Planning to get out of this household.

[Guest]

I’m 19 years old and still leaving with my parents due to finally receiving my permanent residency here. I’ve been noticing my step dad giving me angry looks, or silently saying things ever since i was about 12. I wonder what did I do to make him upset, if it’s the fact that i’m almost 20 and haven’t moved out, i’m not paying him for staying at the house or even groceries when jobs have been tight here. It’s the smallest pettiest things he can do that only targets me that gets me overwhelmed. But other than that my mother and my step siblings love me so much and i just am confused and actually hurt why my step dad doesn’t even if he didn’t why hasn’t he said anything at all. I’ve just had it with it and i don’t know what to do anymore.

[ccsmod11]

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Hi there,
Thanks so much for reaching out. It sounds like you are dealing with a lot right now with your step dad, as well as the stress of deciding whether or not you're ready to move out. This is a lot for anyone to deal with.

You mentioned that he frequently gives you dirty looks and has been doing so for a long time. Does your mom or your step siblings know that this happens? How would they react if you mentioned it to them? It might be worth letting them know you are experiencing this to get some advice from them on how to handle things. Additionally, it may be worth talking to trusted friends or extended family members about how his actions make you feel.

Would talking to your stepfather directly allow you to address the situation? If you feel safe to do so, this might be a way to really understand what's going on and why he might be giving you dirty looks. Then you can know for sure if he really wants you to move out or if there's something else entirely going on. We would be more than happy to help walk you through how to navigate this conversation so that you can be as comfortable as possible.

We would love to hear more about your story and give you more personalized and confidential help. Please feel free to reach out to us directly any time to talk to a real person. The
NRS is here 24/7 via online chat or by calling 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929).