistreatment by your adopted parents to CPS.
                Child Help USA 1-800-422-4453 www.childhelp.org is an organization that helps protect minors from being harmed. It may also be a good place to explore options for staying with another family member or someone you trust as far as transferring custody.

                Often, having a safe space to share how you’re feeling may bring a variety of solutions previously not thought of. You are not alone in this. We want you to know that we are here as support to help you through this challenging time. You are welcome to contact NRS at 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) or www.1800Runaway.org (live chat).
                NRS is here to listen and here to help. You did a great job reaching out today.

                Be safe,
                NRS
                Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

                National Runaway Safeline
                info@1800runaway.org (Crisis Email)
                1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

                Tell us what you think about your experience!
                https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

                Comment


                • #14
                  I am 16
                  I was kicked out at night
                  Had to sleep at my apartment staircase for a night
                  Dont know where to go? what to do
                  I dont got friends to live with

                  Comment


                  • ccsmod8
                    ccsmod8 commented
                    Editing a comment
                    Hello there –

                    Thanks so much for reaching out to us here on our public forum. We are here to listen and help in any way that we can. From what you have posted it sounds like you’re in a really unfortunate situation and need some help. No one deserves to be treated that way or kicked out their home. Just know that you always have the right to report any abuse (physical, mental, sexual, or neglect/abandonment) to your local police department or child protective service in your state. You have rights too and it is illegal to leave a minor out on the street. If calling out to child protective services is something that you don’t really feel comfortable with doing, you can always give us a call to help answer any questions about the process or to walk you through what steps there are. Another thing that we can offer you, is that we can look up in our database to see if there are any youth shelter nearby that you can go to and get your basic needs meant. They also might be able to do some family mediation to resolve some of those issues that lead to being kicked out of the house.

                    We hope to hear from you soon!

                • #15
                  I’m 16 and my mom wants me to leave. I want to continue goIng to my high school and working at my job. What can I do? Am I legally able to stay with a friend? All of my family is in a different state and the family I do have is far away so I would not be able to stay at my school. Please help. My mom wants me to leave Tomorrow!!!!!!

                  Comment


                  • ccsmod5
                    ccsmod5 commented
                    Editing a comment
                    Hey,
                    Thanks so much for reaching out. It sounds like you’re in a pretty frustrating situation and it makes sense that you would want to stay where you feel comfortable. We’re not legal experts, but generally speaking you need your guardian’s permission to stay with a friend. If your mom is okay with that, then there should be no legal issue. If you wanna talk more specifically about your situation or figure out your other options, please feel free to reach out to us at our hotline, 1-800-786-2929. Best of luck to you!
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