I don't know what to do

[Guest]

I hate my mom and have been struggling mentally for months now. My mom is emotionally and mentally manipulative and overall toxic. I'd honestly rather be at school than at home right now. My first problem was her extreme over protectiveness. I'm 15 and still can't walk to school (It is only a 10 minute walk), she still doesn't like me helping to cook that much especially when chopping something up. She won't let me ride my bike, skateboard, or do any kind of playing by myself out front, and she won't let me on any social media platforms except for YouTube, but she won't let me make an account and limits what I watch to only Minecraft videos and craft and art related videos. And many other things. She also doesn't give me hardly any privacy. She always walks in and ask what I am doing. I never do anything or watch anything that would be deemed inappropriate for my age but she doesn't trust me hence her giving no privacy. At night before bed she makes me put my phone and tablet in the kitchen, and during this time she usually goes through my phone and will me on any sort of conversation between my friends. I am even risking it being on here. Months ago I came out and at first it went overall okay, but the conversations that followed about it made me really uncomfortable.One of things she would say about it is that is is influence and that I am not really queer and blames it on my new friends and acquaintances. She also said word for word straight to my face "You can't possibly know you haven't even dated yet!" Implying she knows more about me than I know abut myself. She tries to say she is supportive of the LGBTQ+ community but the things she says, says otherwise. Also for about two months now I have had tics. She first noticed them a couple weeks ago. She keeps insisting that I am faking it and to stop which I can't do. She also said that night that if I still have those tics in four days she would take me to a doctor to get it checked out. Four days later I ask if she can take me to the doctor because to no surprise I still had the tics and she refused to ever make an appointment for it and went off about it again. A couple nights ago, my parents had a talk about one of my friends influencing me again. And it was a big deal. I don't want to get into details of it but this event is what threw me over the edge. That night I just about ran away and started packing a few changes of clothing but stopped myself because I didn't have a plan or the guts to actually run away from home.That night I practically just cried myself to sleep. My dad is, for the most part, the only good person in this situation. He intervenes when my mom goes too far and refuses to leave arguments between my mom and I because of that. He also asked if I wanted to talk to a therapist and I thought about it for a little while after. When it got brought up in a conversation with my parents and I, she got kinda upset. She doesn't think I need to talk to a therapist and doesn't really want me to go. My mom has put me through a lot of emotional turmoil, and I want to get away from her but I don't think I have the guts to, and I don't want to leave my dad or my friends. Also I would probably run a risk going to school still if I ran away, but I want to at least get through all four years of high school. I have no idea what to do.

[ccsmod1]

Hi there,

We appreciate you reaching out to us here at National Runaway Safeline. We recognize that it takes a lot of courage and strength to seek help with these types of situations. We are sorry to hear that you are going through this experience with your mom and it sounds like you are feeling like your mom may not understand you or is trying to control the person you are and want to be. We hear what you are saying when you do not feel like she is supportive of the LGBTQ+ community, given her commentary. Do you think her response could be due to her lack of understanding? It could be possible that your mom does not know enough about the LGBTQ+ community and it could be worth finding out if she is willing to learn more about the community.

It sounds like your dad is very empathetic and compassionate with you and the situation you are in. Though your mom might not be thrilled with the idea of therapy, is your dad still willing to take you? Therapy could act as a safe space for you to talk about any and every emotion and thought you are experiencing. A therapist could potentially help you navigate through these struggles with your mom and above all, they could also help you work on coping skills to ensure that you are practicing self-care.

We know that you mentioned you do not want to leave your dad or your friends and we are glad to hear that they are supportive enough to where they make you want to stay. We empower you to continue to lean on your dad and friends for support during this time. It sounds like the biggest step is finding a way to co-exist at home with your mom or even more so, trying to mend your relationship with her and it seems like your dad may also be working with you to try and help as well.

We welcome you to contact us through our chat portal on our website at www.1800runaway.org or give us a call on the phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY. By talking to you through one of these outlets, we could have a further conversation with you where we could help you explore options or provide you with potential resources. Please note that our services run on a 24/7 basis, so you may contact us at any time.

We look forward to the opportunity to talk with you more about this. In the meantime, we wish you health, happiness, and safety.

Kindly,
NRS

[Guest]

Hi, i am 14 and i live with my father and my step mother
my father is abusive he leaves marks and ive tried cps may times and none of them work...
i cannot live with my mother with the fear of being raped by one of her boyfriends again
my step mother is verbally abusive i see that alot of people get that
she hurts
my dad does as well
im thinking bout running away i dont think i should
but im always scared
im talking to my boyfriend about it but im scared he will tell someone
if he does i screwed....
i have no idea what to do
i thought about OD on my depression meds
but i hate the facts of leaving my sibling to abusive parents with no one to protect them....
what do i do...please help...i dont know what to do

[ccsmod6]

Hi and thank you for reaching out to NRS. We are saddened to hear that you have been treated so poorly by both of your parents. It must be very overwhelming that the adults in your life have not provided safety and care for you. You deserve unconditional love, respect, and safety in your life. We would like to provide you with some ideas and resources that you may find helpful. If you need immediate help and feel you are in danger in any way, you can call the police. You can also send a text to the number 44357 and text the word SAFE and your current location with your address, city, and state to get immediate help. They are available 24/7. If you are feeling suicidal at any point, you can reach out to the national suicide prevention hotline at 1-800-273-8255. They are also available 24/7. You can also go to their website at www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org where you can find find some information that may be helpful to you or you can use their live chat feature as well. www.justiceforchildren.org might be worth checking into. They are an organization that may be able to help when CPS has failed. If you would like to talk to us in person or over live chat, we are also available 24/7. You can find our live chat at www.1800runaway.org or you can call us at 1-800-runaway. It may be helpful to talk to a live person who can help you sort through your options and situation. We hope this response was helpful to you and encourage you to check into the ideas provided. Please reach back out at anytime! We are here to listen and help 24/7 and we are very glad you reached. We would like to provide you with any further guidance you feel you need. Wishing you the very best, NRS!