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15, trans, on hormones

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  • 15, trans, on hormones

    It’s been really rocky this past year but today my mom has been threatening to kill herself over and over again due to me self medicating estrogen. I thought she knew (had been on it for 7 months) and i told her at the doctor, trying to be honest. She’s been in a constant spiral ever since, threatening to kill herself and that it’ll be my fault and that my younger sibling will be left without a mom.

    Keeps commenting on my body and how all I care about is “my tits and ass” and that I’m mentally ill and ruining my body. I’m forced to self medicate and she’s not even doing damage control, no doctors or anything, just telling me I’m going to die. Going off hormones isn’t an option, before I started I was constantly thinking about suicide.

    Honestly wanted to vent a little bit, I don’t know if I’ll run away because I have no money and it’s extremely tough to be homeless.

  • #2
    Hi there, thank you for reaching out. This sounds like a tough situation with your mom and you do not deserve to be spoken to or treated this way. It would not be your fault in any way if she did something to harm herself and it sounds like she needs help or support as well for the things she is saying to you. It could be helpful to even talk to your doctor or another adult in your life that you trust to see if they can help. Also you had said that you are self-estrogen, we just recommend doing it in a safe way and even talking to your doctor about that as well. It sounds like since starting hormones, you have not been considering suicide, so it seems that it has been helping. You deserve the space to be who you are and accepted for who you are as well. It seems like you are uncertain about wanting to run away as it can be difficult to be homeless, but if you would like to discuss more about possible options or more about what you are going through, please call our hotline 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or chat us online at
    Be safe,
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
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